"Oh!" Umbridge groaned as she woke up, she started rubbing the side of her head, feeling a slight stinging sensation. "What...what happened?" She said, blinking repeatedly before trying to recall her memory of what happened last night. She remembered walking up to her office, sitting down and enjoying a nice cup of tea...but not much after that. Had she fallen asleep? "Hmm, I must have been more tired than I thought." She said to herself before she looked around and smiled at the way her office was decorated, it was just perfect as far as she was concerned.
She yawned and began stretching when she suddenly heard the sound of talking, she frowned as she realised it was coming from outside of her office. Why were the little brats here already? It was far too early to begin dealing with those snotty nosed children.
She took out her wand and cast a tempus spell to check the time, her eyes widened to near comical sizes when she saw that she was already ten minutes late for her first class! She let out a noise that - despite what she might believe - was a squeak, before quickly getting up and rushing out of her office to get to her class, thankfully for her it was only a door away.
In the defence against the dark arts classroom, Harry was sat with the other students, except he was sat at the back with Daphne. Thor wasn't with him as Harry had instructed the little bird to go and hang out with 'Auntie Hedwig', mostly because Harry was admittedly a little bit protective over Thor seeing as he was still quite young and didn't really want to have Thor near Umbridge anymore than necessary, Jet had agreed of course.
"We are not letting that fat frog traumatize my nephew!" Jet had said in a very firm voice.
As of the moment Harry was leaning back in his chair, Daphne was leaning against him with her head resting on his shoulder, though most of her attention was focused on Jet who was happily talking to her about any and everything he could think about.
"And then I grabbed the mouse and wrapped my whole body around it!" Jet told her in a happy voice, quite glad that she was now able to understand him. "It tried to escape but I had it! And then I just squeezed and squeezed and squeezed..."
"Until it died?" Daphne guessed in an amused voice, keeping her voice low so nobody else could hear her.
"Exactly!" Jet all but shouted. "And then once it was dead I ate it! And that was the very first time I had ever in my life strangled my food to death!" He said in a proud voice.
"That's good for you, sweetie." Daphne whispered to him before she reached a hand over and began petting his head.
"Oh…oh...I like that!" Jet said, leaning into her touch. Harry looked at Tracey who was sat in the desk in front of them along with Blaise, she had been looking back and had witnessed the whole thing. She look at Harry with an amused expression, Harry gave her a small smile and a wink to show he was equally as amused. Tracey smiled back before turning away, blushing slightly.
SLAM!
Everybody in the room turned their heads up to the entrance of Professor Umbridge's office, where they saw that door had been slammed open and Madam Umbridge was stood, her eyes wide and looking quite unsettling. She softly gulped before straightening up and adopting a wide and unsettling smile.
"Good morning class." She said in a sickeningly sweet voice before she walked down the stairs, straightening her clothes as she did so, she stopped in front of her desk. "Now, we will be spending this year studying for your 'Ordinary Wizarding Level' examinations, most commonly known as 'O. '. We...Mr Potter!" She suddenly barked, losing her smile as she looked at Harry. "What is that?!" She demanded. Harry frowned and looked around before looking at Daphne who was sat next to him.
"I believe that she's a blonde, sir." Harry replied in a respectful voice.
"I was not referring to her and I am not a sir!" Madam Umbridge said, red faced. The students quietly laughed amongst themselves.
"Oh so sorry, that was a slip of my old snake tongue." Harry said in an innocent voice. "Please forgive me, sir...I mean Miss." Harry quickly corrected.
"Mr Potter, what is that on your desk?" Professor Umbridge asked, sounding far from amused.
"Oh, well this is a charms book, Professor." Harry said, holding up a book on charms before he let out a small sigh and put it away. "I sincerely apologize, Professor, you were just taking quite a long time so I figured I would entertain myself while I waited. Are you alright, Professor? You are quite late today, are you sick?"
"I am not sick," Professor Umbridge said through gritted teeth. "and that was not what I was referring to either, I am talking about that!" She said, pointing at Jet.
"Well...this is a snake." Harry said in a slow voice, as if explaining something to a child. He was about to speak again when Jet hissed at him. "A slithery snake." Harry added, earning a nod from Jet.
