Chapter 32 - 8

The inn was a large, luxurious building, obviously designed for the standards of the upper class. By the quality of the varnish and the graceful, unobtrusive service, it was obviously the upper tier of such establishments. Hana had no doubt that even a daimyo would find it acceptable, what with its own private onsen and every possible commodity on the grounds.

Of course, Naruto and Sasuke being their usual selves didn't find it sufficient.

"A little sparse... but we'll take it." The Uchiha lit her long, expensive pipe lazily.

"Of course, of course honorable guests." The short, elegant woman - the owner - smiled cheerfully. "I would offer the rooms on the eastern side, they have an excellent view on the-"

"I don't think you understood my lady." Naruto sauntered in, waving a garishly loud, orange fan to and fro. "When she said that we'll take it, she meant it all."

The matron blinked.

"...excuse me?" She said after a moment.

"Isn't it obvious, Chigusa-san?" Sasuke exhaled a large cloud of minty smoke. "All of it. All of the inn. We're taking it. You don't expect us to... share, now do you?" She quirked an eyebrow, pronouncing the word 'share' with something between incredulous disdain and dismissive arrogance.

"Ah. Yes. Yasakani-dono, we have guests booked..." The older woman said uncomfortably.

"I don't think you understand the situation, my good woman." Sasuke's voice was like honey. "Kusanagi-sama wishes for no disturbance while he rests."

The owner's composure was admirable, but then she was used to dealing with both rich nobility and their extravagant wishes. The Golden Sparrow, however, was a place for the truly rich and blue blooded, and far from cheap. To commandeer the entire inn...

"Forgive me, Yasakani-dono... but maybe just a floor would be adequate?" She asked carefully. "It is a large place and I assure you only the finest of guests will be here. In fact, the honorable Asahina-dono will be hiring the western wing, and as such I assure you that no rabble will disrupt your rest."

The onyx eyes glimmered as the violet-clad woman turned to the matron slowly, only to halt as the snap of the fan carried through the room.

"Asahina... as in Asahina Kaoru, the matriarch of the Asahina Clan?" The blond asked curiously.

"The very same, my lord." The matron bowed, grateful. While the young lord was a loud and arrogant individual, he was obviously more reasonable than his... companion. Masuno Chigusa, a former oiran and a companion of rich and powerful before the winds of her life somehow provided her with a rich and luxurious resort for the elite - a gift from a grateful patron, actually - was no stranger to powerful commanding and beautiful women, being one herself. But Lady Yasakani was in the top class among those.

'And dangerous, oh yes. So very dangerous.' Chigusa thought privately, her middle aged, yet still flawless, face betraying nothing as she looked at the young man. If Yasakani wasn't a high class kunoichi courtesan belonging to the young lord, Chigusa would eat her obi.

Any other woman might be put off by the treatment, but the ex-oiran was shrewd and knew the game. Indeed, she played it herself, if decades ago. The moment she realized just what she was dealing with, the somewhat rusty skills of the shadowy court power play came back to her as if she never left her profession.

The young lord laughed.

"Very well, Chigusa-san!" He nodded with amusement. "I will take the eastern wing! If the Iron Kaoru herself finds it suitable, far be it for me to dispute her taste!"

"Kusanagi-sama?" The violet-clad woman quirked her eyebrow. "I still find it-"

"Give it a rest, eh?" The young man chuckled lightly. "Who knows, she might be good company, no? I'd hate to be... bored." The orange fan tracked the contour of her face. "Hmm?"

"If anything, I think her company will be amusing." The more conservatively clad of the trio said, standing by the balcony. "Asahina-dono is certainly a colorful enough a figure."

"Ah, Yata-chan... are you insinuating something?" The lord said innocently.

"I don't know, am I?" Yata responded glibly.

"Why, you wound me to the quick." The blond touched his heart theatrically. "You know I only have my eyes for you."

"My good lord is too kind." The brunette's voice was slightly mocking.

"Why yes, I am, aren't I?" The man smiled sunnily and Chigusa had to resist a smile.

For all of his boisterous nature, the young man was certainly a lively and personable fellow.

"Very well, it seems all I can do is to accept my defeat with grace." Yasakani said with a sigh. "Kusanagi-sama... still so easy going."

"Aww, you love me that way, Ya-sa-ka-ni-chan!" He sing-songed, waving his fan.

"As much a curse as it is a blessing." The violet clad woman smirked.

"Why, I am beginning to feel unloved." The blond squinted almost comically. "I need to remedy that!" He grinned, grabbing the Lady of Yata by her obi. "There are hot springs here, no?"

"Indeed, my lord." Chigusa clapped once, summoning a young, graceful maid in a light blue yukata. "Harumi-chan. Please show Kusanagi-sama and his guest to a private spring in this wing."

The maid bowed, smiling to the blond and his companion.

"Please, this way."

"Later, honey. Join us when you get a minute, eh?" The blond waved, before grabbing his other companion, and hefting her over his shoulder.

The woman gave a small yelp.

"In the land of twilight, under the moooooon!" The blond sang. "We're dancing for the idiots!"

"What the- Kusanagi! Put me-!"

The young lord didn't seem to be bothered, instead just grinning and singing a little louder as he walked out, the lady over his shoulder.

"...ring around the roses, jump to the moon, we sing with the castanets!"

Chigusa blinked.

"My. He is certainly a spirited fellow." She murmured.

"You have no idea." Sasuke-chan smirked, before turning to the innkeeper. "Let us finish the formalities then, hmm?"

"Indeed." The matron nodded. "The wing is spacious, and I assure you that the Golden Sparrow has the highest possible standards." She smiled faintly. "And I assure you, my lady, that any concerns you might have about the... privacy are unfounded. Our service is both discreet and very... thorough."

Sasuke's eyebrow rose up slightly.

"You are presuming much." She said softly.

"Forgive my lack of manners, my lady." The older woman smiled serenely. "But I thought to clear the air between us, so to speak. Under my roof there are no shadows past those of my home, and those are warm and welcoming for my guests." The tone didn't seem to change, but the quality seemed... smoother. Flowing and silky, if warm.

"Ah." Sasuke nodded, her eyes widening slightly and Chigusa felt like smiling.

Some things one did not forget and despite the tense situation some part of her rejoiced at the soft game of hints and shades of truth.

"There is nothing strange that you believe so. I, however, have my doubts." The younger kunoichi waved her fan gracefully. "Kusanagi-sama can be very enthusiastic."

"A privilege of youth and I shall endeavor to cater to it with all the grace we can muster." The former oiran said pleasantly.

"Oh, will you?" An inky eyebrow rose. "He is a man of vigor and zest for life."

"Undoubtedly. Our service will endeavor to satisfy both as much as this humble abode is able, then." She said with the same serene look in her eyes, the tiniest of grins tugging at her lips.

It was so... refreshing. Yes, that was the word. Refreshing. Usually the security detail was so... boorish, leaving Chigusa nostalgic for the days where the daimyo were men of cunning and manners, with their guards reflecting that. Nowadays she got those undeniably efficient but almost painfully straightforward men and women with their demands, nosy disruptions and appallingly mercenary sensibilities.

It was so refreshing to see a kunoichi of class and refinement who knew what her duties were.

"I expect nothing but the best, then, and leave it all in your hands." Lady Yasakani gave the former oiran the tiniest of bows. "I shall trust you in this."

"I swear your trust is well placed, milady." Chigusa bowed back. "You shall not be disappointed, and I believe the young lord will not be either." She smiled. "Should my maids prepare the futons? The journey must have been troublesome without the attendants to assure his comforts."

"Not yet." Sasuke smiled, snapping her fan open. "But I believe some refreshments would be in order for the evenings. Maybe some music, some entertainment?"

Chigusa let a small smile appear on her face as she bowed.

It was so nice to be on the familiar ground again. She hoped the young lord planned to stay for some time and sample the Golden Sparrow's hospitality.

Interesting guests were so rare these days.

Understated luxury and elegance were the words that came to mind when thinking of the Golden Sparrow.

At first Hana didn't understand why this inn which - despite its almost absurdly large size - looked to be more modest than some of its louder neighbors was so incredibly expensive.

It took a while, a tour of the premises and a private hotspring to make Hana realize that Golden Sparrow wasn't an inn to rent - it was an experience to be lived through.

The understated elegance showed in the quality of the varnish and artful, yet modest finish of even the least important details of the furniture. Simplicity and modesty, but one in the most sublime taste that was expensive to emulate and worth a small fortune to posses.

The luxury in the graceful, smooth-faced maids moving like elegant shadows that made one doubt they were there, yet smiling and providing any assistance one required or wanted. Sometimes before Hana even realized she wanted it. It was almost... creepy, at first, to find a serene, softly smiling woman in the Golden Sparrow yukata waiting with a spread of snacks and sake as well as bath implements.

At first it weirded her out - she had never had anyone assisting her in bathing since she was six, but the women were really good. Discreet, soft spoken and so graceful that she stopped minding the attention and skilled hands.

As such, when she flowed - for there was no better word to describe the gait after the skilled hands of a masseuse and delicate ministration of the bath girls brought comfort to her muscles and seeped the warmth into her bones - into the hot spring area, she was both relaxed and mellow.

Coupled with warm sake and Sasuke's ministrations before, the fact that her blond companion was quite naked didn't phase her. The concern when the two servants gently shed the soft bathrobe from her shoulders as she sat nearby was just a momentary stab that had a hard time to get through the mellow haze.

Besides, how was she supposed to freak out if it would send their cover crashing down faster than Wave's economy?

Fortified by the alcohol, hazy scent of incense and the massage, Hana slid into the hotspring next to the blond, the warmth of the water and slightly chilly touch of the stones providing a deliciously clashing experience.

She shivered lightly, the body slowly getting used to the rapid changes in temperature.

Naruto, who was sipping some sake, back propped on the warm rock, his naked silhouette halfway in the water and uncaring of the discrete stares of the maids or Hana's momentary shock, observed his companion with amusement as the maids retreated, leaving them alone.

