"If a woman expresses her love to a man, and the man flatly rejects her, leading her to do some extreme things—is it the man's fault or the woman's fault?"
The young girl with shoulder-length hair and inner highlights was shocked by the sudden question. After thinking for a moment, she replied somewhat weakly: "That should be... the woman's fault, right?"
After all, feelings can't be forced; it's about mutual consent. It's normal for a man to choose to accept or reject. At most, his emotional intelligence might be a bit low if he rejects her too harshly and hurts her feelings... but that's not the man's responsibility.
Ultimately, if a person is liked unilaterally, it would be too exhausting if they had to carefully consider the feelings of everyone who likes them.
"..."
"Um... Senior Lin, why are you asking this? Ah! Of course, it's fine if you don't want to ans—"
"It's nothing."
The boy wearing a hoodie leaned against the car window. His dark pupils watched the changing scenery outside. He pursed his lips and pulled up his collar.
"A friend of mine encountered a similar situation recently. I'm asking for him."
"Oh..."
Yama still felt a bit of joy in her heart.
Usually, she and Lin were like people from two different worlds. She was a grade below him, and they had almost no interaction. All she could do was brush past him in the hallway. She hadn't expected that for this school-organized spring trip, Lin class and her class would be assigned to the same bus—and that Lin would sit next to her and take the initiative to talk.
Although the content of the conversation was a bit strange—it felt a bit like he was "pointing at the mulberry to revile the locust"—at least they had spoken a few words, hadn't they?
With a good start, Yama began to look forward to this spring outing.
Lin leaned against the window, feeling slightly fatigued. He glanced at the bite marks on his collarbone and neck beneath his collar, then pulled the collar up further, intending to close his eyes and rest for a while.
He was planning to get married.
...Explaining it so abruptly might seem bizarre, like the beginning of Romance of the Three Kingdoms where the first sentence after the overview of the world's situation is about Zhuge Liang leaving the mountains. But that was the reality. Even if Zhuge Liang didn't want to leave, Liu Bei had already hacked down his door with an axe.
At the time, he hadn't noticed Anna's feelings. Even if the junior girl next to him said it was the woman's fault, Lin felt there might have been a reason involving his lack of tact.
By now, it was a bit late to say anything. The girl who used to call him "Uncle" had finally calmed down and let him out, even obediently admitting her mistake and offering to take full responsibility.
Lin had two choices at the time... either way, it didn't matter anymore. The final result was that he started dating Anna, with plans for the two of them to marry after getting into university.
It was just that after Anna received "approval," she became even more "unstoppable"... in two senses of the word. She had worn him out, so much so that he hadn't slept well last night, and she had added quite a few "marks" to his body.
People always mature at mysterious times. Lin believed he had indeed been too immature before—willful, eccentric, and solitary. Since he had decided to start a family, he should be more mature in the future. Don't people often say marriage can change a person? Then his turning point should be arriving soon.
"Senior Lin..."
"...Is something the matter?"
The hesitating girl used an extremely soft voice to try and get his attention; one might miss it if not listening closely. But to her surprise, Lin opened his eyes immediately and stared straight at her.
Speaking of which, did he know this girl? Why did she know his name?
Lin level of low-profile at school was lower than an ant hole next to a podium. Probably even the teachers who taught his classes didn't know he was there. His grades were always exactly at the median. His seat was in the second-to-last row on the right by the window. He didn't daydream in class and didn't fool around during breaks. He just frequently wore a hat, but... even with the hat, no one noticed him.
So, Lin was somewhat confused that the girl could call out his name directly.
"Nothing, I just wanted to find someone to talk to. The bus is too boring... Ah! If you don't want to talk, that's okay too!"
Chatting?
If it were the old Lin, he would have strictly refused before she reached the fourth word after her first comma. But an image of Anna's smile flashed through Lin mind. He thought that learning how to talk and socialize with girls from now on might be a good idea, so he let out a breath and nodded: "Okay."
"Eh? Okay?"
