I was born in the worst era ever, It was the year 3025. Humanity was always fighting each other for something or another, Rape, Murder, Robbery. It was considered normal by the masses and People in power did these things on an regular basis and got away with it every single time, I hated my life.
I was just an average guy who worked a job that he hated but had to do it for survival and basic needs, The factory was hell come to life, i worked on machines everyday, hoping one day my supervisor would notice me and give me a raise, he knew all about my problems at home, yet still choose to ignore my needs and never acknowledge the work that i put in for the factory, i hated the look on my co-worker's faces, i knew they hated the job as well but had no other choice. Just like them, I worked inhumane hours to provide for my sick mother. She was also an victim of rape, due to not having enough money to abort me or knowing what to do, she had me in back of an ally way after some creepy doctor decided to help her for something in return. Sometimes, I wish I wasn't born. My helplessness and my desire to become something i knew i couldn't was the major reason for my downfall, I was nothing but a coward, who believed he could do something to change this rotten world and bring hope to the people. I realized quickly that wasn't the case, This world is filled with people who are willing live in a broken world as long as it doesn't affect them, as long as they can live a safe and somewhat happy life, they accept whatever gets thrown their way since it's part of his plan, These people are like rats, who are living in a cage. They need to be fed and have a warm bed and they are happy, they never wish to live a life of purpose or for themselves. Every since that day, i decided that i will never bother helping these people if this is the life they choose, They choose a life of ignorance, they will let others suffer as long as they don't suffer themselves. This world is rotten to its core, so instead of changing it, i decided to join them. The world rewards people who aren't afraid to take risks or aren't afraid to do evil deeds to achieve their goals. Villains are rewarded in this world, If God really exists like these people claim, then he clearly doesn't care about anyone, he doesn't protect the innocent, he only cares if people worship him or not, this world uses a belief to make themselves feel better, they do heinous crimes and then go worship their god the next day, hoping that he forgives them despite what they've just done. If i was a god, i would've burnt this world to the ground and start over, i wish i was powerful enough to do that, i want to watch this world burn to the ground. Despite all this, there was still one person i believed was a saint amongst monsters, My childhood friend, Noora. She is a saint, something i respect deeply from the bottom of my heart, sometimes i wish i could marry her and leave this godforsaken world, not only is she beautiful, she's funny, she understands my depressing humor and never makes fun of me despite all my flaws, i think she secretly likes me, she was my entire world and i cherished her. I was always weak from the beginning, an helpless weakling, I was bullied my entire life for my cowardness, whenever i tried defending someone, i would get thrown aside and get treated as a prop for other's entertainment. Noora was the only one who defended me during these times, she would be the first one to come for my rescue, the person who never saw me as an prop, someone who saw the real me and never judged me for anything. She always had an smile on her face and would calm me down.
"You shouldn't let others put you down, You're better than this!" She would say this with an smile but i could always tell she was concerned about me deep down, Despite how stupid it sounds, Her smile was my treasure, something i was never willing to let go. Her hands were so warm and soft, she used to hold my hands whenever i got scared, she was the light to my darkness, my only hope for humanity, If god truly did exist, i don't know why he put such an angel into this cruel world. Now that i think about it, she probably was the only reason i choose not to become a heartless monster like the rest of them.
I've lived a life of pain & suffering but since I've lived long enough eventually i got used to the pain and suffering, Pain became part of my daily life and suffering was just an old friend, but nothing could've prepared me for what was to come next, I lost my whole world that day.
It was 25th June 3026, It was an average day just like any other, work myself to death, come home to my sick mother and tend to her, think about killing myself, then she visits me and everything becomes better. But today, she didn't visit me, it was especially surprising since today was my birthday, i expected her to visit me and spend the day with me, but she didn't show up at all. I was worried so i decided to call her, Then i heard his voice, Her abusive father, Kalvin. He was an stark reminder that she also suffered in this godforsaken world but choose not to accept it, she choose to be better than me and make her own destiny, choose her own path. He clearly was drunk and talking about how i took his daughter away from him.
