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Translator: uly
Chapter: 1
Chapter Title: Playing a Martial Arts Dating Sim
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"Senior, you said you write novels while working at the company, right? I made a dating sim this time, could you check the story for me?"
I ended up in this absurd situation because of a suggestion from my junior from university.
"I'm busy preparing a new work after work. What do you mean, check a story?"
"Please, hyung. If this game gets released, I'll put your name in the credits. You're not working at the company and writing novels because you want to do company work your whole life, right? Who knows, having your name here might come in handy for you someday."
No, I just got a job because it's hard to make a living solely from writing mass-produced novels. But still, you never know how life turns out, and I had just finished one work and had some free time, so I accepted the offer.
And that was the biggest mistake of my life.
The start was good.
"Wow. Why are the heroines so pretty?"
When I started the game, two heroines greeted me. One was a lively-looking heroine with a Western appearance and blonde hair. The other was a brown-haired heroine with a melancholy expression that exuded Eastern beauty.
They were beautiful characters on a level where you'd think they could get a hundred-million-won salary at a game company right now.
If the illustrations are this pretty, how well must the game be made?
"The setting seems to be martial arts."
Why did it have to be martial arts? The entry barrier is a bit high.
Even though I write mass-produced web novels, I don't write martial arts. Compared to other genres, the entry barrier for readers is high, and it's the same for writers.
With illustrations of this quality, they could have made at least their money back and more if they had just set it in fantasy or a modern background.
"Well, it's good for me, a martial arts fan."
I may not be a martial arts writer, but I'm a hardcore martial arts reader. My first genre novel was martial arts, and I still make sure to read any quality martial arts story.
So what if martial arts has an entry barrier? I'm a hardcore martial arts reader, a martial otaku, who can always rocket jump right in, so it doesn't matter.
And on top of that, it's a martial arts dating sim.
Mount Hua Sect. North Sea Ice Palace. Namgung Family. Dang Family. South Sea Putuo Temple. Emei Sect. Isn't this a genre where heroines filled with all sorts of clichés can appear?
I'd also like a unique heroine who doesn't belong to a sect or family. Romance with martial arts heroines I've imagined, paired with such beautiful illustrations. It was more exciting than I imagined.
I started the game with that excitement.
But this game threw a straight punch at my excitement right from the start.
The first scene where the protagonist meets one of the heroines.
[That red hair. You must be from the Mount Hua Sect.]
[Brilliant blonde hair. What is a member of the Imperial Family doing here?]
"What?"
Why is the Mount Hua Sect red-haired? And the Imperial Clan is blonde?
There are settings like someone's hair turning red from excessively cultivating fire arts, or the North Sea Ice Palace having silver hair from extreme ice arts, but the Imperial Clan being blonde and the Mount Hua Sect having red hair?
Surely they didn't think of the 'fire' character in Mount Hua's name.
Since it's a dating sim, it's probably a setting to highlight the characters' personalities. But still, it's martial arts, so they'd keep the basic framework, right? With uneasy expectations, I continued playing.
[Excuse me, how much is a bowl of noodles here?]
[One bowl of noodles is 5 copper coins!]
"???????"
It only took a few minutes for those expectations to crumble.
Is this like those popular martial arts memes lately? Energy Circulation Breathing. Energy Brunch. Energy Dinner. Please use the kiosk during Energy Brunch Time. That kind of thing? Why doesn't carbonara come out?
[Young hero. When treating a lady, you should order at least carbonara, not noodles.]
[Ah! So the noodles weren't good after all?]
".... Is this a comedy?"
I let out a hollow laugh, utterly dumbfounded. What on earth is going to unfold? Since it was content that defied common sense, I decided to keep going.
After progressing the story a bit, a flashback scene of the Princess heroine appeared.
[I don't want to have a political marriage with the man Father chose. I'm going to go out into the martial world and marry the most famous man!]
[Young lady! What a dangerous thing to say! The outside world is overflowing with dangerous martial artists!]
[Then I'll just become a martial artist too! I brought a few roots of Ten-Thousand-Year Snow Ginseng from the Imperial secret vault.]
[Young lady! If His Majesty the Emperor finds out, it'll be a disaster!]
[Enough, just keep watch for anyone coming. I'm going to eat this and become a martial artist.]
[I don't know, seriously....]
[I absorbed all 5 roots of the Ten-Thousand-Year Snow Ginseng. Now no one can beat me. I'll go out into the martial world and marry the most famous man.]
She absorbed all 5 roots of the Ten-Thousand-Year Snow Ginseng and became the undisputed strongest in the martial world. And so, she came out into the world to marry the most famous man in the martial world.
[SYSTEM: To see the ending with the Princess heroine, the Fame stat is most important.]
".... What?"
No training. No real combat. No enlightenment. She just ate some miraculous medicine and became the strongest in the martial world?
"I am not a martial otaku. I am not a martial otaku."
