***
**City Z - The Forest Outskirts**
**Time: 3:30 PM (Tea Time)**
The forest was quiet, except for the sound of wood being shaved.
*Scrape. Scrape. Scrape.*
Saitama sat on a tree stump. In his left hand, he held a stick. In his right hand, he held **Yami's Katana**.
He was whittling.
"I need a toothpick," Saitama muttered, tongue poking out in concentration. "And we're out."
The legendary black blade—a weapon that had sliced demons, defied gravity, and poked holes in dimensions—was currently being used to shave a twig.
The sword vibrated. *Wub-wub.* It released a puff of purple smoke that smelled like a grimy pub.
"Quit complaining," Saitama tapped the blade. "You're dull anyway. I gotta push hard just to cut wood."
From the shadows of the tree canopy, eyes watched.
Speed-o'-Sound Sonic was crouching on a branch, vibrating with frustration.
"That buffoon..." Sonic whispered, gripping his ninjato. "He holds a blade of that caliber... to clean his teeth?!"
Sonic was a connoisseur of weapons. He could sense it. The metal in Saitama's hand wasn't Earth steel. It was heavy. Dense. It bled *Killing Intent* even when sitting still.
"He mocks the way of the sword," Sonic grinned, his grin stretching under his mask. "If I take that blade... I will be unstoppable."
*BOOM.*
Sonic broke the sound barrier.
***
**The Theft Attempt**
"Saitama!" Sonic roared, descending like a purple guillotine. "Hand over the cursed edge!"
Saitama didn't look up. He rotated the toothpick.
"Occupied."
Sonic landed, snatching for the katana handle.
"You're open!"
Sonic's fingers grazed the handle of Yami's sword.
*ZIZ-ZAP.*
"GAH!" Sonic screamed, recoiling.
Smoke rose from his gloves.
"What..." Sonic landed back on a rock, holding his smoking hand. "It... it burned me? Heat? No... weight?"
"I told the robot doctor not to touch it," Saitama finally looked up, inspecting his toothpick. "It's grumpy. It only likes people with low blood pressure or something."
Sonic scowled. "A sentient blade? Don't make me laugh. It's just a trick!"
Sonic drew his own sword. **Exploding Shuriken Barrage.**
He threw ten exploding stars.
Saitama sighed. "Noisy neighbor again."
He raised Yami's katana. He didn't swing it. He just held it up flat, like a shield.
The shurikens hit the broad side of the blade.
*Bang. Bang. Bang.*
The explosions detonated against the black steel. Smoke covered Saitama.
"Direct hit!" Sonic cheered. "Now, while he's blind—**Wind Blade Kick!**"
Sonic flew into the smoke.
*CLANK.*
Sonic's leg hit something hard.
The smoke cleared.
Saitama hadn't moved. But Genos stood in front of him.
Genos looked... different.
His shoulders were outfitted with honeycomb-patterned vents. The **Cyber-Grimoire** floated next to his head, projecting a holographic trap circle.
"**Rune-Tech: Trap Magic - Counter Shield.**"
Genos had downloaded the combat data of **Zora Ideale**.
The rune on Genos's chest glowed bright orange. It absorbed the kinetic energy of Sonic's kick, doubled it, and fired it back.
"Repelling Force."
*BAM.*
Sonic was launched backward by his own kick energy. He flew through three pine trees before sticking the landing (shakily).
"The tin can?" Sonic spat. "You got... tattoos?"
"They are inscriptions of the natural law," Genos stated, raising his arm. The Cyber-Grimoire flipped pages. "Clover Kingdom Database: Trap Magic. Efficiency Rating: High against agile targets who talk too much."
***
**Ninja vs. Mage-Borg**
"Don't mock me!" Sonic moved. **Ten-Fold Funeral.**
Ten clones of Sonic appeared, circling Genos at Mach speed.
"Speed determines the victor!" Sonic laughed. "Your sensors can't track ten of me!"
Genos closed his eyes (or rather, shuttered his optics).
"Ki Detection: Active."
He didn't need cameras. He used the skill Asta had rambled about for three weeks. The ability to sense life flow.
"Target Locked. The real one..."
Genos pointed to the Sonic on the far left.
"...Is wearing silk boxers."
Sonic froze. The clones vanished.
"H-How do you know my underwear fabric?!"
