My name is Takeshi Yamamoto, a boy who grew up with only his mother. My father, Hiroshi Yamamoto, was a worker forced to live far away from his family in a big city, leaving the two of us trapped in a waiting that never truly ended. From a young age, I learned that presence does not always mean being there.
When I finally grew old enough and ready to truly know my father, he died in a car accident, taking with him every chance for a meaningful conversation we would never have.
This story is about a child who is alive yet feels as if he has been dead from the very beginning—about how absence can kill the soul more deeply than death itself. It is a story of a mother who sacrifices everything, of a father caught between duty and desire, and of a child who learns to forgive when it is already too late.
Spanning five volumes with a total of 63 chapters, this novel follows Takeshi's journey from a childhood defined by waiting, through an anger-filled adolescence, into a disappointing early adulthood, past the devastating death of his father, and finally toward a painful understanding and acceptance—exploring identity, imperfect love, and the search for meaning amid suffering.