About a year—that's how long the preparations for Revenge took overall. I didn't feel like going the crude route: grab Koharu with overwhelming force, drag her down into my basement, pump her full of a poison like the one they used on me, and enjoy her suffering. That would've been boring. And it's not like we were enemies in the full sense. We weren't actually trying to kill each other or torment one another just out of spite. It was just a game… but that didn't mean you shouldn't take it seriously. So… my actual plan was similar to the one I described above, but the nuances were very different.
Most likely, she expected me to hurt her physically. She carefully checked everywhere she stayed or moved through for any trace of poison and was ready for ambushes. How do I know? I'll get to that later. As for her motives, they definitely weren't baseless—after all, I'd tried to set up ambushes for her clones more than once before I finally calmed down and started thinking about a slightly different way to get to her.
Elder Koharu has a certain reputation, and a big part of it rests on her stealth and how she uses it. It's not just Root that does espionage; some of the Hokage's ANBU do it too, plus a kind of personal—but not entirely—ANBU under Utatane's direct command. You could say Konoha has at least three spy services, which isn't that surprising for what is literally a village of spies. Okay, "service" is a bit loud, considering each one probably doesn't have that many people in it. A few squads here, a few more there—that's what I figure from the patterns and facts I've picked up in this world, and that's most likely how it is.
Destroying that reputation would hurt. A lot. On the scale of the whole village, it could lead to major, irreversible consequences. So I wasn't planning to go big. But on a smaller, more personal scale? Oh, absolutely.
Wanting to ruin the old hag on her own turf, I methodically and carefully sent shadow clones to shadow Koharu. Their chakra signatures were altered and muted, and they were filthy—smeared in a special clay with minerals mixed in so that even a Hyūga wouldn't be able to recognize them if it came to that. For months, from as far away as possible, they learned the routes of Koharu, her subordinates, and her subordinates' subordinates. They used the skills she herself had taught me, plus everything I knew about that old mare—her habits, what she paid the most attention to—and also tried out some new tricks to reduce the chance of detection even further. The shadow clones were as careful as possible; there was no point in rushing. So only after several months of prep did the spying start to bear its first fruit.
That's why I knew exactly what Koharu was expecting from me and what she was up to.
I used a lot of fuin. A lot. Placed in key spots, they picked up sound vibrations and recorded, for later analysis, Koharu's orders to her subordinates and the orders given by the top people among those subordinates. Without using chakra—so as not to trip any sensors—tunnels were dug under the meeting and rest areas of shinobi under Utatane's command, as well as under the elder's own house and workplaces.
A few more months gave me even more. On top of the fact the clones kept finding more and more ways to get intel, they documented everything about Koharu's own plans, secret ANBU operations, every mission they managed to learn about, and weaknesses in various security systems—things she was supposed to keep under wraps or keep under control. Over the months, all of that was compiled into several scrolls, which I then memorized and kept only in my head—to minimize the risk of anything leaking and to avoid putting Konoha in danger.
When day X finally came, I created a clone with more than half my chakra and handed it a copy of the encrypted scroll of kompromat, sealed in one of my special bracers with a storage seal that could be triggered to self-destruct its contents.
I myself headed toward the Hokage Residence. I needed to hang around there, as a safe spot, and keep my main clone under control so it wouldn't dispel because of some unforeseen crap. Or, on the contrary, so it would dispel—but only after making damn sure it destroyed whatever was in that storage bracer.
That same shadow clone's POV
The streets of Konoha were warm, but not too hot. A pleasant breeze brushed against my skin, and the birdsong seemed especially nice today.
Practically dancing along to the little tune that had started playing in my head, I walked toward Koharu's workplace.
Entering the strictly furnished building, I moonwalked straight up to the door the elder was behind.
Sliding the door open without a sound, I immediately met Koharu's narrow eyes, absolutely overflowing with suspicion.
Her subordinates had definitely reported my arrival, and of course they hadn't forgotten to mention what mood I was in.
Besides her, there was an ANBU on duty in the corner, and a few more outside the room.
When I came in and sat at the small table across from the old hag, she asked in a "friendly" tone:
"What the hell are you doing here, you insolent brat?"
"You know, today is just one hell of a good day."
Judging by how her face wrinkled up even more, she disagreed.
"Ahem," I coughed, then lazily waved a hand to tell the ANBU on duty to leave. "Don't bother us."
He only listened when the old woman repeated the gesture.
Koharu's face got even darker, with a layer of seriousness on top.
"Don't waste my time. I have a ton of work to do, unlike some people," she said, starting to lose her temper.
In response to her attempt to rush me, I just burst out laughing, loud and long, which pissed her off even more.
