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Chapter 12: Forbidden Whispers
Afternoon sunlight streamed through the tall windows, spilling into a stylish downtown café.
The air was rich with the aroma of freshly ground coffee and sugary desserts.
Soft jazz flowed, creating a lazy, respectable ambiance.
Yet the conversation about to unfold between two women in the window booth clashed with the elegance suffocatingly taboo.
Wang Li wore a well-tailored off-white dress, her complexion rosy and radiant.
Lounging against the soft sofa back, she stirred her cappuccino with a small silver spoon, a faint, satisfied smile on her lips.
Her eyes were bright, even a bit girlishly sly nothing like the woman months ago who'd been shrouded in fear and shame.
Across from her, Chen Fang seemed constrained and dim.
In a conservative dark knit, her hands were folded on her lap, fingertips faintly pale.
She kept her gaze lowered to the untouched black coffee before her, as if something unbearable hid in the dark liquid.
Her face was pale, shadows under her eyes; even light makeup could not mask the bone-deep fatigue and… numbness.
"Sister Fang, long time no see. Look at you still so… clenched?" Wang Li broke the silence, voice mildly chiding but more loftily "open-minded."
Leaning forward, she lowered her voice but stared boldly at Chen Fang. "It's already like this what is there to hide? Look at me how great I am now."
Chen Fang's body trembled almost imperceptibly.
She raised her head to meet Wang Li's too-bright, almost bragging eyes; her throat went dry.
"…Like what?" she asked, dryly playing dumb.
"Tsk!" Wang Li clicked her tongue at the pretense. "What else? With our sons, of course!" The words were so plain, tossed off like talking weather as if not the kind of incest that ruins lives.
After glancing around to make sure no one was listening, she went on excited, like sharing a secret: "Sister Fang, once you think it through, the skies open! Those rules and 'morals' self-made shackles that choke you."
Chen Fang paled further and wrapped cold fingers around her cup.
"Shackles…?" she murmured hollowly.
To her, they weren't shackles only a crumbling dam; if she let go completely, the surge of guilt would drown her.
"Exactly!" Wang Li nodded firmly, as if finally finding someone who got it. "We're abroad now so open! Westerners so free! Age gaps, relations if both agree and are happy, who cares?" She sipped elegantly and spoke the shocking. "At our age, we're in our prime our sons are young and strong, known quantities, so reassuring. Better than random men, right? Why let the fat water flow to outsiders?"
"Both agree…?" Chen Fang's voice trembled.
Between her and Xiaoyu when had there ever been "agree"? Only coercion, humiliation, and numb submission.
Looking at Wang Li's rightful, even savoring expression made her feel estranged and absurd.
"Of course!" Wang Li either missed it or chose not to see it immersed in her self-made "openness."
"Xiaokai is tender now lots of tricks, better than boys. You have no idea…" She leaned in, voice low with bedroom-gossip giddiness. "He's into roleplay lately had me be a nurse last night… tsk, the kid went wild. Nearly broke my back but damn, it was good!" A flush warmed her cheeks; her eyes went misty in afterglow.
Chen Fang couldn't imagine or understand how Wang Li could speak so openly, even boastfully, about sex details with her biological son. The image made her sick and deeply afraid.
She managed a stiff, forced smile.
"Sister Fang, you should loosen up!" Wang Li, seeing Chen Fang still taut, "counseled" earnestly. "Don't wear the doom-and-gloom mask. You're in your early forties why look like a granny? Women need moisture! Xiaoyu is young and strong enjoy it! What's to agonize over? Or… can he not? Can't satisfy you?" She winked with a teasing, old-hand air.
"N-no…" Chen Fang denied, flustered and barely audible.
Xiaoyu's "ability" wasn't in question it was devastating. But "enjoy"? The word pricked her heart. She had only grown used to it numb performing "duties" like the walking dead.
"There you go!" Wang Li clapped, solution in hand. "If he satisfies you, take it boldly! Shyness is boring. Men like initiative open women. The more you open, the more he goes; the more you enjoy win-win." She dispensed her "wisdom" like a seasoned flirt.
Chen Fang stayed silent, stirring a coffee gone cold.
Wang Li's "guidance" cut her numbed heart with dull knives. Enjoy? Be open? She couldn't. Every contact with Xiaoyu tore her soul. She was trapped like a moth in a web.
"However…" Wang Li leaned back, cup in hand, gaze drifting to the window carrying a faint, maybe unconscious wistfulness. "No matter how delicious, every day gets old."
Chen Fang snapped her head up.
Wang Li went on, as if complaining or stating a truth: "Xiaokai's too energetic clings to me daily. Sure, it's great but… you know… something's missing? Like… like playing the same game no matter how fun, a bit… mm… stale?" She sought the word, brow faintly furrowed.
"Freshness…?" Chen Fang's heart skipped. A vague, terrifying thought flickered.
"Exactly!" Wang Li found it and brightened. "Even the prettiest woman every day, every time it's not like the first, right? Men chase novelty by nature. Our two boys peak curiosity greedy for new." She drew out the words, with a suggestive glint at Chen Fang.
Chen Fang's heart sank. She understood the unspoken. A chill rose from her feet. She dared not think it through.
"So," Wang Li concluded open smile back on "as 'moms,' we should keep up and understand their needs! Sometimes, change the flavor find new fun good for everyone, right?" She raised her cup to Chen Fang eyes loaded.
Chen Fang didn't answer. The café's warmth went thin and cold.
Wang Li's "guidance" and "complaints" were stones dropped in dead water sending cold, dangerous ripples through Chen Fang's numb heart-lake.
She could almost see the Pandora's box of "swapping" pried open a crack by Wang Li's offhand words.
Meanwhile, in the tucked corner behind their booth
Two tall boys in baseball caps brims low each with an iced cola, phones in hand ears pricked to catch every word.
A cold curve touched Xiaoyu's lips.
Auntie Wang Li's wanton lines especially "even the prettiest, every day gets old" stabbed a hidden place in him.
Unbidden, he pictured Auntie Wang Li lush, mature, full of wiles imagined her beneath him would she scream wantonly as under her son?
That different flavor from his mother wild, proactive drew him like poison.
He glanced at his hand under the table knuckles whitening and felt his crotch tighten.
Xiaokai licked dry lips eyes bright with anticipation and fierce curiosity.
Auntie Chen Fang the woman always lowered, quiet, threaded with melancholy.
Unlike his mother's hot openness like a quiet, even withered flower.
That stark contrast was deadly alluring.
He imagined pressing that quiet flower beneath him, ripping her conservative shell what expressions would bloom? Would she cry out as Mom or weep silently? The conquest of a different kind sent heat through his gut.
He stole a look at Xiaoyu; their eyes crossed each seeing in the other a naked desire for the other's mother and a tacit pact.
"Same woman… you do get sick of it," Xiaoyu said low enough for two flat, like a fact.
Xiaokai bared a wolfish, invasive grin and nodded.
He lifted his cola and gulped; the ice couldn't douse the evil fire roaring at the thought of "changing flavors."
Coffee's aroma still floated; the jazz still ran smooth.
But in the seemingly placid café afternoon, a crazier, more fallen thought twined between the two boys and two mothers like vines coiling their already sinking souls.
Wang Li's careless words were the spark for the next, more terrifying storm.
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