Idate grinned instantly. "A game? Sure. And if I win…" He pointed at Naruto's masked face. "I get to ask what's under your mask. And why your eye's covered with a bandage."
Naruto rested both hands on the counter, voice calm. "Then let's open the game."
He lifted one finger. "I have a head like a cat and feet like a cat, but I am not a cat. What am I?"
Idate leaned back, thinking hard for all of three seconds. "Easy. A dog. Like the Inuzuka clan dogs."
Naruto shook his head once. "Bob bob. Wrong."
Idate blinked, lips curling. "What kind of—Bob bob?—what even is that? I give up, man. You're smart, Bill."
Naruto tapped the counter lightly. "A kitten."
Idate stared blankly. "What?"
Naruto repeated the riddle with the same calm tone. "I have a head like a cat and feet like a cat, but I am not a cat. What am I? If you answered 'a smaller cat' or 'a lynx,' I would've given you a pass."
Idate smacked the table and laughed. "Damn, I like this kid—wowwww! You're a menace, Bill!"
He turned toward Teuchi, full of reckless enthusiasm. "Old man! I'm buying a bunch today! Ten portions—for my squad, the academy brats, and my brother!"
Teuchi brightened instantly, hands already moving to prepare. "Of course! Anything that keeps you—and everyone else—happy."
Minutes passed. The kitchen filled with steam and the soft clatter of bowls. Idate devoured his ramen with the enthusiasm of someone who believed life's complicated problems could be solved with broth and noodles. He slurped loudly, wiped his mouth with his sleeve, and reached for the next bowl.
Then his eyes drifted sideways.
Naruto—still wearing the mask, still in his "Bill the dishwasher" getup—sat beside the sink, idly twirling a flame in his palm. A clean, sapphire-blue fire that danced without heat, shaped into spirals and quiet flickers like living glass.
Idate froze mid-chew. "Whoa… what the hell is THAT? Some kind of new kekkei genkai? Looks cool as hell!"
Naruto rolled the flame between his fingers like a coin trick. "No. Just one of the tricks I used at my last job."
Idate swallowed quickly. "Job?"
Naruto paused for half a second.
Idate's eyes suddenly lit up. "OHHH! You're a circus traveler! That explains the fancy movements—the mask—the weird riddles—yeah, now it makes sense!"
He leaned forward, fascinated. "Can I touch it? Just to see if it's real?"
Naruto tilted his head slightly, the flame spinning once above his palm. "You sure? They say a handshake counts as signing a deal, you know."
Idate snorted. "Nahhh, if it burns me, I'll just run to a nearby med-nin. No big deal."
Naruto's smile widened behind the mask. "Then we have a deal."
He extended his hand. Idate grabbed it confidently.
The blue flame wrapped around their palms—not burning, not hurting—just pulsing once like a heartbeat before dissolving into the air. Idate laughed, shaking his hand. "It's real! Damn, Bill, that's insane!"
Naruto lowered his gaze for a moment, feeling the new pulse inside his body—Idate's speed, his natural stride, his baseline acceleration. A small boost. Not much, but useful.
Another piece. Another step toward rebuilding what I lost.
The blue flame wrapped around their palms pulsing once like a heartbeat before Naruto dissolved the flame into the air. Idate laughed, shaking his hand. "It's real! Damn, Bill, that's insane!"
Naruto lowered his gaze for a moment, feeling the faint new rhythm inside his body—Idate's stride, his acceleration, his natural sprinting instinct. A small boost. Not dramatic. But useful.
Another piece. Another step toward rebuilding what I lost.
Idate finished packing his takeaway portions, tying the bundles with sloppy enthusiasm. "Well, see you around! If I make chunin soon, I'll recommend you to become a genin. You'd fit right in, Bill!"
Naruto gave a short nod, slipping back behind the counter with the ease of someone who didn't care about playing along. "Please come again to this humble ramen restaurant."
Idate waved over his shoulder. "Definitely! Food's great, staff's weird—perfect combo!"
He vanished through the curtain.
Teuchi exhaled, finally letting the tension leave his shoulders. "I didn't know you were capable of doing that, Naruto."
Naruto removed his mask just enough to breathe comfortably, eye narrowed. "No one knows anything about what happens in the next minute. Or the next day. That's just how life works, old man."
Naruto removed his mask just enough to breathe, his eye narrowing with that tired, ancient sharpness. "No one knows anything about what happens in the next minute. Or the next day. That's just how life works, old man."
He slipped the mask back on, adjusted his cloak, grabbed his cane, and with a smooth motion restored his full Bill Cipher attire—top hat, eyepatch, cloak swaying like a small lord preparing to exit the stage.
He turned toward the door.
Before he could leave, a soft voice called from the kitchen.
"Wait—Naruto."