Right when it looked like she was about to blow and probably chuck something heavy at me, I stopped dead.
My hand went to the bracer. A pulse of chakra, and a thick book appeared, landing on the table with a loud thump at my gesture.
For a moment, the old hag glanced at the new object, then shifted her gaze to my face, which had gone dark and serious under the shadow that had fallen over it.
"The hour of reckoning has struck. Read."
Dialing the tension down a notch, Koharu reached for the book, opened it, and started checking the sections.
Her eyes immediately landed on a list of codenamed missions she herself was in charge of, sorted by date.
"This…" She stared at me in shock. "You were never supposed to have this information."
Without saying anything else, her gaze jumped to the section listing eleven weaknesses found in the ANBU structure: how information is passed inside the organization and her personal screwups in organizing all the mission processes.
"I'm not in a hurry. Take your time," I said as the elder raised her head, and she immediately dove back into reading.
Over the next ten minutes, her expression cycled from stunned, to frowning, to upset, and finally to pure despair.
"Maybe this isn't all your classified info. Some of your safety measures, I admit, are very good," I began. "Even after a long time, I couldn't get around some of them. And there's probably stuff I couldn't even find a trace of, right?"
The old woman tore her eyes away from the book and stared at me, her lips pressed into a line.
"But even what is here? It's not 'a little'. No. It's a fuckton."
"What do you want?" Koharu asked dryly, and immediately clarified, "For this information to stay right here."
Yeah, of course she figured out I wanted to leak this data. Most likely, only to trusted people—some important jōnin, the other elder, Mitokado Homura, and a hundred percent the Hokage. That would be a brutal blow to her reputation. All those weaknesses in her structure—she was the one who should've foreseen them, prevented them. She's the expert in this field, after all.
Maybe they'd strip her of her authority. Maybe not. Either way, Koharu wouldn't be able to look the people she'd worked with for decades in the eye. Her whole path as a shinobi would be disgraced.
Honestly, it still wasn't the absolute worst. Bad, sure. But Koharu is sharp and pretty inventive. She'd probably already imagined an even worse outcome for herself than anything I could've come up with.
"I'll warn you right away: I'm a shadow clone. The original has all this information stored in his head," I said first, cutting off any bright ideas she might have. Like grabbing me to try and convince me this stuff should only go to her and never, ever be told to anyone else. In response, I just heard a snort.
"And he's most likely hanging around the Hokage Residence," Koharu said, keeping a surprisingly straight face. "So that, if anything happens, he can hand me over immediately and without any trouble."
My smug grin only confirmed her guess.
"And I also know you took every precaution to make sure this"—she lifted the book—"doesn't end up where it shouldn't. We've studied each other well, Uzumaki."
"Exactly. But you know, I'm not without a sense of gratitude. Love for my fellow man. Understanding. We've been through a lot together," I finally started getting to the point. "So I'm offering you two options. First: I tell all this to the Hokage, and only him. You lose all authority only in his eyes…"
"…in the eyes of a man I'll be forced to see very often," Koharu noted reasonably.
"Yeeah…" I drawled, even more pleased.
If the info stayed between just the three of us, things would play out exactly the way she'd just said. Hiruzen would be very unlikely to fire her. She did her job, if not perfectly, then well enough. But for her it'd still turn into an eternal, almost daily shame.
"Second option." From my second bracer I unsealed an hourglass and a syringe filled with dark liquid. Koharu's eyes flashed in recognition. A shadow fell over my face again, making my grin look even nastier. "One thousand five hundred and eleven seconds. I counted every single goddamn second of agony in that month. You're going to inject this yourself and endure it, fully conscious, until the sand runs out. Otherwise, we'll stretch this out into as many sessions as it takes."
I unloaded the items onto the table.
Koharu hesitated, but still reached for the poison.
"Hear that sound, Uzumaki? That's the First Hokage rolling in his grave over all your 'love' and 'understanding'," she said, then, in one sharp motion, drove the needle into herself.
Immediately, clenching her jaw, Koharu toppled back and curled up on the floor. Veins bulged across her forehead from the pain.
Slowly flipping the hourglass, I settled in comfortably to wait.
Soon the old hag's mouth opened and she started breathing hard—ragged, but deep.
It wasn't exactly a pleasant sight. But it did bring a solid dose of satisfaction.
And so, to the sound of Koharu's harsh breathing, her allotted seconds dragged by.
She'd positioned herself so she could see the hourglass. And when the last grains of sand fell, she simply blacked out.
"Hm. Respectable," I admitted, standing up. "Let's see what we've got here…"
I bent over her body to check her condition.
