The sunlight hit Talia's face as she slowly opened her eyes. It was already 10:58 a.m. Late for most, but normal for her whenever there were no classes.
Even so, her mind was already racing ahead to tomorrow. The thought of facing familiar faces, sitting in my usual chair, listening to the teacher, taking notes, and waiting for test papers to be checked made my chest tighten. Some teachers might even announce the class grades and just thinking about it made her head spin and her heart sink.
"This isn't helping me…" Talia muttered to myself, collapsing back onto the bed. Her fingers curled into the sheets as worry clung to me like a shadow I couldn't shake.
She closed her eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath to gather whatever strength she had left. Then, slowly, she pushed herself up, determined or at least trying to face a new day.
Talia started her day with a late breakfast almost lunch eating quietly as her thoughts drifted elsewhere. Afterward, she busied herself with house chores, washing dishes and tidying up the room, letting the routine distract her from the worries lingering in her mind.
Once everything was done, she headed to the bathroom and took a long shower, hoping the warm water could wash away even a little of the fear she carried for tomorrow.
After getting dressed, she picked up her phone and stared at the screen, her thoughts drifting back to tomorrow.
No matter how much she tried to distract herself, the future refused to leave her mind.
"This is pointless, she sighed. I hope the school announces an additional break. I'm still not fully prepared to face reality."
Talia knew this month would be filled with stress and pressure. The honor list would soon be announced, report cards would be released, and expectations would rise higher than ever. What made it worse was knowing that her parents were already aware of it, already waiting, already hoping.
And she wasn't sure if she could live up to that hope.
"Reality sucks… I can't even enjoy my day just thinking about that stupid list."
Suddenly, a memory surfaced in my mind, It's my father's voice, calm and reassuring.
"Just make your academics fun," her father would say gently. "Don't pressure yourself too much. Your classmates aren't your competitors, focus on yourself. In the end, you're only competing with who you are becoming."
Talia rolled her eyes as she fixed her hair in front of the mirror.
"Such easy words to say."
"But who am I without academic validation? Would they still look at me the same way? Of course they wouldn't. People are full of judgment they can't help it. Insults slip easily from their mouths, comparisons follow, and every word they speak carries venom disguised as concern."
And somehow, Talia had learned to fear those words more than failure itself.
"And about my classmates? They wore fake smiles wherever they went. They would cheer for your success, clap the loudest, even congratulate you but deep down, they were already thinking of ways to bring you down. One wrong step, one failure, and they would stab you without you even realizing it."
That was how the world worked.
Or at least, that was how it felt to Talia.
As I scrolled through my DMs, a message from my group popped up, a photo of our score on the last performance task: 99/100.
That should have made me happy, right?
But instead of celebrating, I immediately started double-checking all my submissions.
Did I submit everything? Is everything complete?
I couldn't help it. Last time, my language teacher hadn't received the video presentation I sent before the deadline. Because of that, my report card looked incomplete, even though I had done the work.
I bit my lip, scrolling through my sent files again. I just hope this time my teacher sees everything… I don't want another mistake like last time.
I could already imagine my parents' reaction if they saw a card that looked "horrible."
Oh, please, no… I'm not claiming any negative energy, I whispered, trying to calm myself. But my chest was tight, and the fear gnawed at me anyway.
I closed my eyes and silently asked for guidance from above, hoping somehow it could lift this heavy feeling off my chest. I knew this anxiety wouldn't help me achieve anything yet it clung to me anyway.
"I can only hope… tomorrow turns out fine."
And for the first time in a long while, I wondered if I could ever stop letting fear control my tomorrow.