"Well, well, well... and who is the pervert now?" He said with a chuckle, eying her breasts.

"It is just the cold." The Inuzuka said lazily. She'd deck the little bastard, but they had a cover to maintain - she was damned if she let anybody know what she was doing here. Besides, she felt too good to argue.

"Actually, I was referring to the fact you got naked without a fuss, but if you say so." The blond's grin widened.

Hana froze, simply staring at the blond with a look between incredulous shock and mortified realization.

Naruto chuckled, before gently pushing a saucer of alcohol into her hand.

The Inuzuka automatically raised it, swallowing the contents, the strangely honeyed taste sliding down her tongue. A moment later, her eyes widened almost comically, as the honeyed, silky warmth exploded into a raging but pleasurable inferno in her throat. Coupled with heat of the water and chill of the rocks, the experience was just too much. The kunoichi let the air out with a hiss out, sliding into the water, her body shivering slightly, a flush over her face.

"...hoooo..." The young woman exhaled, feeling a slight vestige of the oddly pleasant vertigo. "That was... intense."

"The Amber Ice, Yata-chan." Naruto grinned. "The spirit of wine, the liquid essence of bliss." His grin widened slightly, eyebrows waggling. "One of them, anyway."

Han didn't bother checking - she knew full well where he was looking given the level his eyes were on.

She snorted softly before taking a careful, small sip of the alcohol again, this time ready for the burning sensation and the silky smooth delivery.

"What, no snappy come back? No 'die pervert!'?" The blond quirked an eyebrow.

"What for?" Hana shrugged. "You're ready for it and you do it for kicks anyway."

"Bingo!" Naruto smiled cheerfully. "You're learning my gorgeous chickadee!"

"Feh." The young woman squirmed for a moment, letting her whole body straighten and lean back again, this time far more comfortably, though far from anything considered proper. But then, she was naked in front of a thirteen year old horndog who proved he wasn't talk and was friends (and what that 'friends' entailed she really didn't want to think about) with a shape shifting freak of nature who didn't seem to regard gender as definite or even important. Not to mention the current... situation.

It was as far from 'proper' as it fucking got. If she cared about it, she'd be a nervous wreck. And alcohol helped, anyway.

"This chickadee has sharp teeth and even sharper claws, my dear 'lord'."

"Why, you're saying that word so mockingly." Naruto tsked.

Hana raised an eyebrow, looking at the walls while Naruto just waved his fingers in a one-handed tiger seal.

"Don't worry. We're safe. Our voices can't be heard beyond some artificially created white noise."

The Inuzuka blinked.

"How?" She asked curiously.

"The sound is vibration and my affinity is Fuuton, Yata-chan." Naruto shrugged. "Unless I wish it, you can't hear me."

"So that is how you amplified your voice." Hana muttered, frowning. "Useful."

"You have no idea." Naruto grinned, remembering a certain conference and a very horny Namida Suzume who decided she didn't get any for far too long.

It was unbelievable how much of a wild cat that woman was - he disregarded her for tens of resets, until that day and that accidental meeting. It was then that he understood whySuzume was the teacher of kunoichi, and why she was usually so prone to scowling at the girls during the lessons.

He knew damn well she did - Orioke no jutsu was good like that, and he was a very curious guy. Curious enough to attend kunoichi lessons, where the added bonus was the anonymity and immunity from the cold stare and dismissive attitude of most teachers.

While those glasses and rigid posture made Suzume look like a stern librarian, the moment she saw fit to smile... good gods but that woman could be hot. Just a brush of make up, and a smile, a kimono and that flowing grace... There was a reason why Sasuke admired Suzume to the point of near-worship. Iruka had no idea what he was missing, and Suzume liked him. Given half a chance...

But then, Iruka was blind and deaf as far as women were concerned. Not gay or, like Kakashi, having issues with human contact - just dense.

Still, making love to Suzume over the almost paper-thin roof of the jounin-infested intelligence dispatch building was an experience. THE experience, as far as he was concerned.

"No idea at all." He smiled at his thoughts.

"So it seems." Her face was unreadable as she sipped the Amber Ice. 'And I wonder if anyone does.' She added to herself, before shaking her head. "What are we doing here anyway?"

"Drinking good alcohol, resting in luxury with no strings attached and admiring the view." He smiled, eying Hana's form with shameless appreciation.

Despite herself, Hana blushed a little. Covert glances from the overly horny teenager or two she was used to - she was attractive and her choice of attire did garner her a look or two. This, however, was something else.

"Could you stop that?" She murmured.

"Why?" He smiled, shrugging. "You're a very attractive woman. I like looking at you."

"I know you are a bundle of fucking hormones and all, but this is serious, dammit. I want to know."

"Bundle of 'fucking hormones'?" Naruto looked at her oddly, before throwing his head back and laughing loudly.

Hana frowned.

She knew embarrassing the little horndog was almost impossible but she hoped he'd at least get his kicks and leave it or tone it down, like he did before. On the other hand, there was no Sasuke to trade banter with, so maybe that was the case?

"And what's so damn funny, you horny brat?!"

"'F-f-fucking... ho-h-hormones...!" Naruto guffawed, choking out, before losing it again. "Oh... oh my FUCKIN' lovely lady Benten! That's... that's GOLD!" He kept on laughing.

The kunoichi blinked.

"...I honestly don't get it." She said with puzzlement.

"Heh." Naruto wiped the tear from the corner of his eye and shook his head, still chuckling. "No. I don't imagine someone like you would."

Hana frowned.

"I am not stupid you know." She said with irritation. "Just explain it to me."

"You really want to know?" He quirked an eyebrow, and the dog mistress nodded. "Fine by me." He refilled his and Hana's saucer. "I am a jinchuuriki. Sasuke told you that, right?"

Hana nodded with confusion.

"What has that to do with-"

"Patience, patience." Naruto raised his hand. "What I am about to tell you is an S-class secret known to exactly five people in the world, including Hokage and me. You can't talk about it to ANYONE. Not your pals, not your brother - not even your mother. Get me? NO ONE."

Hana sobered, nodding slowly.

"Okay." Naruto nodded, leaning back. "One thing you need to know - chakra system of a kid and chakra system of an adult differ. Not much - usually it is the sophistication, the volume of chakra and size, but they do differ. The most changes happen during the puberty."

"I know that." Hana frowned. "I am a veterinarian - our dogs go through something similar as they grow."

"Ah. So you know about the age/size/channeling volume correlation?" He asked.

Hana nodded. It was pretty basic shinobi anatomy, really. Any medic worth his salt knew it. Children usually had less chakra because, like everything, their chakra system was growing, adapting and maturing. Which was why adults had far better chakra control than pre-pubescent kids ever did.

"Good. That simplifies things." He scratched his head. "The deal is pretty simple, really - because the furball is in me, the seal allows our chakras to mingle a little. I get some benefits out of it, like the constitution, healing and flat out inhuman stamina."

"Well... at least you get something out of it." Hana murmured thoughtfully. "The price tag sucks, but it has some benefits."

"No, no, no." Naruto tssked. "You ain't listening. Benefits are nice and fine, but what happens when that bestial, mingling and verrrry inhumanly potent chakra meets puberty?" The blond took a sip of his sake. "Puberty pushed because the body matures as fast as it possibly can to handle the amount of power it gets from the constant workout Kyuubi's toxic energy provides it."

Hana's eyes widened, and the young woman blanched slowly as the realization dawned.

"...oh fuck me." She whispered finally, white as chalk.

"Yes. Exactly." Naruto said calmly. "And those two maids too."

She stared at him, dumbfounded.

"Inhuman stamina, remember?" Naruto smirked.

"Oh."

"As for what we're doing, it's easy." The blond smiled.

"We," a hot breath licked her ear, "are creating a legend."

Hana's eyes widened almost comically, saucer falling from her numb fingers only to be deftly caught by Naruto. The Inuzuka women whirled with panic to see Sasuke, naked as the day she was born (the irony didn't escape her, really), gracefully sliding into the water by Naruto's side.

"Oooh. Nice." Naruto's eyebrows rose as he peered at the naked woman. "Very nice indeed."

"I thought you'd say that." Sasuke-chan smiled, sliding next to Hana, causing the Inuzuka heiress to freeze.

"...wow." She murmured, eying the artful design on the phoenix she was sure wasn't there before this day. "Is it a tattoo?"

"A genjutsu/ninjutsu hybrid." Sasuke sighed. "It breaks on kai, though." She looked at Naruto.

"I might." The blond shrugged. "If you want to."

"I'll see about that. For now I prefer it more... natural." She smirked and the violet phoenix stretched its wings, the design enveloping Sasuke's firm breasts before sliding upwards, as if taking flight, and vanishing.

"Now that is just a spectacular waste of chakra if I ever saw one." Hana snorted. "It is cool, though."

Sasuke just smiled, in that serene-creepy way.

"I knew you were a good choice." The Uchiha heiress murmured, that 'off' smile going strong. "Oh yes."

"Whatever." Hana said, looking at the neo-girl oddly. "What is that 'legend' stuff about, though?"

"I told you, didn't I?" Sasuke accepted a saucer from Naruto. "Silk and satin sheets, champagne and sex, money and seduction - all connected, all loud and flashy and beyond decency. Sensual and shocking. For all of that, we need a Legend. Not just a cover story - but we need to them to see, to crave, to believe." The onyx eyes flashed, and for a moment, Hana had an instinctive desire to run. To stand up, board the first boat out of here and leave those two deviants behind but...

She swallowed.

But it was... exciting. Like a fairy tale. Like a...

'...legend.' Hana's eyes widened.

"Aaah. See it, you do!" Naruto smiled triumphantly. "Yeah. That's more like it, Yata-chan."

"So... that is why..." She said slowly. "Even in private..."