Alive. Teeth cracked to hell from the strain. I couldn't see it myself, but I knew for a fact her central nervous system was fucking… shocked by that kind of stress and only held the body conscious thanks to sheer iron will.
Forming a few hand seals, I started spewing a stream of water from my mouth. The liquid didn't fall—it gathered into an amorphous mass in my hands.
Over the past year, I'd managed to pick up Wind and Water Release—not at a very high level, especially if you compared me to Hiruzen, but still.
"This won't hurt either…" From my leg, a web of fuin started spreading out around Koharu, helping me treat her.
Once I'd built up enough water, I wrapped Koharu's whole body in it. The water seeped into her and began drawing the poison out.
A few minutes later, the same old hag was still lying there soaked, and in my left hand was a ball of water with all the poison inside.
Walking over to the side of the room, I dug out the only bit of luxury in this otherwise ascetic place—a small teapot and a few cups. I poured the poisoned water into the teapot.
"A souvenir," I said, setting the teapot on the table, then left the room.
I had other things to do. I always do.
On that note, Revenge could be considered complete.
I took the book. I'll hand it back when she wakes up. And after something like this, Koharu won't be waking up for a couple of days.
For now, I'll go tell the ANBU to haul her off to the hospital.
Some time later. Utatane Koharu
The Konoha elder came to on a hospital bed in her home village. She recognized the white room right away.
Her whole body ached with that nasty, all-over pain. Recent memories slammed into her skull along with the headache.
"The pain will pass soon… My reputation, though, would've been lost forever," Utatane reminded herself, justifying her decision.
For a few minutes, her face twisted as she remembered a certain blond-haired boy. The "old woman" felt real irritation and humiliation at having been "taught a lesson" like that by a literal child.
"Well… that was seriously done," she couldn't help but admit. The feelings were quickly smothered by pragmatism.
Now the image of the infuriating, way-too-brazen-for-his-size brat—whom Koharu had already respected a little for his effort in realizing his potential and his quick grasp of her teachings—jumped up a solid few points.
"And I suppose I won't be planning any revenge of my own…" Utatane decided sensibly. She understood she wasn't getting any younger, while the sometimes-to-the-point-of-pain irritating Uzumaki, on the contrary, was getting stronger every year. She wasn't afraid, but she understood perfectly well that that was it. She wouldn't keep up. This… insubordinate youth had surpassed her. At least in most professional aspects.
Koharu also wasn't worried he'd pull something as stupid as leaving that book lying on her desk for some subordinate to read. If he had made such a dumb mistake, she would've pulled together every scrap of power she had, found him, and with a whole crowd taught him a lesson even harsher than anything she'd done before. As it was, Utatane knew Uzumaki would keep his word.
When the woman was discharged, she would, of course, get that little book. Then, with all the diligence she had, she'd go over everything: ANBU, her subordinates, the whole organization. She'd do everything she could to close all the weaknesses Uzumaki had found, and she'd try to find new ones. All that would happen a bit later, after her "suddenly initiated inspections." She'd shut down the most critical gaps immediately, but the little stuff could wait.
No need to rush that part. The vulnerabilities Uzumaki had been able to identify were due to a number of solid reasons. They didn't mean that if enemy spies came here, they'd just as easily find everything he did. Her student, first of all, had skills that very, very few spies possess; second, he knew Konoha's shinobi and her personally very well; third, he had huge freedom of movement through the village and, accordingly, better conditions for deeper reconnaissance; and fourth, he had even more options thanks to his unique abilities—like a ridiculous amount of chakra and those shadow clones of his, which, in such large numbers and on a constant basis, probably only the blond could make.
Koharu's workload had definitely gone up, and her problems hadn't shrunk. The Uchiha… a headache. But you could live with that too.
Uzumaki Naruto's POV
When the old hag recovered, I handed her the honestly earned little book, got a thank-you for the tea, and went back to my usual rhythm of life.
Hiruzen grumbled something along the lines of why, after I get involved, an elder had to be dragged to the hospital with nervous shock. I blamed it on our personal relationship and asked him not to interfere and let me sort it out myself. Later, when Koharu had fully recovered, she asked Hiruzen to do exactly what I'd asked for too. The old man respected our personal boundaries and didn't bring it up again.
Koharu, by the way, seemed to really appreciate how carefully I'd looked after her little book. After that, she started treating me with a lot more respect.
Still, in the grand scheme of things, not that much changed.
Training went on.
Life flowed along at its own pace. Month after month.
Just like in the story I knew, the Uchiha massacre happened. It didn't stir much in me. I was focused on my own stuff, especially medicine.
Only occasionally, to blow off some steam and change the scenery, I'd drop by the Academy.
On one of those "visits," I got the chance to show off my basic grasp of psychology.
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