By sunset, the clones had vanished, leaving the house fully furnished. Naruto had passed out on the new living room rug, exhausted.
"Good work, buddy," I threw a blanket over him. "Dream of Ramen."
I went upstairs to the master bedroom. It was time for the finishing touches.
"Shadow Clone Jutsu."
I created five copies of myself.
"Alright," I told my clones. "Interior design time. Make it look... cultured."
The clones nodded and got to work.
I walked to the window, looking out at the village. I saw the power lines stretching across the rooftops. I saw the satellite dish on a nearby building.
"Man," I muttered, leaning against the sill. "Kishimoto really phoned it in with the world-building, didn't he?"
I rubbed my chin.
"I mean, look at this. We have refrigerators. We have electric lights. We have wireless radios."
I pointed at the distance.
"There's a movie theater in the capital. They make feature films! Princess Gale and all that. But when we need to send a message to the Sand Village? Do we use a phone? No. We tie a piece of paper to a bird leg and hope a hawk doesn't eat it."
I shook my head. "It's schizophrenia. High-tech, low-tech mess."
My mind wandered to the movies.
Yukie Fujikaze, I thought. The actress from the Land of Snow. She's definitely real in this timeline.
A wicked idea formed.
"The movie industry here is untapped potential," I mused. "Action movies are fine. But you know what Konoha really needs? Adult Cinema."
Imagine the sales. 'Kunoichi in Distress'. 'The Anbu's Secret Mission'. Starring... well, maybe I can convince Anko she needs extra cash.
"Hey, Boss!" a Clone shouted from the wall. "Where do you want the 'Beach Episode' poster?"
I turned around. The room was transforming.
It wasn't a traditional ninja room. It was a monument to my System Gacha pulls.
"Put it over the bed," I ordered.
The wall was plastered with posters I had pulled as "Trash" items from the System Shop.
A poster of a bikini-clad model holding a giant shuriken.A pin-up of the Mizukage (Mei Terumi) looking sultry. (System Description: 'Artist's Rendition - 99% Accurate').A neon sign that just said "BONK".
On the shelf, I arranged my "collectibles."
A frantic-looking alarm clock (Doraemon world).A bottle of "Love Potion No. 9" (Harry Potter world).A statue of a Tentacle Monster (Don't ask).
"Perfect," I nodded, looking at the room. It smelled of new furniture and bad decisions.
A Clone walked in holding a framed photo of the Hokage.
"Where does this go?"
"Trash," I said immediately. "Replace it with the limited edition Icha Icha cover art."
"On it."
I flopped onto the king-sized bed. It had reinforced springs. I tested the bounce.
Squeak. Squeak.
"Sturdy," I grinned at the ceiling. "Maybe I should invite Akane to test this someday."
****
The moving chaos had settled. Naruto was snoring on the couch downstairs, dreaming of Ramen. The clones had vanished. My new villa stood silent and proud under the moonlight.
But a good neighbor doesn't just isolate himself. A good neighbor establishes dominance... I mean, connections.
I walked out onto my porch, holding a box of expensive tea cakes I had bought earlier.
"Let's see who lives next door," I muttered, looking at the house to my right. It was a modest, traditional place. Quiet. Too quiet.
I walked over to the wooden gate and rang the bell.
Ding-dong.
I waited.
No answer.
I sensed a presence inside. Sharp. Alert.
Ding-dong.
"I know you're in there," I called out cheerfully. "I have cake! And I'm not selling insurance!"
Footsteps approached. Light. Almost silent. If I didn't have [Observation Haki], I wouldn't have heard them.
The door cracked open.
"Who is it?" a cold, female voice asked.
"Your new neighbor," I flashed my best innocent-boy smile. "Kenji Sato. Just moved in next door. Thought I'd pay my respects."
The door opened fully.
And my jaw hit the floor.
Standing there was a woman with long, straight purple hair that cascaded down her back like a silk waterfall. Her eyes were sharp, dark, and dangerous.
But it wasn't her face that caught my attention.
Because she was at home, off-duty, she wasn't wearing the standard, bulky flak jacket or the porcelain ANBU mask.
She was wearing a loose, thin gray tank top and short training shorts.
The tank top was... struggling. It clung to a figure that was clearly honed by years of rigorous physical training—toned arms, a flat stomach, and a chest that defied the laws of ninja stealth. She was sweaty, glistening slightly as if she had just finished a workout.
[Passive Skill: Anatomy Scan - Active]
[Target: Yugao Uzuki (Codename: Xiyan/Yugao)]
[Rank: ANBU Captain (Kenjutsu Specialist).]
[Status: Off-Duty / Sweaty / Dangerous.]
[Measurements: B88 (Perfect) - W58 - H88.]
Jackpot.