"Yes." Sasuke nodded, leaning to Hana. "You don't get to act - you have to live it or it will be shallow. Feel it. From here." She tapped her chest gently. "Craft it, feel Yata and her emotion, let her become more than just an illusion one could break. Allow her to laugh at a joke, cry when she is hurt and feel desire when she is tempted. Let her breathe. Let her live." Sasuke's hand traced the contour of her face. "Smile, Yata-chan. For this is your 'happy birthday'."

"...you... you are... insane..." Hana murmured, feeling oddly faint and weak, water and alcohol only amplifying the gentle trace of fire left by Sasuke's warm hand.

"You say it like it is a bad thing." Sasuke chuckled, a low, throaty sound. "Come with us, Yata-chan. Let us show you the sky and all the stars." The crimson of the sharingan flashed briefly. "They are only beautiful at night, you see."

"...what... are you... genjutsu...?" The Inuzuka heiress said weakly.

"No." Sasuke laughed. "There is nothing here that isn't yours already."

"It is a fairy tale, eh?" Naruto who was, to Hana's astonishment, still by her - meaning she really didn't move, even if it felt like she did - smirked. "Cover stories are so boring. If you have the story, why not use it? Let it go, and enjoy the ride. Drink and be merry, chikadee."

"For tomorrow is tomorrow, and we will know not when the day shall die." Sasuke chuckled. "Breathe it all in, enjoy life. We won't judge you. All we ask is for you to join us. Let us..." The featherlight touch slid over Hana's face. "If you don't want to, we won't make you. But is it so bad to live a legend? To grasp it with both hands, even if for a few nights?" The Uchiha heiress lips could have or could have not traced Hana's jaw - she wasn't sure given the dizzy spin on her senses and the state her mind was in.

The hot breath on her ear might have been one as well - she wasn't certain.

It shook her to the core, though. The clashing heat of the hotspring, the scent of alcohol and jasmine incense and Sasuke's perfume - sweet and spicy, so strong now that she could taste it on her tongue...

She couldn't think clearly like that.

And, to her astonishment, she didn't know if she wanted to.

"Smoke and mirrors, Yata-chan." Sasuke chuckled. "How about it, this little fairy tale of ours?"

Hana licked her lips. It was then that she realized they weren't dry - they couldn't be with the steam rising as it did, obscuring her already hazy vision, and the taste of the scent on her tongue, sweet and stark, spicy and misty - Sasuke to the extreme.

The Uchiha heiress smiled, sliding back almost bonelessly - like a snake, the dark mane trailing like silk over Hana's skin. It felt almost... painful to allow it to go. Her cheek felt so cold without that breath and silky smooth fire warming it as well...

The older Kunoichi swallowed, before closing her eyes and rubbing the bridge of her nose.

She was an Inuzuka. While many thought their clan feral (and not without a reason) they were far more honest with their emotions than most. Far more in touch with the wilder, more primal aspect of themselves as well.

'...well shit.'

Hana sighed, before blinking as she opened her eyes, slowly looking off to the side.

"I really hope that this is a piece of rock poking me." She said sweetly.

"Well, it is certainly as hard as one." Naruto smiled cheerfully.

Carefully, preferring not to check, Hana slid away that tiny bit.

Stopping right as she touched Sasuke's rather shapely breast.

The Uchiha quirked an eyebrow.

The Inuzuka heiress pinched the bridge of her nose.

"...I fucking can't win, can I?"

Sasuke-chan smiled serenely, patting the confused kunoichi on the back.

"There, there. Here, have a drink. It always makes things easier for people."

"Yeah. I just bet it loosens them up." Hana snarked.

"Well, it is one way out of the tight spots." Naruto grinned.

"Yes, sometimes you are just between the tight and the hard place." Sasuke nodded.

Hana just groaned.

"So." Kisame leaned on the wall, the black cloak folded over his shoulder because of the heat.

"There is no mistake." Itachi closed his eyes, feeling the mental drain ebbing away slowly. It was a cruel joke, that sharingan of his. The moment he achieved Mangekyo he knew it would slowly destroy his sight but he thought it would only happen when the Mangekyo was used. He was delighted to see his sharingan, as a whole, improved. The illusions especially - before, it was just a simplistic bit of genjutsu, but now it was a whole another realm of possibility.

The possibility he paid for daily, and would until he was blind.

"You didn't need to use that on the guy, you know?" The Kiri nukenin kicked the whimpering, shaking man for emphasis. "He's just a piece of shit, Itachi."

"But he was terrified." The Uchiha said calmly. "It is better that way."

"You're in a real hurry, huh?" The shark-faced man sighed. "You keep on pushin' yourself like that and you'll lose it all, ya know?"

Itachi said nothing, instead just reaching for his pocky supply.

"Yeah, yeah. We're doing it your way, as you wish." Kisame shrugged. "You're the boss, after all. Though I don't get your fascination with that broad. Even if she escaped that purge of yours... what's the point?"

"Madara... is too old." Itachi leaned back, closing his eyes. "He kept an eye on all Uchiha. And yet... of her he knew nothing."

Kisame frowned, tapping the hilt of Samehada idly.

"A renegade?"

"More." The sharingan master bit into another pocky stick almost viciously. "That thing this man saw... there is no mistaking it. It was the sharingan. He was terrified of it."

"Well, sharingan or not, I don't know." Kisame shrugged. "But Samehada went a little crazy here. So... whoever that 'demon guy' was, he was the real deal." The Kiri nukenin looked at his companion. "Though all bijuu are accounted for, right?"

"We shall see." Itachi's monotone didn't change, but there was a brief hitch that Kisame learned to recognize over the years of their partnership.

"Heh, seems like you're actually excited, Itachi." The shark man chuckled. "I don't blame you. It might be fun."

The Uchiha renegade remained silent.

"Though I have to admit, whoever it was..." Kisame kicked a nearby, blackened stone. "They had a helluva lot of power. The walls still all but vibrate with that shit." He tapped the wall, or rather the remains of one he was leaning on. "Well, whatever's left of it, anyway. Shame. I've been here back in the day. They had a really nice castle."

Itachi peered over the ruin, his sharingan spinning lazily, burning every bit of the burned out husk of the Sunflower castle into memory.

"Really?" He said with a faint smile. "I think it looks better now."

Kisame looked at his companion oddly, before shaking his head.

Itachi was weird like that some days, but also interesting. To be honest, it was the main reason Kisame, a fresh nukenin, agreed to take the job given to him by a creepy, monotone-speaking kid with a thousand yard stare, way back then. Besides, how many times in his life did he have a chance to go against an organization older than his village and filled to the brim with S-class maniacs like himself? And getting paid a downright absurd amount of money for it as well?

"Why is that undead gramps of yours so set on finding her?"

"Ally. Obstacle. Both. Neither." Itachi shrugged faintly. "She is a wrench in his plan either way."

"Oh yeah, that grand, mysterious and fairly stupid plan." Kisame rolled his eyes. "You know, for an over a century old undead fuck he's more or less a moron."

Itachi smiled faintly, saying nothing.

"So, any idea where they went?"

"Coral." Itachi stood up. "That man certainly seemed to think so."

"Coral... man, that's far, but given the time they are already there." Kisame frowned, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. "We might miss them even if we hurry."

"We won't." Itachi turned on his heel, walking away, Kisame following. "It is all taken care of."

The shaking man opened his mouth to scream, only to stiffen, blood pouring from his lips and ears, before convulsing and becoming still for the last time.

The two cloaked men melted into the night seamlessly, vanishing.

The smoke coiled like a living being, not quite separate, but also not entirely one with the heavy atmosphere.

It was a dive - or at least it seemed like that at first glance. Solid wooden tables, too heavy to lift (by civilians anyway), sparse lighting save for the few tables, patrons who didn't take kindly to sitting by them - or even near them.

Hana knew those well by now considering last three days had been spent cruising a variety of dens like this, some better, some worse - some actually decent as far as she was concerned.

"Fifty."

"Fifty. Ten."

"I hear that, and raise you bastards double that."

"The same."

There were no chips here, like in one of those posh casinos they hit the first day. When Naruto told her he wanted private games for hard cash, she envisioned doing a round or two of the casinos, and then buying in, or being invited into some posh, high-brow game.

Instead the blond and the Uchiha made a whole show out of several rather spectacular wins, culminating with almost being thrown out of one of the most expensive resorts holding the casino frequented by people who probably saw more money in a day than she made in a year. Then they toned down the clothes, grabbed the pipes and the cash Naruto won and hit the downtown.

'Hit would be appropriate.' Hana winced internally, remembering the first dive they visited. The patrons were quiet, hard-eyed men and women who didn't take too kindly to a spoiled brat hitting them for hard cash, and decided to hit back. The bodies left in the gutter just beside the tavern were alive. Or so she hoped.

Sasuke made quite a show of breaking every bone in any limb that so much as moved in their direction wrong, Naruto giggled, ostensibly drunk out of his mind, and Hana tried not to bat an eye at the excessive and quite gleeful brutality.

She was a shinobi, yes - but she was a professional. Violence didn't disturb her, but the giggly glee Sasuke displayed doing it most certainly did. Mostly because she had no idea how much of it was faked and how much was Sasuke. She still didn't. It was even harder now after all that, in fact.

Naruto could play the loud, devil-may-care noble looking for thrills well - truthfully, Hana didn't know if he needed to play that up at all considering his attitude. Sasuke, on the other hand, worried her. Given the disturbing but undeniably proud attitude the Uchiha displayed could she be actually counted on to reign her arrogance in?

Hana leaned back, hiding a small smile behind the saucer of sake as she saw Sasuke's hand sliding down Naruto's back as she leaned, playing with the strands of golden hair.

There was no worry of that now. The freak was like some goddamn chameleon, at the same time blending into the background consisting of those women in a tad too loud make up and cheap, garish dresses showing far too much skin, while standing out just enough to act as an excellent smoke screen, drawing the stares and provoking the idiots into proving they were 'man enough'.

