── It didn't take long for me to realize that I was standing in the middle of a complex battlefield—or rather, a "tense deadlock."
"I apologize for the delay, but to think things would escalate to the point of summoning the Prefect Team... Subaru! You'd better explain exactly what is going on here... ──"(Aru)
Aru burst through the doors with a flourish, but the bizarre atmosphere in the room instantly silenced her. She stood there, frozen and aghast.
(W-What kind of situation have we stumbled into!? This is embarrassing... so incredibly embarrassing!) (Aru)
"U-Um, can we... sit down for a moment?" (Aru)
"...Madam President, you are being far too timid." (Kayoko)
"Ahahaha! We're here to cause some trouble!" (Mutsuki)
To Kanna and Sena, the newcomers looked like nothing more than a band of criminals. However, since they were allies who had gathered around Subaru, everyone remained silent.
Aru wasn't the only one confused. There were others who hadn't fully grasped the current situation: the Abydos students, Serika and Ayane, and the Director of the Valkyrie Police Academy's Public Security Bureau, Ogata Kanna.
"Ahem... honestly... I'm not exactly sure how to put this, but..." (Kanna)
"── Mr. Natsuki, if you are hiding something, it would be best for you to speak truthfully." (Kanna)
"Ugh..." (Subaru)
Kanna had gone to arrest the Director after learning his location from Subaru. Following the arrest, under Takanashi Hoshino's guidance, she had taken refuge at Abydos Academy before the sandstorm intensified... but questions remained.
The Director's location had been a closely guarded secret. Even Kanna herself, who was supposed to be his ally, had known nothing about it.
"...Is there even a point to us being here?" (Serika)
"This seems like a heavy conversation. Let's just listen from the corner..." (Ayane)
The two younger girls retreated, whispering to each other as they cleared the floor for the discussion. With that, Subaru lost his final "safe" exit.
Where should he start? What should he say? How was he supposed to act?
He scanned the room desperately, but found no mercy. Not in Shiroko's face, nor Hoshino's, nor even in Kanna's sharp gaze, Sena's piercing eyes, or Aru's stunned expression.
"Q..." (Subaru)
"Q-Question! Let me answer in a Q&A format!! I can't explain everything from the beginning, and even this old-timer Hoshino and the others wouldn't be able to process it all right now anyway, right!?" (Subaru)
"Yeah, yeah, you've got a point~" (Hoshino)
"── However, I think you can talk about those wounds of yours right now." (Hoshino)
── A direct hit.
She brought up the one topic Subaru wanted to avoid most. The scars left by his battles could only be explained by admitting to "reckless idiocy."
Kanna's eyes flashed with a sharp light. In this room, only Kanna and Sena—who had transported his unconscious body earlier—knew the truth about Subaru's escape from the hospital. Sena's face paled as she noticed the terrifying increase in unexplained injuries.
As Kanna rose from her seat, Subaru tried to stand up to calm her, but──
"Regarding the wounds, I'm the one who needs to ask questions first." (Sena)
Sena gripped his shoulder and pressed down, leaving Subaru with no way to escape his place on the executioner's block.
"── Weren't you supposed to be a hospital inpatient? The wound in your abdomen hasn't even closed yet. I was shocked to find you there when I went to treat what I was told was a "fresh corpse."" (Sena)
"Your abdominal wound has reopened, you have two new gunshot wounds, and the scarring and lacerations on your arm have worsened so severely that it might be permanently disabled. I've removed the bullets, but... the fact that your internal organs haven't failed yet is a miracle in itself." (Sena)
"For the sake of my future research, I must ask: what kind of bodily neglect leads to this state? Or is this the result of a specific weapon...?" (Sena)
── It was over.
The time for the excuses Subaru had been planning had run out.
He wanted to believe Sena's questions stemmed from pure medical curiosity—how he escaped, and how an emergency medic should handle a patient arriving with such injuries in the future... but her gaze said otherwise.
