The dust hadn't even settled in the hidden chamber of the Grotto when the silence was broken by a sound I didn't expect: the rhythmic tapping of a stylus on glass.
I was currently sitting on the carcass of a Rank-B Chimera, which was awkward because a) I was an E-Rank porter, and b) I was currently trying to figure out if I could "fuse" the Chimera's left-over venom with my canteen of lukewarm coffee.
"Don't move," a voice commanded. It wasn't the booming roar of a monster or the panicked shout of Jin-Woo. It was cold, precise, and sounded like a librarian who had just found someone eating Cheetos over a first-edition manuscript.
I froze, a glob of Chimera-poison-coffee halfway to my lips. "Uh, hello? I'm Han-Gul. I'm the guy who usually carries the bags, but I think I might have accidentally won?"
Out of the settling dust emerged a girl who looked like she had wandered into the wrong movie. While I was covered in monster blood and soot, she wore a crisp, midnight-blue tactical suit under a lab coat that didn't have a single wrinkle. Her hair was a sharp, asymmetrical bob, and her glasses caught the faint glow of the dungeon's mana-veins.
This was Seo-Yoon. Even a "dumb" guy like me knew who she was. She was the Hunter Association's youngest Chief Analyst—a girl so smart people joked her brain was actually a quantum computer the government had hidden in a human body.
She didn't look at me. She looked at the dead Chimera. Then she looked at the shattered granite wall. Then she looked at her holographic tablet, her fingers moving in a blur.
"Impossible," she muttered. "The mana displacement in this room suggests a localized explosion equivalent to a Rank-A Kinetic blast, yet there is no residue of explosive mana. There is only... movement. And you."
She finally looked at me. Her eyes narrowed behind her frames. "Han-Gul. Age 19. Awakened six months ago. Rank E. Ability: [Basic Catalog]. You are currently sitting on a B-Rank Chimera that was supposed to be the 'Hidden Guardian' of this sector. Explain the physics of its death. Specifically, why does its skull look like it was hit by a supersonic freight train?"
"Well, you see," I said, scratching the back of my head and giving her my best 'I'm-just-as-confused-as-you-are' smile. "I fell. And when I fell, I got really fast. And then I hit things. But I hit them with my tough face, not my soft face."
Seo-Yoon stared at me for a long, painful ten seconds. "You're an idiot."
"I get that a lot!" I chirped.
"No," she stepped closer, her tablet projecting a grid over my body. "You are an idiot who is currently emitting a frequency of mana that shouldn't exist. Your [Basic Catalog] skill is flickering. It's... evolving? No, it's rewriting itself."
Before I could respond, the ceiling above us groaned. A silver streak came crashing down—my best friend, Jin-Woo, landing with the grace of a cat and the intensity of a thunderstorm. His spear was already leveled at Seo-Yoon before he even realized who she was.
"Gul! Get away from—!" Jin-Woo stopped, his eyes widening as he saw the dead Chimera, then me, then the famous Analyst. "Wait. You're alive? And... is that the 'Ice Queen' from the Association?"
"She's not that icy, Jin-Woo! She has a very nice tablet!" I said, waving.
Jin-Woo ignored me, his "Genius" instincts kicking in. He looked at the Chimera's shattered teeth. He looked at my uninjured body. As someone who had practiced the spear for ten hours a day since he was six, he understood power. And he knew that the Han-Gul who had entered this dungeon wasn't the one standing in front of him.
"Gul," Jin-Woo said, his voice dropping to a whisper. "What did you do?"
"I just... mixed some things," I said, my heart starting to race. The System window was still hovering in my peripheral vision, blinking urgently.
[Warning: External Analysis Detected.] [The 'Synthesis Architect' must remain hidden to ensure growth.] [New Quest: Misdirection.] Objective: Convince the Analyst that your power is a 'One-Time Consumable Item'. Reward: [Hidden Pocket] Skill.
I looked at Seo-Yoon, who was currently analyzing the broken Skill Books on the floor. She was too smart. If I told her I could fuse skills, she'd have me in a lab by dinner time.
"It was a scroll!" I shouted, a bit too loudly. "A gold one! I found it in the trash! It said 'One-Time Use: Big Hit'! I used it because I didn't want to get eaten! Now it's gone! Poof!"
Jin-Woo looked at me like I was the worst liar in human history. Seo-Yoon, however, paused.
"A gold-tier consumable in an E-Rank dungeon?" she asked, her eyes searching mine. "The probability of such a drop is 0.00004%. However... given your record of extreme luck and extreme stupidity, it is the only logical explanation for why a Rank-E is still breathing."
She turned off her tablet. "However, the Association will be taking you in for a full debriefing. I don't believe in 'luck,' Han-Gul. I believe in variables."
I sighed in relief, but then I saw it. Underneath her calm exterior, Seo-Yoon was trembling slightly. Not from fear, but from excitement. She knew I was lying. And she wanted to see exactly how much.
Suddenly, the System chirped again.
[Synthesis Opportunity Detected!] [Target: Seo-Yoon's 'Analytical Eye' (Observation) + Jin-Woo's 'Spear Intent' (Precision)] [Warning: Attempting to fuse 'Human Talents' is strictly forbidden at your current level.]
My eyes went wide. I could fuse them? No, not them—their talents. If I could take the brain of the smartest girl in Korea and the hands of the best spearman in the world...
I looked at my two companions. One was a genius of the body, the other a genius of the mind. And then there was me—the guy who was just "the bridge" between them.
"Hey, guys?" I said, as we started walking toward the exit. "Since we're all friends now, does anyone want to help me find more trash-tier skill books? I have a feeling I'm going to need a lot of them."
Jin-Woo sighed. "I'm not helping you hoard more garbage, Gul."
"I'll help," Seo-Yoon said, her voice sounding entirely too clinical. "I want to see exactly what kind of 'trash' a Rank-E uses to kill a Chimera. For science, of course."
I grinned. This was going to be great. I had the muscle, I had the brains, and I had a System that let me turn garbage into gold.
Now I just had to make sure I didn't accidentally fuse my house with my cat.