Lykos was a strange man.
From what I had heard, he was a dismissed soldier turned mercenary. They said he was quite famous back in the day, too. Now, he is a gang leader, though he only drinks alcohol and sleeps every day.
Even then, his skills were undeniable, and he is one of the only people who could help me understand this "Aura". So here I was at the bar again, with Damon taking me out to the backyard.
The backyard was like a landfill with all kinds of stuff, but mostly broken alcohol bottles. I walked around a bit and waited. And waited.
...Lykos didn't forget our meeting, did he?
I stretched out my hand, trying to recall that feeling again and again. But no matter what I did, only faint hues appeared. I thought a lot about it, but I could not be certain what the problem was. What am I missing?
That desperate need for strength... That clinging grip on life... Do I need to put myself in danger again? Is my physical strength simply lacking? Or...
I closed my eyes again and put my sword aside. Sitting down, I tried to regulate my breathing as if I were meditating. I focused on that tingling sensation only, ignoring everything else.
It was no longer a vague tingling. I could almost feel something moving beneath my skin, as if I could feel my blood flowing through my entire body at once. The sensation grew more and more vivid as my heartbeat grew louder and louder.
I could feel it. A force flowing inside my body. Is this...
"Wow. Look at that. You're doing it, kid. Keep going."
The sensation quickly faded away as I opened my eyes. Lykos was finally here, holding a bottle. His face remained completely unamused. He walked toward me, his steps unexpectedly steady.
"You figured it out yourself."
"I was?"
"Yeah."
I quickly stood up.
"So, does that mean I am stronger now?"
"Not at all."
"Huh?"
Lykos casually took another sip from his bottle.
"Aura is a tool. You need to learn how to use it."
"...So how do I use it?"
Lykos paused for a moment, as if recalling something.
"How do I put it... Did you have breakfast yet?"
I was puzzled. How is that relevant?
"Yes?"
"That's good... Can you try to harden your Aura?"
"Harden?"
"Yeah. Manifest it, then harden it. Simple, right?"
"..."
I have no idea what he meant by that.
"...Can you show me how to do it? Maybe I could understand something then."
"Simple enough."
Lykos held his now-empty bottle forward. Then I saw it: that same blackish Aura enveloping the bottle from every side. It was no longer faint or hazy. A distinct layer covered the glass, following every curve of its shape.
I tapped the bottle, then touched it. It did not feel like glass at all. It felt as though the glass had been coated in metal.
"What is this...?"
I blurted it out loud.
"Look."
He looked back, then suddenly hurled the bottle.
Clang!
The bottle smacked against the wall. Instead of shattering, it bounced back and rolled across the ground. Not even a scratch could be seen on it. As its Aura faded away, Lykos effortlessly stomped it into pieces.
"That's what we call Solid Aura. Think of your Aura like water. It could be frozen solid, or boiled into steam."
"Oh..."
"Your Aura currently is nothing. Completely formless. Start by hardening it first."
After saying that, Lykos walked away, leaving me alone to figure things out. Seriously? What did I even expect, really?
I tried drawing out my Aura again to no avail. It seemed that I had to continue meditating for it to manifest at this stage. Until I could freely draw it out, hardening it was still out of reach.
I meditated all morning, grasping at that sensation time after time. Every time I opened my eyes, that sensation faded away, though each time it lingered a bit longer than the last.
As I opened my eyes again...
"Ah."
I waited a few minutes. The sensation stayed. I could see it now. Hues of red over my body. Flickering, as if the faintest of wind would blow them away.
I stretched out my arm. However, no matter what I tried, they never hardened, only fading out like sparks. I sat down, manifested them, and tried it again. Over and over, until I gave up in futility.
Doing this for so long soaked me in sweat completely. I never knew meditation was this tiring.
I glanced over my sword.
"Maybe..."
I grabbed it and stood up. I assumed the only basic stance I knew and started swinging. Normally, on this day of the week, I would have already trained in the morning. But I didn't, so here I was.
Every swing, I wondered why I was doing this again. Sparks of Aura scattered from my body whenever I tried to draw them toward the blade.
I had seen it before. The undead's blade. Theron's. Even Lykos'. Their weapons had carried that strange force, yet mine refused to do the same.
I don't get it. Why must everything go wrong? Is it my fault that I wasn't strong enough? Running like this is exhausting. When will it end? How can I know that I am enough?
Those demonbeasts... Creatures made from miasma... People who kill...
All of this unfairness just made me...
Shhk!
The sharp crack snapped me out of my thoughts. I could hear footsteps approaching.
"You're a fast learner. Didn't expect that."
Lykos showed up again. I didn't expect that.
Lykos uncorked another bottle.
"You could infuse Aura somewhat. I'll give you that."
"I still don't understand how I am supposed to harden my Aura."
"Didn't you just do it?"
"What?"
He pointed to my sword, which was devoid of Aura.
"Your slash just now was infused with Solid Aura. Rough, but unmistakably hardened."
"..."
"Unconsciously, huh? I don't know how you did it, but try to remember how."
"Was that unusual?"
"Not really. Everyone's Aura is different. Maybe your Aura reacts better to something."
Something, huh?
I thought back to that moment.
I hadn't been trying to harden my Aura. I hadn't even been thinking about Aura.
I had only wanted to cut.
Anything in front of me.
A demonbeast. A person. It didn't matter. I wanted to cut it down.
...Killing intent.
How ironic.
The sun set, and so I walked back to the church. On the way, I saw that place again. Broken streetlamps and withered trees. And under one tree, that dead magpie was still there.
...I couldn't avoid this forever, could I? I need to talk to Angela again. I'll do so tomorrow, surely.