Bao Ji (Lia)
The street was warm, alive with noise and colour, and for once, my thoughts weren't racing ahead to tomorrow or circling around consequences.
I was walking side by side with the Emperor. Not rushed steps. Just slow ones.
Since we arrived, we hadn't talked, yet I could feel his gaze on me. Even from the corner of my eyes, I could tell it never shifted from me for a single second.
My eyes wandered from stall to stall, but nothing truly caught my attention. Every time I paused to look at something, the emperor followed my gaze, trying to see what I was looking at.
Seeing him do this, I half expected him to say, "I'll buy it," or something similar. But to my surprise, he didn't. Instead, he simply stood beside me, hands behind his back, quietly following my gaze.
He was waiting for me to say I wanted something.
Then my eyes caught a man selling tanghulu. They widened instantly with excitement.
"Wait here for a moment," the Emperor said, then took off.
Before I could even react, he was already buying one for me. I smiled immediately.
"Here you go," he said gently, handing it to me.
"Thank you," I replied with a smile. He smiled back.
Before taking a bite, I asked, "Do you want to try some?"
"No. Eat it," he said in that same gentle, low voice.
We continued walking as I enjoyed the tanghulu. I didn't care about anything else anymore.
"Eat slowly," he said, amused.
I just nodded, barely paying attention.
"There's a stall with hairpins and accessories," he said, pointing. "Do you want to have a look?"
"Sure," I replied, finishing the last bite.
The accessories were beautiful, but none of them caught my eye.
"Which one do you want?" he asked.
I shook my head. "I don't want any."
To my surprise, he didn't pressure me. He didn't run from stall to stall buying things and pushing them into my hands like he used to do with Bao Si. Instead, he let me decide.
He respected my choice.
As we started walking again, I couldn't stop myself from looking at him and smiling.
Look forward, Lia. Stop staring.
But I couldn't. I simply couldn't bring myself to do it.
He noticed and smiled back, saying nothing. We just looked at each other, smiling.
Suddenly, he grabbed my arm and pulled me against his chest. I froze for a moment—then I noticed a group of children were running wildly towards us, almost bumping into me.
I looked up at him and saw anger on his face.
"Don't you dare shout at them or do something reckless," I said immediately.
He met my gaze. "But—"
I interrupted him. "They're just kids. It's fine."
He took a deep breath, then exhaled. "Fine. I'll let it slide."
"Good," I said.
The staring returned.
I was still close to his chest. I could smell him and feel the solid strength beneath me. I didn't pull away.
Stop it, Lia. You'll regret this later.
I told myself that again and again. But right now, I didn't care. I couldn't bring myself to care.
He cleared his throat, snapping me out of it. I stepped back.
Just one step.
"Are you hungry?" he asked gently.
I nodded, my cheeks burning.
He looked around, then pointed behind me. "Let's eat here."
I turned and realised it was the same place where I had ordered him turtle soup.
"Here?" I asked.
"Relax," he said with a teasing smile. "I won't order turtle soup. Unless—"
"Don't you even think about it."
"What?" he asked innocently.
"Let's just go. I'm starving," I said, giving him a side-eye.
Inside, we took a seat at a more secluded table. The waiter came over.
The Emperor looked at me with a wide grin.
"Don't you dare," I warned him.
He laughed and ordered noodle soup, chicken, and a few other dishes.
"It really is good, that turtle soup," he teased. "And here you are hating it."
"God, that bloody turtle soup," I said, irritated but playful. "It still gives me nightmares."
"Why? It's a delicacy."
"A what?" I stared at him. "Maybe for you. For me, it's a nightmare. Thanks to someone."
He looked around. "Thanks to whom?"
"I wonder," I replied, leaning a little closer, still holding his gaze.
We both burst out laughing just as the waiter returned, visibly startled—probably more by seeing the Emperor laughing so casually.
When the waiter turned to leave, I stopped him.
"Could you bring some wine too?"
"No wine," the Emperor said firmly.
The waiter froze.
"You drank last night. That's enough," he added gently.
I wanted to argue, but he was right. I drank too much last night, and this morning I felt awful. Even now, I still had a slight headache—one I'd completely forgotten about while he was with me.
"Okay," I muttered sadly, then turned to the waiter. "We don't need wine. You can go."
The waiter bowed quickly and fled.
"You scared the poor man," I said, trying not to smile.
I shouldn't have been smiling. There was nothing funny about it—yet I still found it amusing. The poor man probably thought he was about to be executed.
"I didn't do anything," he replied. "I just said no."
"Your serious face and authority make people tremble."
"Even you?" he asked.
I met his gaze. "No. Not me. I'm not afraid."
It was true. I never truly had been.
"Let's eat," he said.
After we finished, we stepped outside and looked around, unsure which direction to go.
"Do you want to go back to the palace, or…?" he asked.
"We can—unless you have something in mind," I said, glancing around.
"If you do, say it. We can go."
We stared at each other, then laughed.
It was silly.
"We go back?" he asked.
"Yeah," I replied, laughing.
Outside my room, we stopped.
The day had passed far too quickly. I wished time would stop.
What was I thinking?
"You might be tired," he said. "I'll go."
"You might be tired too," I replied with a smile. "Go rest."
He nodded, taking small steps backward.
I still didn't move. My mind screamed, 'Go inside,' but my legs refused to cooperate.
"Go in," he said.
"I will after you leave."
"I'll leave after you go in."
"Oh God," I laughed, shaking my head, then turned and went inside.
My maid was already there, smiling widely, but I sent her out immediately, saying I wanted to sleep.
Now I lie in bed, questioning my very existence.
What the hell was in my head? What was that behaviour?
And yet—I smiled.
I even slapped myself, trying to stop it. It didn't work.
Out of everything possible and impossible, the only thing that made me smile was the Emperor and the time we spent together today.
Lia, snap out of it. It was just a normal day. He probably does the same with other concubines.
But then—
Why did it feel so special?