The Inuzuka restrained herself from smoothing out the dress she had to bring the skimpy cloth a little lower, to no avail. The slit on the thigh made it flat out impossible. Hell, the daring dress was bad enough without taking its tightness into account. She shifted a little, only to pause as she noticed several men in nearby tables following her chest with obvious interest.

'...I'll kill those perverts.'

She honestly didn't know if she was thinking about the freak duo, or about the trash filling the bar.

"One hundred and fifty." Naruto's voice was bored, as he casually slugged another wad of cash down.

"The same and another hundred for a good measure." The man in front of the jinchuuriki smiled, leaning back and putting out the cigar he had been smoking, only to calmly draw another.

Hana grimaced. The odd, bluish smoke was almost choking her - while it was far unpleasant, having a strangely spicy, almost herbal scent - it was incredibly strong and played havoc with her sense of smell something fierce. And the slim blond didn't seem to stop smoking them, one after another, seemingly endlessly.

A dusky hand sneaked around the blond's neck, a woman in a tight cheongsam sliding slightly up from her usual lazy position on the blond gambler, her fingers touching the tip of the cigar, which lit up in the dinky room.

The blond, his off-gray, high-collared jacket open, displaying something silvery under it, smiled, taking a long drag with obvious relish.

"A hot woman, gentlemen. What can I say?" He said, voice smooth, with that odd, 'washed out' accent that could be Fire Country or Snow, for all she knew. Precise and measured but impossible to get a fix on. Though it was nice, she decided, very smooth and pleasant.

The dusky skinned beauty chuckled, her golden eyes almost glowing in the dim light.

"You're playing with fire." She purred, leaning back just enough to grind her body into his slowly.

"That's the only way to play." The sandy blond said pleasantly, straightening his cards. "If I didn't want to ride the lightning, I'd never have picked you."

The golden eyed woman chuckled, biting the blond's ear gently.

Hana blinked at the tiny droplet of blood that vanished as fast as it appeared thanks to the violet haired woman's dexterous tongue.

The blond was unphased, only quirking an eyebrow.

"Play nice, Setsuna." He said softly. "Gentlemen?"

The two other gamblers looked at the table, before the younger of them - a tall, gangly man in is late twenties - slammed the cards down.

"What's the fucking point?" He muttered bitterly. "It's gonna be the same either way with you bastards." He showed himself out of the table. "I'm out."

The older man, whose creased face saw at least sixty years - and Hana would bet most of them spent in combat considering how he carried himself - puffed on his pipe thoughtfully before sighing.

"While I don't feel as... strongly as our young friend there did, I must admit it is getting slightly too costly for me." He folded the cards neatly, before putting them on the table calmly. "Also... however angry, the young man does have a point." The old ninja sighed, standing up with a warrior's grace, despite his obvious age. "You have to excuse this old man, but I don't want to be the latest in a long line of dirt-poor losers crumbling while our two youthful pillars keep on standing. Farewell, gentlemen." He bowed to the table before grabbing a cane and walking away among the mutters.

Hana hid her wince by rising her saucer and taking a tiny sip.

The old man hit it dead on. The 'game' - if it could be called that - started early, mostly as a distraction after their 'visit' to one of the seedier, yak-ran casinos by the docks. Naruto's purse was overflowing, Sasuke was complaining about blood under her nails and Hana tried to restrain an urge to grab a bottle and forget the fact they left the establishment short two dealers(who were crooked) and the manager shorter his head, after Sasuke - gods knowing how - brought the fact the man was rigging all games to the local oyabun.

Which she apparently managed to find in ten minutes, complete with getting a personal audience. Hana preferred not to think about 'whys' and 'hows' - 'hows' especially.

Still, if there was one good thing coming out of the whole mess (aside from a nice pot taken by Naruto regardless of the rigged game - the perv was good, damn him) it was the fact no one so much as dared to question their presence downtown anymore.

Once again it was proven that the rumor was the fastest thing on earth, bar none. Especially if it was less of a rumor, and more like a warning from a very pissed off yakuza godfather.

The 'thank you' banquet - even if an unofficial one - was a long, drawn out affair showing off a level of hospitality a daimyo would envy. Hana pretended not to see the way Sasuke, shameless as always, had the old oyabun eating out of the palm of her hand. If they stayed there a wee bit longer the old man would probably adopt her straight out, he was so charmed.

'Though the fact Naruto gave him 'tips' on running gambling business might have something do do with it all.' Hana thought feeling the impending headache.

Still, the little 'distraction' grew into a serious game quite unexpectedly. Naruto, as per his modus operandi, cleaned out the local sharks in thirty minutes flat. But then the irresistible force, it seemed, met the unmovable object.

Said unmovable object sat now calmly by the table, smoking the strange, blue-smoked cigars and proving he not only had very deep pockets, managing to meet and raise every bid Naruto felt like making, but also the disturbing ability to meet the blond half-way.

It was unreal to be honest. Neither had won so far - not decisively anyway. One hand went that way, the other another - the very moment they decided to go deep and bid more, it always ended half-way. Sometimes Naruto won, sometimes the other blond did, but after Hana did some careful counting she realized that the overall balance was completely, ideally zero.

After over five hours of play.

Not to mention, the long hours made sure Sasuke was bored.

Then the violet haired kunoichi saw fit to lean on her blond companion, massaging his shoulders lazily.

Sasuke, to Hana's horror, found a new source of amusement.

Worse. Sasuke - the goddamn deviant - saw a challenge.

It took all Hana had not to whimper as Sasuke-chan licked her lips, leaning onto Naruto.

Only that dress - that damnable dress - had a decency to slide a bit. A bit but enough. Considering the neo-girl didn't wear a bra...

And then the dusky skinned woman's eyebrows rose up, eyes glinting with mirth.

That was three hours ago.

Since then Hana grew basically desensitized. Because between the secretive smiles, tiny rubs, licks, disheveled dresses and shared suggestive comments, sex would be a formality given the amount of raw lust and innuendo floating around that table. Not to mention the pheromones her nose could smell just fine, given the sheer amount of it all in the air.

She was frankly impressed that neither of them decided to fuck it all and go straight into screwing their partners senseless, given what the two women in question were doing.

The Inuzuka heiress fervently thanked every god, demon and spirit in existence for Sasuke's freaky sense of pride - otherwise that deviant just might drag her into it as well. Which was - to her utter embarrassment - both fucking scary and damn exhilarating to think about at the same time.

Considering some of the crowd watching by thinned, the provocatively dressed women and patrons vanishing in the rooms upstairs as the atmosphere thickened, she wasn't the only one feeling it.

Hana shivered slightly, trying to look like she didn't. There was a faint, yet lingering... essence. Something that made the warm molasses of pleasure envelop her senses, spilling that lazy, sensual rhythm down to her bones.

She had no idea if it was the fact she didn't get any for months, or the fact the deviant didn't know the word 'restraint' if it tied her-

Hana blinked, before groaning at the train of thought.

'I hate them. So. fucking. hate. them.'

"Call."

"This is going nowhere, ain't it?" Naruto said thoughtfully putting down the two pairs.

"Considering we went through everything starting with poker and ending at it again, I'm inclined to agree." The sandy-haired man smiled faintly, showing his slightly lower two pairs. "We're on zero balance once again, by the way."

The jinchuuriki quirked an eyebrow.

"Damn, but you're counting fast." He said with a chuckle.

"Counting money is something of a specialty of mine." The taller blond smirked, while the woman on his lap guffawed, before breaking into a laughter. "What?" He blinked innocently. "It's true."

The violet haired kunoichi just shook her head, chuckling and whispering something into the man's ear.

"...oh... really?" The white-clad man said with obvious interest. "That's... some specialty."

"I know." The dusky skinned kunoichi smirked.

"You really don't need to tell me." Naruto said calmly, putting out his own cigar.

"Well, considering you already know it, that's kind of obvious." Sasuke-chan said matter-of-factly.

Naruto blinked, while Hana just pinched the bridge of her nose.

"So... given we are five hours on it already..." Naruto rubbed his chin. "Fifty-fifty?"

"That would be the most obvious solution, yeah." The other man nodded. "Besides, even if we wanted to continue," he winced slightly as the woman on his lap bit him.

"Now that's some sharp thinking." Naruto said with a smirk.

"Pointy arguments, my friend." The other blond rolled his eyes.

"Seesh!" The violet haired woman snorted. "Man, you two are lame."

"Considering you married me, who's lamer?" The sandy blond grinned at her.

"That was pity, idiot." The kunoichi poked the white-clad gambler's chest. "Get it straight."

"Yes, yes, o great Setsuna-sama." The man chuckled. "I shall endeavor to remember."

"Of course you will." The dusky skinned woman said sagely. "This body is unforgettable, hmm?"

Hana blinked owlishly.

'Somehow... this seems... familiar.' She thought, eyes wide.

"You're good." Naruto shook the sandy-blond man's hand. "Been a while since anyone gave me a decent challenge."

"Likewise." The other man chuckled. "I don't remember losing so many times in one game in my life. I have to admit, while I wouldn't want to repeat it, it was... interesting."

"Yeah, reminder you too are mortal and all." Naruto nodded with a smirk.

"Something like that, yes." The white-clad man said with an odd smile.

The two women, in turn, shared a look, rising their respective eyebrows, before sharing a decidedly wicked smirk and a nod that was halfway between a bow and some odd acknowledgment.

The two blonds leaned forward, deftly splitting the pot between themselves only to pause as the crowd's murmurs rose, before cutting in half rapidly.

"I don't think so."

The two players shared a look, before turning to the source.

The gangly young man who stormed away from the table was standing in the middle of the bar, surrounded by a large number of similar young thugs. Each of them had hard, greedy eyes and swagger born out of cocksure belief in the knives and swords they carried.

"You think you two rich pieces of shit can play us for idiots and leave with our money?" The man sneered.

