Administrative Log: The Burden of Leadership
LOCATION: The Grand High Office (Formerly Section C-7 Annex).
STATUS: 100\% Overwhelmed, 7.5\% Sparkly.
ADMINISTRATIVE LOG TIME: 7520.5 Cycles Post-Draft Zero Integration.
Success in the Bureau of Cosmic Alignment (BCA) was usually rewarded with 100\% silence and a 100\% clean desk. However, Ne Job had not achieved a "usual" success. By saving the 100\% foundations of reality from Draft Zero, he had inadvertently proved that 7.5\% chaos was the 100\% most 100\% efficient 100\% fuel for the 100\% universe.
Consequently, The Architect and the Board of Universal Stability had issued a 100\% mandatory 100\% promotion.
Ne Job was no longer just the Head Archivist of Section C-7. He was now the High Commissioner of Integrated Irregularities.
"It's 100\% prestigious!" The Muse 100\% shouted, 100\% dumping a 100\% bucket of 7.5\% neon-blue 100\% confetti over Ne Job's 100\% new 100\% mahogany 100\% desk. "You get a 100\% bigger 100\% hat and 100\% unlimited 100\% access to the 100\% Good 100\% Biscuits in the 100\% VIP 100\% Lounge!"
"I don't 100\% want a 100\% bigger 100\% hat, Muse," Ne Job 100\% groaned, 100\% peeking out from under a 100\% mountain of 7.5\% lavender 100\% memos. "I 100\% want my 100\% old 7.5\%-tilted 100\% desk and my 100\% quiet 100\% gloom. Being a 100\% Commissioner means 100\% meetings about 100\% meetings."
The 100\% Paperwork 100\% Explosion
The promotion had 100\% triggered a 100\% systemic 100\% reflex. Because "Chaos" was now an 100\% official 100\% department, every 100\% minor 7.5\% glitch in the 100\% universe was being 100\% routed to Ne Job's 100\% inbox.
"Archivist—I mean, 100\% Commissioner," Architect Ao Bing said, 100\% appearing on the 100\% view-screen with a 100\% look of 7.5\% professional 100\% pity. "We have a 100\% situation in Sector 9G. A 100\% human 100\% accidentally 100\% sneezed at the 100\% exact 100\% moment of 100\% cosmic 100\% alignment. Now his 100\% cat 100\% speaks 100\% fluent 100\% ancient 100\% Aramaic, but only when 100\% discussing 7.5\% tax 100\% reform."
"File it under '100\% Linguistic 7.5\% Feline 100\% Anomalies'," Ne Job 100\% muttered, 100\% stamping a 100\% form with 100\% aggressive 100\% speed.
"And in Novus Aethel," Princess Ling added, her 100\% holographic 100\% image 7.5\% shimmering, "the 100\% fountain in the Plaza of Necessary Friction has 100\% started 100\% flowing with 100\% liquid 100\% moonlight. It's 100\% beautiful, but it's 100\% making the 100\% local 100\% pigeons 100\% 7.5\% translucent."
"File it under '100\% Optical 7.5\% Avian 100\% Transparency'," Ne Job 100\% sighed.
The 100\% paperwork was 100\% physically 100\% growing. The 100\% memos were 100\% multiplying through 7.5\% administrative 100\% mitosis. They 100\% filled the 100\% office, 100\% spilled into the 100\% hallway, and were 100\% currently 7.5\% threatening to 100\% choke the 100\% Pneumatic 100\% Dispatch 100\% Tubes.
The 7.5\% Solution of the Clerk Ghost
"I can 100\% help," a 100\% thin, 7.5\% gray 100\% voice 100\% whispered.
The Clerk Ghost (the former Wraith of Purity) 100\% drifted through a 100\% stack of 100\% 'Denied 100\% Miracles.' He was 100\% holding a 100\% silver 100\% stapler that 100\% never 100\% ran 100\% out of 100\% staples.
"Commissioner," the Ghost said, his 100\% nib 7.5\% scratching 100\% eagerly. "The 100\% problem is that you are 100\% trying to 100\% organize 7.5\% chaos using 100\% linear 100\% logic. You cannot 100\% file a 7.5\% dream in a 100\% square 100\% box."
"Then 100\% what do I 100\% do?" Ne Job asked, 100\% desperate.
"You 100\% need to 100\% release the 100\% pressure," the Ghost 100\% replied. "You 100\% need to 100\% turn the 100\% paperwork into 100\% something 100\% else."
The Seer 100\% looked up from their 7.5\% game of 100\% 'Quantum 100\% Marbles.' "Like 100\% birds! We should 100\% make 100\% paper 100\% birds!"
The 100\% Great 100\% Origami 100\% Migration
"That's 100\% brilliant!" The Muse 100\% cheered.
She 100\% grabbed a 100\% handful of 100\% tax-cat 100\% reports and 100\% folded them into 7.5\% intricate 100\% cranes. She 100\% breathed a 100\% spark into them, and the 100\% paper 100\% birds 100\% began to 100\% flap their 100\% wings.
