Consciousness returned in stages. First came the sound of dripping water. Plink. Plink. Plink. A slow, rhythmic cadence that was oddly calming. Then came the feeling of something hard and unyielding beneath me—definitely not my memory foam mattress. The air smelled of damp earth, moss, and something else. Something metallic and clean. Like fresh blood.
I cracked my eyes open. I was no longer in the ruined temple. I was in a cave. The ceiling was high enough to be lost in shadow, but faint, blue-tinged light filtered in from somewhere, illuminating the rocky walls and the small, crystal-clear pool of water from which the dripping sound originated. My head was pillowed on something that was both warm and firm. I turned my head slightly and found myself staring directly at ...Angus.
Which is not nearly the view I would have preferred, if I'm honest. The angel was huddled on the stone floor next to me, wings wrapped around himself like a feathery cocoon, legs underneath my head..
"Violet! You're awake!" he stage-whispered, not via text box, but with actual spoken words. His real voice was even more chipper than his telepathic notifications. "Oh, thank the Goddess! You're okay! Of course, I knew that you would be! But also I'm glad. Because you're okay!"
...I can't say I'm thrilled by his mixed messaging.
I tried to sit up, but a heavy weight across my stomach stopped me. I looked down. A tanned, muscular leg. My eyes, traitorous things that they are, traveled up from the leg, over the ridiculously defined muscles of a thigh, to a lean hip, where the only scrap of clothing was a silk loincloth that did very little to hide the… anatomy beneath. My gaze continued its upward journey, over the sharp planes of an abdomen that looked like it had been carved from marble, and further still, to the expanse of a broad chest rising and falling with steady breaths.
My SSS-Ranked Problem. Was asleep in the cave nearby, apparently using me as a foot rest. Or something. His head was leaning against the rock wall behind him, eyes closed, face relaxed. Without the burning fury, he looked less like a vengeful god and more like a very, very handsome sculpture that had come to life and decided to take a nap. On me.
"He fell asleep after carrying you here." Angus chirped, helpful as always. Which was...maybe not particularly helpful. "I think that when you pass out it also drains him."
"Think...? Isn't the necklace one of your heavenly special deals?" I pushed the leg off me.
...I attempted to push the leg off me.
It did not move.
"W-well! The special Bindings of the Goddess Titania are very powerful and complicated! There's a whole 8,000 page manual I didn't get to read! But it's probably something like that!" Angus's wings fluttered nervously.
I stopped trying to push the leg. Instead, I just kind of...wiggled my body along the floor, like a very awkward snake trying to escape from under a very heavy, very warm, and very muscular pin. The movement, however small, was enough to rouse him. The demon king's eyes snapped open, the purple immediately focusing on me. The leg, which had been a dead weight, suddenly shifted, pinning me with deliberate pressure against my stomach.
He was much worse when he was awake.
"Gruh." I said, which was about as eloquent as I could get with my stomach being not so gently compressed.
His gaze was flat. "You are awake."
He said it like this was an inconvenience to him.
Probably because my continued existence was, in fact, an inconvenience to him. The leg remained a very heavy, very warm, and very definite presence on my stomach.
"Congratulations on mastering stating the obvious," I wheezed out.
"Your continued breathing is an offense to my senses," he replied, as if we were discussing the weather. He still did not move his leg. "It is a grating reminder of the indignity I suffer."
The leg pressed down just a little bit more. A reminder.
"Get...off...me..." I managed to say, my words sounding less like a command and more like a deflating balloon.
He just stared down at me. The necklace he wore pulsed once, a faint, almost imperceptible flicker of golden light. His jaw tightened. I could feel a faint, dizzying lurch in my own head, like the moment just before you faint.
He sighed, a long-suffering, utterly put-upon sound. With a motion that was almost too fast to follow, he removed the leg and rose to his feet in a single fluid motion. He turned away from me, presenting me with a view of his ridiculously well-defined back. His shoulder blades were a landscape of muscle and bone that would make a sculptor weep.
"You are a pathetic creature," he said, his back still to me. "Weak. Fragile. And you are my jailer. The irony is… nauseating."
[PRO-TIP FROM ANGUS! (●'◡'●)] A new text box appeared in my vision. [Giving direct orders to SSS-Rank summons can be very draining! Try asking nicely! Maybe offer him a snack! 🍪]
I blinked at the text box. Then I looked at the bare-chested demon king radiating menace at the other end of the cave. The thought of offering him a cookie was so absurd I almost laughed. Almost.
I pushed myself up into a sitting position, my head swimming. "I'm not your jailer," I said, rubbing my temples. "I'm the winner of a cosmic lottery I didn't even enter. We're both victims here."
He turned back to face me, a look of absolute contempt on his face. "Never again presume to equate your pathetic existence with mine, insect." He took a step toward the pool of water and knelt, cupping a handful of the clear liquid in his palm. "You are a worm who stumbled upon a dragon's egg and thinks herself its mother."
He splashed the water on his face. It ran in rivulets down his neck and chest, tracing paths through the dust and grime of the temple. My brain, that useless, traitorous organ, decided this was a prime opportunity to admire the way the water droplets clung to his skin.
"I'm not...okay, that was a weird metaphor, but I get the point," I said, shaking my head to clear it. I needed to focus. "So. This demon lord. The one I'm supposed to fight. Where is he?"
The demon king looked at me over his shoulder, his wet blonde hair plastered to the side of his face. "The self-proclaimed 'Demon King' of this miserable little world? You expect me to know the whereabouts of that insect?" He scoffed, turning back to the water. "I have been here for all of an hour. In which I have been shackled, ogled, and forced to endure the company of a winged rat and a witless mortal. My reconnaissance has been somewhat limited."
Angus's feathers ruffled indignantly, but he wisely kept his mouth shut.
[GUEST STAR INFO! (｀・ω・´)] Angus's text popped up. [The current Demon Lord's fortress is located in the Cursed Lands to the north! It's a super spooky and dangerous place! Full of meanies!]
Great.
How was I supposed to get this angry slab of meat to go to the north if ordering him made me dizzy...?
I didn't have any cookies on me. The thought alone was enough to make a small bubble of hysterical laughter rise in my throat. I pushed it down. "Right. So we're heading north. Any objections?"
The demon king stood and turned to face me fully. Water dripped from his chin onto his chest. "Objections? You ask if I have objections? Yes. I object to your existence. I object to this collar. I object to being led around by a fool who thinks she can choose any random direction and find success."
"North isn't random," I shot back, scrambling to my feet. My head was still a little fuzzy, but I managed to stay upright. "It's a cardinal direction. Very important in navigation."
He scowled, and before I could react, I found myself caught between a rock and a hard place.
An uncomfortably hard place. One very warm and very solid.
Arguably, one more solid than the rock.