SM.
Those who don't know much about it think that in an SM relationship, the S—the sadist—holds the upper hand.
That the sadist calls the shots and uses it to control the masochist.
Just like in play, the relationship must be the same.
But that's not true.
It was the same with Cheongwol—the intensity of the play is decided by the masochist.
What can be done, what can't. And through setting a safeword, when to stop.
All the choices are given to the masochist.
The sadist, on the other hand, has to be careful not to hurt the masochist too badly and control their own desires.
They have to watch so the masochist's life doesn't go down the drain during play.
For example, one sadist spent days scouting a route for a naked walk, confirming no people were around before bringing their masochist there.
Without that special existence called a masochist... the sadist can't do anything either.
They cherish them so they don't run away, don't get dragged to prison, don't ruin their life.
So in jest, they even say SM play is the sadist serving the masochist.
...And that's already tough enough.
...But to keep doing this with Cheongwol, who might explode if I push the intensity too far?
".....Wh-why me?"
Why me?
****
".....Wh-why me?"
Cheongwol's body stiffened upright.
Her rigid gaze met Han Seojin's.
"..."
"..."
A long silence flowed.
His completely unexpected reaction left her speechless.
Why?
...No, there's no reason to, but...
Huh?
But...
...Maybe because she'd mulled over his words from that day dozens of times more?
Cheongwol could recall what he'd said to her as vividly as if it were yesterday.
When he first poured water over her body.
'You really... have such a pretty body.'
When she curled her legs to cover her private parts.
'...Your thighs are too pretty. So firm. Must be from all that diligent training.'
When he stood behind her.
'Your butt's like a peach.'
And... when their eyes met...
'...You look like a cheap whore, Cheongwol.'
The arrogant smile on Han Seojin's face was also vividly etched in her memory.
Back then, his face had been full of satisfaction.
A far cry from the man now stuttering in confusion.
And because she remembered him from that time.
Because he'd slowly savored her body with his eyes, she naturally thought he'd welcome this too.
When that misunderstanding shattered, Cheongwol's face flushed hot.
"You... don't you want to too...?"
She asserted without thinking.
"No...!?"
Han Seojin pulled back his body and asserted in return.
"Th-then why did you help me before?"
"Y-you suspected me of being an unorthodox martial artist, so I helped to show it wasn't a torture chamber...! And do you know how vicious that young lady's face was back then?"
"..."
Cheongwol couldn't keep still.
She clenched and unclenched her fists, her eyes and head darting wildly, her mouth opening and closing repeatedly.
"Ah... uh..."
Now, ironically, it was Cheongwol who came off as vulgar.
Pushing herself on him when he didn't want it... wasn't that just like a whore?
Realizing that brought back emotions similar to the shame she'd felt in the basement.
Her heart always pounded like this in front of Han Seojin.
In her panic, Cheongwol blurted out anything.
"Wh-what if... you still suspect I'm unorthodox right now...?"
Han Seojin let out an indignant scoff.
"No, what kind of—! After bawling your eyes out in my arms like that—"
-Smack!
Cheongwol clamped her hand over Han Seojin's mouth and shouted.
"—W-we agreed to forget that!"
His face twisted in an 'oh crap' expression as he froze.
Then, carefully prying off her hand from his mouth, he apologized.
"...Sorry. You're right, I forgot."
The two continued under the eaves, awkward breaths mingling.
Cheongwol thought of returning to the Emei Sect amid overflowing shame.
But Baekhui kept coming to mind, making her reluctant.
She could say it clearly.
Han Seojin mustn't misunderstand the order of things.
She hadn't come here craving perverse acts.
She hadn't come seeking humiliation and shame.
She just... like that day, wanted to somehow rid herself of this stifling feeling.
She wanted restful sleep.
She wanted to hold out among her senior brothers and sisters.
And for that, she could endure a bit of humiliation—so resolving this heart demon came first, not seeking humiliation first.
"...Hoo."
Cheongwol let out a deep sigh.
She calmed her raging emotions.
They needed to talk first.
She pushed open the shop door.
"Wh-where are you going!"
Cheongwol whispered.
"...Come in. We need to talk."
She forced her way inside.
As much as he humiliated her, she wanted a little revenge, so she ignored him.