"You're the reason she doesn't love me anymore, She doesn't call me papa anymore!" He screamed from top of his lungs, I knew full well why she chooses not to communicate with him anymore. But i wasn't interested in some drunken man's blabbing, i was looking for Noora and i wasn't going to let him waste any more of my time, then I remembered she was an bartender in some bar somewhere around the business district, i ran towards that bar as if the world was ending and this was the last thing i could ever do. I know it might sound pathetic but for me, she was my world and her disappearing was like the world ending for me. I entered the bar and questioned the owner
"Where is she? Where is Noora? I need to know where she is right now!" i screamed loudly
"She's not here, That brat didn't show up to work today, so why don't you take your ass out of my bar and stop disturbing the customers" He said while glaring me down aggressively
"I Won't leave till i know where Noora is, i need to know" i said while shaking & Tears coming down my eyes
"I don't care where that little brat is right now, She didn't show up to work and i'll fire her the moment she shows up, So move it" He said while pointing towards the door
That's when i heard it, Laughter coming from corner of the bar, bunch of men laughing, i was so much in shock that i didn't realize it at the time but they were mocking her, an innocent girl being lost in this world full of monsters, despite how helpless i felt at times, today i was not going to let it stop me, i rushed towards them and punched one of them.
"Laugh at her again and see what happens" I screamed while tears were coming down my eyes
One of the men punches me and pushes me towards the ground then repeatedly kicks me
"You think I'll let a peasant like yourself punch and not do anything, HUH?" He said with a evil grin on his face
The owner came and grabbed me by the neck and threw me out of the bar
"Never come back to this place again, we don't serve your kind" He screamed towards me
Despite bleeding heavily, i decided it was probably best for me to stay low and wait till those low life decided to leave the bar and follow them, the way they were laughing, they definitely knew something about her, Then i saw them leave, they were drunk and going on and on about something.
"Man, That piece of meat was truly something, i can't wait till to give it another try" One said while holding an bottle in his hand
"I know right, That piece of meat was definitely worth the effort we went through" One said while laughing very loudly
I always considered myself a realistic person, someone who saw through things and knew exactly what was happening, today i was hoping i was wrong, i was hoping that this one time, i was wrong about something, If there was a god, i prayed to him, i prayed that these thoughts i had, were absolutely wrong. I followed them to an warehouse, My thoughts were slowly becoming reality, those deep dark thoughts i wish never came true, i slowly could see them become reality despite how much i didn't want them to, But the world is unfair and ever good thing must come to an end, i prepared myself for the worst, i tried finding something that could possibly help me in this situation, i grabbed an iron rod i found laying around, hoping it was work. I slowly followed them and then i saw it....My worst nightmare come true.
There she was, tied to an pole, naked and stripped of all her dignity, internally, i was screaming on top of lungs but externally, i knew what i had to do, i counted total 5 men, all clearly above 40s, All i could see was,
"Kill! Kill! Kill! Kill!" The words were in all red with a completely black background
it was like a song that you cannot get out of your head, just like that, those words were stuck on back my head. I knew i had to play it smart otherwise i could never do anything to help her out, i scanned the room for anyway i could help her and make sure she leaves this place safely, i saw a gun laying around on top of a chair with a black jacket hanging on top of it, i decided this is how i was going to help her, by killing everyone of these monsters and freeing her of this prison. Without thinking twice, i decided to jump on the man closing to the chair and stabbed him in the heart with all my strength, The feeling of stabbing someone for the first time was weird, only thing that felt wrong was that i didn't feel any remorse when killing that man, was it because i had no humanity left inside of me? Was it before the only good part of me was inside the woman i cherished?, before i could bother finding answers to my questions, i grabbed the gun from the chair and pointed it towards these monsters i was about to exterminate. The gun felt weird in my hand, like i was judge and the jury for an trial, i knew what they did was wrong but deep inside i felt like i could've done things different way, that i could've chosen not to point the gun at their faces but i also knew what kind of monsters these men were. They begged me not to kill them...
"You don't have to do this! we can work something out"
"You're so little, do you really wanna ruin your life like this"
"Please don't kill me! I have a family"
All i could hear were excuses from bunch of dead men, Rats begging for their lives to be spared, I refused and without a second thought, i shot them one by one. Then i grabbed a knife from the table and rushed towards Noora, i saw her crying for the first time, The woman who i considered a saint, someone who despite all odds choose not to give into the despair, i saw her crying for the first time, Those tears reminded me of how cruel this world is and how badly i wanna see it burn to the ground, but right now all i cared about was freeing the woman i loved. I freed her and instead of running, the first thing she did was hug me, i could feel her pain through my body....
