Megumin kept dousing her head under cold water, the red glow spilling from her eyes like a flame burning underwater. Once she stripped off her clothes, her fair, delicate body turned out to be covered in kiss marks — a sorry sight, though she'd left plenty of marks on Jhin too. Call the battle an even draw. The only difference was that Jhin had backup in the form of the captain of the emergency fire-fighting squad, and Megumin didn't.
Over the days that followed, Yuiyui shut the two of them into a room alone again and again, by every method she could devise, and every time Jhin teased Megumin halfway, then broke out through the window and went off to study Teleportation Magic.
The others gradually got used to the world going black without warning, or to drinking tea laced with sleeping powder and waking up the next morning.
After one such fire-fighting run, Kyaru complained to him, "Could you two hurry up and get it over with? At this rate I'm going to build up a resistance to Sleep Magic and a drug tolerance!"
"I am working on it... You know what Megumin's stubborn streak is like. It should be over in the next few days."
"It had better be." Kyaru huffed twice, sweet and petulant, and buried her face in his chest to sleep.
These days Megumin's eyes glowed like light bulbs from dawn to dusk, and whenever she laid eyes on Jhin they came within a hair of firing actual lasers. Most of that had to do with the way the two of them kept tormenting each other.
At first she hadn't caught on to what he was really after, but as the days went by there was no way she could miss it.
You think you can make me give in like a good little girl with a trick like that? Not a chance!
The moment her competitive streak took her reason hostage, a long war of attrition between them became inevitable.
What Jhin hadn't counted on was that the unexpected always arrives precisely when you're least expecting it.
One peaceful morning, while everyone was eating breakfast and speculating about how they'd be knocked out today, Yuiyui made an announcement.
"That Yunyun girl should be coming home about now."
"Who's Yunyun?" It was the first time Pecorine had heard the name, and curiosity made her set down her chopsticks.
"She's a friend of Megu—"
Megumin cut her mother off, snapping, "She's a woman with big boobs and nothing between her ears."
Jhin did remember the name — Mother-in-law had mentioned it in one of her letters. Megumin's favorite rival, more or less?
"What's she coming back for? I thought she went out adventuring too." Megumin chewed on her thumb, sour-faced, the leg she'd crossed jiggling nonstop.
The two of them were practically the same age, yet they'd developed on entirely different scales, which was one of the reasons Yunyun rubbed her the wrong way.
Unhurried as ever, Yuiyui lifted her cup, took a sip of tea, and cast a sidelong glance at the daughter she had long since privately written off as a "total lost cause." "The village chief called her back. Apparently he's arranging a marriage interview for her."
"Ha! Who's she meeting? When? Where?" Megumin fought down a grin as she pumped her mother for details.
Right now she wanted nothing more than to see that idiot standing helpless in front of a strange man. Surely it would be a laugh on par with [Explosion magic].
Of course, that was purely incidental! Purely incidental to making sure the man didn't sweet-talk her into anything. If the clan chief's daughter got swindled off by some stranger, think of the shame it would bring on the Crimson Demon Clan.
"Two days from now. They'll be meeting at the village's one and only sweets shop, I believe."
To keep from howling with laughter, Megumin pinched her own thigh hard enough that the pain squeezed a few tears from the corners of her eyes — the very picture of a girl moved that her dearest friend had finally found someone. "Mom, can I bring Jhin along to watch?"
"No problem at all. It's around ten in the morning, so don't be late."
"As her closest friend, there is no chance I would be late or absent for an occasion like this!"
Yuiyui set down her teacup with a beaming smile, like an old hunter waiting for the snare to spring. "Is that so? Good, then."
Having fully embraced her new role as a gleeful spectator, Megumin thought of nothing but watching Yunyun humiliate herself, and the fire that had been raging inside her cooled considerably — her temper along with it.
As for the flower pastries, Jhin's original plan had been to start on them the moment the cherry-blossom preserve had cured for two or three days. But between Mother-in-law's endless schemes, he'd had almost no time to teach Pecorine how to make the shortening paste and the pastry skins, so the project kept getting pushed back. Fortunately, cherry-blossom preserve only improves the longer it ferments, so there was no danger of it spoiling.
His plan was to wait until Megumin couldn't hold out any longer and the two of them had made real, substantive progress. Then he'd make the cherry-blossom pastries, and by that point Mother-in-law would have no reason to keep tormenting them.
To everyone's surprise, Yuiyui went those two whole days without knocking anybody out with Sleep Magic or sleeping powder, as though she were deliberately letting Jhin and Megumin rest so they could turn up in peak condition to spectate at Yunyun's marriage interview.
"Mmm~" Kyaru stretched, filled with a contentment she couldn't quite put into words. "Life's so good when you don't have to worry about eating a Sleep Magic."
"Mm-hm, mm-hm, mm-hm." Pecorine nodded hard enough to rattle her teeth. She had seen straight through to the scheming nature hiding under Yuiyui's gentle young-wife exterior, and she patted her tummy, still a little shaken. "If that had gone on much longer, I might have actually gotten fat. All I did every day was eat and sleep."
Kokkoro, who was reading Komekko a story from a picture book, caught their conversation and smiled. "It does suggest that Master and Megumin's relationship has had a breakthrough."
"No, you're reading too much into it. As far as I know, they're still stuck in their tug-of-war."
"Eh? Kyaru, is that true?"
"Of course it's true. A certain someone still comes looking for me every single night." With a child like Komekko in the room, Kyaru chose a more roundabout way of putting it.
"Then why did Auntie Yuiyui—"
"Who knows? Either way, being able to sleep normally is a good thing."
"Jhin and Megumin should be at the sweets shop by now, right?"
"Probably. They left a good ten-odd minutes ago."
Jhin let Megumin drag him along at a hurried pace toward their destination. Honestly, marriage interviews held no interest for him whatsoever; reading with Kokkoro would have been more fun.
But Megumin was his girlfriend too, so tagging along to watch the show was the least he could do.
"There's no need to rush. We left half an hour early — how about we slow down?"
"What do you know? This is a golden chance to watch that idiot make a fool of herself. Knowing her, she'll show up early, and if the man shows up early too, we'd miss the whole performance for nothing."
"Sometimes I do wonder who you picked up that nasty streak from."
"Ha?" Megumin's voice shifted register; she arched an eyebrow and glanced back at him. "Wasn't it you who corrupted me?"
"...I'd rather use the word 'trained' than 'corrupted.'"
"Go die, you jerk."
Bickering the entire way, the two of them arrived at the sweets shop with its witch-themed decor. Megumin shoved the door open, too impatient to wait, and as the bell above it jingled, the "dearest friend" she'd been mocking rose from behind a table, trotted straight over to Jhin, and seized his right hand. "You're Mr. Jhin, aren't you? I— I'm Yunyun, and I'll do my very best to bear your children!"
____
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🔥 New history: Zenless Zone Zero: The Retired Void Hunter — posted on The_Mikudayo