"Your money?" Naruto quirked an eyebrow. "We won it fair and square."

"Don't take me for an idiot, you rich pansy." The young man spat on the ground. "No one wins like that. NO ONE. And the only time you two shits were losing was to each other, after you both waltz in the docks at the same time? How stupid do you think we are?!"

"Very, actually, if you think you can take anything that belongs to me." The voice was smooth, but cold. There was no killer intent in it but its chilly quality was more than enough to act like a verbal whip, shutting some of the louder thugs up right away. The sandy haired man was standing calmly, relaxed, not a muscle tense.

His blue eyes were like frozen lakes, taking in every wannabe criminal with chilly detachment and dismissing them out of hand with dispassionate contempt one would show a bug.

"You piece of shit!" The gangly man reddened. "You think you can just come in here and insult me like that?!" The gangster drew his sword wildly, "I'm gonna kill you!"

"Jiro... don't be a fool."

The gangly man turned to the corner, sneering at the old shinobi who was one of the players before, now sipping a drink calmly.

"Stay out of this, old man!" He snapped, though there was some odd care in his words, despite the bluster. "It is none of your business, they ain't local! I'm taking what's mine, that's all!"

"I am not the one you need to worry about, brat." The gray haired shinobi took a sip of sake.

"You think I am scared of two rich pansies, eh?!" Jiro laughed derisively. "Man, you need to have your eyes checked, gramps!"

The shinobi paused, cocking an eyebrow and Jiro stiffened, taking a cautious step back.

The old man swirled his sake calmly, before draining the saucer and pouring himself another one. "Walk away, Jiro."

"That an order, geezer?" The man sneered.

The older shinobi just sighed, shaking his head.

"Goodbye, Jiro." He said calmly.

"...fucking antique." The younger man muttered, before turning to the table, eyes narrowing. "Now, you rich fuck, what were you sayin'?"

"Short memory and retardation?" The sandy-haired man said mockingly. "You are really out of luck, aren't you? Your mother must be so sad."

The young man paled, before rising his sword with a snarl, only to halt abruptly.

"You're boring."

A loud gurgle was all that managed to escape Jiro's throat before his body and head came apart at the neck, falling in two separate directions.

Setsuna stretched languidly, the blade of the jian moving with the same serpentine, sensuous grace her body did.

"I don't like boring things." The kunoichi said blandly.

"...that... that..." One of the thugs swallowed, looking at the headless corpse. "They killed Jiro!"

"Those bastards!" Screamed another.

"I say we-" Whatever was to be said, stopped mid-sentence, as the almost two-meter tall man fell down, a crossbow bolt in his skull.

The crowd fell silent once again, the eyes traveling towards the white clad man, who was puffing on his cigar calmly, two crossbows in his hands.

"Now I know what you're thinking." He said, his voice smooth. "You are thinking 'He just shot a bolt, he only has one other left'. But that is still one more bolt you can't duck. One of you will be hit. Maybe it will be you, maybe it will be your neighbor - all depending on your luck."

The sandy haired man smiled pleasantly, though the faint undertone of menace was anything but.

"Now, the question you want to ask yourselves is, do I feel lucky?" The eyes weren't cold anymore, but almost gleeful, and terrifyingly clear. For a moment, one could almost feel the tension rising steadily in the group of thugs as they gazed at the crossbow as if entranced.

"Well?" The silky voice resounded in the suddenly deathly silent bar. "Do you?"

The crowd wavered.

A moment later, all anyone could hear was a rushed steps and sounds of steel hitting the floor as the wannabe gangsters vacated the premises, leaving behind two corpses and a lot of third rate weapons.

The old shinobi in the corner shook his head.

"Youngsters these days." He murmured, taking a sip of sake. "So excitable."

It was ironic, but the two strongest bijuu (out of those sealed into humans anyway) had the most combat-useless abilities of them all.

Shukaku, the weakest, one-tail, pink-elephant-seeing stone cold crazy tanuki could become a living desert and a giant sandbox rolled into one, down to the levitating sand. How exactly that worked, no one really knew (aside from five people - one of whom was alive currently and didn't feel like sharing) but work it did.

Sanbi, for being a total, complete, utter moron could spam tsunamis (out of thin air, more or less, simply by liquefying the moisture in the surroundings) that made S-class ninjutsu of Kiri look like puddles, while Yonbi's earth manipulation abilities made Doton masters of Iwa cry.

Most of those abilities, however reduced and transformed, transferred to their hosts - either directly or not. For Gaara, the Suna's jinchuuriki it was his infamous 'ultimate defense', for Yonbi's host it was the downright absurd hardiness of body and bones.

One would think that for the two strongest bijuu - one by virtue of actually liking her host and working with her instead of sincerely wishing to eat her, the other simply because it was nine tails and was just that fucking absurdly powerful period - the 'extras' should be immense, deadly and overpowered on a level that made Mangekyo Sharingan look tame.

One would be very wrong.

Uzumaki Naruto, the jinchuuriki of Kyuubi no Kitsune (or Yoko, or Youkai - depending on who said, what they said and what they knew), the bijuu that could cause tsunami with its tails, rip earth asunder with a flick its paws and set entire forests on fire with one swipe of its claws had precisely one 'ability' from his unwilling tenant.

Well, not counting the animalistically keener senses, stamina and other minor additions that were, more or less, shared by all jinchuuriki and had more to do with the side effects of sealing or mingling chakra than anything else.

He couldn't, despite being apparently of kitsune stock, set things on fire with his eyes. He couldn't manipulate elements in ways that defied descriptions or conventional ninjutsu knowledge. He couldn't cast grand illusions so accurate everybody and their dog thought they were real either.

Instead, the jinchuuriki of the greatest of bijuu could shape shift. Both shape, and - to his unending frustration courtesy of certain Uchiha - gender. And it was limited shape shifting, too, given he couldn't turn into animals or inanimate objects.

Of course, as Naruto discovered, the supposedly harmless ability was complete on a level that bordered on not just improbable, but outright impossible. To put it plainly, Naruto could be anyone, of any age, race or gender.

Missing those golden years of youth, lollipops and milk teeth? No problem - bam, you're six years old again. Feeling like hitting the town, and spending some time with the ladies of the night? Why, be my guest. Twenty five old enough? Want some stubble, maybe a different hair color, bigger muscles, or a scar or something? No problem. Feeling pretty? Say no more - from a blushing schoolgirl to a seductive femme fatale - with the MILF factor included as a bonus if you want it.

He could do it all, be it all. The sky was no longer the limit. And given the fact even things like his scent, presence, movement and chakra signature changed, one could easily see why Sasuke called the ability 'completely broken' with the blistering envy that led to the development of the walking headache that was Uchiha's 'gender is optional' attitude.

But then, as far as Naruto was concerned, Sasuke-chan was incredibly hot, so it made up for a lot. And the freakout factor was so fun to abuse, regardless how you went about it.

Nii Yugito had a similar problem.

Nibi wasn't a particularly powerful creature as far as bijuu went. She was fast, deadly and as dangerous as any other bijuu, but far from the most powerful of the nine.

However as far as Jinchuuriki went, Nibi's host was the most powerful among them (or second most powerful, to be exact but then Naruto was very hush hush and Kyuubi was fucking lazy). It wasn't because her seal was better, it wasn't because of the superior training. It wasn't also because of the fact that the Sandaime Raikage, in a rare influx of common sense, decided to treat the girl with a village-destroying demon in her stomach like a prized weapon should be, making sure Yugito grew up to be a surprisingly well adjusted, if a workaholic member of the community. Well, as far as a person who killed people for living could be. No.

It harkened back to the day when Yugito was a well provided-for but lonely child of six and was told of her role by the Sandaime. Yugito, from the day she could walk, was raised to be a shinobi. A calm, calculating, fairly dispassionate saboteur, bodyguard and assassin. Training areas were her playgrounds, the records of battles her fairy tales and weapons her toys while Sun Tzu was among her recreational reading.

Above that however, Yugito was, despite all the training and attention given to her by the instructors, a lonely six year old girl.

It was a very stupefied Nekomata who, coming into the direct mental contact with the host, instead of fear or desire for power, met a calm, wide-eyed girl who simply looked on with admiration and curiosity.

Yugito, it should be added, never had a pet - such silly things were distractions from the rather strict but reasonable regime designed to create a perfect shinobi. But like almost every girl, she had an affinity for all things soft and fluffy. At least she thought the nekomata was soft, fluffy and very petable.

Nibi actually was far from soft and fluffy, but she was a cat, and rather vain by definition. And her fur was rather fabulous, if she could say so herself.

It was the day that would live in infamy for decades to come. The day when the host, who was supposed to use and abuse the power, and the demon - who was supposed to snarl, threaten to eat and be a general nuisance before it ended the host's life prematurely due to the chakra poisoning - bonded.

Nibi never had kittens - she was a living manifestation of chakra, a 'souped up' nekomata so to speak and as such she didn't treat Yugito as one. Yugito never had a pet or family given she was an orphan, but it was easy to fall in the companionship with the spirit.

Nibi wasn't a 'distraction', she wouldn't be a spy from the enemy village, or an assassin or a fake friend sent to spy on her. Nibi would never leave, never betray - they lived and died together. Hell, the friendly Nibi was fully within the interest of Kumo and she was supposed to use every asset she had for the sake of the village, right? Where was the bad side to that?

On her side, Nibi found Yugito amusing and almost adorable. Besides, she was bored and cats need love too. Petting and fur-rubbing was an entirely new but thoroughly pleasurable experience she wanted more of.

At first unnoticeable, the effects started to be visible as Yugito grew older. It soon became apparent that Kumo's jinchuuriki could draw the power without risking going berserk or that the constant chakra backlash that made jinchuuriki live short, violent lives due to the side effects didn't seem to affect the host in the slightest.

If anything, Yugito was in perfect health even after healing serious injuries. The contamination of chakra didn't harm her, the rapid deterioration most jinchuuriki hit later in their lives due to the poisonous nature of the violent chakra wasn't present.