"── That said, if you went out there intended to become a corpse by your own will, then from a medical standpoint, I have nothing more to say to you." (Sena)
"I am so sorry!!" (Subaru)
"An apology... does that mean you have something to hide?" (Sena)
There was no hiding it; the eyes fixed on Subaru grew even colder and more demanding.
He had no more excuses. Subaru possessed no romantic grace, no epic heroism, not even a single rose in his hand. How could he hope for a moment of peace here?
── Recognizing Subaru's struggle, Kanna shook her golden hair and stepped forward with a proposal.
"Can we exchange information first? There is much I still don't understand. Why did the Prefect Team come to Abydos? What exactly has happened until now? I want us to share all of that first, and then we can discuss things in the "Question and Answer" format Mr. Natsuki suggested." (Kanna)
"This lady has already told us the truth about his injuries. Can we not postpone the pressure regarding them until we finish the briefing?" (Kanna)
"...That's fine. But, Madam Director, I'll need you to tell me in detail about your relationship with Kaiser as well." (Hoshino)
"I don't mind. My career is over the moment the President of the Sanctum Tower returns anyway. There's no longer any reason for secrecy." (Kanna)
"Takanashi Hoshino-san, may we use the room next door?" (Kanna)
Hoshino glanced around the room, appearing lost in thought. She let out a soft sigh, thinking of the people who hadn't yet arrived.
The people Subaru and Shiroko had brought back weren't just from the Prefect Team; there were students from Highlander Academy as well. Knowing how that happened and the nature of the connection with the Public Security Director would make the whole story much easier to swallow.
Subaru stood paralyzed, frozen by a terror that left him unable to move. It was no wonder. Hoshino rose, her emotions clear on her face, and spoke:
"Subaru, wait here a moment." (Hoshino)
"Understood." (Subaru)
"Alright everyone, follow me." (Hoshino)
Hoshino led the others out of the room. As she left with the students and Kanna, Subaru and Kanna's eyes met briefly. He gave her a small nod—a gesture carrying a sincere apology and a profound sense of gratitude, the kind of relief one feels when unexpectedly finding a ten-thousand-yen note on the street. It was a thankfulness that overflowed from his heart.
Once Kanna's golden animal ears vanished from sight, only Subaru and Sena remained in the room.
"Hm? Shouldn't you be going too, Sena?" (Subaru)
"I am staying to ensure a quick response should Mr. Natsuki's health suddenly take a turn for the worse. Besides, you are still my patient; that fact hasn't changed. I will leave the briefing... to the others." (Sena)
"...Thank you. Last time... ah, I was unconscious." (Subaru)
"Or rather, you were a corpse on the verge of death, I believe." (Sena)
"Is there a state worse than being a corpse!? "A corpse on the verge of death"... I still don't understand your criteria for calling me a cadaver..." (Subaru)
"As usual, we haven't spoken enough for these words to feel familiar. In fact, our exchange during the last battle was our very first conversation." (Sena)
Subaru scratched his cheek, embarrassed by his slip of the tongue, and shifted restlessly to hide his awkwardness.
Sena's gaze sharpened, looking at him as if he had committed the ultimate transgression against a patient. Subaru swallowed hard and rested his elbows on the table.
He never knew when an accidental slip of the tongue might summon "that entity" again—that black sphere, that void, that incomprehensible thing that appeared in response to the words "Return by Death." Through countless failures, he had realized that even approaching the subject was like stepping on a hair-trigger landmine.
Kanna's clever intervention really saved me. If we had kept talking while I was in that panic, I might have let something slip.
"..."
"Sena." (Subaru)
"Yes, what is it?" (Sena)
"Heh, I just wanted to say your name." (Subaru)
The sudden silence that blanketed the room sent a pang of unease through his heart. Silence itself had begun to terrify him. It was a cold, frightening thing; he felt as though he might shatter if he didn't feel the warmth of another human presence.
"The room next door must be pretty loud right now... Man, I'm actually scared of the moment they come back." (Subaru)
"If a new corpse appears here, I will treat it. You can rest easy." (Sena)
"── Does psychological support fall under the Emergency Medical Division's jurisdiction too?" (Subaru)
Originally, he hadn't feared loneliness. Silence didn't scare him. Even in a dark room, alone, in total isolation—even if he discarded the warmth and happiness of his family—he hadn't felt cold or stifled.
