Hm-hm-hm, hm, hm-hm-hmmm."
I remember a question a friend once asked me.
"Which color do you like best?"
I was small then, so I thought about it very hard. I've always been serious about things like that.
"Ah—no, stop! Please, stop it!"
I agonized over it, weighing my options, and finally, I decided.
"I like red."
I think red is wonderful. After all, red is the color of blood. It's the color of the proof that everyone is alive, flowing inside them. I think the blood that spills out when someone gets hurt is exquisite. It makes me feel like I'm truly living, so I love it.
That's why I decided to help. I help people dress up in that wonderful color. The other person becomes beautiful, I become happy, and everyone ends up smiling.
"Why?! Why are you doing this?!"
The voice of the boy I was currently "dressing up" drifted into my ears. He seemed confused. I suppose that's only natural; normal people don't usually stab others with knives.
Yes, I should tell him. I want the people I love to understand me, after all.
"Because I love you."
I really, truly love you.
"I love how kind you are. I love your sense of style. I love the way you listen to me talk. I love your smiling face. I love the way you tell funny jokes. I love the way you touch me. I love the way you pet my head. I love the way you look at me. I love how you worry about me. I love how you have so many friends. I love how you check in on me all the time. I love the cute way you say my name. I love the way you think. I love your voice. I love the color of your eyes. I love your messy hair. I love your tanned skin. I love your body, which is tougher than it looks. I love the shape of your ears. I love your big palms. I love your soft lips."
Words can't even begin to describe how much I love you.
"I love you, I really do. I love you so much. I think about you every moment I'm awake and every moment I'm asleep. I want to be by your side forever. I never want to leave you. I want us to become one. I love you. I want us to be so, so happy together. You said you loved me too, didn't you? Yay! It's mutual. We love each other. So, it's okay, isn't it? Just stay by my side. Stay close, forever."
So, please, make me love you even more. Make me completely obsessed with you.
"I truly believe red is wonderful, don't you? Don't you find people who smell like iron so... alluring? So, let's get you dressed up in lots and lots of it, okay? You love what I love, right? Because we love each other? It's so wonderful to understand each other. It's beautiful, hihihi!"
"Hee—?! Stop—gack!!"
The sensation of the knife gouging into flesh.
The splattering red.
The choking scent of iron.
Combined with the background music of his screams, it was all so romantic. Oh, but the screaming is a bit much. Someone came to interfere once because they heard the noise. This world is so difficult to live in, even though we love each other this much.
I stuffed a handkerchief into his mouth, reducing his screams to muffled groans. It might be painful for him, but I need him to endure it.
Hmm... but this is wonderful, too. Such a cute voice.
"Ah, I love you, I love you. I love you so much. You smell so good. It's giving me chills. I'm going to love you even more now."
He was making garbled noises, so I couldn't tell what he was saying. But I'm sure he was happy. He'd become such a wonderful color, after all.
"Did you know? Humans have so much blood in them, but if you pick the right spots to stab, they don't die nearly as fast as you'd think. Don't worry. I know exactly what I'm doing. So, let's do lots and lots of 'good things' together for as long as we can, okay? Let's melt into each other and love each other until we're a mess."
Ah, I love him. I love the terrified look in his eyes. Even the smell of urine mixing with the iron is wonderful. Yes, this is perfect.
Stab, stab, stab.
He turned redder and redder. He smelled more and more like iron. He was becoming more beautiful by the second.
I don't know how long I kept at it, but eventually, he became terribly weak. The light in his eyes faded. His groans were barely audible. The body that had been stiff with resistance went limp.
It was almost time. How sad. The fun times always end in the blink of an eye. I wanted to love him even more. I wanted us to get even hotter. What a shame.
I licked the blood dripping from his throat; it tasted of thick, concentrated life. The taste of being alive. I leaned in close to the boy as he watched me helplessly and spoke to him in a soothing voice. He's so kind, after all—I'm sure he was worried.
"...It's okay, you know? Even if you die, I'll become you. Even if you're gone, I'll be here in your place."
His throat hitched.
"I've memorized everything about you. I've watched you so much. We've talked so much. We've spent so much time together. So it's okay. I'll suck you all up. I'll make sure I can become you whenever I want. You have so many things, and you're so kind, so you're probably worried, right? Worried about the people who will be sad when you're gone. It's okay, because I'll be you. So you can die in peace. Your friends are my friends now."
When I said that, his eyes went wide. My words must have moved him deeply. I could hear him groaning.
"Don't worry. I'll love them all in your place. I'll give them as much love as I gave you. Lots and lots and lots."
So, it's okay now, right?
