Chapter Eight: The Luna Who Refused to Kneel
Derek's POV
I did it on Tuesday.
My hand didn't shake as I poured the last drop of wolfsbane into the water. The glass vial was cold and heavy, as if it were judging me. I didn't want to kill her. I just wanted to break her—enough that she would finally give in. Enough to make her sever the bond. Enough to set me free.
But when I went back for her… Rowena was gone.
At first, I told myself we'd simply missed each other. Then the scent hit me. Blood. Pain. And beneath it all, the bitter tang of wolfsbane—stronger than it should have been.
My feet carried me to the crypt before my mind caught up.
I don't know what I expected. Maybe to find her there. Still lying on the stone, weak, furious, but alive. Maybe she'd look at me with those eyes that always held defiance… and something more.
When I saw the crypt door standing open, my breath stopped.
I stepped inside.
That's when it truly hit me.
Rowena wasn't there.
Dried blood streaked the walls. Dark stains marred the marble, as if a body had been dragged away. Her scent lingered everywhere—fresh, wild, saturated with pain. But she herself was gone.
The vial slipped from my fingers.
I watched it fall in sickening slow motion, shattering against the dusty stone. Glass scattered, the potion spilled, and the entire chamber filled with that unmistakable, revolting smell.
"Derek?"
I flinched at the sound of her voice.
I turned. My sister stood in the doorway, a bouquet of flowers in her hands. Surprise flickered across her face, then sharpened as her gaze took in me… and the broken glass.
"What are you doing here?" she asked.
"I brought water for the flowers," I replied too quickly, knowing instantly how wrong it sounded.
"And you?" I added.
"I brought flowers for the ancestors," she said, gesturing to the bouquet. "Though it looks like you brought more than water."
Her eyes skimmed the stains, the blood, the shattered vial. She didn't ask questions. Maybe she didn't want the answers.
"Must've been a squatter," she said coolly. "Send someone to clean this up before Mother and Father return."
She walked past me.
When I was alone again, the silence crashed down. Rowena's blood was everywhere. Her scent. Her absence.
I slammed my fist into the wall.
"DON, YOU WORTHLESS DAMN MUTT!" I roared. "GET OUT HERE. NOW."
For a moment, there was nothing.
Then, finally—
"What do you want, Derek?" Don asked, bored. Then his tone shifted. "What the—this smell… blood and wolfsbane? Derek, what did you do?"
"Relax," I hissed. "I tried to force her to reject me. She didn't. Now we have to find her."
As I spoke, I felt Don rifling through my memories. I didn't stop him. I didn't have the strength.
"You idiot!" he exploded. "Have you completely lost your mind? You did this to my mate?!"
"Spare me the drama," I snapped. "We need to find her. Before it's too late."
A pause.
"I'll help," he said at last. "But don't think you're getting away without consequences."
He surfaced, took control. Inch by inch, he searched the crypt—sniffing, listening—but found nothing. Rowena was gone. As if the earth itself had swallowed her. He tracked the forest to the border, but found no wolf prints. In human form, she couldn't have vanished like this.
The packhouse corridors felt unnaturally quiet. Guards lowered their eyes as I passed. They could smell it on me—blood and guilt. An Alpha is never truly invisible.
Orlando waited in the council chamber. He didn't sit. His arms were crossed, shoulders tight, jaw clenched as I entered.
"How much longer do you plan to disappear like this?" he demanded without preamble. "The pack isn't blind, Derek. You haven't slept here for weeks. You sneak out. And when you return… you look like you're carrying a war inside you."
I closed the door. The click of the lock sounded too loud.
"It's not everyone's concern," I said quietly.
"It is mine," he shot back. "I'm your second-in-command. If something happens to the Alpha, the whole pack feels it."
I met his gaze. There was no accusation in his eyes—only concern. That hurt more.
I stepped closer and opened the bond.
No one can hear this.
Orlando stiffened. His back straightened as if struck, his eyes clouding for a heartbeat as my memories and emotions bled into him.
"There's someone," I began. "A woman. My Luna."
I watched his breath catch.
"Your Luna…?" he whispered, then bit the word off. His hand clenched. "Derek, that's—this is enormous."
"She's… different," I continued. "Stronger than anyone we've known. I couldn't control it. I was afraid of her."