── Because the lives lost and the silence that followed would call out Subaru's name, take his hand, and try to stay with him.
"Yes. Medicine is not limited to the body alone. The frequency of death on the battlefield leaves deep scars on the soul, creating immense psychological pressure on the patient." (Sena)
"Therefore, the Emergency Medical Division may use military force against the direct causes of death in the field. We must also study psychological theory for the sake of treatment." (Sena)
"As proof of that effort, my body feels incredibly vital. You've done a monumental job, Sena... ──" (Subaru)
"Mr. Natsuki." (Sena)
── Natsuki Subaru had become this fragile.
"I noticed something during the examination. Right now... your sense of pain is non-functional. Even if your wounds heal completely, you will not be "fine."" (Sena)
"No, no, I've really recovered thanks to you, Sena. Besides, everyone returned safely. My heart is full of that right now." (Subaru)
"Even so, we cannot ignore lost functions." (Sena)
Sena reached out from behind and placed her fingers on Subaru's cheek. Her fingertips, full of tenderness and care, touched the bandage over the scratch on his cheek, stroking it gently.
It felt like rubbing a rubber ball. Although her hands were in his line of sight, he didn't actually perceive that he was being touched... it triggered a strange doubt as to whether he, as an entity, truly existed.
Subaru didn't even feel a tickle. Not knowing how to respond, he simply sat there, his body trembling slightly from embarrassment.
"Your sense of pain is gone, which means you have lost your sense of touch." (Sena)
"The causes vary... but in Mr. Natsuki's case, the root is likely psychological stress. As part of your treatment, we will..." (Sena)
Sena reached out and touched Subaru's arm through his clothes. She was careful not to become a burden, lightly stroking his arm, repeating the motion with both hands.
""Remember." Let's remember the sense of touch. Even if the sensation is absent... you are being touched right now, Mr. Natsuki." (Sena)
"The fact that you are being touched means that I am the one touching you. I have seen similar cases before. If the boundaries of the self vanish... the soul bears a burden equal to that disappearance." (Sena)
Sena moved her hand from his arm to his neck, then across his collarbone to his chest. With fluid motions, she felt the beat of his heart with her palm. She then removed her black gloves, revealing beautiful, warm hands to Subaru.
When she placed her bare hand on his chest, he realized it. With her hand resting there, the sound of his heartbeat should have echoed in his ears—but he heard nothing.
It wasn't that he had stopped feeling flustered by the touch of a beautiful girl, or that he had grown used to it ──he would never get used to it── but failing to hear his own heartbeat... it made him feel as though he weren't alive.
He realized now, however late, that it wasn't just his sense of pain that had dulled, but his very senses themselves.
"I'm being touched ── I see. Sena, you're touching me..." (Subaru)
He muttered it as if stating the obvious.
"Yes, I am touching you." (Sena)
She replied with an equally obvious fact.
"Is the treatment this physical contact?" (Subaru)
"Yes... this is part of the treatment. If it proves ineffective, we will try another method..." (Sena)
"No, I think this is the most effective one." (Subaru)
"Then I hope you will seek contact with others as well, not just me. I cannot always take charge of Mr. Natsuki's treatment; I am returning to Gehenna tomorrow." (Sena)
Natsuki Subaru had become fragile. He now understood why the cold felt cold, why the warmth felt warm, and the difference between being alone and being in isolation.
Natsuki Subaru had become incredibly fragile; he had learned the meaning of precious things being precious, and he began to accept the things he had once ignored and tried not to see.
── And so, Natsuki Subaru matured slightly, transitioning from a boy into a man.
