Location: Kuoh Town - Shopping District
Time: A Peaceful Sunday Afternoon (Supposedly)
The world was safe. Trihexa was gone. Rizevim was dust.
Raiden was currently facing his greatest challenge yet: The Limited Edition 50-Layer Crepe Challenge.
"If you finish it in 5 minutes, it's free!" the shopkeeper announced nervously, sweating as he looked at the giant mountain of cream and fruit.
"Done," Raiden said.
Gulp.
The entire crepe vanished. Not eaten bite by bite, but inhaled via a mini-vacuum vortex in his mouth.
"Time: 3 seconds!" Rossweisse cheered, holding a stopwatch. "That saves us 2000 Yen! Good job, Raiden-sama!"
Ravel Phenex sighed, adjusting her glasses. "Raiden-sama, please don't use spatial magic to cheat at eating contests. It's undignified for a 'God of Destruction'."
Suddenly, the ground shook.
It wasn't an earthquake. It wasn't a Devil attack.
It was a... bouncy explosion.
BOING-BOOM!
A mushroom cloud made of pink glitter and clover-shaped smoke rose from the central park.
Raiden wiped whipped cream from his mouth.
"That explosion smells like... gunpowder and strawberries?"
Raiden, followed by his entourage, walked to the park.
The playground was decimated. The slide had been modified with rocket boosters. The sandbox was now a crater.
Standing in the center of the chaos was a woman.
She wore a white and red witch's dress, a floppy hat, and pointed ears. She looked like an adult, more mature version of a certain "Spark Knight," but her aura was far more chaotic.
She was holding a fuzzy, round bomb with a cute face.
"Hmm," the woman tapped her chin. "Maybe I used too much Pyro slime concentrate? The blast radius was only three blocks. I was aiming for five."
Raiden walked up behind her.
"Hey. You broke the swing set."
The woman turned around. She had bright red eyes and a smile that spelled trouble.
"Oh! Hello!" She waved cheerfully. "I'm just calibrating the local ley lines to be more... fun!"
She looked Raiden up and down. Her eyes sparkled.
"Wait! I know you! You're the Eater! The one who deleted the ugly beast! 666, was it?"
Raiden narrowed his eyes. This woman... she didn't feel like a Devil, Angel, or Youkai. She felt like a glitch in the universe.
"Who are you?"
The woman curtsied, pulling a massive travel guide out of nowhere.
"I am Alice! An Elder of the Hexenzirkel, author of the Teyvat Travel Guide, and mother of the cutest bomber in the world! I'm just passing through this dimension to pick up some souvenirs."
Alice. Klee's Mother. The Omnipotent Witch.
"Dimension hopper," Raiden nodded. "That explains why you smell like stardust."
"And you smell like a buffet!" Alice stepped into his personal space, poking his chest. "Dragon, Devil, Human, Void... wow! You're a walking melting pot! My daughter would love to blow you up to see what's inside!"
"She can try," Raiden smirked. "But I bite."
Alice laughed. "I like you! You're blunt. Most people in this world are so dramatic with their 'sacred gears' and 'factions'. Boring!"
She reached into her bag (which seemed to have infinite space) and pulled out a steaming, glowing red bento box.
"Here! A souvenir from my world! It's 'Alice's Special Fisherman's Toast: Nuclear Edition'!"
Ravel panicked. "Raiden-sama! Do not eat that! My scanners are detecting unstable mana, high-grade explosives, and... chili peppers?"
"Explosives?" Raiden took the box.
He sniffed it. It scorched his nose hairs.
"Finally," Raiden grinned. "Something spicy."
He shoveled the entire toast into his mouth.
CRUNCH. BOOM.
A small explosion literally went off inside his mouth. Smoke poured out of his ears. His stomach glowed red for a second as the internal blast was contained by his Gluttony.
Raiden swallowed.
He exhaled a puff of fire shaped like a clover.
"8/10," Raiden critiqued. "Good texture. A bit too much gunpowder, not enough cheese."
Alice clapped her hands, delighted. "You ate it?! And you didn't explode?! Marvelous! Usually, that turns hillichurls into fireworks!"
Serafall Leviathan arrived on the scene, twirling her wand.
"Stop right there, villain! destroying the park is a crime against cu—"
Serafall froze. She looked at Alice's witch outfit. She looked at the cute bombs.
"OMIGOSH! IS THAT A CUSTOM WITCH OUTFIT?! IT'S SO CUTE!"
Alice looked at Serafall's "Magical Girl Miracle Levia-chan" costume.
"Oh? A fellow practitioner of the 'Dress-Up Arts'? I love the frills!"
"Right?!" Serafall grabbed Alice's hands. "I'm Serafall! The Magical Girl Satan! Can you teach me how to make pink explosions?!"
"Of course!" Alice winked. "I call it the 'Dodoco-Style Landscaping Technique'. It's great for removing mountains!"
Sona Sitri (arriving late): "Please do not teach the Satan how to remove mountains..."
Alice turned back to Raiden.
"So, Mr. Gluttony King. I heard there's a tournament coming up? The Azazel Cup?"
"Yeah."
"I can't join. I have to get back to my daughter before she levels Mondstadt," Alice shrugged. "But... I can give you a parting gift."
She snapped her fingers.
A small, red, floating robot appeared. It looked like a mix of a familiar and a bomb.
"This is Dodoco Mark II. It's a support unit. It will analyze your enemies and, if they get too annoying..." Alice made an explosion gesture with her hands. "...Kaboom!"
She tossed the device to Ravel.
"Keep him fed, Four-Eyes! He runs on solar power and chaos!"
Alice checked a pocket watch that seemed to run backward.
"Oops! Time to go! The barriers between worlds are getting thin."
She floated up into the air, opening a portal that showed a glimpse of a green, grassy world with wind-swept plains.
"Raiden!" Alice called out.
"What?"
"Don't settle for just this world," Alice grinned, tipping her hat. "The Void is big. There are tastier things out there than Devils and Dragons. One day... come visit Teyvat. I'll cook you a feast that will blow your mind. Literally."
"I'll hold you to that," Raiden crossed his arms.
"Bye-bye!"
POOF.
Alice vanished in a shower of clover petals. The park was destroyed, the swings were rocket-powered, and the local stray cats were now wearing tiny hats.
Raiden looked around.
"She was chaotic."
"She was a menace!" Ravel shrieked, holding the ticking Dodoco robot. "How do I turn this thing off?!"
"You don't," Raiden laughed, walking away. "Chaos adds flavor."
Location: Gremory Mansion Strategy Room
Event: Azazel Cup Team Registration
Later that evening, the group gathered to finalize their team for the tournament.
"Team Name?" Rias asked, holding the form.
"Team Gluttony," Raiden said immediately.
"Denied," Ravel said. "Too simple."
"Team 'We Ate God'," Issei suggested.
"Too blasphemous," Asia whispered.
Rossweisse raised her hand. "Team Budget Cuts?"
"No," everyone said.
Raiden leaned back in his chair, looking at the new Dodoco Mark II floating around Ravel's head. He thought about Alice's words. Don't settle for just this world.
"Team Void," Raiden decided. "Because by the time we're done, there will be nothing left on the board."
Rias smiled, writing it down.
"Team Void. Captain: Raiden. Members: Rias Gremory, Issei Hyoudou, Akeno Himejima, Kiba Yuuto, Koneko Toujou, Xenovia Quarta, Rossweisse, Gasper Vladi."
"And," Raiden pointed at the entry form. "Put Alice down as 'Sponsor'."
"She isn't even from this dimension!"
"Exactly," Raiden grinned. "Let the judges figure that out."