Jones woke up from getting concussed by some trust fund baby, but before he could even think about stepping foot on McDonald's Island, Biggie McDonald Duck Jr. showed up, ready to ruin Jones' hopes and dreams of forcing Buck to finally see he's not completely worthless. Before Jones could even fully comprehend that someone was in front of him, Biggie Jr. ripped a megaphone out of a child's hands and screamed: "KINDAPPER! THE KIDNAPPER IS HERE! THIS IS THE KIDNAPPER THE SNITCH GAVE CLASSIFIED GOVERNMENT INFORMATION TO FOR THE SOLE PURPOSE OF FALSE VALIDATION! NOW HIDE YOUR KIDS AND HELP ME OR YOU'RE GAY!"
Predictably, everyone dropped what they were doing and begging Biggie Jr. for orders. But understandably, Biggie Jr. didn't trust the bums he was forced to house on his father's island to not majorly fuck up at the simplest tasks, so he just told them off and he and 3 military soldiers dragged Biggie to the only prison on the island. While Jones was trying to get out of the rope Biggie Jr. tied to his chair and mouth, he was talking fast with the warden.
Biggie Jr: "This is the guy that got the information so he could kidnap one of our own. We haven't found the snitch yet but this is a start. Now we have more time to find the snitch before he can pass things on to another person."
Warden: "And... the fuck am I supposed to do? You know, this might be hard for a guy like you to comprehened given your father did everything for you and in general is what they would call an umbrella parent in Sweden."
Biggie Jr (genuinely flabbergasted by Warden's words): "What your incompetent ass needs to do is to get the snitch under your control before things get worse! Now get to damn work and do my job for me already!"
Unfortunately for Biggie Jr., just as he finished shotuing those very words, Jones broke the very cheap rope they used, picked up an Automag dropped by some dumbass guard who is probably raging at Fortnite as we speak and was now making a run for his dear life, but Biggie Jr. had one last trick up his sleeve, and Jones was dead wrong if he thought Biggie Jr. would allow him to run so easily and so soon.
Biggie Jr: (tackles Jones to the floor and pins him down. A half-competent security guard joins) "Oh no you don't, buddy. Did you really think I'd let you off as easy as that, lil' bro?"
Jones: "One, I'm not falling for the ragebait, and two, yes, I can get off as easily as you want? You know why? Because I am an American citizen, and I have basic human rights" (Punches Biggie Jr. in the face and runs)
Biggie Jr (just as Jones is about to run out of the door): "You see that door you're trying to run out of? There's some sprays that'll give you rare, incurable tropical diseases 100% guaranteed, you'll never be able to go back to America if you go out of that door instead of accepting your prison sentence."
Jones stared at him for a long moment. A very long moment. Jones was debating what he was gonna do. First thing to come to his mind was something that would make Buck pretend he never knew him. It simply was against Buck's beliefs and he couldn't fathom anyone he thought mattered even thinking about it. What was that thing you ask? Accepting defeat. Yes, Buck thought that was plain stupid. Because nothing screams "I'M A LITTLE PUSSY" by acknowledging that either you fucked up or your opponent is better, at least according to Buck. And don't even try running off, because although Biggie Jr. bluffed a lot, but he was not bluffing this time.
That left only one possible option: Jones, without a second thought put a hand on Biggie Jr. then wrapped both his hands around his neck, and before Biggie Jr. could process anything, Jones had him in a chokehold and was squeezing the air out of him. It would've been the perfect murder for Jones, but unfortunately for him, Biggie Jr. managed one high-pitched scream before Jones nearly crushed his neck. The sheer force made Biggie Jr. drop the button for the incurable disease sprayers at the front door, and it broke immediately, sounding like it was dying.
The combination of these two got the attention of just about everyone on the island, and they stormed the prison's front door, trying to pry Jones off their lord and savior. Yes, none of them gave a fuck he was verbally abusive towards everyone one of them.
Unfortunately, Jones saw them and acted faster. Just as one of the residents was about to make contact with the two, Jones held up Biggie Jr. (Jones was training for bodybuilding before Buck locked him in his basement) and threw him at the residents as if he was a dodgeball. Then, without hesitation, he ran for Biggie Jr.'s son, the only kid he'd ever have, got part of a Burger King Pokeball stuck covering his mouth and nose so he couldn't cry for help. Then, he pulled out the Glock he kept hidden and started pointing it directly at Biggie Jr's crying son, screaming about showing him the Lord if anyone dared to move even a singular step. For a moment, it seemed like Jones' empty threat would actually work. For a long while came utter silence. It was after a few long minutes that someone finally made a move.
Biggie Jr: (grabs his laptop, the same one Jones gave to the guy in the rainforest but with better Incognito Mode) "Here, take my laptop. I know you gave some horny guy this kind of laptop for drugs, which you gave a guy for passage to the island. It's the same model, but it has better Incognito. Just, please. Let my son live. He has a whole life ahead of him, and I can't have any more kids."
