"...Can't you read?"
Xu Gui fiddled with the thing in her hand, pointing to the two large characters written on it:
"Isn't it written here, 'Fortune Telling'?"
The cameraman said, "I mean, what are you doing with this? The job you mentioned, it wouldn't be..."
He pointed to the two characters "Fortune Telling" on the banner, his expression strange, "You wouldn't be using this to tell fortunes, would you?"
"Yes!" Xu Gui said matter-of-factly, "Didn't your program team say that you don't care about any job... then fortune telling is a job, right?"
The cameraman was speechless.
Xu Gui said, "I've thought about it, and I'm lazy and greedy. I can't do anything well. There's really no job suitable for me..." This tortoise only has one advantage: she is extremely self-aware and content with what she has.
"If I had to say what I'm good at, it would be telling fortunes for you humans."
After all, for them, the Xuan Turtle, fortune telling is practically an instinct, just like humans eating when they're hungry or drinking when they're thirsty—it's an extremely simple thing.
So, no matter how you look at it, setting up a fortune-telling stall is the best job choice.
"Look, I even had someone make me a fortune-telling banner!" she said proudly, pointing to the banner in her hand. "When I put this out, everyone will know I'm a fortune teller."
The photographer hesitated, then finally said, "...Whatever makes you happy."
Xu Gui was naturally overjoyed. She felt like a genius and immediately dragged her folding table and stool, excitedly heading towards the nearest overpass.
Overpasses have always been a battleground for fortune tellers; if you want to find one, you just need to visit several overpasses, and you're bound to find one or two.
The overpass Xu Gui chose happened to have an old fortune teller. He was thin, wore a long robe, and had a beard. His venerable appearance was quite intimidating, perfectly matching the Chinese image of a diviner.
Compared to Xu Gui's meager equipment, the old man was clearly "well-prepared." Although he also had a table and a chair, his table was made of solid wood, and the chair had a backrest and a cushion underneath—it looked very soft. Even the fortune-telling banner next to him was larger than Xu Gui's.
Xu Gui glanced silently at her own folding table and chair, and couldn't help but comfort herself, "As the old saying goes, bad students have lots of stationery. A true expert like me doesn't need these kinds of tools."
Thinking this, she regained her confidence, straightened her back, and walked past the old man with her head held high.
The old man, who inexplicably felt as if he had been belittled, thought, "...Nonsense."
When he saw what Xu Gui had set out, the old man's eyebrows twitched even more, and his expression became strange and peculiar.
Xu
Gui didn't have much stuff. After setting up the table and chairs, she placed her fortune-telling banner next to the table—the banner had a base underneath, so it would stand steadily on the ground.
Once it was set up, Xu Gui clapped her hands, thinking: Everything is ready, just waiting for the right moment.
Now her fortune-telling stall was up and running; all she had to do was wait for customers to come. Although, perhaps, maybe, she wasn't really keen on "working," as a Xuan Turtle, she was a natural fortune teller. Humans would surely flock to her stall, eager to have their fortunes told.
If humans really wanted her to tell their fortunes, she wouldn't object; after all, turtles are just that excellent.
...If Xu Gui were still in her Xuan Turtle form, her little turtle tail would definitely be sticking up high.
"Fortune telling?" She was imagining countless humans chasing after her, wanting her to tell their fortunes, when a voice suddenly came from above. She looked up and saw her "colleague" standing in front of her stall.
Xu Gui: "...Is there something you need?"
The old man was examining her fortune-telling banner. Hearing her voice, he looked down at her and asked, "You're a fortune teller?"
Xu Gui nodded.
The old man pursed his lips, his eyes scanning Xu Gui up and down. He said, "You're so young, why are you here swindling people? Do your parents know what you're doing out there?"
Xu Gui looked up at him and honestly said, "...I'm an orphan, I have no parents." Whether it was her or the original "Xu Gui," both she and the tortoise were orphans.
The old man: "..."
Meanwhile, the live stream was filled with laughter:
[Who knows? It's supposed to be a sad conversation, but I couldn't help but laugh out loud. Their dialogue is so funny!]
[Sure enough, the old saying is true: sincerity is the ultimate weapon. This old man was clearly looking for trouble, but Xu Gui's words left him speechless.]
[I bet the old man will get out of bed in the middle of the night and slap himself, cursing himself: "I deserve to die!"]
[Here's a joke: a fortune teller at a street stall accuses another fortune teller of swindling and cheating. Is that what they call self-insult?]
...
Xu Gui's live stream has become increasingly lively over the past two days. She's gained quite a few new fans. Tang Xu and Qiu Nai's fans are willing to criticize her, but the more they criticize her lately, the more the viewers resent it—the more you criticize, the more I want to watch.