****
Skill improvement's good.
Yeah, without that, a martial artist is just a corpse.
People swinging swords naturally want to swing them better.
Cheongwol's one of those obsessed with growth, so I get it.
...But why does it have to be SM of all things?
How is that helping you at all!
Why do I have to keep getting tangled with you!
That was supposed to be the end!
I'm going insane with frustration.
I was inside the small shop with Cheongwol.
She sat on my bed, and I sat on the floor.
Honestly, I was a bit pissed too.
Barging into someone's home uninvited and plopping down on the bed like she owns it.
"..."
"..."
Beyond the tension, maybe because I'd seen her so obedient in the basement.
A thought suddenly struck me.
...This girl who wants SM play.
...Sitting comfy while the sadist's on the floor? Why's the masochist on the bed and me, the sadist, on the floor.
Time to really lay down the law...
...As if that'd work.
"...Shopkeeper."
Cheongwol, shaking out her wet hair.
She's fucking gorgeous, damn it.
Is it because she's a main character in the novel... or is the world just unfair?
Long, big eyes. Straight nose. Seductive lips.
If she weren't crazy, I'd have welcomed play hundreds of times over.
...Sadly, she is crazy. And the kind who could kill me easily.
No choice but to back off.
Her tone more settled than before, she asked.
"...So, what's your reason for refusing?"
Because you're too scary.
But I couldn't say that.
"On the contrary, why should I accept?"
"..."
Cheongwol's expression hardened.
My feet tingling, I changed tack.
"Y-young lady, I... don't want to get involved with martial artists."
With a serious face, I half-circled the story.
"I'm an ordinary person. To me, martial artists are like tigers—terrifying. Getting more tangled with someone like you, the most promising young lady of the Emei Sect, is burdensome."
Especially with you—total disaster.
Cheongwol's eyes narrowed.
"...Don't want to get involved with martial artists?"
"Yes."
"...You seemed pretty chummy with the Beggars' Sect beggars though."
...No, seriously.
How does she even know that...?
She didn't even know my name until recently.
Is she spying on me?
That sparked my anger a bit too.
Not just my problem—the uncles were involved now.
"Aren't they martial artists too? One of the Nine Great Righteous Sects, right?"
"Th-they raised me, so I can't help it."
"The Emei Sect protected you too, didn't it? Ever think that without us, you might've been exploited by bandits or other unorthodox scum?"
"..."
Fuck...! Fuck...!!
Felt like I was being backed into a corner step by step.
No, seriously—if I start SM play with Cheongwol, isn't this like starting a gamble?
Life or death.
I'd be gambling continuously.
Too high intensity, and it's over—my head rolls.
I'd keep doing this crap till I lose all my earned money.
"Besides, if memory serves... Shopkeeper, you said this was your hobby. So isn't it good for both? I manage my heart demon... and you continue your hobby..."
I racked my brains furiously.
How to push her away?
It is my hobby...! Just not with you!
I got a bit honest.
"...Young lady, you keep... misunderstanding. It's heart demon treatment, sure... but it's not just that."
"Then?"
"Ramp up the intensity, and it becomes intimate acts between lovers."
-Twitch.
Cheongwol shuddered.
"...Lovers?"
"Th-think about it. Such vulgar acts—if you ramp up the intensity even more, doesn't it become that?"
"...Then just exclude that part."
"That's not the issue—the atmosphere is inherently that, isn't it? You wouldn't want that with me anyway!"
"..."
As if I wasn't wrong there, Cheongwol looked a bit flustered too.
But she didn't give up.
Her face and eyes were stubborn.
What the hell did the heart demon do to make her like this...
But originally, saying it helps heart demons was my lie anyway.
Help? With SM?
If it really helped, then Cheongwol's tendencies are...
"...Ha."
Seriously? Cheongwol a maso?
That's why her desperate pleas weren't landing.
Heart demon treatment my ass... wasn't it just sexual relief?
She keeps packaging it all lofty, but knowing the lewd truth made looking at her even more embarrassing.
No. Not the time for this.
I need to push her away first.
Suddenly, I recalled the day she first discovered the basement—the day I told her about outdoor urination, when she freaked and fled.
That cleared my head.
I took a deep breath.
Yeah, cockroach strategy it is.