"Wasn't it your suggestion?"
Yama received an unexpected answer. Lin didn't seem as unapproachable as she had imagined. After a moment of being stunned, she said "Mhm!" with great excitement.
For the rest of the trip, Yama was the one finding topics. Lin listened most of the time, only occasionally responding with a few interjections. There was an unexpected sense of harmony between them.
So this is what it's like to talk to a girl? It doesn't seem that hard. Chatting with a girl I don't know at all is quite simple.
Lin thought this as he looked at Yama smiling face.
In the reflection of the bus window, Lin caught a glimpse of the situation behind the school bus.
"No one is allowed to leave the designated area. No conflicts. The ingredients have been prepared for you. The remaining time is for free activities."
The accompanying teacher seemed to have grown weary of taking a bunch of high-energy students to the mountains. After briefly stating the precautions, she went back to the bus to rest.
"Senior Lin..."
"Uncle! Uncle!"
Lin, who was picking out ingredients and taking seasonings from his bag, was tackled to the ground by an excited person. He lay expressionless among the overturned water spinach, looking at the girl in the beret riding on top of him.
Such a scene naturally drew the attention of those nearby. They saw a beautiful girl riding on the stomach of a... who was that? Anyway, an unfamiliar boy in a hoodie, her smile more brilliant than the spring sun.
"Long time no see, Uncle!"
"...We've only been apart for two and a half hours."
"But since we weren't on the same bus, we couldn't talk. You didn't reply to my messages either. I brought a lot of snacks to eat together..."
"You can eat them now."
"So I finished them all by myself on the bus."
"..."
Lin helplessly climbed up from the ground. Seeing the slender hand Anna held out, he said quietly: "No need."
"A girl's help cannot be refused, especially help from the super cute Anna." Anna pinched his cheek, pouting.
Lin shook his head. He picked up the water spinach from the ground to go wash it; he didn't like wasting food.
"Let's go. I'll do the grilling."
"Hehe, okay."
The two walked away. Another girl who hadn't been noticed stood alone on the spot, watching their receding backs, her outstretched hand dropping dejectedly.
Special Chapter: Soul of Sorrow (Part 2)
Be careful not to let sparks land on the vegetation, be careful not to pick and eat mushrooms under the trees, be careful not to play too roughly...
Everyone's ears were calloused from hearing these warnings, but if five out of ten people actually followed them, it was considered successful publicity.
So, among the students who were recklessly playing with charcoal and the couples rolling on the grass so much they were almost taking their clothes off, Lin—quietly and properly grilling meat—was a remarkably refreshing sight.
"Uncle~"
"No."
Lin calmly flipped the meat skewers, sprinkled them with cumin, and responded to Anna.
Anna puffed out her cheeks and glared at Lin: "I haven't even said anything yet."
"If you were going to do something normal, you wouldn't ask me for permission. And as for something abnormal..." Lin pointed with his carving knife toward the warning sign in the distance that prohibited swimming. "Asking me is useless."
"Uncle, I'm your future wife! Shouldn't a normal man dote on his wife!" Anna became even more dissatisfied.
"First of all, you are a 'future wife,' not the current one. Secondly, no matter what kind of love it is, it shouldn't develop into excessive spoiling." Lin sprinkled chopped green onions on the skewers and said flatly, "Do you want to be like those people kissing on the grass as if no one else exists? Unfortunately, I don't."
"Ahhh! I'm angry! Uncle!"
"..."
"I'm angry!"
"You said that already."
"I'm emphasizing it! So you'll comfort me!"
"..."
Lin placed the grilled meat on a nearby plate and looked coldly at Anna, whose face was puffed out like a pufferfish, saying nothing.
"Humph! I've decided not to talk to you for half an hour!"
Anna stood up and stomped away. Lin called out behind her: "Eat—"
"I'm full!"
Well, even couples in the honeymoon phase have moments of friction, let alone a man like Lin who knew nothing of romance. But fortunately, Anna wasn't truly a spoiled princess; when she said half an hour, she meant half an hour—not a minute more, not a minute less.
