Hanging out with Clavin and Xavier felt… easy.
That surprised me.
We met after school at a small café near the bus stop—nothing fancy, just warm drinks and quiet music playing in the background. Clavin talked to the cashier like they were old friends, somehow convincing them to give us extra pastries.
"Charm," he said proudly, sliding into his seat. "You either have it or you don't."
Xavier raised an eyebrow. "You begged."
Clavin gasped. "Lies."
I laughed—actually laughed—and for a moment, I forgot about everything else.
We spent hours there. Talking about random things. School. Music. Future plans we pretended not to take seriously yet. Clavin filled the space with stories and jokes, while Xavier listened, adding a comment every now and then that somehow landed harder than Clavin's loud humor.
I started noticing things.
The way Xavier pushed my drink closer when I forgot about it.
The way he watched me when I spoke, like my words mattered.
The way he smiled—not often, but when he did, it felt earned.
At one point, Clavin leaned back in his chair. "Okay, I'm going to the restroom. Don't miss me too much."
The moment he left, the table went quiet.
Not uncomfortable. Just still.
"You seem… different lately," Xavier said.
"Different how?"
"Lighter," he replied. "More like yourself."
I looked down, fingers tracing the edge of my cup. "I think I'm finally okay."
He nodded. "I'm glad."
When our eyes met, my heart did something strange—small, but noticeable. Not overwhelming. Not scary.
Just warm.
Clavin returned, dropping back into his seat. "Did I miss anything?"
"Nope," I said too quickly.
Xavier looked away.
On the walk home, Clavin walked a few steps ahead, humming to himself. Xavier stayed beside me, our shoulders brushing occasionally.
I didn't pull away.
And that's when it hit me.
It wasn't love.
It wasn't even close.
But somewhere between laughter, silence, and quiet understanding…
I'd started to like him.
Just a little.
And for the first time, that feeling didn't hurt.
It felt like a beginning.