In fact, as jinchuuriki went, Yugito was a perfect specimen.

The Kumo seal-masters patted each other on the back, boasting of their talents and knowledge, coated in their puffed-up self importance. The only person not happy about it was the Raikage who only gave Yugito an unreadable look, his face impassive.

Still, for being the second-strongest of the jinchuuriki capable of drawing amounts of power which sheer volume left ninja around her gibbering wrecks, for a host to a bijuu who could apparently command fiery blazes of hell and make hordes of undead do her bidding, Yugito's flame aura could barely equal a B-rank katon jutsu if one squinted. Her second and far greater talent was, like Naruto's, completely useless for combat.

But where Naruto could shape shift depending on the situation, day of the week, or pure whim, Yugito had something vastly different in her kitten-themed bag of tricks.

"Crrrrrraaahggghhhh...!" The slobbering, smelly corpse rocked back and forth, trying to stand. "Crooaaaaaahhh!"

Yugito could talk to dead people.

"Crrrrggghhhhh...!" The recently risen corpse crowed again, almost sheepishly.

The blonde jinchuuriki's eyebrow twitched.

The ability, while creepy, didn't seem like all that useless at a first glance. Sure, she wouldn't be rising an army of undead creatures to do her bidding, nor would she raise some legendary dead shinobi to aid her in combat any time soon. But those who said dead men told no tales never met Nii Yugito.

"CroooooOOOO... guh?" The corpse slobbered, before attempting to blink.

However, as Yugito found out early on, allowing the body to be animated didn't solve the problems that ended its life. So a man who had his spine broken wouldn't walk, for example.

Yugito's eyebrow twitched again.

And someone whose innards - including his throat and lungs - were partially melted using some kind of highly corrosive acid wouldn't speak clearly either.

"Corrrrorrrrrhggguuu...?" The corpse groaned helplessly.

"I... hate overly thorough ninja." The blonde growled, the spikes of rage coupled with mental and physical exhaustion of the past week cracking the usually calm and professional facade.

"...crrooogghaaa?" The zombie craned its neck, looking at its distressed mistress.

The blonde's teeth gritted loudly, an angry, spiteful hiss escaping her throat.

The remains of the fortified walls, now nothing more than burned out shells of its former glory, fell apart ripped by the claws.

"Shut. Up." The woman growled.

"...cccrrrggccrooguha..." The air in the undead's halfway melted lungs escaped with a hiss, the corpse falling down as dead as a doornail again.

Yugito took a deep, drawn-out breath, using the familiar relaxation techniques taught to her by the Raiko monks so long ago. The outburst of destructive anger would cost her too much energy and while Nibi's power would keep her going, her mind needed rest. Tired shinobi made mistakes.

'Mistakes?' She had to resist an urge to laugh bitterly. 'This stopped being a mistake and turned into a goddamn catastrophe!'

The nekomata touched her host's mind gently, the familiar feeling of soft warmth enveloping Yugito from the inside out.

'Thank you.' The jinchuuriki closed her eyes, basking in the bijuu's presence with an almost guilty feeling of luxury. But then, there was no one to chide her for it now, was there? Not anymore.

The blonde reached into the inner pocket of a ragged coat she had stolen off a ruroni, her own clothes discarded long ago because they were both too distinctive and she would bet they contained a dozen different tracking seals.

Her fingers closed on the jagged slab of metal, caressing the Kumogakure symbol.

This one had the seals too, but she personally destroyed each of those simply by sending some supercharged chakra through them, though it left the metal rather mangled.

'Nothing but trash now...' Her lips quirked up in a mirthless smile, before turning into a grim line.

A strong squeeze later, the shards of metal were falling down to the ground.

Her weapons, her clothes and now... her hitai-ate.

Her whole life was like those shards now. Past, present and future. In pieces and beyond recovery.

'Future? You have no future, girl. That's it. You're done.' She snarked, the nekomata cooing softly at her partner's distress. 'I am sorry, my lovely. Forgive me. We are not alone, at least.'

The irises slitted, burning with gold.

'And together... those bastards who ruined my life... those bastards... we will make them pay!'

"Ahhh!" Naruto leaned back, a blissful expression on his face even as he put down the bowl. "Good Benten... this is the greatest of your blessings!"

Sasuke-chan chuckled, taking a bite from her cotton candy. Hana, her own cotton candy in hand, managed not to bat an eye at the fact the deviant managed to make it look both seductive and cute.

'Practice makes perfect.' She thought with a smirk, calmly licking her own snack before pausing.

Two pairs of eyes, Sasuke's dark and Naruto's blue ones, were.. smiling. She couldn't describe it any other way. They weren't looking in the same direction, even near her but there was the same touch of amusement in them - almost like one was some kind of weird Kage Bunshin of the other. Though for the life of her she couldn't say which was whose.

'Those eyes... are so... alike.' She thought absently, an odd light-headed feeling flooding her.

They were just... there. In the middle of the festival crowd, Naruto lazy from the countless bowls of ramen and all but laying on the table, Sasuke standing idly, leaning as she licked the cotton candy, words flowing in a banter that meant nothing and everything, with that strange feeling there was some hidden joke under all that innuendo and cheap puns.

They were there. Just there. In festive yukatas, touched with that 'smidgen' of overkill, standing in the middle of the gaudily dressed festival crowd, cotton candy and jokes, and those cheap 'catch the fish' games and-

And they stood out regardless. Just by being there. Rich and grand, almost to the point of absurd in their silks and over-the-top attitudes, as if they took a step out of a fairy tale, while at the same time more... more real than anything else around them, though she'd never know why.

Sasuke turned to her.

"Is something the matter?"

Under the raised eyebrow and innocent tone... the onyx eyes were laughing.

'I just want to know what the joke is.'

"Everything."

Hana blinked, looking at the blond who was sipping his sake.

"...what?"

The Uchiha laughed, a strange, smooth giggle that managed to sound dignified and carefree at the same time.

"Once upon a time, there was a great ninja." Sasuke licked her cotton candy languidly. "It was in a time where there were no villages and clans held the reigns of power in the world of shadows, when few not of the bloodline had a chance to become a ninja. Yet this man, a true prodigy of great talent, did. He fought in many battles, he mastered ancient techniques and became both feared and respected among his peers. Yet he vied not for the power, riches or glory like his comrades did. He was devoted to his art and aimed to truly understand it. Because of that he decided to learn the utmost secrets of it."

The Uchiha leaned back, sitting on the blond's lap and nestling herself comfortably while Naruto just snorted giving her a bit of sake. The girl refused a cup, instead calmly sipping it from his saucer like an overgrown cat.

"He soon realized that the lore was vast and decided that simply learning it all wouldn't be possible for a man in one life time. Therefore he meditated on the problem until he had found a solution. 'I shall learn the strongest, the most powerful and most sublime of them, for is it not the essence of the ninja?'. Deciding on the course of action he followed it with zeal.

Scouring the land for the most powerful of arts he found monks of the North, who were rumored to break the masters of arms with their bare hands, and learned their style.

His talent was great, his dedication even greater - soon, the monks called him their master and begged him to stay and take his rightful place. The man declined, for his journey was far from over.

Next he searched the shinobi world for the most perfect of ninjutsu. He encountered the clans of bloodline gifts, the monsters and spirits of power and men akin to gods who made the heavens tremble and he learned their secrets until he was even stronger than them.

"His legend grew so much every noble wanted his services and every ninja clan offered him daughters, riches and position - as many as he wanted, and as much as he wanted - just so he would stay with them. Yet he refused."

Sasuke's voice was smooth, warm and entrancing, compelling, spilling over Hana like honey.

"For he cared not for riches, honor or glory of the clans - as those he soon realized were just trappings of luxury. He cared not for morality and justice of the lords - for it was hollow and self absorbed. Determined more than ever, he moved on in his quest to find the last part of the puzzle.

He scoured the ancient halls, walked through battlefields, visited monasteries, bargained with demons and bartered with spirits in his search for understanding, meeting naught but despair. For while taijutsu could be judged by grace and efficiency, ninjutsu by power and effect, how was one to judge an illusion?"

The wheels of sharingan spun for a moment, as Sasuke smiled in that odd, almost inhumanly serene yet mischievous way she was occasionally prone to, which was - to Hana's amazement - creepier than all of her innuendo combined.

"Years passed and the despair set its claws deep into his heart at the fruitlessness of his quest. No monk could aid him, no onmyouji advise him, no ninja teach him and no spirit whisper the secrets sufficient enough to give him the prize he looked for. Dismayed, exhausted and bitter he came to a city of vice seeking to drown his sorrow in any way he could, seeking even a briefest of respites. And there he met a courtesan named Yuya.

She was an oiran, a woman of low station sold by her parents into the trade as a young girl and taught beauty and pleasure by shrewd eyed matrons of her tea house. While no exquisite beauty she was good at her job and her patrons felt naught but bliss in her arms, which she drew a measure of pride from. It was a small pride most would scoff at, but it was hers and she cherished it.

Therefore when the ninja came to her, bitter and drunk with both wine and disappointment, she took his coins and led him to her bed. But the ninja was inconsolable, still bemoaning his failure, only despair lingering in his heart. The courtesan's pride was small but strong. The ninja didn't want to share his burden but the oiran was determined and crafty."

Sasuke shrugged with a teasing grin, allowing the breasts to move a bit and there was no doubt what kind of 'crafty' she meant.

"When the ninja finally shared his great grief with her, the courtesan looked at him and laughed loudly. Enraged, shamed and bitter, the ninja threatened to take her life for mocking him. The courtesan just smiled and said 'If you do so, my lord, you will never learn the secret of the greatest illusion of all.' The ninja was confused. What could a whore, of all people, know of ninja arts?