Orlando went pale.
"I tortured her. Locked her away. Tried to force her to reject me. I was going to give her wolfsbane."
His reaction was immediate. His eyes widened, and he stepped back as if physically struck.
"You—have you lost your mind?" he breathed. "Your Luna?"
"I didn't want to kill her," I snapped. "I just wanted to break her. Make her reject me. Be free."
Orlando turned away, dragged a hand down his face. He was silent for a long moment. When he spoke again, his voice was hoarse.
"Do you realize what this means? If the pack ever finds out—"
"They won't," I cut in.
He turned back, anger and loyalty warring in his eyes.
"And now?" he asked. "Where is she?"
"Gone."
The word fell heavily between us.
"Dead?" he asked softly.
"There's no proof," I said. "Her blood was there. Her scent. But not her body."
Orlando nodded slowly, thinking. I felt his wolf stir—careful, calculating.
"Then she's alive," he said firmly. "If she were dead, you'd feel it. The bond would have snapped. It hasn't, has it?"
I didn't answer. I didn't need to.
"That woman," he continued, "isn't ordinary. If she didn't break, her wolf is ancient. Power like that barely appears even in the chronicles."
"I came to the same conclusion," I admitted.
Orlando stepped closer, his voice hardening.
"You want an oath from me?"
"Silence."
"I swear," he said without hesitation. "But know this, Derek—if she returns, she may not forgive you. And if she doesn't… you won't just lose her."
"I know," I said quietly.
He studied me for a moment, then nodded.
"Then we'll search. Quietly. Without the pack."
"No," I said sharply. "No one else can know. Not yet."
Orlando pressed his lips together.
"Then you'll carry this hell alone, Alpha," he said. "But I won't abandon you."
It was the only thing holding me together.
Night brought no relief.
Darkness wasn't shelter—it was a mirror.
The walls of my room felt too close. The air was thick, suffocating, as if the crypt's cold had followed me home. With every breath, Rowena's absence pulsed inside my chest. Not the memory—worse. The empty tension where the bond should have settled… and didn't.
An Alpha always feels it when he loses his Luna.
I felt nothing.
That was the worst part.
No scream in the bond. No tearing snap. Just a dull, stubborn presence. As if she were watching from afar. As if she were still alive. And maybe… hating me.
I would deserve that.
I sat on the edge of the bed and, for the first time, allowed myself to stop commanding, stop strategizing, stop being Alpha. Just a man. Just someone who had destroyed everything.
I buried my face in my hands.
My wolf stirred restlessly beneath my skin, but he wasn't angry now. He was confused. Uncertain. As if even he didn't understand how we'd ended up here.
You should have protected her, a voice whispered inside me—neither entirely Don's nor entirely mine.
Not broken her.
I looked up. Moonlight spilled through the window, drawing a cold silver line across the floor. The same moon shone on her somewhere out there. Alone. Wounded. Free… or running.
I couldn't decide which thought hurt more.
As Alpha, I'd always believed strength lay in control. In breaking what was dangerous. In chaining what we didn't understand.
Rowena wasn't dangerous.
She was the truth I couldn't bear to face.
The pack slept, unaware.
The guards patrolled.
Order looked perfect.
Only their Alpha was falling apart in silence.
I swore I would find her.
Not to cage her again.
But to face her.
Because if she returns…
she may not come for mercy.
She may come for judgment.
And perhaps that will be the only judgment I truly deserve.
---
Bonus Scene — Don
I withdrew.
Not all at once, but slowly—like someone growing tired of slamming into walls. Derek was a childish Alpha. He raged, commanded, exploded—but never listened. My words bounced off him like he was deaf.
I was done.
I needed distance. From everything. From him. From the endless war inside his mind.
I hoped that finding his Luna would change him. That he'd finally calm. That I could finally rest.
When I came back…
The world shattered.
The scent of blood. The bitterness of wolfsbane. Rowena's pain—crashing into me all at once. And then I understood.
If I hadn't withdrawn, if I'd stayed… it wouldn't have happened.
Guilt tore into me deeper than any blade. I was left alone with the truth: while I sought peace, my Luna suffered.
And this burden…
I will carry it for the rest of my existence.