Now, the fans of both sides dared not say anything more, fearing that their aggressive actions would only make netizens feel sorry for Xu Gui and gain her more fans.
"...Everyone, don't go to Xu Gui's live stream to curse her recently. She's a clown, a nobody. If we curse her, we'll only increase her popularity and let her ride on our coattails!"
"We won't curse her, let's see where she goes to ride on our coattails!"
The fans of both sides agreed on this, which resulted in a surprisingly good atmosphere in Xu Gui's live stream these past two days. Although the popularity wasn't as high as the most popular ones, anyone who observed carefully would have noticed that the popularity of her live stream was increasing significantly every day.
Moreover, most of the viewers who watched her live stream for a while on one day would still appear in her live stream the next day.
This was something that only the staff who kept a close eye on the live streams of the various guests might have noticed.
Looking at the data from Xu Gui's live stream these past two days, the director pondered, "Perhaps, inviting Xu Gui to participate in the program would be the best decision?"
*
Xu Gui was still staring at the old man.
Seeing the old man suddenly fall silent, Xu Gui waited for a long time before finally unable to hold back and asking, "What's wrong with you? Why are you standing there in front of my stall?"
The old man: "..."
"I just wanted to say," the old man finally managed to squeeze out a sentence after a long pause, "that lying isn't a good thing. You're so young, you could find other work."
Xu Gui: "I just think fortune telling is the best job."
The old man: Tsk.
So you're completely stubborn, aren't you?
"And who said I'm a fraud!" Xu Gui retorted, looking at the old man with a hint of pride. "I'm different from you. You're a fraud, but I really can tell fortunes!"
The old man was immediately amused. He said, "You say you can tell fortunes? Okay, then you tell my fortune first, let me see if you're a fraud or a divine fortune teller."
"Wow, Old Lu is arguing with someone over there, I'll go see."
"Is this young girl setting up a fortune-telling stall like Old Lu? No wonder Old Lu is arguing with her, after all, competitors are rivals."
"Is that a camera over there? Is this young girl an internet celebrity?"
The stall owners selling other things under the overpass all gathered around, their faces full of excitement. Some of Old Lu's friends came over and chatted with him, but Old Lu impatiently pulled their hands off his shoulders.
"You say you can tell fortunes, then tell me my fortune, my love life!" The old man chuckled. "What, can't you figure it out?"
Xu Gui: "Wait a minute..."
She stared at the old man's face for a few seconds, then calmly looked away and said, "I didn't realize before, old man, that you're actually a billionaire."
The old man: "..."
The others: "..."
A few seconds later, a burst of laughter erupted from the crowd.
"Hahaha! You're really good at talking nonsense." The middle-aged man selling toys was overjoyed. He tugged at the old man's clothes and said, "Look at him, how does he look like a billionaire? Besides, have you ever seen a billionaire appear in this place?"
The others laughed too: "That's right, which billionaire is as down on his luck as him? You girl, you can't even brag properly!"
Everyone was laughing, but the old man couldn't laugh when he looked at Xu Gui. No one knew better than him, the person involved, whether what Xu Gui said was true or not.
But he didn't understand how Xu Gui knew. Surely she couldn't have just calculated it?
The old man didn't believe it; he preferred to believe Xu Gui was a junior member of someone he knew. Just as he was thinking this, he heard Xu Gui look at him curiously and say,
"...You also maintain ambiguous relationships with three aunties. One you met while square dancing, one is divorced with two children, and the other... um!"
Xu Gui couldn't finish her sentence about who the other one was because the old man rushed over and covered his mouth.
"Ha, haha," the old man chuckled dryly. "Your daughter, how can you joke like that? Ha, haha, hahaha—"
Xu Gui looked at him with a deep gaze.
The old man: "..."
*
[Why does this old man's act of covering his mouth at the end seem so guilty? Could it be that Xu Gui really guessed right, that he has ambiguous relationships with three aunties?]
[I think so too... Waaah, look at him, an eighty-year-old man with three women, while I'm a twenty-year-old bachelor, no woman interested. How pathetic!]
[Is this your main point?] The key point is, if this is true, then what she said before, that the old man is a billionaire, could also be true?
Upon seeing this message, the viewers in the live stream exclaimed: "!!!!" Watson, you've found a blind spot.
Could they have witnessed something incredible?
*
On the other side, the old man, covering Xu Gui's mouth, accidentally glanced at the cameraman carrying a video camera and casually asked,
"What's that camera the person next to you is carrying doing?"
Xu Gui wiped her mouth and calmly replied, "Oh, I'm recording a program, filming a live stream. This is my cameraman."
The old man: "..."
The old man: ? ? !!
The old man's expression cracked.
The sky had fallen!