But then he was tired and looked for years. So he relented and demanded the secret of her, lest he take her head and life with it. The oiran smiled serenely and told him she would share the secret but on one condition. For the three days, he was to follow her wishes without question or hesitation. The ninja agreed.

'If you have enemies I will cut them down. If you have oppressors I shall dispose of them. If you need treasures or gems of knowledge I can find them for you without fail.' he said.

The oiran nodded, and told him to be there the next day. When the sun rose the ninja was there with sword on his back and shuriken in his hand. The courtesan led him to a garden by the tea house. Confused, the ninja said nothing when she sat and bade him to look at the birds with her until afternoon. The ninja did as asked. As the noon passed she asked him to join her in a meal and ninja complied, passing the time with song, wine and music.

The very next day, when he came again, ready to do her bidding, weapons in hand, she asked him to follow her into the city. Thinking she needed a bodyguard, he walked behind her diligently while the courtesan spent the whole day buying the finest jade combs and picking the most beautiful kimono. The ninja followed her like a shadow as she went about her day until they came back to the tea house, where she bade him to eat with her once again.

When the third sunrise came, she bade him to join her in a song. The ninja was most distressed - he did not know how to sing. The courtesan laughed and bade him to sing regardless. His word was his honor and as such he did as ordered.

When the sun rose the next day the ninja demanded the secret, at which courtesan said nothing. Enraged, he decided to draw his sword, but despite the shame he experienced, he felt reluctant to do so. He tried to unleash one of his countless mighty ninjutsu at the smiling woman, but the techniques seemed to fade before they were even cast. Helplessly torn between shame, despair and reluctance, the ninja stood before the kneeling woman."

Sasuke ripped a tiny bit of cotton candy and leaned back, sharing some with Naruto with a strange smirk.

"Yuya smiled knowingly to the ninja. 'This, my lord, is the greatest, the most sublime illusion of them all and its secret.' she said softly. And the ninja was enlightened."

Sasuke slid off Naruto's lap in a sinuous move, reaching for the next stick wrapped in cotton candy idly, while Naruto got up, tapping his hand on the table, before bowing and turning away.

Hana blinked, falling into step, before halting at a strange, choked sound behind her.

The ramen girl was staring, in sheer disbelief as her table was slowly filling with gold, the whirling coin that Naruto left dancing on the table seemingly multiplying until there was a small fortune, while the cotton-candy man stood by his stall, a blank smile on his face, giving away the snack to people without collecting pay.

The older kunoichi's eyes widened, as she looked at Sasuke, who smiled serenely, licking her snack.

"You can't just..." Hana murmured carefully as she stepped closer than most would think appropriate.

"He gazed upon me, that was his pay." The younger kunoichi said calmly.

"And what a pay it was." Naruto murmured with a chuckle, a large golden coin dancing on his knuckles with abandon.

The Inuzuka woman looked at the duo, following them as they glided slowly through the crowd without paying attention. The coin danced - sometimes ending up on a table as a snack was bought here or there and mysteriously appearing in Sasuke's hand - then reappearing on Naruto's knuckles but leaving several of its sisters behind.

Absently, Hana nibbled on the cotton candy before slowly, deliberately taking a large bite and letting the overly sweet treat melt on her tongue. Her sharp senses drew in the combined spicy scent, interwoven with whiffs of salt water, musk and something deep and elusively sweet as it combined with the scents of various snacks and treats from the stalls they passed.

Combining, but never too much. Always standing out but blending for a few moments when something was taken, eaten or bought, before overwhelming that new scent again until it was just a bit of background flavor, only enhancing what was there before.

'Standing out, always standing out. As arrogant as the both of them.' She thought with wry amusement.

"What are you people...?" She murmured, almost too softly to carry over the noise of the festival.

Not softly enough not to be heard, apparently, as Naruto and Sasuke stopped, turning to her.

"Every fairy tale needs a happy ending, a 'happy ever after', where the hero and the heroine get together, right?" The blond grinned. "Or it isn't much of one."

Hana looked at the laughing jinchuuriki in confusion.

Sasuke smiled, leaning forward to take a bit of Hana's cotton candy, sharing half of the strand with Naruto absently. The Uchiha heiress licked her fingers off the sweet residue cheerfully, uncaring of the scandalized murmurs of the cultured women and disapproving matrons.

Sasuke quirked an eyebrow at them, her stare mocking and challenging and the women turned away hastily, the soft murmurs cut, leaving nothing but haughty stares filled with disapproval and... envy?

Sasuke laughed, causing the women around her to scramble nervously away, like children caught with their hands in a cookie jar.

"Isn't it obvious?" Sasuke winked at Hana, licking off the last strand of the sweet treat off her fingers with obvious relish. "We are simply Yuya's children."

Laughing softly the kunoichi turned, sashaying away, arm in arm with Naruto. Hana stood there for a long moment, a thoughtful look on her face before following, taking bites of her cotton candy absently, the crowd closing behind her until she too was gone.

The fireworks overhead exploded overhead, the reflection reddish hue catching the lazily spinning wheels of sharingan among a small patch of black.

Then, like the fireworks, they were gone again as the sky cleared.

"Haaah." Sasuke-chan sighed, leaning to the edge of the roof. "And there they go... hmm?"

"Damn." Naruto frowned, putting the bottle he had been drinking from down so hard it almost cracked on the tiles. "I didn't want to believe it but... those bastards... what are they doing here?"

"Now that is an interesting question." The kunoichi sat next to the blond, frowning thoughtfully as they peered down at the crowd. "They shouldn't be here. Not even near, not now."

"Tell me something I don't know." The blond said sourly. "Itachi and Kisame, to boot... shit."

"They aren't even bothering to hide... or downplay their presence." Sasuke murmured thoughtfully. It might seem strange to think of two cloaked individuals, especially Kisame, 'hiding' but Itachi never wanted to rise unneeded attention, so there was a small bit of genjutsu to encourage people not to pay attention to the two Akatsuki members courtesy of the renegade Uchiha. Usually, at least.

"Hide?" Naruto snorted. "Have you felt that? That blasted shark... he doesn't even bother with holding the Samehada back at all. He all but fucking announces their presence."

"Announce... hmm. You might be onto something." The Uchiha said with a frown.

Naruto pondered Sasuke's words for a moment, before looking at his companion.

"They are playing bait." He said with a sigh. "Damn it. I'd really like to call it a coincidence but..."

Sasuke smirked.

"Yeah, yeah." Naruto grumbled. "So I am an optimist, sue me."

"They aren't looking for 'us' us especially, but..." The Uchiha shrugged.

"The Vampire Princess and the Demon." The blond groused. "Damn... I knew it was a bad idea."

"Oh come on." Sasuke rolled her eyes. "You had fun and you know it. You've been just itching to do that since we've stolen the Raikage's tower."

"Well, there is that." The jinchuuriki chuckled. "Though... I think they are here for you more than for me, if anything."

"The perils of being so drop dead sexy and desirable I guess." Sasuke sighed theatrically. "They can't help but crave my most gorgeous, unrivaled presence in their dreary and empty lives ohohohohoho!" She covered her mouth with one of the silver fans. "Didn't you get so lucky to be allowed in the presence of such sublime beauty and perfection on the constant basis?"

"I'll set getting lucky for later." Naruto said rolling his eyes. "We have two annoyances to take care of now."

"No truer words." Sasuke chuckled, turning on her heel, before pausing. "You do know I'll be holding you to that, right?"

"Huh?" Naruto blinked. "What are you...?" His eyes widened a fraction.

Sasuke smirked, vanishing in a swirl of shunshin, a card floating down gently into Naruto's palm.

"'Point for me, dead last. Again.'?" He read aloud, eyebrow twitching. "Oh for the love of...! That bitch has fucking business cards for that now?!"

"We can't engage them in the open."

The steps were calm, even and measured, the cloak of a subtle genjutsu encouraging the eyes to slide away just enough.

"That goes without saying." Sasuke idly slid her way along the stand's silk, capturing a white robe with no one being the wiser. "I would prefer not to engage with force at all, if possible."

"Itachi - yes. Kisame - no." Naruto idly juggled two separate links of his chain, his eyes sliding over the shops and stands constantly, not quite looking, but not quite dismissing as well. "Separation?"

"We need a proper battleground for that." The Uchiha pondered the white silk in her hands before throwing it to Naruto, the garment vanishing before it even touched him. "Ooh. Nice. You've gotten faster."

"Absorb set - maximum." The jinchuuriki said absently, sliding his palm over an armor smith's stand, leaving it two gauntlets lighter and a small pile of coins richer. "About the only good side to that thing, really."

Sasuke blinked, looking at her partner.

"You actually incorporated that?" She asked incredulously. "I thought-"

"It is not a full Box." The armor plates vanished from his hands as he stopped by another smith, peering over the selection. "Only a part."

"Still... that tech is dangerous." The kunoichi pointed out.

"Only in interference. I can handle it."

"Last time you said that I had to deal with your comatose ass for two weeks." Sasuke frowned. "Don't do it again."

"Is that worry I hear in your voice, princess?" Naruto said mockingly.

"And if it is?" The raven tressed beauty quirked an eyebrow.

"Don't worry, I have it all in hand. As I said, it is just a partial seal, nothing to worry about." He frowned, tapping one armor thoughtfully, before throwing it away, revealing a considerably bulkier matte black breastplate underneath. "Oooh. A skirmisher!"

"Ugly." Sasuke sniffed.

"Precisely." Naruto grinned, the armor vanishing under his hands with a soft hiss. "Will go well with the cloak."

The Uchiha frowned, looking at the empty armor stand for a moment.

"Just what are you planning?" She asked suspiciously.

"Shark cutlets?" The jichuuriki said innocently.

"Without the Arsenal and with your limitation right now?" She snorted. "He'll cut you apart, unless you go full out."

"Which I can't do, of course, given the self imposed limitations and the real ones, hmm?" Naruto grinned.

Sasuke grimaced.