After Anna had walked some distance away, a male student who had been observing for a long time blocked her path. He showed his white teeth and gave a brilliant smile: "Anna, do you have some time..."
Anna took a deep breath, then gave an equally brilliant smile and interrupted him: "Sure, I have time—as long as you don't mind kissing a mouth that's been [Beeped] by another man, and as long as you can accept that the girl you worked so hard to pursue used to spend every day with another man changing postures, locations, and times, using expressions and tones you can't even imagine to flip the clouds and rain, to turn heaven and earth upside down..."
The male student's expression changed instantly. He likely didn't expect Anna to be able to deliver such... shocking dialogue in one breath.
"Uh... I..."
"Can't accept it, right?" Anna let out a cold laugh. "Don't worry, I was joking. Even if you could accept it, I would never agree. I just said it to make a scumbag like you—who plans to wreck a relationship the moment he sees a couple argue—jealous of him."
"..."
"Mhm, I feel better. I'll walk around a bit, then go back to find Uncle."
Only when mentioning Lin did she show the smile of a little girl.
"Want some?"
Lin asked plainly.
"..."
He looked up at a certain tree. After a while, a girl walked out shyly from behind it. She hadn't expected Lin to notice her.
"Senior Lin, aren't you going to go after her?" Yama looked in the direction Anna had left.
"No need."
"Are you two..."
"A couple."
"Oh..."
Even though she had gathered as much from the previous conversation, Yama couldn't help but feel a wave of disappointment.
Lin didn't notice the loneliness in the girl's eyes. He picked up the plate and asked again: "Want some?"
"Is it okay? Anna..."
"...What's the problem?"
Lin asked back, not quite understanding.
From Lin tone, Yama seemed to have discovered something. She stared at Lin and the plate in his hand for a few seconds before forcing a smile: "Okay."
It had to be said that Lin skill was the best among anyone Yama knew. He could make a simple skewer of grilled meat look and taste wonderful. The aroma was mouth-watering, and with one bite, the juices filled her entire mouth. He was an excellent chef, something one couldn't tell from his gloomy appearance.
But at the thought that this skewer was originally grilled for someone else, Yama felt an indescribable sensation.
Yama, oh Yama, you're too greedy. Senior Lin was just a stranger to you, yet you're approaching him with these kinds of feelings...
"I don't quite understand how to handle my relationship with her properly."
"Huh?"
The topic Lin suddenly opened caught Yama off guard. She listened as Lin spoke with a rare tone of confusion: "I've been alone my whole life. She's my first family member, so I don't know what kind of attitude to have toward her, when to say what, how to make her happy... I don't know any of it."
Yama blankly murmured in a low voice: "No wonder..."
"Disciplining her strictly, treating her the way I treat myself—I thought that would be enough, but she doesn't seem to like it." Lin said in a cold yet lost voice: "I don't know... how to return someone's love."
As a person who never had a heart, emotions, or love, Lin thought his quiet life would be spent in a self-contained world without ripples. But Anna's appearance was like a bright stroke of color painted onto his stark black-and-white world.
It left him at a loss.
"Senior Lin, have you never felt love from others before?" Yama wore an expression of sudden realization and self-deprecation. "So that's how it is... You wouldn't care, and you wouldn't notice..."
"..."
"Then... let me help you."
Yama put away the meaningless disappointment on her face, her expression settling into one she was satisfied with.
Lin looked at the girl. She met his gaze with a look as beautiful as the sunset: "I'll help Senior Lin practice how to communicate with girls and how to handle a relationship. How about it?"
Lin asked, puzzled: "How would we do that?"
"Um... just imagine me as Anna. Then I'll simulate various scenarios with Senior Lin, and I'll tell you when to say what to make a girl happy."
"Simulate being a couple?"
"Yes~"
Yama nodded, her smile like a flower.
