Instead of morning exercise, I sat wiping a rusted robot head with a rag. Romance is dead, gentlemen.
The robot I found last night wasn't just scrap metal. After wiping away the dust and grime, I saw that its chassis wasn't made of ordinary metal, but of some smooth, white ceramic and polymer alloy. Its shape... well, let's just say its designer clearly had "aesthetic taste."
The robot was female.
No, not just "female-looking." This thing was explicitly an Android built with perfect proportions. Its face (the head currently in my hand) was as delicate as a porcelain doll's, looking mysterious even with its eyes closed.
"Well, hello beautiful," I said to the head. "Whoever made you seems to have thought about things other than war."
[Object: Combat-Medic Android (Model: "Valkyrie" E-01)]
[Condition: Critical (Decapitated, no power core, BIOS system formatted)]
[Restoration Cost: 35 Ether]
35 Ether. That's expensive. But I have 110 Ether right now (after fully resting).
The problem is, this body's own "brain," its personality, has been wiped. "BIOS formatted" means it's just an empty shell. Perfect. I will transfer Aidos into this void.
But first, I want to play a little "joke."
As a Restorer, I feel I can not only return things to their original state but also modify them as I wish.
I laid my body, rather the robot's body, on the table. Brought the head close to the neck.
Placed my hand on the crack in its chest.
"Here we go."
A stream of Ether flowed out like a river.
Blue light filled the room. I watched the metal grow "alive." Severed cables twisted like snakes and connected to the ports in the neck. The ceramic coating smoothed out, rust and burnt spots turning a milky white.
[Process ongoing...]
[System rebooting...]
[Voice module detected.]
I entered the "Voice Module" settings. (Yes, through my System, I can see the object's internal menu).
Default setting: [Military Tactical Voice (Male/Neutral)].
"Boring," I said, wrinkling my nose.
I scrolled down the list.
[Options:]
* Robotic Servant (Monotone)
* Commander (Gruff)
* Secret Package: "Tsundere" (Personal Assistant)
My eyes lit up. I couldn't stop myself from laughing imagining an old, grumpy uncle like Aidos speaking in a "Tsundere" voice.
"Sorry, Aidos. This is just for science," I said and selected the [Tsundere (Female)] package.
Additionally, in the [Character Matrix] section, I added the parameter "Slightly moody and jealous." Why? Because I'm lonely and I love drama.
Restoration complete.
The robot was whole. It wasn't moving yet, but the indicator on its chest began to pulse slowly with a green light thump-thump.
Now for the hardest part. Bringing Aidos.
I can't carry this massive robot 2 km. It weighs at least 150 kilos.
So... do I just take the head? No, I've already attached the head; detaching it might break it.
Wait a second.
There was a small slot on the back of the robot, just below the neck.
[Memory Module (Empty)].
I took the Crystal I got from the Rusted Hound yesterday out of my pocket. It was a memory storage device too!
What if I write Aidos onto this crystal?
It was a theory. But worth a try.
Noon. In front of the Bunker.
I'm back in front of that old guard booth. This time I have a clear plan.
I approached Aidos's terminal. The monitor was off.
"Hey, are you sleeping, metal-head?" I said, tapping on the glass.
The screen flickered on. Aidos's pixelated face appeared. He looked tired (if a pixel can be tired).
"Citizen Liam. You returned. I assumed you had become food for the spiders and opened a small mourning folder for you in my memory."
"Don't be so quick to bury me," I said smiling. "I found you a new home."
I showed the crystal in my hand.
"Can you fit on this 'Flash drive'?"
Aidos "looked" at the crystal (via camera).
"This is... High-Density Ether Crystal. Theoretically, my core kernel will fit. But I will have to leave behind my cat video collection. This is a great loss."
"Don't cry. I'll record you a new one later. So, how do we do this?"
Aidos gave instructions on the screen. I opened the bottom part of the console and inserted the crystal into a specific slot.
"I am initiating the transfer," Aidos said. "But be warned, this process might be painful. That is, not for you, for me. Compressing my data is like a fat man trying to fit into skinny jeans."
The screen glowed green. The console began to shake.
[Transfer: 10%... 40%... 85%...]
Aidos's face on the screen distorted, making strange noises.
"Oooo! My drivers! Be careful!"
And suddenly the screen went dark.
Silence.
The crystal was now glowing bright green.
I pulled it out.
"Heavy," I said, weighing the crystal in my palm. "The history of an entire civilization and one bureaucrat in my pocket."
The return trip was easier. There were no spiders on the bridge (they probably dislike the smell of their burnt brethren). I reached the garage quickly.
Operating room (that is, the table in the garage).
I placed the crystal into the slot on the Valkyrie robot's neck.
The crystal clicked into place with a snap.
I stepped back and picked up the wrench. Just in case. If it wakes up as a "Terminator" now, I'll hit it on the head.
A minute of silence.
Then the robot's eyes opened.
They weren't lifeless like before. They lit up a bright, neon blue.
The robot's fingers moved. It slowly lifted its head and looked at its hands.
Then it looked at me.
Its mouth opened.
I expected Aidos's gruff, robotic voice. "CITIZEN LIAM, WHERE DID YOU PUT ME..."
But instead, a melodious, slightly flirtatious, and very feminine voice filled the room:
"Oh my... What is this? My hands... they are so... smooth?"
I couldn't hold back my laughter.
"Welcome, Ms. Aidos. Do you like your new body?"
The robot (Aidos) jumped up (with great agility, which surprised even itself). It looked in the mirror and saw its reflection.
"What... what is this?!" it shrieked. There was panic in the voice, but thanks to the "Tsundere" package, it sounded like a bratty girl yelling "My hairstyle is ruined!"
"Why do I have armor plates on my chest? Why does my voice sound like an anime character?! Liam! What have you done?!"
"I 'updated' you," I said shrugging, with a silly grin on my face. "Now you are not just an old computer. You are a Valkyrie. By the way, the voice settings might be stuck; it takes another 50 Ether to change them. And I have no Ether. Sorry."
Aidos (I could call her Eve now, but let Aidos stay) glared at me with fury.
"Are you... are you mocking me? Me, the guardian of the Grand Archive, am now... now..."
She put her hands on her hips (this gesture must have been in her programming).
"...now I look like your personal doll? This is a disgrace! This is... this is illogical! But..."
She suddenly stopped and extended a small laser blade from her fingertip.
"...but the combat parameters of this body are amazing. Processor speed increased by 500 times."
She approached me. Her eyes narrowed.
"Listen here, you idiot Restorer. If you don't turn off this voice, I will strangle you in your sleep."
"Aww," I said. "You sound so sweet when you threaten me!"
Aidos seemed to blush from anger (the LEDs on her face turned red).
"System error! Emotion module overloading! You... you... are an idiot!"
Just then, that terrible howling was heard outside again.
It wasn't yesterday's creature. This time the sound came from closer and there were more of them.
And the garage door boomed from a heavy impact.
Aidos's (Eve's) face suddenly turned serious. The flirtatious expression in her eyes vanished, replaced by cold, martial calculation.
"Analysis," she said, her voice changing slightly (but still a girl's). "4 objects outside. Type: Rusted Wolves. Threat Level: Medium."
She looked at me and extended the laser blade on her hand.
"Well, master. Shall we test the new toy? Just don't die, or who will recharge me?"
I gripped "Excalibur" and checked the pistol.
"Now that's more like it. Let's go, beautiful. We'll have our first 'Date' on the battlefield."
We walked towards the door. Me and my "slightly moody girlfriend whose body is a highly dangerous weapon and inside whom lives an old bureaucrat."
This world was getting more and more interesting.