Despite how used to pain i was, this was a different level of pain that i never felt before, was this the same pain my mother felt when having me? Was this pain worth everything she went through? Before i could get an answer to those question, we heard loud footsteps, i realized that the jacket on the chair belonged to someone else, Not the men i killed. Noora knew that as well, she slowly grabbed my face with her soft hands and kissed me, despite all the pain she went through, she still choose to follow her own path, she refused to give up without experiencing the joy of life, she gently pulled me back and calmly said...
"Kill Me, please."
Those words, i could never forget, she knew that she wasn't going to make it and refused to be the burden on my shoulders but i screamed and said
"I refuse to let you stay behind, i refuse to let the woman i love, stay behind" I said
Despite what i just said, she insisted that i kill her, she was very clear on her intentions
"Please let me die, i already experienced the happiest moment of my life with you right now, i don't want to experience the pain that might come later, Please Kill me." Noora said
Despite how opposed i was to her idea, deep inside, i knew she was right, the aftermath of what happened here would haunt her forever, an endless nightmare. I wish i didn't have to do this but i didn't have a choice, So I slowly started pointing the gun towards her head, While sobbing as much as i can, I wish this was a dream, i Wish i would wake up any second, but the harsh reality was that in this world, this stuff is considered the normal, People suffer everyday and no one notices their pain since they're so occupied with their own struggles. Despite how much my hands were shaking, i managed to force my finger towards the trigger. Before i could do anything, Noora slowly grabbed my face again and kissed me again...
"I want you to find happiness, I want to you to smile, Find what makes you happy and go after it, Don't stop no matter what, Promise me that!" She said
"I don't want to lose you!" I said while crying profusely
"It's okay to let go, sometimes things are meant to happen and you cannot stop them" She said, while smiling
Then it happened, all i could see was the smile i once cherished slowly disappear, My own world collapsing Infront of me, I screamed as loudly as i can, without caring for anything, The footsteps started becoming louder and louder but i couldn't hear them at all. My rage was consumed my body, then the door opened
"What the hell happened here? Who the hell are you!?" He screamed
I without thinking twice, rushed towards him and grabbed him by the waist, threw him towards the ground, i felt a bit weird but i was too high on adrenaline to care, before i knew it, i gouged his eyes out. All i could see was blood spewing out of his eyes, but i didn't stop there, i grabbed the iron rod and started stabbing him, he was the main reason Noora choose the way that she did, i was not going to let him die easily, all i could remember was me screaming, him screaming and blood all over me. Before i knew it, his body was just another lifeless corpse, then i sat down on the ground, started crying to myself, knowing how much i lost today. My only hope for humanity gone in an instant, taken away from me from the monsters of this world. Then then adrenaline starting wearing off slowly, i felt a little pain on my my abdomen, i looked down and saw blood spewing out of my abdomen, i slowly pieced the puzzle together, i had been shot while fighting that man. I knew what was about to happen and honestly, i was very mad, not because i was dying, because i couldn't see the world burn, i wanted this world to suffer the way i did. I wanted my pain to be something everyone went through, they had to realize the pain and suffering i went through.
If i did get to live another day, i would live a life i am happy with, i'll follow my own path, i'll do what's best for me and never look back, i'll be as selfish as i possibly can, those were the only thoughts in my head, another thought that was in my head, it was revenge, i wanted the world to pay for their sins, i wanted them to beg for my mercy, To beg for my forgiveness.
But deep inside i knew, i wouldn't survive this, i must've been shot during the fight and i moved so much after that, i don't have much time left anyway, the end is near. I slowly moved towards the woman i loved, putting my head on her shoulders and started to close my eyes, my rage hadn't stopped but i still knew the end was near, everything started becoming darker & darker, i knew my end was here. I felt like i was in drowning in the ocean, A ocean filled with darkness, Then i heard the voice.
"Do you wish to see the world burn?, Do make those who wronged you suffer?"
"To Become darkness itself?" The Voice said.
"Yes." Said I.
End of Chapter....