It was foolish of me to think that Asher and I could build something, that we could be happy together. I was never meant to be his wife forever, I was the stand in and I knew that when we were told I wasn't pregnant. Maybe that is why I was never really pregnant because if I was Asher and Ari would not get back together. Even their stupid names seemed to fit together perfectly.
"So you are really going through with this?" Eloise asked, I had spent the night at her house. I didn't want to see Asher, didn't want to talk about it. "Yes, do it fast without thinking much, like ripping a band aid," I said.
"What if Asher doesn't you know, want to get back with Ari," Eloise said as she handed me a mug of coffee and a plate filled with eggs, sausages and left over mac and cheese.
"Well the hug yesterday said otherwise," I said.
"So from a hug you think Asher wants to end this?"
"Yes and No. We were never really married Eloise, by paper yes but really no. His heart always belonged to her and yesterday maybe all that connection we had was from my side and he maybe wanted to make me feel better before he told me my sister was back and he wanted to be with her," I explained to her. Eloise sighed, she knew I had made my mind up, it was time I woke up. This bubble I wanted to live in had to pop, I wasn't going to stick around and fight for something that was never mine.
I spent the rest of the day with Eloise planning what I would do after the divorce, "Well i do have a lot of money from all the money I received and never spent so at least I have somewhere to start from," I said.
"Show me how much it is," Eloise said. I opened my bank app and showed her my balance. "1 million dollars!" Eloise said in a surprised voice. I smiled with pride but Eloise didn't look impressed. "Four years of marriage to a multimillionaire CEO who belongs to a billionaire family and all you have is a Million dollars? What have you been failing to do?"
"It's not enough?"
"No, not even half enough. Girl the emotional stress, humiliation, lonely nights, lonely days, gossip and reputation does not amount to a million dollars. Ask for more, you deserve it. Enjoy it all before divorce," she said looking determined. She was right though but more than the money I wanted to be away from anything to do with the Sterling family, start over.
Later that day, I made my way back home. When I got there I found a lot of men in black standing before an angry Asher, I made my way in and as soon as his eyes landed on me he looked relief. "Zaliyah Sterling, where have you been?" he asked as he made his way to me. " I was with my friend Eloise, did something happen?" I asked looking at all the men in the lounge area, " You are all dismissed," Asher said as he held my hand and we walked to the couch.
"Why were you not answering your phone?"
"I needed some time alone," I answered.
"About Ari and what you saw-"
"Don't worry I understand Asher, you don't have to explain anything."
"Oh."
"I will be gone before you know it," I said and he looked at me confused like I was speaking a foreign language. "Going where?"
"Somewhere, I haven't decided yet," I said and he looked even more confused.
"You and Ari, I won't interfere. I will make way for her, she was your first love," I said and he realized what I was talking about. He didn't say anything, he didn't comment he was just quiet, meaning he had been thinking about it. "I am quite tired, I am going to bed," I said as I stood up, he looked at me like he wanted to say something, say more but he couldn't say anything. My heart sank a little bit, I hoped that maybe he would prove me wrong but he didn't even try or say a word.
That night I texted a divorce lawyer and asked him to bring me divorce papers tomorrow morning, the quicker we did this the better. My parents didn't even bother to inform me about Ari's return but I understood that they always wanted Ari to be the one to marry Asher and when Asher and I got married they were not happy about my marriage they took it as a way of me holding my sister's position until she returned, until she came back and I am sure they are happy she is back.
The next morning the lawyer had brought the papers, all that was left was for Asher and I to sign and it would be finalized. I looked at the papers the thing that was going to end this four year long marriage, it was over a long time ago but this was like the final stamp to it. After the lawyer left, I went up to my room to pack my things as I was in my room someone knocked on my door, when I opened the door I saw her,
"Ari," I said as she stood in front of me with her bright smile.
"Zeee!!" she said as she came in for a hug, I didn't bother returning.
"I missed you so much," she said as she looked at me expecting me to react or something but I had no reaction whatsoever for her. How could she come back like everything is perfect, like everything was alright, like she didn't just disappear leaving everyone to pick up the pieces she had left. Because of her Asher was in pain and went drinking and because of that Asher and I slept together and because of that I thought I was pregnant and then Asher and I got marred but mostly because of her I was married to a man whose heart would never belong to me and here she was smiling at me and calling me pet names.
"Why are you here?" I asked her folding my arms at her.
"Oh, clearly we are still angry," she said.
"Yes, you can't just show up here like you have always been here."
"I know, I know but I missed you a lot Zee!!" She said walking into my room and sitting on my bed. She looked around and a frown appeared on her face, "This was your room?"
"Yes," I replied going back to packing.
"You have changed, you always decorated your space and made anyone who walked in know it was your space, but this room is just plain."
"Things change, they don't stop just because you ran away," I said rolling my eyes and as the words left my mouth I could see the pain in her eyes, I felt bad but she deserved it.
"I am sorry, I will explain everything to you."
I ignored her, she had to either way. " So you are living? I heard you married Asher. Why?"
"Well since you ran away everyone thought it was a bright idea for me to stand in for you Ari, so that when your majesty came back she would just come and sit on a warm throne, maybe a cold one," I said sarcastically, if she thought we would bond she was wrong and I couldn't tell her that I thought I was pregnant, no one knew about that incident except Asher, Eloise and I. I so badly wanted to tell her that but I couldn't, I felt guilty for even sleeping with her boyfriend simply because she had run away I had no right.
"I am sorry but I am back now. I will make things right. I will fix everything."
I ignored her statement, she couldn't fix this.
"Why are you packing your bags?" Asher asked as he stood by the door of my bedroom door. Great the couple decided to visit my room. " Because I am leaving."
"Leaving to where?"
Was this man dumb or what? I had told him yesterday the reason and he is asking me all of this again. "Somewhere, my place or maybe Eloise's for today," I said.
"But this is your place, is something wrong with this room?"
"Asher I am leaving this house?"
"Why?"
"Because you and I are getting a divorce?" I said, frustrated at his questions.
"Who said we are?"
"I am divorcing you Asher," I said looking at him and he seemed irritated.
"You are not going anywhere Zaliyah so you better stop packing," he said as she approached me. "Asher we don't have to make this hard."
"What?"
"This whole thing Asher, Ari is back your first love is back and don't lie to me and tell me that it doesn't change a thing. I was just a stand in and you know it. Ari is back and you don't have to feel bad for me, I always knew that this was never going to work. This marriage was dead from the beginning so please stop asking me where I am going or why I am going. I was waiting for Ari to come back for me to leave," I said frustrated. I left the clothes I was packing and walked out of the room. I made my way to study room and closed the door. I couldn't stop my tears, Why was I crying? Why did my heart hurt so much? I knew this day will one day come but why does it seem so unfair?