Lin thought about the logic behind it and it seemed there was no problem. So, without taking much time, Lin nodded back in agreement: "Okay."
"Okay, then let's start the first training. Senior Lin, have you ever said 'I love you' to Anna?"
"No."
"Then..."
Yama tilted her head gently, mottled shadows of the trees dancing across her shoulders.
"Senior Lin, I love you. Can you say 'I love you' to me?"
Special Chapter: Soul of Sorrow (Part 3)
"Girls also know in their hearts that they are sometimes being unreasonable. What they need is the other person's attitude, not substantive support."
"If they know they're being unreasonable, why do they continue?"
"...Senior Lin, that's the problem. You shouldn't ask why; you should just reply 'I understand'."
"But aren't you being unreasonable?"
"..."
It had to be said that Lin mind was agile, yet he wasn't willing to use it at all in social interactions. He was direct and unwilling to bow his head; to him, one was one and two was two. Yama had to work very hard to make him understand that this wasn't a question of right and wrong or logic, but a matter of mood.
"Okay, let's simulate the scene when Anna left just now."
Yama recalled Anna's tone, then looked at the small section of Lin chin visible under his hoodie. Her teeth chattered slightly: "I-I'm angry!"
"Why are you angry?"
"That's not the right answer, Senior Lin."
"..."
Lin was silent for a moment, then changed to a more soothing tone: "That was my fault just now. Is there somewhere you want to go?"
"Mhm... although it's still very stiff, the direction is correct! In short, Senior Lin, when a girl is angry—aside from matters of principle—try to go along with her, but also maintain your own dignity. Love is an equal relationship; the emotional investment is reciprocal. When you are angry, the other person will comfort you in turn. If only one person is constantly giving, then it's better to end the relationship as soon as possible."
Too complicated.
Was interacting with people really such a complex thing?
Lin memorized everything Yama said, but he still had a question: "What if she says 'Leave me alone'? What should I do then?"
Anna hadn't said anything like that to him yet, but given Anna's traumatic past, Lin was worried that if she said those words in the future and he didn't handle it properly, it would cause her secondary trauma.
"..." Upon hearing this, a bashful, sugary color painted Yama pretty face. She lowered her head slightly, using her bangs to hide her blush. "Um... well... a friend told me that if a girl says to leave her alone, you should kiss her hard, bite her lips, lick her tongue, and kiss her until her whole body goes soft..."
Lin was stunned for a moment, then frowned.
K-Kissing?
He and Anna kissed frequently, but it was always her unilateral demand. Lin had never tried taking the initiative to kiss.
And what kind of maneuver was "kissing until her whole body goes soft"? Was it oxygen deprivation?
Lin spread his hands and said honestly: "I don't know how."
"Y-You don't?! Hasn't Senior Lin kissed Anna before?"
"It's not that." Lin thought of the bite marks on his collarbone and said muffledly, "But it's usually her making my whole body go soft and my head spin."
"Ah... is that so..." Yama gave a dry laugh. Then she thought of something; her eyes flickered toward Lin lips a few times, she swallowed, and asked tentatively, "Then... do you want to... practice..."
The moment the words left her mouth, Yama regretted it.
What are you saying, Yama! Is your brain rusty!
At the thought of how Lin would look at her next, she couldn't help but want to turn around and run.
"Get down."
Boom!
Yama was tackled by a massive force. Immediately following was a searing heat by her ear, as if she'd been burned by something. Amidst the vibration of ringing in her ears, she looked blankly at the boy who had tackled her. A hole had been shot through his shoulder, and bright red blood was flowing from it.
"Wha...?"
She didn't understand what had happened. Two seconds ago, Lin was perfectly fine, and then she heard... gunshots?
Yama felt as if she had been thrown into an ice cellar, her spine turning cold.
"Hide." Lin threw her into the nearby bushes, then immediately stood up. After another gunshot, he moved through the forest like a gust of wind.
When they were on the bus, Lin had noticed something. Two cars had been following the school bus all the way from the city to these sparsely populated mountains. He just hadn't expected something like this to happen.
