Lying on a hospital bed in the city clinic, in the late stages of gastric cancer, Zhang Hengtai had been suffering for some time. In recent days his drowsiness and bouts of unconsciousness had grown worse. He knew he did not have much time left.
At this moment, Zhang Hengtai, propped on the bed, was unusually lucid—perhaps for the last time. During that brief clarity he reflected on a life that, by most measures, had been ordinary. He had achieved little. His one concession to stability had been the career change from teacher to civil servant. In a government system without connections, advancement felt almost impossible. Near retirement, the office, out of deference to long service, granted him the rank of First-Class Section Chief.
His deepest regret was never seeing those who had accused his father brought to justice.
What he could not let go of were his two children and the wife who had stood by him all his life.
Seeing his son sitting by the bedside, Zhang reached for his hand with trembling fingers. The son grabbed it quickly and, with tears in his eyes, cried, "Dad, you must get better!"
Zhang replied weakly, "I know my own body. From now on you must rely on yourself. You're the man of the family. Take good care of your mother and your sister."
His daughter, already in tears, sobbed, "Dad, you have to be well. I want to watch you at my wedding. I haven't been filial to you yet. I can't bear to lose you."
"Dad can't do this anymore," Zhang whispered, "and I can't bear to leave you. You must behave in the future—don't be willful—and spend more time talking to Mom."
Zhang raised his head and, with all the strength he could muster, reached for his wife.
Liu Meiyu's face was drawn with worry. She gripped her husband's hand without hesitation.
Breathing became progressively more difficult for Zhang. Summoning his remaining strength, he said, "My wife, marrying you was the happiest thing in my life. It's my fault I didn't take better care of myself. I can't be with you any longer. You will have to look after the children. If there is a next life, I will make sure you live well."
Liu Meiyu held his hand tightly. "Old man, we are ordinary people. You never let me lack food or clothing in this life. Don't talk nonsense. You can't give up and leave me alone. If you abandon us, I will never forgive you."
Zhang felt utterly spent, his strength ebbing away. He looked at those closest to him with reluctance. His consciousness dimmed. Looking back over his life, a profound unwillingness filled him. He harbored an obsession: if he could live his life again, he would not choose ordinariness. He refused to be powerless again.
The stars had vanished last night, and the hills lay far away.
"I am conquered by you, cutting off all my retreat… I will accompany you to watch the meteor shower fall to earth, let your tears fall on my shoulder."
Hearing songs from the era drift through the streets, feeling the energy in his limbs, Zhang glanced at his old school uniform and the familiar gate before him—Yingjiang Normal University. He was stunned. Had he truly been reborn? Or were the last forty-plus years a fleeting dream?
The campus remained the same, but Zhang Hengtai was no longer the same man. Everything had changed.
How could one understand the bitterness of life without tasting its vinegar and ink? Since fate had given him another chance, he must seize it. In this life he would not settle for mediocrity. He would fight for a brighter future for himself and his family and live up to this opportunity bestowed upon him.
Zhang walked through the school gate with determination. His life began again with that step.
The situation clarified quickly. It was now May, and his three-year stint as a teaching trainee was drawing to a close. Normal schools accepted many outstanding junior-high graduates to strengthen rural education, a policy that was both fortunate and fraught. Fortunately, as one of the last cohorts guaranteed placement in the county's teacher training college, Zhang had been admitted despite fierce competition; only forty-five students had been accepted. Annual tuition was 800 yuan, and the government provided a monthly food subsidy of 60 yuan—help that significantly eased his family's burden. He had also been assigned a job after graduation.
Unfortunately, the state was beginning to prefer cadres with higher formal education; a secondary technical-school diploma would be a liability for any political career.
He would have to remedy his lack of academic credentials. Thankfully, Zhang had registered for the self-taught college entrance exams during his second year, and only two subjects remained before he could claim that diploma. After that, he intended to obtain a bachelor's degree and then pursue graduate studies.
