We all sat around the living area of the Shelby Oaks' retirement home, not doing much while we waited. The world began doing the thing where it would flash red and spawn monsters at us because we were staying in one spot for too long. Laura insisted on being the one to go out to take care of them, but I think she just wanted to work out some frustrations. Church was in a corner, looking at his game token and lost in thought. Why didn't he get melted? It was starting to bother me, but I could see it was doing a number on him. Jay was teaching Patti dog tricks while Laura watched in between killing shifts, and I warned her, "Patti isn't good with tricks. She follows and stuff, but she's not great at other stuff." Jay just looked at me and blew her tentacles out.
"Part of being a game manual is that I have the entirety of your Earth knowledge downloaded for me to use. That includes information on training dogs," she said.
"The entirety? What, like Wikipedia?" I asked. Jay's head went back up suddenly, and she looked at me.
"You know what it's called?" she said. I let out a little laugh and shook my head. "What is so funny, bone boy?" Laura belted out a laugh, and the two of them smiled at each other. Aw, shit, they were teaming up against me now! Maybe Church would take my side? Doubtful. The dude was pretty non-confrontational. I turned my attention back to the girl squad.
"Wikipedia is free to edit and stuff. You probably have false information in there that some twelve-year-old boy who is trying to be funny," I said.
"Why, did you edit a page or something, Max?" asked Laura. Jay and Laura giggled at that, and I grunted in response. Damn, they were teaming up against me! It made me happy deep down that the two got along well, but still, the sass! I was thinking of a clever comeback that would have totally put them both in their place when the world outside did something different this time. It flashed blue and red repeatedly. We all looked outside at this sudden color shift, and I looked to Jay. She had her calm demeanor back on, which made me realize something. She was like this when she knew what was happening in the game. It was when things didn't go according to plan that she felt uneasy.
"Jay?" I asked.
"It's an incoming message from a game master," Jay replied as she stood up. She looked at us all, who were still unsure. She then added, "From Jessica." We all made upset noises at that as we stood up and started heading to the door with Jay. Laura's eyes were narrowed, and her eyebrows furrowed. Church had pocketed the game token and threw an arm over my shoulder.
"What do you think your girlfriend is going to say?" he asked. I groaned loudly as Jay raised a hand to stifle a laugh.
"Dude, she is not my girlfriend!" I replied.
"Yeah, but does she know that?" Church retorted. This time, Jay busted out laughing, unable to hold it back any further. I let my head lull back as I groaned even louder.
We stopped in the front yard of the retirement home and looked up. Jessica's giant head was spinning up in the air as the sky behind her flashed its colors. This went on for a moment before Jessica's head finally stopped rotating. The sky returned to a white, opaque, and she began to talk.
"Hello everyone! It's me, Jessica! We have some updates for you, so I hope you're all listening very carefully. First, we'd like to congratulate all those who are still alive! We have successfully culled over twenty percent of your population in just the opening of the maze! The population is currently down to seventy-three percent of what it was, so we only have fifty-three percent more of you to get rid of before this nightmare is over!" This… made me ill instantly. How many millions was that? Just all dead. I looked over at my group, and both Church and Laura looked sick as well. Jay just kept looking up, expressionless. I wondered how often she had to witness this. Have any of her players died? This began a new list of questions, but Jessica continued on.
"With that update out of the way, we are now going to shake things up! First, your section of the maze is going to be refreshed with a new biome. Angel zombies are so passe anyway. Then we're going to raise the strength of all the monsters! I hope you've been leveling up. Otherwise, this is going to suuuuuuuuuck! Then, finally, we're going to create a world event in your section of the maze! Whatever it is, you're probably not going to like it! Now, let's find out what your new biome will be, shall we?" Two game tokens appeared next to Jessica's head and began the series of flips it had done all the way back in the beginning. We all stopped looking up and looked at each other. It was Laura who spoke first.
"Can we kill her?" she asked coldly. We were all shocked by this question and just looked at her. I wanted to ask if she was kidding, but her face said she wasn't. Jay had her mouth puckered and lips to the side, lost in thought. She was actually thinking!
"Yes, you can, but I'd not recommend trying. They can manipulate everything in this world as long as the game is going." Jay said. Laura raised her hand to her chin and began stroking it. She was lost in thought. Church was nervously petting Patti when he spoke up.
"Uh, Jay? What's a world event?" he asked.
"It's going to be a maze section-wide event, so not exactly worldwide, but it can involve something like we all need to fight something or do something, or else," Jay said. She had scooted closer to me, I had noticed, which was nice. I was starting to get anxious again. Did she know?
"Or else what?" Church asked nervously. He was now unconsciously feeding Patti a doggy treat, which she gladly took.
"Or else everyone in this maze section will die," Jay replied matter-of-factly. This brought Laura's attention back, and we all stared at Jay. "It's a way for them to get rid of huge swathes of the population at once." Church was looking sick, and I was feeling it. Holy shit. I was about to ask a question when Jessica's voice boomed.
"All done and decided! You all get one hour of respite as we adjust the biome! Your new biome is now…" Jessica stopped talking. What was she doing? Her eyes got wider, her smile even bigger and toothier.
"What is she doing?" I asked. I could see out of the peripherals of my eyes that Jay shrugged while looking up as well. "Is she, like, frozen?"
"MYTHICAL BEEFCAKES!!!" Jessica suddenly bellowed, scaring the crap out of us. "Once the biome is finished changing, we'll reveal the world event. Okay bye!" Jessica popped out of the sky, and a timer appeared where she was, counting down from an hour. We all stood for a moment, lost in thought, before we heard a cracking noise come from the inside of the retirement home.
"They're back," Jay said. Laura nodded and came up to me. She looked up sternly as she pointed a finger while she talked.
"Do NOT scare them again, bone boy!" she said. I narrowed my eyes at her.
"I'm a bone MAN, Laura!" I replied. Laura tried to keep a straight face as she choked back some laughter. Jay didn't attempt to hide her amusement and just openly giggled.
"Okay, bone man," Laura said. "Behave yourself. No more scaring grannies." She then walked past me toward the front door, with Patti running to join her side. I looked to Church, who just shrugged at me and started walking as well. I began to as well, with Jay walking next to me. I was still thinking about the beefcake thing. This shit was weird.