For just a moment, Jones took a good look at Biggie Jr.'s offering. He was seriously considering. It was indeed very tempting. But against all the voices in his head, all his desire, he told Biggie Jr. he could take that laptop and shove it up his ass and made a run for it.
Without even thinking, Biggie Jr. hit up all his friends so they could gangbang him, but by then, Jones was inside the bunker where King is (if you don't remember him, it doesn't matter), getting past the fingerprint verification and locking the door on both sides, pocketing the emergency key that only worked if the biometric thingy decided the emergency key should work.
Scared shitless that Whataburger Island would become safer than McDonald's Island if Jones actually did anything, he rushed to his iPad, got up the UN website, submitted his credentials and logged into his UN account as the leader of an eligible nation. He rushed towards the "Submit Report" tab exclusive to eligible leaders, and found the "Declare a Single-Nation Emergency" and "Declare a Global Emergency" buttons. He chose the latter.
Biggie Jr: (through the voice recorder) "ATTENTION, EVERYONE. THE KIDNAPPER HAS COME. I REPEAT THE KIDNAPPER HAS COME. WE HAVEN'T FOUND THE SNITCH BUT THE KIDNAPPER HAS COME. EVERYONE SEND HELP AND BOW DOWN TO YOUR SUPERIOR."
There was a thing, though: The United Nations didn't just let any emergency request go through with no question. Far too many kids hacked into such accounts and uploaded files of farting noises for that. Now, thanks to those kids, every, and I mean every single emergency request now had to get approval of the United Nations Secretary-General Antonio Guterres, and let's just say he didn't feel like doing anything today.
To put it in simple terms: After Guterres pissed off Biggie Jr. by denying his request, he begrudgingly agreed to call only a single-nation emergency (which didn't need approval from the Secretary-General)
Meanwhile, the military for McDonald's Island were breaking into peoples' homes, trying to physically drag these lazy fucks off their phones so they would something valuable with their lives for once. Safe to say that didn't work.
Meanwhile, Jones disrupted King and his daughter, who were just trying to watch TV peacefully.
Without so much as somewhat of a warning, Jones grabbed King's daughter off the couch, and threatened to send someone's kind to the Lord for the second time in this chapter- ahem, I mean for the second time today. King, the first person who actually cared about someone that wasn't himself, didn't just let Jones hold his daughter and gunpoint and swing her as if she were a ragdoll bought off of Temu.
King: "Hey! You, bitch boy! You better lay your dirty hands off my daughter, and for the next time we meet, if you got a problem with me, say it to my fucking face instead of using every innocent bystander findable as some pawn in your deranged little game. Oh, and what a fucking shame it would be if I had to use some of my wrestling moves on you. I've been dominating in the WWE when I played, and I may not have played for 20 years or something, but that ain't the same as being washed-"
Jones: (firing a warning shot into the ground) "Yeah, if you couldn't tell, I mean business."
King: (gulps)
Jones: "That's what I thought."
King: "Fine. Do you what gotta do."
As such, Jones threw his daughter out of the window like a raging gamer and a computer, dragged King by the feet, unlocked the bunker with his key, swallowed it, and threw King into a boat, where Jones' compadres were waiting.
The minute Jones threw King, they started the engine of their jetski and were speeding fast as fuck. One Coast Guard officer tried to chase them. The jetski turned so fast the Coast Guard officer's boat spontaneously combusted. The jetski arrived at a bunker owned by Buck, which actually didn't take that long. Biggie Jr. wasn't able to finish his alleged "emergency announcement", which really did piss him off.
Once Jones and the rest of Buck's henchman got to the bunker, they threw Jones onto a chair, strapped him to it with the mouth tape he had over before, and they huddled over King. Just staring. Menacingly.
It didn't take long for them to start threatening him with literally everything under the sun. They told him he'd see the Lord, that they'd ruin his life, they'd make him lose the little things he did have left, all that shit, demanding they do what they want. And King did agree, on one condition: They imprison every board member that contributed to his arrest and make the new board reinstate him permanently into the WWE and additionally clear his false drug abuse notation on his WWE career record. His words.
The officials, who weren't used to compromise, started threatening him even harder, demanding he do what they want for free, no questions asked, just obedience, but King showed them he had C4 strapped all over the bunker. Safe to say, the officials were much less demanding afterwards.
5 minutes later, the government officials did what King demanded, much thanks to the WWE folding under no pressure, and now they had the grounds to demand King does what they want him to do: Organize a fight between The Re4lDe4l and The Death Note, dorime'ing in their minds The Death Note would obliterate The Re4lDe4l into oblivion.
(45 minutes later)
Okay, they said his plan was good enough and they'd put it into fruition, but I can't give details. I was watching the new MrBeast video. Yeah, sorry. (Not actually sorry)