"Well, what is it doing in my classroom?" Professor Umbridge said, looking very annoyed.
"Being a slithery snake." Harry replied.
"Mr Potter!" Professor Umbridge snapped. "It shouldn't be in my classroom." Harry raised an eyebrow at her.
"This is my familiar, Professor." Harry responded, he really wasn't sure what was worse, the fact that this idiot thought she was a real professor or the fact that Harry had to at least pretend to respect her. Either way, she was not a proper professor as far as he was concerned.
"I do not care, get rid of it!" Madam Umbridge ordered, she was about to take away points from him but stopped when the snake looked up at her.
"I'll get rid of you, bitch!" Jet hissed.
"Madam Umbridge," Daphne spoke up, barely able to stop herself from smiling at Jet's comment. "with all due respect, you cannot do that. This snake is Lord Potter's familiar, as such he has a right to keep the snake with him at all times."
"Ha! Got told!" Jet laughed before turning to Daphne. "Nice one, Pet. You deserve a reward, I'll have Harry feed you later."
"Why are you both smiling?" Madam Umbridge frowned when Harry and Daphne suddenly started smiling.
"No reason." The two said at the same time.
"Hmm, you may keep your...'pet' in this class," Madam Umbridge sneered. "but I'll be watching you, both of you." She warned before turning to the rest of the class, a big smile suddenly appeared on her face as if a button had been pressed. "Now," She flicked her wand and several books from the front of the class flew forwards and stopped when each student had one book each. "study hard and you will be rewarded, fail to do so and the consequences shall be...severe." She finished with a little giggle, shaking her body slightly as if the very thought pleased her.
"Um...excuse me," Hermione Granger raised her hand several seconds later after skimming through the book. "there is nothing in here about using spells." She pointed out with a frown on her face.
"Using spells?" Madam Umbridge repeated with a loud laugh, as if that was the funniest joke she had ever heard. "I don't see why you would need to use spells."
"Excuse me," Harry raised his hand. "Madam Umbridge."
"Yes, Mr Potter?" She asked, her smile dimming slightly.
"You are aware that magic is performed through several different ways such as runes and rituals but that the most commonly taught way is through incantations and wand movements, AKA spells?" Harry asked, Umbridge opened her mouth to speak but Harry quickly continued before she could. "That's why we use spells here at what is actually a school for magic. We especially need to learn them because we will be required to use them in our exams." He added, sounding like he genuinely thought that she didn't know.
"It is the view of the ministry..." Madam Umbridge took a small breath to help her combat her desire to strangle Potter right here and now. "...that a theoretical knowledge will be sufficient in helping you pass your exams."
"We're not using magic?" Ron Weasley blurted out with disbelief.
"Students will raise their hands when they talk." She told him. "As I have said, a theoretical knowledge of the spells should be sufficient enough." Madam Umbridge said.
"But Madam Umbridge," Tracey raised her hand. "surely theoretical knowledge can't be enough, I mean...I could know how to theoretically build a world class broom, I wouldn't then instantly try it and hand it off to a world class quidditch player."
"Yes," Blaise agreed as he raised his hand. "I mean...I know a few people who know the theory to the patronus charm, including myself, but that doesn't mean we've been able to do it on the first try."
"You will not need to use the patronus charm, that's far beyond O.W.L level." Madam Umbridge replied.
"But that was not his point," Hermione spoke up. "we can't just go into our exams without actual practise, we'd fail for sure!"
"Yeah!" Ron nodded in agreement. "No way we'd get good grades if we just read." Ron said, saying the last word as if it had offended him.
"I find myself agreeing with 'Red McLoud Mouth' over there." Blaise said, gesturing to Ron. "Surely if it's just reading then we don't need to come to class, we could just do it in our common rooms or the library."
"Professor," Harry asked, raising his hand once again. "don't you as a teacher think there should be more practical learning? After all, you're here to make sure we don't make mistakes, and if it's just reading then your presence is not really required, because then even a squib would be able to teach this lesson, right?" Harry asked in a questioning voice, the slight tilt of his head might have been a bit much but he was fairly sure that he had sounded as genuine as he possibly could.