But on second thought, there were some children of wealthy families at Chiba Academy—perhaps it was a kidnapping?
Then why fire at him and Yama?
Lin glanced at the carving knife in his hand.
Were we considered threats to be eliminated immediately? A group of rookie kidnappers too nervous; they'd fire just because I have a knife.
This is truly... thought-provoking!
Lin leapt down from a branch, his knife reflecting the sunlight, and lunged toward the terrified kidnapper.
Yama shivered helplessly in the waist-high grass. She had no idea what was happening; she could only hear the constant sounds of gunshots, fighting, and screams coming from outside. The image of Lin pushing her and getting shot kept flashing through her mind.
Lin...
Her heart beat faster and faster. She didn't dare peek out, fearing that as soon as she opened the grass, she would see Lin dead on the ground with a bullet hole in his forehead.
"It's over."
A cold, sharp voice sounded above her head.
Yama looked up blankly, only to see light.
The boy, with a streak of blood on his cheek, stood in the dappled light of the forest. He let go of the blood-stained knife and gently held out his palm to her.
His dark, restrained pupils were like black pearls.
"Are you alright, Yama?"
"Uncle~ I'll never argue with you again..."
Anna's eyes were filled with tears. She stood sobbing behind Lin as the doctor treated his wound. The tip of her nose was red, like a tempting cherry.
"...It's not your fault." Lin shook his head and asked in return, "What about you? Are you okay?"
"Mhm... the other kidnappers ran away after they found out you'd beaten their accomplices."
"It's good that you're fine."
Lin talked with Anna for a long while. She had wanted to stay at the hospital with him, but Lin ordered her to go back and sleep; Benares would surely be worried about her. So Anna could only return to the orphanage.
There was a rare quiet. Lin lay on the hospital bed staring at the white ceiling. After a long while, he spoke: "Aren't you going back to rest yet?"
Yama timidly walked in from outside the door. She looked at Lin, who was wrapped in white gauze, and the wound on his shoulder. Faced with Lin gaze, she waited a good while before a soft sentence escaped her mouth: "This is my family's hospital..."
Lin was silent for a moment: "Thank you."
"No, I'm the one who should say thank you. If it weren't for Senior Lin, I probably would have been..."
"Don't worry about it. It was just instinct."
"Instinct... was it?" Yama whispered the word, the expression on her face growing even darker.
Since exactly when did she start noticing this boy who never drew attention, yet was actually so unique?
She always watched him from afar, fantasizing that one day they would get to know each other. But after truly meeting him, his love had already been snatched away by someone else first.
When she stood in an unseen corner eavesdropping on the conversation between Lin and Anna, she couldn't help but project herself into Anna's place.
Truly... shameless.
There was a fire in her heart, burning vigorously, wanting to replace someone, wanting to possess someone, wanting to knead and squeeze him until he was all, all, all inside her body—
That fire was about to drive her mad.
No, she already was.
Mad.
Click.
Lin heard the sound of the door being locked. Immediately following was the soft sound of fabric rubbing against skin. Silky material slid off fair skin. His brow twitched, and then he opened his eyes, stunned by the sight before him.
A sense of déjà vu rushed from his heart to his brain. He wanted to get up immediately, but his weak, powerless body made even his eyelids tremble.
"This is my family's hospital."
Lin struggled to lift his head and look at the IV bag. The transparent liquid was flowing drop by drop into his body.
Tap.
A perfect arm braced itself next to Lin head. A pretty face wearing a pathological smile appeared in his already blurred vision.
"Don't... come over..."
"Senior Lin, you can't say things like that to a girl~ Let me teach you what you should say at a time like this~"
She lowered her head, using her fingers to undo the buttons of his hospital gown. She pulled open his collar, saw the bite marks on Lin collarbone and neck, and stuck out her delicate tongue to carefully... lick over them once.
"I love you, Senior Lin. Even if you're just lying to me, please say it to me now..."
"'I love you'."