Hold on. My left hand's black goat... no, martial otaku.
Suppressing the nature of the martial otaku trying to run wild, I played the game for a day, then two. And a week later.
"Damn it!! This isn't martial arts!! And it's not a dating sim either!!"
In my studio apartment, I screamed after seeing the ending of this utterly chaotic game.
The game scenario was simple.
A 'red-haired' protagonist who trains in martial arts and enters the martial world.
If you raise your Fame stat, you end up with the Princess heroine. If you save money, you end up with the Murong Family heroine.
The problem was that it was a failure both as martial arts and as a dating sim.
As a martial otaku, there were countless things to nitpick about the martial arts aspect, but the biggest issue was the dating sim part.
What is a dating sim? The male protagonist develops himself while building relationships with female heroines. Then he chooses one and presents a touching exchange or a salvation narrative. And it continues.
But this game was not like that.
The center of all events and narratives was not the protagonist, but the Princess heroine.
'Boo hoo hoo! Protagonist-emon. Something sad happened to me!'
'Boo hoo hoo! Protagonist-emon. I caused trouble. Fix it for me!'
And so, the protagonist became Protagonist-emon, cleaning up after the Princess heroine.
'Why are you so weak? I guess I have to solve everything!'
'I ran away from the Imperial Palace, so if I become famous, it'll be a big problem. I solved it, but let's say you did.'
The cool scenes are all taken by the Princess, and the protagonist just gets the credit.
After a while, it starts to feel like the protagonist is just training in martial arts and raising his fame to become the heroine's trophy.
What kind of dating sim is this? It's just a female-lead romance fantasy.
If you don't like this heroine, can't you just choose the other one? When I actually tried to do that, suddenly speed bumps appeared to block that route.
"How can you put a widow villainess as one of only two heroines?"
A widow who is a villainess. That was the setting for the other route's heroine, the Murong Family heroine.
[Hmm. You seem to be getting along well with that woman lately. You know what? That woman. They say she killed the man she married on their wedding night. And then she swallowed up all the assets of her husband's family. You'd better not get close to her?]
What kind of heroine is this?
Since there are dating sim clichés, it will probably be revealed later that it was all a misunderstanding. Thinking that, I endured and continued, but it was even more ridiculous.
[The Murong Family only wanted the assets of that man's family and tried to marry me off.]
[On the day we first met, he said he bought me with money and told me to get ready to throw a tantrum in bed.]
A typical unwanted marriage story where the heroine is blameless and it's all the ex-husband's fault. Is that it?
[Isn't it too harsh to have to marry a man you don't love? So I sent fake evidence in advance to frame his family for treason.]
What...?
[I wish you could have seen his expression when he heard the news of his family's treason. Seeing his face contorted in despair was more satisfying than any other moment.]
[When he rushed into the bridal chamber saying he'd at least take me, and I killed him, the feeling was truly relieving. And as a reward for exposing the treason, all the assets of the annihilated man went to me, his wife.]
[Even after hearing this story, can you still love me?]
No. I can't. You bitch.
I mean, what kind of heroines are these?
A nuisance heroine? A villainess heroine? In the end, I chose the nuisance Princess.
The conditions for the Murong Family heroine route were also problematic. The stat needed for the Princess heroine was Fame. For the Murong Family, it was Money.
Fame could be gained sufficiently by doing only good and righteous chivalrous deeds, but to earn money, it forced you into dirty deeds or cowardly choices.
"Hand over the sole surviving child witness from the massacred village for 100 gold. Protect them for 100 Fame points. This crosses the line."
So I ended up taking the Princess route. The ending was the protagonist becoming the most famous in the martial world, marrying the Princess, and becoming the Imperial Son-in-Law.
When you see a dating sim ending, you're supposed to think, 'I hope they lived happily ever after,' but I felt sorry for the protagonist being sold off as the heroine in the Princess's slapstick operation.
What kind of martial arts dating sim is this? It's a female-lead romance fantasy with a martial arts skin.
Grrr. I can't stand it anymore.
"I have to give some angry feedback."
I originally planned to do both routes, but I'll write after doing just one.
In case my junior might get hurt if I wrote in a strong tone, I tried to sound it out, but he said he wasn't the scenario person in charge. He said they needed honest feedback, so to write without holding back.
"Receive the sharp feedback of an angry novelist, martial otaku, and otaku!"
And so, I wrote over 30 pages of criticism disguised as feedback, sent it to the scenario person in charge, and fell asleep.
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"Young master, I can see the Murong Family estate over there!"
In the distance, the Murong Family's manor filled the horizon.
".... Right."
"If the person going to get married has such a stiff expression, people will gossip."
".... I'm going to die soon anyway."
"Huh?"
"I just gave the feedback they asked for... does possession make any sense...."
Ha.
It wasn't even a hate comment.
I just gave feedback.
I got possessed into a dating sim.
And as the groom who gets killed by the heroine's hand on his wedding night.