"As a member of the Medical Division, I am responsible for treating the patient, Mr. Natsuki. Since I have accepted you as my patient, my mission is to see you return to health. Then, I will go look for another fresh corpse." (Sena)
"Until you truly recover, you will remain my patient, Mr. Natsuki." (Sena)
"I get it, I get it. Fine, I'll leave the treatment to you... let this be for the sake of the Medical Division's research!" (Subaru)
"You too, Mr. Natsuki, must touch something. In the absence of sensation, your every movement will rust." (Sena)
She suggested that he continue the "treatment" until the others returned, and even thereafter. Flustered by Sena's bluntness and sincerity, Subaru nodded in agreement.
And so, Subaru continued his treatment to rekindle his lost sense of touch, locking eyes with Sena for a long while.
●○●○●
""""What is the meaning of this!?""""
"── What on earth!?" (Aru)
"── My, my, what do we have here?" (Hoshino)
"── What do you mean by this?" (Ayane)
"── Maybe..." (Shiroko)
"Waaa... ah..." (Mutsuki)
── The time for treatment and tranquility had come to a violent end.
Four girls burst into the room with terrifying expressions while Subaru was still in the middle of his session with Sena. His heart nearly leaped out of his chest in fright. Since everyone had caught him in that compromising position, Aru screamed, her face turning a bright, burning crimson.
"Wait! What are you doing while we're gone!?" (Aru)
"It's not what you think! This is treatment! I'm telling you, it's medical treatment!" (Subaru)
"Does such a treatment even exist in this world...!?" (Aru)
"It is indeed treatment. Mr. Natsuki is currently suffering from sensory paralysis—he can feel neither pain nor touch." (Sena)
"...What?" (Aru)
"── Did you truly think it was normal for him to show no signs of pain while in such a wretched state?" (Sena)
"Sena, Sena! Stop! Please, stop! I'll talk about my body later! If we let this conversation branch out any further, we'll lose control of the situation!" (Subaru)
Subaru was on the verge of tears. He desperately tried to pivot the conversation, sensing that things were about to get much worse. He wanted to ask why they had rushed into the room, but...
"What did you just say?" (Shiroko)
"Shi... roko..." (Subaru)
── He realized then, however late, that the opportunity had already passed.
By the time all the members of Problem Solver 68 and the other students entered, they had surrounded Subaru like an animal in a cage.
"Mr. Natsuki, our discussion has only made the mysteries deeper. Can you explain everything? And about your wounds—yes, I entrusted you with my weapon and my feelings, but I never said a single word that gave you a license for recklessness. On the contrary, your body is far weaker than others. I gave you that weapon to be a true last resort. Why did you commit such idiocy!? Even that radio broadcast... you clearly don't care about yourself at all." (Kanna)
"Subaru, we talked before about the outlaw lifestyle... ── and while I think sacrificing one's life for a noble rage is magnificent, what you're doing... is nothing but self-contempt. Even back then, when you were shot in the stomach and collapsed, did you think about the look on Hina Sorasaki's face?... To me, she looked like she was about to cry. Her face was twisted with pain and helplessness. Is that what a proper outlaw looks like to you, Subaru?" (Aru)
"Nn... even when you went to rescue Nonomi... ── Subaru, you're being far too reckless, aren't you?" (Shiroko)
"Subaru, I believed in you because you said you'd protect that promise... but I don't want to get my students back through your sacrifice. I don't want you to gamble with your life. Do you understand? I don't want my students to experience what I went through—to have our lives built upon your sacrifice... ── how cruel would that be? Still, I realize the situation forced your hand. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for bringing back Serika and Ayane. And though I've guessed as much, you probably took the train to the outskirts for Nonomi's sake, didn't you? I'm grateful for that too. So for now, I'll only say this: "Thank you, but let's think about this for a moment, kid."" (Hoshino)
"Y-Yes... sir... understood..." (Subaru)
"...I...! I found strength and hope in Mr. Natsuki's words...!" (Ayane)
"...The fact that you saved us doesn't change, so I won't say anything... ── Hoshino-senpai said it all." (Serika)
"Ayane... Serika..." (Subaru)
Having finally received the scolding he had long postponed, the "slightly matured" Subaru was weeping inside a soul that remained, for the most part, a child's.
── Yet, the realization that the actual "interrogation" hadn't even begun was enough to make his tears fall even faster.
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