Hit her with something that'll make her recoil.
Please run away again.
"Young lady. That day in the basement when we first... did SM."
"Es... EM? Play?"
"That's what it's called. Anyway, during that play, do you know I held back the intensity a lot?"
"..."
Cheongwol's cheeks flushed again.
Her trembling eyes couldn't meet mine anymore.
Good. Keep acting all girly like that.
"Normally, it's way more vulgar and perverted. You keep asking me without knowing, so I'm at a loss. As I said, higher intensity is for lovers' intimate acts—can you handle that, young lady?"
"...L-like that day... you control the intensity. M-maybe even lower than before."
"What's that? I'm the doctor, and the patient's telling me how to perform the procedure?"
"..."
Steeling myself, I asked.
"If I tell you to be my little dog, could you—"
-Slap!!
When I came to, my face had whipped to the right.
"..."
I slowly turned to Cheongwol.
She covered her mouth with her hand, fidgeting anxiously.
"N-no... I didn't mean to..."
"..."
Cockroach strategy over.
Two more hits and I'm out.
"...Anyway, last time was just a taste. The real intensity isn't for an Emei Sect nun like you. Stop this and go back. Let's call it a day's deviation and confirmation I'm not unorthodox."
****
"...Anyway, last time was just a taste. The real intensity isn't for an Emei Sect nun like you. Stop this and go back. Let's call it a day's deviation and confirmation I'm not unorthodox."
Cheongwol swallowed dryly without thinking.
That was just a taste?
Hard to believe she could feel more shame than that... but his casually tossed words lent credibility.
Outdoor urination, becoming a dog...
So vulgar it made her dizzy.
Could a human even do that?
Unbidden, her imagination ran wild.
And with it, her body grew faintly hot.
Revulsion quickened her breath... yet curiosity held her fast.
What happens if she breaks more here?
What would the Sect Leader think?
...What does it feel like to shatter worldly expectations?
"...Young lady?"
"Ah...!"
Cheongwol startled more than needed, her body jerking.
She understood his words.
That she shouldn't, that there's no reason to.
...However...
"..."
Anyone else, maybe.
But with Han Seojin, she'd already shown her wet body, bawled in his arms.
Even her true self slaughtering bandits was exposed... so showing more to him—didn't make much difference?
No one else knew so many sides of her.
Not even the Sect Leader.
...And behind greater shame... surely greater praise follows.
'...Well done, Cheongwol.'
"...Eut."
'...You worked hard. So pretty.'
Cheongwol glanced at Han Seojin.
He had no idea what wild horse was in her head now.
Even this felt strange.
Imagining intimate moments with him, right in front of him.
Imagining praise from this pathetic man.
Was she going mad? She couldn't tell.
Still, rejecting the feeling right now was hard.
If she knew nothing, fine... but now that she did, a faint craving arose.
The thought of 'shouldn't' made her body tingle.
And that made her want it more.
Want to shatter stifling precepts more.
After that, she slept well for days, her mind calmer.
...Plus, daily life had grown boring.
There are limits. Too much is truly repulsive.
But couldn't Han Seojin control it well enough?
His warm reassurance that day was vivid too.
She knew his demeanor would shift once play started, even if he talked tough now.
"Go on back, young lady."
Cheongwol squeezed her eyes shut, then opened them.
She steeled her heart one last time.
She'd endure shame downstairs anyway—might as well look a bit more shameful here.
"...Shopkeeper."
Embracing the shame to the end, Cheongwol said.
"...Help me, and I won't forget this."
"..."
"...Just once... can't you?"
****
"...Just once... can't you?"
She probably has no idea how high I could ramp the intensity.
Last time not being bad doesn't mean everything's fine...!
I toned it down a lot!
...But.
His earlier words stabbed my chest.
Help her, and she won't forget.
At that, I halted my all-out refusal and blinked.
Sure, in the future she'll become not the Emei Sect's Thousand-Year Flower or the righteous faction's beacon, but the Life-Pursuing Ghost Cheongwol...
...The Life-Pursuing Ghost Cheongwol forgetting this debt? Still good for me.
Racking up debt with one of the Demonic Cult's Seven Heavens.
Stack enough, and maybe a directive comes down from the whole Demonic Cult.
Spare Han Seojin.