Goodnight. My beloved.
I brought the knife down, burying it deep in his chest. Right through the ribs, straight into the heart where all the red is kept.
"The only one allowed to kill me is All Might!!"
I was listening to the voice of the wonderful Stain—my new favorite from a few days ago—through my earphones while I took the boy's blood, but static started to bleed into the sound. I pulled out one earphone and listened closely. Footsteps were echoing from the far end of the hallway.
Click-clack... The sound of expensive shoes. It was definitely a grown man.
It's a hassle if I'm seen, so I hid in the shadows to wait for an opening. After a moment, a middle-aged man with a cigarette in his mouth walked in. I recognized him immediately. An old friend.
"...Man, you really made a mess of things this time. You're close by, aren't you, Himiko Toga? I'm not tacky enough to call the cops, so why don't you come out and let's have a chat...?"
"I love chats! Let's talk!"
I pressed my knife against the man's throat, and he immediately raised both hands. The signal for surrender.
"Whoops. You got behind me already? I guess the rumors don't do you justice. You're making this old man sweat."
"Is that the 'chat' you wanted?"
"Now, now, calm down. I'm sorry for interrupting your fun. I just wanted to introduce you to a fun job. I mean, you're short on cash, aren't you, Himiko Toga?"
Cash? Well, yes. I don't have very much. But I haven't really been struggling, either.
"Don't tell me you're fine without it. Money is better than no money. If you want to keep playing like this, it's going to cost you."
The word "playing" made me a little cross. This isn't play.
"...I've been fine so far, haven't I?"
"That's because the police and heroes haven't really started moving yet. Once they get serious, you won't be able to do what you want without someone to back you up. Is that what you want? To waste all your time on a boring game of tag instead of doing what you actually want to do? I wouldn't like that if I were you."
I wouldn't like that either. I want to love so many more people. Even though Stain is my number one right now.
"I'll listen. What is it?"
"Haha, thanks. ...Well, money aside, you might actually find this interesting."
"?"
I wondered what he meant, and then the man told me.
"This old man has a few... 'bad' acquaintances. And one of them is looking for help."
"Help?"
"Yep. That acquaintance happens to be the organization that the famous Hero Killer belonged to..."
"...Stain's organization!"
"Oh? Now that's a bite."
That was very good news indeed. Not only would I get money, but I'd be in the same place as Stain. Even though he's captured right now, I might eventually have the chance to meet him.
This is wonderful. The world really is a wonderful place. It's a bit hard to live in, but there are so many happy things that happen.
"Mister! Mister! I want to go there! Please take me!"
The man nodded at my request.
"Alright, alright. Calm down a bit. Let's talk about the conditions and such."
"I don't understand difficult things! Just make it 'nice'!"
"'Nice,' huh...? I'm a pretty nice guy, so I'll handle it, but you really should think about these things yourself."
"You are a nice guy, Mister! I'm starting to like you a little bit!"
"Now that would be a problem, haha."
It seemed like I couldn't go right away, so the man said he'd contact me once the date and time were set. After we finished exchanging contact info, the man looked at the boy who was no longer moving.
"...I can help you clean up here as a bonus, if you'd like?"
"I'm fine. I still have to suck him up lots, and I want our goodbye to be just the two of us."
"Is that so? Well, how about I send someone over after you're finished?"
After I'm finished...? That would be helpful.
"Yes, please! Should I just contact you when I'm done?"
"Do that. Ah—and I'll make sure to steer people away from here for a bit. It wouldn't be good if the girl I'm recommending got caught, after all."
With that, the man vanished into the shadows of the hallway.
He wasn't lying about clearing the area; I could feel the presence of people fading away. I put my earphones back in and listened to Stain's wonderful voice while I sipped the boy's blood.
The warm taste of life. As it melts and mixes inside me, I finally become him. I become the same as the boy I love. We aren't two people anymore. We're one. How exquisite.
"Hah... it's making me all wet. Truly wonderful."
I want to see you, Stain. I want to know you, Stain. I want to talk to you, Stain. I wonder what kind of face you'll make. I wonder what you'll say.
You, who looks so good in blood. You, who I bet smells wonderful.
"You'll love me too, won't you? Because I love you this much."
And we'll become one...
"...Niko-chan... Secret... Technique..."
"..."
I must have messed up the settings; I could hear that girl's voice. The girl who looks so good in blood, just like me. And yet, for some reason, I just can't bring myself to like her. It isn't because she caught Stain. I just... don't like her.
"How mysterious."
I reset the audio and listened to Stain's wonderful voice once more. Then, I slowly spent the final moments with the boy.
Very, very slowly.
***
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