"Enough!" Umbridge said loudly when she saw other students were about to speak. "No more questions! I will not repeat myself! Now, read your books. There will be no need to talk." She said before she turned around and went back to her desk, she took a deep breath before she sat down only to realise that she had left the paper work she needed to do upstairs. She barely refrained from scowling before she stood up and went into her office. She returned a couple of minutes later only to find the students looking down at the books, not making any noise. She let out a pleased smile, glad that the little brats were doing as they were told, she took a moment before returning to her desk.
Once she had sat down and placed her paperwork on the desk, she dipped her quill in her ink and began writing. She glanced up and saw the Potter brat was reading his book, looking like an innocent little student. But Umbridge knew better, she knew that the boy was a trouble making son of a mudblood who delighted in causing trouble for good and hardworking witches and wizards like Minister Fudge. It enraged her to no end how the filthy halfblood had managed to worm himself into the company of the children of such fine and upstanding people. The boy had likely used that snake of his - which he was undoubtedly controlling through some dark magic - to threaten the others and gain their respect so he could start corrupting them.
What was worse was that she knew he was in a relationship with Daphne Greengrass, the heiress of the Greengrass family. She found it difficult to believe that a girl from such a nice family would willingly be with a delinquent like Potter, had Potter threatened the girl? Used a love potion on her? Or worse the imperius curse? Whatever it was, she would find out. Potter, if he had to be with a girl, should settle with a mudblood, that would be around his level. Or better yet, he could just not procreate at all.
Umbridge knew that it was possible that Miss Greengrass was simply using Potter for his power and money, she rather hoped for the girls sake that she was. Umbridge, no matter how much she wanted to deny it, knew that Potter was a rich and powerful wizard, one who was backed by other influential and powerful witches and wizards. But she would not let that intimidate her, she WILL prove him to be the evil little child she knew him to be.
Umbridge frowned, knowing she should have been trying to rile up Potter so she could punish him, but truthfully she was still trying to mentally catch up, she was mentally thrown off since having most definitely been unprepared for this class since she hadn't had breakfast, nor had she managed to change into new clothes, sure all of her clothes were pretty much the same but still. Anyway...she didn't think it mattered too much, she still had a whole year to punish the boy.
"The ugly one is looking at us again." Jet quietly hissed to Harry and Daphne after Umbridge glanced at them again before looking down at her paperwork. "You should pray and hope that she is not attracted to females." He told Daphne before turning to Harry. "You should pray and hope that she is not attracted to males." Jet added before slithering up through Harry's sleeve and up his arm until he was resting on Harry's shoulders. "And now I shall prey and most desperately hope that she is not attracted to snakes." Jet added, hiding his head behind Harry's neck. Harry and Daphne exchanged looks, not entirely sure if they should be amused or not. "I REALLY hope she is not attracted to snakes."
A.N: Hi guys, hope you liked the chapter. First of all I just want to address the couple of people who have been complaining about Harry obliviating Umbridge, well...because no matter how much he wants to make her suffer, he is not going to want to go to Azkaban prison which he would if she remembered. See? I'll explain:
Punishing Umbridge - Harry likes!
Punishing Harry - Harry don't like.
So yes, she might not remember it but he still gets to make himself happy by punishing her like this until he can finally get around to either killing her or doing something that would be okay for her to remember.
Also I'm not going to put many omakes in this story but I have one that I have not been able to get out of my head. Hope you like it, feel free to leave a review.
Omake :
"You will not punish my students with a blood quill!" Professor McGonagall said, ignoring the crowd of students that had gathered.
"Oh, and what will you do if I continue to do so?" Umbrige said with a small laugh. Professor McGonagall's eyes narrowed.
...
...
...
...
"Well," Daphne said as she and the other Slytherin's exited the hospital wing after visiting Professor McGonagall who had unfortunatly hurt her back and ignoring Umbridge who had hurt everything from the neck up. "I think even in the last moments of my life I would never have been able to predict that happening."
"Same." Tracey agreed. "Who knew the old girl had it in her?"
"Indeed." Blaise agreed. "Never expected such a thing from a Gryffindor."
"Yeah, but I've got to say..." Harry spoke up. "...that was undoubtedly the best RKO I have ever seen."