Ayame stepped out, wiping her hands on her apron. She had clearly been watching everything from the moment the genin arrived. Her expression carried both warmth and worry.
"Please take this," she said gently.
Naruto paused, eye narrowing behind the eyepatch. "I didn't exactly help you get customers today."
Ayame shook her head quickly. "You don't understand. Someone like Idate spreading the word? That'll help us a lot. Rumors spread fast—especially from loudmouths like him. People will hear the ramen here is the best."
She held out a small wrapped bundle and a folded envelope. "So please… take our gift."
Naruto looked down at the offering. Two full days of packed ramen meals—and five hundred ryō tucked into the envelope. Small by shinobi standards, but for a boy with nothing, it was… something.
He blinked once, surprised despite himself.
"See you around, Teuchi-ojisan. Ayame-nee-san."
Ayame smiled warmly. "Come anytime, Naruto."
Naruto turned and stepped through the curtain, cloak fluttering. Snow met him again as he walked down the quiet street, hands slipping back into his pockets.
He had taken only three steps when Teuchi's voice rang out from behind him.
"Naruto! Please come back again!" he shouted, voice full of sincerity. "We always welcome you here!"
Naruto didn't look back. He only raised one hand, giving a silent wave, and continued walking into the winter night.
Naruto didn't look back. He only raised one hand, giving a silent wave, and continued walking into the winter night.
He walked for twenty minutes straight, boots crunching through frosted streets, breath rising in small clouds. The village felt colder than usual—not because of the snow, but because of how empty it felt. Familiar houses. Familiar roads. A world he technically knew, yet no longer belonged to.
Finally, he reached his apartment. The door was rusted, the frame loose, the lock barely functioning—an entrance that matched his old life a little too well.
Naruto pushed it open and stepped inside.
The stale air welcomed him with the usual mess: expired food shoved in corners, wrappers scattered across the floor, an unmade bed leaning against the wall. A lonely, neglected space that never felt like home. Just a lonely space in a world that never cared if he lived or died.
Naruto stepped inside quietly.
Every time I opened the door to my penthouse on the higher plane, I always checked every single corner.
Just in case Lambda or Bern tried to pull a prank on me.But… that kept me warm. And chained. Those two Voyager bitches never gave me peace.
He sighed and snapped his fingers.
A pulse of warped reality swept through the apartment. Trash folded itself into neat bags. Dust vanished in a blink. The bed arranged itself. Old food evaporated. The whole room organized itself around him, clean, tidy, functional.
A poor man's home scrubbed by the touch of a god.
Naruto dropped onto the chair, letting the cloak fall loosely around him. He set the ramen bundle and the envelope on the table, leaning back with one hand over his eyepatch.
Time to review my situation fast.What I don't have.And what I still have.
He closed his eye for a moment, running down the list with the precision of someone who'd rebuilt his power dozens of times across hundreds of loops.
"I still have my cane sword," he muttered, tapping the handle lightly with his fingers. "And Weirdmageddon—my primary power source. Nerfed, but intact."
"And I still have my main connection… the Nightmare Realm." His voice dropped slightly, a subtle echo of something older than the world he stood in. "If I die here, I recover there. And that's where I'm strongest."
He lifted his cane, watching the faint flicker of blue flame coil around the tip before fading.
"But I'm low. Too low. And there are only two ways to bring Weirdmageddon back to its original height."
He raised one finger.
"First option: shake hands. God knows how many. As long as the deal completes, the power comes back."
"Second option: weaken the world barrier. Increase my range. Turn two hundred fifty-one meters… into kilometers."
"There are other methods too—but those paths aren't explored yet. So I'll have to get creative. Use everything in this world just to restore what I lost."
Naruto lowered his hand and flexed his fingers, drawing a faint shimmer of mana into his palm. A crackle of magic sparked—clean, controlled—like a miniature Firaga burning without heat. He twirled it once, amused.
Well… at least I'm not a muggle.
The flame vanished with a snap.
"Enough reviewing," Naruto muttered. "Time for the real problem."
He leaned forward, elbows on his knees, eye narrowed as the losses lined up in his mind like dead stars.
"I lost a lot. And not just junk."
He exhaled slowly. "Black Materia—gone. My contracts with the Astral gods like Shiva—nulled. Entire systems I built over centuries wiped clean."
He clicked his tongue, irritation cutting through his voice. I'm starting to think I got pranked by Lambda.She's the one who pushed me to escape early.
Naruto leaned back again, cloak settling across the chair, a quiet, sharp smile forming behind the eyepatch. "Yeah… this reeks of Lambda."
The smile lingered as he slid into bed, pulling the thin blanket over himself. No vulnerability. No openings. Even in sleep, he wrapped his consciousness in layered defenses—mental traps, folded dimensions, and recursive thought loops. Anyone trying to probe him would fall into a maze, and even Bernkastel would need effort to pry through it.