"Zhang Hengtai, I'm looking for you. Have you filled out the registration form from last time?" a familiar, kindly voice interrupted his thoughts. He looked up and saw Director Xu. He suddenly remembered that the school had recommended outstanding student leaders for internships with the Municipal Party Committee and Municipal Government.
"I'll fill it out and bring it to your office tomorrow," Zhang replied.
"Good. I think this is an opportunity. An internship would broaden your perspective. You're the vice president of the student union, and our school has four vacancies. If you want to go, I'll reserve a spot for you."
"Thank you, Director Xu. I'll work hard."
After speaking with Director Xu, Zhang recalled that every student had to complete a two-month internship before graduation. The school arranged it uniformly. Generally, each student returned to their county, and the county education bureau placed them accordingly.
But Yingjiang's technical secondary school was one of the city's more notable institutions at the time. For that reason, the Municipal Party Committee and Municipal Government traditionally recruited exceptional student cadres for internships. Before 1997, alumni reportedly secured positions in the Municipal Party Committee and Municipal Government each year.
Two former students had even advanced to the Provincial Party Committee and the Provincial Youth League Committee; their names remained legendary on campus.
Zhang understood this tradition had become largely ceremonial. In recent years, interns were seldom assigned permanent posts afterward. The last person placed in the Municipal Party Committee had been Wang Min, president of the 1997 Student Union. Since then, placements had ceased.
Many students considered the practice a waste of time and preferred internships at schools to improve their pedagogical skills.
Zhang, however, had his sights set on a political career. An internship at the municipal Party committee and government felt essential. If he stayed humble, cautious, and diligent, he could expand his network and meet people whose careers might rise. He remembered one name clearly: Guo Mingyu, the municipal government's deputy secretary-general, who was due to become the mayor of Ningyang County next year after nine years as county magistrate. Making a good impression on him could open doors. In a county, the Party secretary and mayor wielded real authority.
Director Xu was the deputy director of the school's Political and Educational Department, responsible for admissions and student management. Xu and Zhang's father had been classmates at the 1983 Normal School, and he had even visited Zhang's home when Zhang enrolled. Because of that connection, Director Xu had watched over Zhang during his three years at the school.
In his second year, Zhang had run for the student union as class monitor. Director Xu gave him the highest score, helping him win the vice-presidency. When the campus news agency formed, Director Xu recommended Zhang as president—an experience that improved Zhang's organizational and writing skills. Director Xu later became the first principal of the affiliated middle school when the Normal University established it. Leveraging the university's faculty, he turned the school into the city's top middle school. Zhang remembered how difficult it had been to secure a place in the affiliated middle school when his child was in junior high, but Director Xu had obtained a spot for him without cost. Zhang had never forgotten the kindness, though in his previous life he had been too mediocre to repay it.
Looking around the familiar campus and at familiar faces, Zhang smiled. Who wouldn't want to be eighteen again? Now that he was here, he resolved to make the best of it and savor his youth.
Soon they reached the playground. Basketball had always been Zhang's first passion, and he was a principal player on the school team.
Class 3 and Class 5 were in a friendly match. Spotting the team captain approaching, Dawei shouted, "Captain, get on the court quick and let Class 5 get schooled!"
"Boss, come on stage," Zhou Xiaolei chimed in.
"Can't do it, too tired, you do it," Ma Jiafeng complained.
"Watch me—I'll take them all," Zhang said, slapping hands with Ma Jiafeng as he went onto the court.
In his former life, after starting work, Zhang had given up basketball within a few years. Had he persisted he might not have ballooned from 128 pounds to over 200 and later succumbed to illness. He resolved to prioritize fitness in this life. On the court, youth felt boundless; sweat poured freely.
Class 5's main players included two fellow townsmen from Saibei who were close friends of Zhang. They always resorted to dirty tricks during interclass games.
"Hey, watch your waist!" Bin shouted.
"Mind your head, hehe," Wei Lin added.
"Dawei, pass the ball. Watch me beat those wimps from Class 5! Haha," Zhang called, brimming with confidence.
On the court the joy of youth unfurled, earnest and unreserved.