"Do be so kind and do not use a 'self imposed rule' wording." she shuddered. "The flashbacks of Gai are... traumatizing."

"It is true, though." The blond chuckled. "We can't overplay our hand, or it all goes bust and our vacation would be... terminated."

"It is an option, though." The kunoichi shrugged.

"It is not an option." The blond cocked his head, eying several long, thin knives. "Strange design..." he murmured, before sliding his hand over them, prompting a hefty dozen to vanish leaving a pile of coins in their wake. "I don't know about you, but as things stand going renegade isn't in my plans."

"You're just lazy." Sasuke smirked. "Admit it."

"Ha!" The blond resumed the walk, leaving a befuddled and angry smith behind - anger that quickly turned into joyous disbelief as the man noticed the gold all but spilling over his stand.

"That 'ha' of yours really leaves me worried." Sasuke said suspiciously, following her partner.

"As well it should." Naruto smiled pleasantly. "Indeed, you know me well."

"Doesn't that just inspire my bottomless confidence." The woman's voice was fairly dripping with sarcasm. "It is one of those ideas, isn't it?"

"Doesn't change the fact it is a good one." The jinchuuriki said cheerfully.

"Your last 'good' idea ended with Anko the Magical Girl." Sasuke rolled her eyes.

"First off, she looked damn hot in that fuku." Naruto pointed out. "Besides, you can't really tell me that Orochimaru being offed by a big fucking pink heart wasn't amusing."

"Well... it was a bit funny, I have to admit." Sasuke admitted, her lips twitching despite her wishes. "The expression on his face was priceless."

"See? All kinds of benefits!" The jinchuuriki said cheerfully. "I mean, what can go wrong?"

Sasuke paused, staring at her friend in silence.

"What? WHAT?!" Naruto snapped, bristling.

"I retract my previous statement. Now I am worried." The kunoichi said flatly.

"Oh ye of little faith." The blond rolled his eyes. "Trust me, I know what I am doing."

"And that's exactly what worries me." Sasuke deadpanned.

"So, like it?" Naruto leaned back, taking a sip of sake.

"This is..." Sasuke blinked, walking slowly through the halfway ruined tori into a large structure of stone and wood, surprisingly well preserved despite its obvious age and occasional grass growing in between the rocks.

It was large, though not tall - more like sprawling all over a hill to the side of a city. The long stretch of steps leading to the building was, amazingly, almost intact reflecting the past majesty of the structure.

"It is... big. What the-" The kunoichi frowned, inspecting the ruined, yet still majestic structure. "It is a temple!"

"Gireihei Jinja." Naruto took a large swing off his bottle. "The Temple of the Honor Guard. A very, very old place, this."

"Gireihei...?" Sasuke repeated softly, turning slowly as she walked forward. "So those statues...?" She looked at one of many armed, life-sized statues of samurai standing in almost every point of the temple.

"Yeah." Naruto nodded, closing his eyes. "A few centuries back, before any of the villages, shinobi were given a mission by the daimyo from the mainland, to kill the young heir to the family who held these lands. The mission was simple. The kid had only a few guards, nothing worth being to concerned over." The blond chuckled. "Of course, things changed when the ninja sent died. The samurai turned out to be fucking hardcore to the point that before they died, they all but exterminated the shinobi clan set with the job. Which turned out to be pointless on the ninja's side, since the 'heir' was a decoy, and the real heir turned out to be a girl who was getting married to the diamyo's son and took over in a few months after the father of her husband suffered a 'heart attack'. Sometime after she built this to honor their sacrifice."

"Nice. But..." Sasuke eyed one of the surprisingly well preserved statues, using a quick jutsu to brush off the grime and dust revealing the bone-white armors and swords. "I can understand the color, but they are all the same."

"Ah, that's not one of the samurai." Naruto smiled. "That's a part of their army."

Sasuke quirked an eyebrow.

"Each of the survivors had been given titles, lands and an army to command. Those who died... well, the princess said that if they couldn't command soldiers in life, she'd give them ones to command in death."

"Oh." Sasuke nodded slowly. "Very fitting."

"Only halfway." Naruto drained his bottle, before balancing the empty clay container on his finger. "An army for a dead man is like an empty bottle for a drunk. Useless." He slammed his arm down, intent on crushing the bottle until the swift hand caught his wrist gently, the other snagging the container deftly.

"But... you can always pour something into the empty container." The Uchiha said softly, before smiling. "If it isn't broken, that is."

The jinchuuriki looked at her oddly, before laughing loudly.

"Sasuke, Sasuke, Sasuke...!" He grabbed the raven tressed beauty by the wrist, reversing the hold, and dragging her closer with a grin. "You find the oddest signs of nobility in the worst places."

"I found enough in you." She said with a smirk. "Didn't I?"

"All too true." The blond chuckled, a new bottle appearing in his hands. "Come, let us drink - for the empty bottles and the army of the dead!"

"I'd rather drink for the living." The brunette serenely, taking the bottle. "But that will do, I suppose."

"For the living..." Naruto blinked. "You know... that might not be such a bad idea." A speculative glimmer lit up in the cerulean eyes, only to fade and return after momentary contemplation. "Sasuke..." Naruto said slowly. "You are a fucking genius!"

"I know, but thank you none the less." The Uchiha smiled. "So..." She inspected the temple critically, sipping her sake as she slowly walked through the courtyard, the cherry blossom trees overgrowing the formerly orderly garden with lush overabundance. "This is our 'battleground'?"

"Of a sort." The jinchuuriki shrugged. "You don't need much of a stage for the weasel boy anyway."

"Not really." The kunoichi murmured thoughtfully. "Question is... how do you plan to handle Kisame as you are?"

"'Facing' him..." The blond grimaced. "The worst thing about that shark is that he can't be handled with brute force alone. Especially with Samehada."

"You said you can't overplay your hand as it is." She cocked her hand to the side. "Which is kind of hard, given Sunflower."

"Actually, it is quite the opposite." Naruto said with a grin. "We, however unknowingly, had sown enough of seeds and our little side trip to Zukotsu gave me an idea." With a snap of fingers, the black clothes settled on Naruto's shoulders, the cowl, sliding over his head. "Masking our presence is a lost cause. However... they came here looking for an ancient power. Why not let them find some?"

The raven tressed beauty stared at her partner, before throwing her head back, the melodious laugh resounding through the ancient temple.

"Thank you, thank you." The blond bowed with flourish, sweeping his cloak theatrically. "You are the most wonderful audience!"

Sasuke clapped, still chuckling as a veritable shower of roses falling at the blond's feet.

Naruto grabbed one rose, before throwing it back to Sasuke-chan, who grabbed it deftly, blinking as the supposed genjutsu turned out to be quite real.

"Oooh. Nice." She said sniffing the flower as the rest of her flowery genjutsu unraveled leaving bare ground.

Sasuke tucked the flower in her hair with a small smile.

"Thank you."

Naruto made an exaggerated courtly bow using his cloak to sweep the ground in a grand fashion.

"Still... how do you want to handle Kisame without drawing deeply into Kyuubi's chakra?"

"Facing him with brute force, even if he is a clone, is a stupid idea. At least now." The blond paused, frowning. "Okay, ever. That guy is a freak of nature, and doubly so with that sword of his. However!" One finger rose pointedly. "Remove the sword... or at least its ability, and suddenly the odds change quite a bit."

"Oh?" Sasuke sat on one of the walls. "And how do you figure?"

"I spent far less time facing Kisame than you facing Itachi - for obvious reasons really - but I did fight him a few times." The blond rubbed his chin. "That guy is... specific. He has a huge chakra capacity, but he is used to Samehada taking care of the drain for his jutsu. Part of his tactic is to shield from damage by intercepting his opponent's chakra. He is so used to it he relies on it without noticing he does. Which is actually a sound tactic given he can't really be bereft of the sword. So, taking it away is out. But!" Naruto smirked. "What if you take away its main advantage?"

"That still leaves you with a big sword and a guy capable of flooding a small town in seconds." Sasuke said pleasantly.

"Yeah, well. There are ways around it." The blond said with irritation.

"Aside from overpowering him, stuffing him with explosive notes, siccing your pet projects on him?" Sasuke quirked an eyebrow. "Well, yes - several. But given we lack the resources or conditioning... I don't see how you can take him without an army, Naruto."

"Well ha fucking ha." Naruto rolled his eyes. "At least you will be using just your genjutsu instead of going against the human flood. So stop being so smug."

"Why won't you simply use Keisei on him?" Sasuke said curiously. "I've seen what she is capable of when you take off the limiters. With his Suiton countered, you could take him. You know enough of his weaknesses to surprise him."

"Keisei is out of the question." Naruto shook his head. "For one, I left her covering Hana and our kage bunshin if something happens - for two, if someone makes the connection, the whole charade goes down and we're back to square one. I didn't intend my vacation to turn into a 'let's train like crazy to stomp the Akatsuki' fest, thank you verymuch." He glared. "I won't even bother mentioning stuff like the Root, Iwa, our mutual snake friend and all that mess. And let's not even start on Sarutobi and his paranoid idiots club."

"Feh. We can take them." Sasuke huffed.

"Yeah, sure we can." Naruto rolled his eyes. "And then our rose-colored vacation time goes bye-bye. Yeah. Fucking great idea there, bitch. No. We're sending them on a wild goose chase and party our way to bliss watching as they run around like headless chickens."

"Hey, no complaints from me." Sasuke-chan shrugged. "But that still leaves a question how are you going to face Kisame without drawing on Kyuubi and with so few toys?"

"An excellent question, Sasuke-chan!" Naruto grinned, glint lighting the cerulean eyes that Sasuke knew all too well. "Now, I can't 'cut' Samehada's drain ability. However all I really need is to prevent him from draining chakra from me, since I won't be using any jutsu so..." with a snap and a hiss a familiar hilt appeared in Naruto's hand. "I need something to allow me that."

"The Raijin copy?" Sasuke blinked.