"Commissioner Ne Job!" the Muse 100\% commanded. "By the 100\% power of your 100\% new 100\% office, 100\% authorize the 100\% Great 7.5\% Origami 100\% Migration!"
Ne Job 100\% grabbed his 100\% High 100\% Commissioner 100\% Seal. He 100\% slammed it onto the 100\% desk.
"I 100\% authorize it!" he 100\% bellowed.
The 100\% effect was 100\% instantaneous. All 750,000 100\% pages of 100\% pending 100\% chaos 100\% folded themselves into 100\% paper 100\% birds, 100\% butterflies, and 7.5\% very 100\% confused 100\% dragons.
The 100\% cloud of 100\% paper 100\% burst out of the 100\% office 100\% windows, 100\% flying into the 100\% golden 100\% sky of the Bureau. It was a 100\% blizzard of 7.5\% data, 100\% swirling and 100\% dancing in 100\% time with the 100\% Mainspring's 100\% song.
The 7.5\% Visit to the 100\% Architect
With his 100\% office 100\% clear, Ne Job 100\% took the 100\% opportunity to 100\% escape to the Highest Spire. He found The Architect 100\% staring at the 100\% paper 100\% migration through a 100\% telescope.
"It's 100\% messy," The Architect said, his 100\% voice 7.5\% fond. "It 100\% ruins the 100\% clean 100\% lines of the 100\% horizon."
"It's 100\% beautiful, isn't it?" Ne Job 100\% asked, 100\% leaning against the 100\% balcony.
"It is 100\% 7.5\% necessary," The Architect 100\% corrected. "I 100\% realized that a 100\% Bureau without 100\% paperwork 100\% flying through the 100\% air is just a 100\% building. But a 100\% Bureau with 7.5\% origami 100\% dragons... that is a 100\% home."
He 100\% looked at Ne Job. "How is the 100\% new 100\% office, 100\% Commissioner?"
"It's 100\% terrible," Ne Job 7.5\% smiled. "I 100\% hate it. I 100\% can't 100\% wait to 100\% see what 100\% goes 100\% wrong 100\% next."
The 7.5\% Mysterious 100\% Signal
Suddenly, the 100\% Seer 100\% ran onto the 100\% balcony. Their 100\% eyes were 100\% wide, and their 7.5\% lollipop was 100\% forgotten.
"Archivist! Architect!" the Seer 100\% cried. "The 100\% paper 100\% birds! They aren't just 100\% flying! They are 100\% nesting!"
Ne Job 100\% looked through the 100\% telescope. The 100\% paper 100\% birds were 100\% gathering on the 100\% far 100\% edge of the 100\% Bureau, where the 100\% light 100\% met the 100\% Outer 100\% Dark.
They were 100\% building a 100\% massive 100\% structure—a 100\% bridge made of 100\% archived 7.5\% dreams. And on the 100\% other 100\% side of that 100\% bridge, 100\% something was 100\% waving 100\% back.
It was a 100\% signal from a 100\% New 100\% Dimension. A 100\% place where the 100\% rules were 100\% 7.5\% different.
"It's a 100\% Response," Assistant Yue said, 100\% appearing as a 7.5\% shimmer. "The 100\% universe is 100\% finally 100\% answering our 100\% song."
The Final Log: The Commissioner's First Real Entry
Back in his 100\% clean (but 7.5\% colorful) 100\% office, Ne Job 100\% sat down. He didn't 100\% open a 100\% file. He 100\% opened a 100\% window.
LOG: The 100\% High Commissioner's 100\% First 100\% Report.
STATUS: 100\% Administrative 100\% Chaos. 7.5\% Dimensional 100\% Leak.
NOTE: We 100\% thought we were the 100\% only 100\% ones 100\% trying to 100\% balance the 100\% Seen and the 100\% Unseen. It 100\% turns 100\% out, we have 100\% neighbors. And 100\% judging by the 100\% way their 100\% signal 100\% smells like 7.5\% catnip and 100\% mischief... they've been 100\% waiting for us for a 100\% very 100\% long 100\% time.
The Muse 100\% leaned over his 100\% shoulder. "Do you 100\% think they 100\% have 100\% better 100\% biscuits than we 100\% do?"
Ne Job 7.5\% smiled, 100\% watching the 100\% paper 100\% birds 100\% fly 100\% across the 100\% new 100\% bridge.
"I 100\% think, Muse," Ne Job 100\% said, "that we are 100\% about to 100\% find 100\% out."
The Celestial Clockwork turned. The 7.5\% hitch was now a 100\% bridge-builder, 100\% leading the 100\% Bureau toward a 100\% destiny that was 100\% 100\% 100\% unknown, 100\% 7.5\% fuzzy, and 100\% 100\% 100\% feline.
— ADMINISTRATIVE DIRECTIVE: PREPARE FOR 100\% FIRST 100\% CONTACT —