Something had shifted in the air.
I sensed it immediately when Matthew entered, his gaze shadowed, a tautness in his jaw. I didn't need to inquire; Rebecca's presence had unsettled him, more than he would ever confess. It was evident in his stance, the way he carried himself, rigid, as if preparing for an unseen storm.
I remained by the window, gazing at the city below, attempting to quell the tempest within. What was happening to me?
What was going on with us?
I heard him shift, the quiet sound of his steps on the floor, and I knew he was right there. Too close. The distance between us was disappearing, and my heart raced. It wasn't fear, though. It was something else entirely.
Something far more intricate.
I turned, deliberately, our eyes locking, and the world around us faded. The air thickened with each inhalation, each one more electric. I was paralyzed, terrified of shattering the stillness. Yet, I couldn't look away.
Matthew advanced, bridging the gap, his eyes burning. It was as if he were hunting for something in my gaze, something elusive.
His mouth opened a fraction, like he was on the verge of speaking, but nothing emerged. He appeared to be wrestling with something, a silent conflict raging within.
"Esther," he managed, his voice barely above a whisper, strained.
My heart raced. "What is it?" I asked, my voice barely a breath.
His expression softened, a fleeting moment before the tempest returned. "I don't understand this," he confessed, his voice gravelly. "I don't know what's going on between us. I don't know if I can keep acting like I don't feel anything."
I stood still, his words settling over me like a heavy burden. He was opening up.
Matthew, the fortress of a man, was confessing something I never thought I'd hear.
I moved nearer, my hands betraying a slight tremor as I extended them toward him. "Matthew," I said, my voice thick with feeling. "You don't have to put on a show for me. You never have to."
He glanced down at my hands, now in his, his grip subtly tightening, as if he feared I'd vanish.
"I don't know how to let go," he murmured, almost to himself. "I don't know how to trust you, but I want to."
My breath hitched. I'd never seen him like this. So... vulnerable. So open. It stirred something within me, something I couldn't quite name, but it was there, deep, drawing me nearer.
"Then let me in," I said softly, my voice barely audible. "Let me help you. Let me show you that you can trust me."
His gaze met mine, and for the first time, I saw something. Something that wasn't shielded by defenses.
He gazed at me as if I were the center of his universe, and I felt it, a palpable thing. His hurt, his longing, his fragility_all the things he'd kept buried erupted in that instant.
"Esther..." His voice cracked, raw, and before I could respond, he was near, his hand cradling my face. His touch was soft, yet it held the gravity of everything we'd been battling.
I shut my eyes, absorbing the warmth of his hand, the roughness of his thumb against my skin.
My pulse quickened, and my breath hitched, mirroring the frantic pace of his.
Everything else faded away, leaving only us. No obligations. No barriers. Just him and me, at that moment.
And then, he kissed me.
It wasn't the gentle peck I anticipated. No, it was something else entirely. It was a kiss fueled by need, by a kind of desperation. His mouth was on mine, demanding, and his hands were pulling me nearer, as though he were trying to fuse us together. I was taken aback, a gasp escaping me, but the instant his lips met mine, my mind went blank.
It was just him—the feel of his lips, his hands, the warmth that enveloped us.
I returned the kiss, my fingers tracing over his chest, feeling the quick thud of his heart. The tension that had been simmering between us finally erupted, and I understood, in that moment, that everything had shifted.
Matthew broke the kiss, his breath uneven, and I saw the struggle in his eyes. He seemed to be battling himself, battling the feelings he'd kept hidden for so long.
"Esther," he murmured, his forehead resting against mine.
I was lost. I had no idea what this was, or where it was leading, but I couldn't bring myself to halt it. I didn't want to.
My hands remained on his chest, fingers gripping the material of his shirt, holding me there. "I don't want you to stop," I whispered, my voice trembling with the weight of it all. "I can't imagine being without you."
His gaze softened, and I half-expected him to speak, but then he withdrew. He stepped back, and the space between us expanded, a chasm. The heat of his hand remained, yet the chill of the air rushed in, occupying the void he'd created.
I blinked, struggling to regain my composure. My pulse was still hammering, but something stirred within me, something I couldn't quite define. A hope, a yearning, a wish to make this tangible.
Matthew's hand raked through his hair, his face a mask. "I can't," he rasped. "I'm not... I'm not who you think, Esther. I can't be what you want."
I just looked at him, struggling to understand. "What do you mean?" My voice wavered.
He shook his head, his features hardening. "I've spent my life shutting people out. I can't just let someone in, not like this. It's too much."
Too dangerous.
I moved closer, my heart racing with a blend of uncertainty and yearning. "I'm not leaving, Matthew. I'm here. I want to be here. I don't want to go."
His gaze flickered, as if he were finally recognizing me, really recognizing me. But then, just as swiftly, the barriers returned.
"I can't make any promises," he murmured, his voice almost lost in the air. "But I can't walk away, either."
The phone's shrill ring shattered the silence, a jarring interruption. Matthew's gaze snapped to the device, his features instantly hardening.
He picked it up, silent, his face a mask as he answered. The ensuing words were a blur, but his voice, frigid and detached, was unmistakable.
Then, the penthouse door swung open, and I heard the unmistakable sound of footsteps. A figure loomed in the entrance. Someone else had arrived.
I turned to Matthew, a wave of bewilderment crashing over me. He appeared unfazed but i was surprised.
Who was it? And what does that mean to us ?