She's becoming one of the Demonic Cult's Seven Heavens. That'd be a laughable order.
"..."
No matter how I thought, beyond wanting distance, stacking favors wasn't bad.
Especially in this situation where things had gone too far to cleanly separate.
We were already tangled—coldly shoving her away to earn resentment seemed dumber.
Her showing up like this reinforced it, and her knowing I'm close with the Beggars' Sect uncles even more.
Maybe I'd properly caught the Life-Pursuing Ghost's eye.
Suddenly, I recalled her bawling in the basement.
Her exposing her wet body to me.
...Well, thinking I could cut ties cleanly after seeing that was my greed.
"...Haa..."
-Scritch scritch scritch!
I roughly scratched my head in front of Cheongwol.
My worries tousled it wildly.
"...Shopkeeper..."
Cheongwol whispered my name.
I had to squeeze my eyes shut. That face could kill.
After agonizing seated for ages, I told Cheongwol.
"...There are rules."
"..."
"One... no one knows about our relationship. It stays secret. I told you—I don't want ties to the martial world."
"...I don't want to tell anyone either. Huh...? But the other day at the inn, you wanted a kis—"
"—Two. Dropping by unannounced like this really bothers me. To keep our relationship hidden, no visits for at least ten days without agreement."
"...That's no big deal. I-I don't want to either? It's just... the heart demon forces me..."
"Three. You never forget this debt. Got it?"
Even if you become the Life-Pursuing Ghost.
"I won't forget."
"And young lady, break these promises, and I never help you again."
The third was meaningless, but the first two I meant.
Break them, and I walk—no complaints.
"..."
Cheongwol froze at that.
But soon, she nodded.
"...Got it."
With rules set, awkward silence settled between us.
We both knew what came after agreement.
Even my heart raced a bit.
I'm a sadist, after all.
Thinking of humiliating this Cheongwol who'd been bossy made my pulse quicken.
Damn, real...
...No. Not that kind of excitement.
...Thinking now, maybe my pulse raced from fear of Cheongwol.
Cheongwol was rigid too.
We kept stealing glances.
...Like before asking 'wanna shower first?' but horror version.
Her breathing grew subtly quick.
"...S-so?"
SM is all about atmosphere.
Sadist must be dominant.
Can't let masochist lead.
Like that day, I gathered courage.
Once decided, do it right.
If she felt something then, it was from classic SM.
Had to be dominant like that day.
Replay the act.
"...Shopkeeper, so what for today—"
"—Cheongwol."
At my call, Cheongwol's body went rigid.
Only her chest rose and fell noticeably.
"...Didn't say you could ask questions, did I? Right?"
Not fully submitting, Cheongwol muttered.
"...What's the big deal about asking..."
"Go downstairs."
I said, standing.
Cheongwol lowered her gaze.
Her fingers fidgeted.
The pouring rain outside seemed to amplify only our sounds.
I sighed inwardly too.
...Can't stop now.
Maybe from the moment I suspected her masochist, it was unstoppable.
Still, just a bit higher intensity this time.
I don't wanna do this every time either.
Cockroach strategy again.
See if she comes back after.
With rules made, best outcome is this.
Today last.
Perfect. She won't forget the debt per rules, and I don't cross lines anymore.
...Yeah, right.
Felt like there might be more in future.
So ramp intensity.
Make her too shocked to return.
She said it herself, so no complaints if I push.
...But not overboard. My neck's at risk.
Still, something an Emei disciple never imagined.
"...What're you doing? Not listening? I said downstairs."
I told the frozen Cheongwol again.
Cheongwol's eyes darted, then she awkwardly stood.
Self-conscious about entering the basement alone, she gulped, crouched to open the door, then defiantly said.
"...Atmosphere-building's not that scary."
Yet she went down.
I racked my brains for what play.
****
Beggars' Sect Emei branch leader Gwak Du thought amid the downpour.
Looking at the beggars sheltering rain beside him, he said.
"Kids, this won't do. Let's go see Seojin after ages. Shelter from rain too."
"Won't Seojin hate it?"
"Why should we care? Worst case, bring food or something."
Gwak Du smiled at the thought of seeing Han Seojin.
"...This punk knows we're getting soaked but won't invite us to the inn."