"The Ki signature of high-quality silk is distinct," Genos explained deadpan (he made that up, he just x-rayed him). "Master Saitama, shall I eliminate the nuisance?"
Saitama stood up. He tucked the toothpick into his belt.
"Let me handle it," Saitama said. "He wants the sword. Let's give him the sword."
Saitama gripped Yami's Katana with both hands.
Sonic stiffened. *He's taking a stance? The bald amateur?*
"Okay, sword," Saitama whispered to the hilt. "That angry ninja guy is annoying. Do the scary thing."
Saitama stepped forward.
The atmosphere in the forest changed. The birds stopped singing. The wind died.
The Ki in the sword—the remnant of Yami Sukehiro—woke up. It felt Sonic's intent. It felt the desire to kill. And Yami (even as a ghost in a sword) really hated try-hards.
Saitama didn't swing fast. He swung heavy.
**"Killer Move."**
The purple aura on the blade expanded. It took shape. Behind Saitama, a massive, shadowy silhouette of a muscular man holding a cigarette appeared.
Sonic's eyes went wide. *An Illusion?! No... Spiritiual Pressure!*
**"Serious Series: Serious... Intimidation."**
Saitama swung the sword downward.
He stopped it an inch from Sonic's nose.
The blade didn't touch him.
But the *Shadow Yami* behind the swing did. The aura "slapped" Sonic's soul.
*WHAM.*
It wasn't physical pain. It was the feeling of being trapped in a bathroom with a demon who just ran out of toilet paper. It was the feeling of crushing despair.
Sonic's brain flooded with images: *Getting stuck in the toilet. Being unable to open a pickle jar. Losing his scarf.*
"AAAAHHH!" Sonic shrieked, clutching his chest. "THE MENTAL DAMAGE! IT'S DARK! IT SMELLS LIKE ASH!"
Sonic collapsed to his knees, sweating profusely.
"What..." Sonic panted. "What technique... is that?"
Saitama sheathed the sword. *Click.*
"It's called 'The Landlord's Glare'," Saitama said. "It makes you want to pay rent and leave."
Sonic looked at the sword with genuine terror now.
"That isn't steel," Sonic whispered. "That's a vessel of trauma."
He stood up, legs wobbling.
"I... I will retrain," Sonic declared, wrapping his scarf tight. "I cannot defeat the Curse yet. But mark my words, Saitama! I will find a blade darker than yours!"
*POOF.*
Sonic vanished in a smoke bomb.
Saitama waved the smoke away.
"Finally," Saitama picked up his toothpick.
"Genos."
"Yes, Master?"
"Did we buy apples? I want to test if the sword can peel fruit."
"Negative. We purchased sale-price turnips."
"Turnips..." Saitama sighed. "The Sword hates turnips. It always cuts them crooked."
Genos opened his Grimoire.
"I shall download a peeling tutorial, Master."
***
**Bonus Scene: The Mumen Rider Upgrade**
Later that evening.
Saitama and Genos were walking back to the apartment. They passed Mumen Rider, the Cyclist for Justice.
Mumen was sitting on the curb, looking at his bike, *Justice*. The chain was broken.
"Hey, Saitama!" Mumen waved cheerfully, despite the grease on his face. "Just a little tune-up. Justice never sleeps, but it does rust!"
Genos stopped. He looked at the bike.
He remembered the Heart Kingdom. He remembered **Gadjah** reinforcing metal with runes.
"Cyclist," Genos approached.
"Oh, Genos-kun!"
"Your vehicle lacks efficiency," Genos stated. "Permit me."
Genos placed a hand on the bike frame. His chest runes glowed blue.
"**Machine Magic: Reinforcement Script - Wind.**"
He burned a small, glowing green rune onto the bike's handlebars.
"There. Friction reduction: 40%."
Mumen blinked. "Uh... thanks?"
Mumen hopped on the bike. He pushed the pedal gently.
*ZOOM.*
The bike shot forward. It left a trail of green sparks.
"WOAAAHH!" Mumen screamed as he blasted down the street at 60 mph. "JUSTICE IS TOO FAST! HOW DO I BRAKE?!"
Saitama watched Mumen drift around a corner like he was in *Tokyo Drift*.
"You just created a hazard," Saitama said.
"I increased his justice efficiency," Genos corrected.
"Let's go home, Genos. I'm hungry."