"Forget the details for now. Zabuza, listen to me. I think I've figured out who actually wrote this novel. It was…"
Kakashi stopped halfway through as something suddenly occurred to him, and immediately changed direction.
"Uchiha Madara."
"Uchiha Madara? Kakashi, if you're going to make shit up, at least come up with something believable!"
Zabuza's tone turned unfriendly.
"I'm serious. Zabuza, you know about Susanoo, right?"
"I didn't before, but these days there probably aren't many people who don't."
Zabuza was referring, of course, to the influence that the Land of Snow's film industry had spread throughout the shinobi world through its partnership with Amegakure.
"Good. Then this will be easier to explain. Actually…"
Kakashi paused dramatically.
"Uchiha Madara's Susanoo isn't really called Susanoo."
"?"
"Strictly speaking, only Uchiha Itachi's Susanoo is called Susanoo. Sasuke's is called Takemikazuchi, while Uchiha Madara's is called Ryomen Sukuna."
"You can tell from both their abilities and appearances."
Kakashi delivered his explanation with a straight face.
"…What exactly are you saying?"
Zabuza stared at him suspiciously.
"You've personally seen all three of their Susanoo? Or did Uchiha Madara tell you that himself?"
"Fine, then answer this. What's the Susanoo belonging to your Mangekyō Sharingan called?"
"I don't have a Susanoo. The basic requirement for unlocking one is possessing both eyes first. As for how I know all of this…"
Kakashi hesitated.
He was debating whether he should invent another story.
The problem with lying was that once you told one lie, you often had to tell ten more just to keep the first one from falling apart.
"Kakashi is telling the truth."
Another voice suddenly came from the distance.
Wait.
Why did it feel like someone was always suddenly speaking from the distance around here?
Everyone turned toward the newcomer.
It was a legendary shinobi—Swimsuit Chiyo!
Granny Chiyo was wearing a swimsuit and sunglasses, with a blanket draped around her shoulders.
One glance was enough to tell that she had been relaxing in the neighboring resort area only moments ago.
Everyone then remembered that there was actually nothing strange about Chiyo being here.
She had been brought to the Land of Water for a vacation by Hōzuki Gengetsu quite some time ago.
Still, with one person after another constantly appearing, this place was beginning to feel less like a training ground and more like some kind of spawn point.
"Old hag, why are you so eager to defend Kakashi? Is he your damn emperor or something?"
Zabuza immediately snapped at her without the slightest respect.
Chiyo might have been a respected elder of Sunagakure, but she was not from Kirigakure.
Besides, Zabuza was not even a Kirigakure shinobi anymore.
And as far as his personal tastes were concerned?
Kirigakure was famous for femboys.
Old women were in a completely different category.
"This book seems to have started circulating from Kirigakure. I was bored during my vacation, so I read a little of it."
Chiyo removed her sunglasses and looked at them.
"At the beginning, Sukuna devours his own brother and gains cursed power from him."
"Doesn't that sound familiar?"
"It does."
Kakashi immediately picked up where she left off.
"I've heard the story from Uchiha Itachi, Makoto, the First Hokage, and the Second Hokage."
"Uchiha Madara obtained the Eternal Mangekyō Sharingan by taking in the power of his younger brother, Uchiha Izuna."
"According to the Uchiha clan's records, Madara was the first person to achieve it."
"And precisely because that story about Madara existed, when Itachi defected and left Sasuke alive, his excuse about wanting Sasuke to awaken the Mangekyō so he could later obtain the Eternal Mangekyō sounded believable to people who didn't know the truth."
After that chain of explanations, the whole theory suddenly sounded far more plausible.
"So Sukuna is actually based on Uchiha Madara?"
Zabuza was halfway convinced now, but one major problem remained.
"Then what about Uraume?"
"Don't tell me Uchiha Madara also had some pretty boy who looked like Haku following him around."
"The answer to that is actually hidden in what I just explained."
Chiyo raised a hand before Kakashi could speak, signaling that she would answer this one herself.
The moment the three gossipmongers saw that, they immediately leaned toward one another.
"There's something going on here. Something serious. Why is Granny Chiyo taking such good care of Kakashi?"
"Exactly. Didn't Kakashi already agree to give up on Granny Chiyo and go after Uchiha Obito's grandmother instead?"
"This is called lingering attachment. Granny Chiyo's true love really is Kakashi."
"Honestly, Granny Chiyo liking Kakashi makes sense. Out of all the people chasing her, Kakashi is probably the best-looking one, even if he is a little questionable."
"But at Granny Chiyo's tiger-like age, being questionable might not even be a flaw. It could be a bonus."
"By that logic, Granny Chiyo definitely wouldn't choose any of those Edo Tensei guys. Uchiha Madara and the rest would have to stand aside, because they can't even use the Sage Mode shortcut."
"That makes sense. That makes so much sense."
In the past, Pakura would absolutely have scolded the three girls for letting their imaginations run wild.
Now?
All she wanted to say was: That makes sense.
Cruel reality had already shattered Pakura's old understanding of the shinobi world.
Especially after Temari and Tokiwa told her what had supposedly happened between Uzumaki Naruto and Kazekage Gaara.
Pakura increasingly felt that forgiving Sunagakure without actually returning to live there had been the correct decision.
And the most ridiculous part had happened just before they entered the Flying Raijin Formation to leave.
Gaara had given Naruto one final farewell.
He wanted to shake Naruto's hand.
Yes.
Exactly like the farewell scene mentioned earlier, at the end of the Kazekage Rescue arc in the original story, when Naruto's group prepared to return to Konoha.
If it had merely been a handshake—even if it had been as suspicious as the original scene, with Gaara using sand to physically push Naruto's hand into his own—Pakura would not have thought much of it.
Far worse things had already happened.
Gaara had already used Naruto's hand for that. Why would a handshake matter anymore?
The problem was that Gaara had not merely used his sand to guide Naruto's hand into a farewell handshake.
Just as everyone assumed that was all he was doing, and the Flying Raijin Formation activated to teleport them away—
Pakura saw it.
Gaara had used the sand to make a mold of Naruto's hand.
That had been the real reason he wrapped Naruto's hand in sand!
Pakura did not even dare imagine what Gaara planned to do with it.
Was he going to create a personal Sage Mode shortcut accelerator for himself?
If even the Kazekage and the Nine-Tails' jinchūriki behaved this suspiciously, then one could only imagine what the general atmosphere in their villages had become.
And Kakashi was already infamous as the author of obscene novels.
At this point, Pakura would not be surprised by any bizarre or indecent thing he did.
"Zabuza, you still haven't realized it?"
Chiyo finally continued.
"Like you said, Kirigakure is famous for producing femboys."
"So Uraume represents Kirigakure!"
"Don't forget that Uchiha Madara once controlled the Fourth Mizukage, Yagura. That incident left an enormous scar on the entire village."
"Why do you think this novel originated in Kirigakure?"
"Somebody here must have written it specifically to preserve and spread the story of what happened back then."
"And if this old woman remembers correctly…"
"Wasn't the Fourth Mizukage Yagura something of a femboy himself?"
"…"
---------
Read 40 chapters ahead and support me on patreon.
patreon (.)com/Newbietranslator