Chapter 38: This Old Man Shed Blood for Hidden Sand Village!!!
Underground, Land of Grass.
"Lord Madara! Lord Madara! I'm back, y'know!"
"Did Lord Madara eat properly today?"
"Shut up, idiot!"
Uchiha Madara, roused by Obito, cursed loudly.
"Ara-ya, Lord Madara's awake."
"Does Lord Madara need to pee? A poo is fine too—just say the word and I'll help…"
"Shut it, fool!"
"My, my, Lord Madara's as lively as ever."
"Lord Madara, look what great thing I brought this time!"
"Ta-da!!!"
Before Madara could speak, Obito had already pulled the thing out.
"Here it is—Big Watermelon!"
"It's the newest fruit cultivar, super sweet; it hasn't even hit the markets in Hidden Sand Village. I specially plucked it from the lab."
"Idiot, I told you this old man no longer needs food!"
"Eh, really?"
Obito glanced at the countless skewers at Madara's feet and the White Zetsu beside him sweeping melon-seed shells.
"Ahem—those things were about to spoil. Don't you know caves don't ventilate? If they rot, you expect me to live among festering garbage?"
Caught red-handed, Madara remained unflustered, spouting righteous words with a calm face.
Truly the "Shura of the Ninja World" who'd braved seas of blades and flame.
"Eh~, so Lord Madara likes food that's almost spoiled. I'll set the watermelon aside."
He turned to leave.
"Come back!"
"Does Lord Madara have orders?"
"Leave the watermelon—fruit rots fast once picked."
"Eh~, is that so? As expected of Lord Madara, you know everything."
"Crack—" (the sound of a melon being split).
"Lord Madara, how is it? Tasty?"
"Not bad!"
Madara answered absently while wolfing it down.
"Great! I knew Lord Madara would like it."
"I cultivated this watermelon myself!"
"For this melon I traipsed half the Ninja World, gathered countless poos, and finally blended the perfect fertilizer!"
…"
"Eh! Lord Madara, why'd you stop eating?"
"God!"
"What're you saying, Lord Madara?"
"Lo!"
"Is it thanks to my efforts?"
"Heaven!"
"Waaah~, Lord Madara, you finally approve of me!"
"Conquest!"
"Ah, Lord Madara, I'll come see you again! Tell me if you crave anything~~~~"
"Fool! All because of that idiot Hashirama!"
"Where's Black Zetsu?"
"Reporting to Lord Madara: Black Zetsu is still in the Land of Grass screening candidates for you."
"Mm. How's the eye?"
"The eye's doing well—currently enrolled in Suna's academy, grades are excellent!"
"Keep watch. Monitor the Five Great Nations; wait till the eye matures."
"Yes, Lord Madara!"
Withdraw."
"Sir!"
Soon only Uchiha Madara remained in the cave, with munch-munch sounds continuing.
"Next time tell that fool to wash it before bringing it!"
With that, he sank back into slumber… "You're just letting him go?"
"Relax, teacher—he's a filial kid, and I even gave him a raise."
As if recalling something, Shamon didn't contradict Saito's words.
"Fine—truly a dutiful, simple child!"
…"
"Alright, teacher. I used natural energy to nourish your body—another decade of life, easy."
"Thank you, Saito!"
Feeling the vitality now coursing within, Shamon beamed at Saito.
Never imagined natural energy could be used like this—astonishing."
"Of course. The sages of the Three Great Holy Lands lived millennia precisely by constantly nourishing themselves with natural energy."
"I see. Then why…"
"Teacher wants to ask: the First Hokage also wielded natural energy, so why did he die so young?"
"Exactly. Rumor says the First Hokage possessed Sage Mode, blending Chakra with natural energy into mightier Sage Chakra!"
Different. The First Hokage merely drew natural energy into his body and fused it with his Chakra—he didn't absorb it into himself, so his body never received its nourishment."
"Sō ka! Then how come you can, Saito?"
"People's constitutions differ, that's all!"
Shamon: "Heh-heh! Indeed!"
"So how long can you live now?"
"About a thousand years."
…"
"Eh, teacher, where are you going?"
Watching his teacher stride outside as if resolved, Saito called after him.
"On vacation!"
"Weren't you just doing experiments?"
Hearing Saito's question, Shamon paused and asked,
"Little Yan, how strong do you think you are now?"
"Hmmmmm… so-so. At most five people can beat me."
Saito answered after careful thought.
Should be fewer than five.
Peak-condition Madara counts as one.
Isshiki lurking in the shadows counts as one.
That old man playing dead in the Pure Land counts as one.
The brother of the old man on the moon also counts as one.
One unfilial son counts as half.
Yep, four and a half—no more than five.
Perfect.
"Then it's settled. With you around, Hidden Sand Village is guaranteed safe for at least a millennium. I've toiled for the village most of my life—can't I enjoy myself?"
Saito: "…"
In the end, Shamon simply walked away, resolute, never once looking back!
—
That afternoon, many saw Second Kazekage Shamon stroll out of Suna's gates in shorts and a tee, climb into his own car.
Whenever anyone asked, he'd say,
"Going to see the sea!"
Everyone grieved, assuming the Second's time was near and he wished to see the ocean one last time.
After all,
Everyone had seen the Second grow younger.
What did that signify?
A flash of sunset before the end!
The Second's days were numbered!
All offered their sincerest blessings
to the old man who'd devoted his life to Hidden Sand Village!
Of course,
that was the uninformed.
The informed were already bawling in the Kazekage's office.
"Lord Kazekage! This old man… this old man has busted his guts for Suna half his life! My grandson was just born! Aaaahhh!!! Lord Kazekage! I too want to watch the sea with Lord Second, but I can't walk anymore—I'm… I'm crippled!!!"
Elder Yuan Yi, leaning on his cane, locked Saito in an embrace, sniveling and wailing.
[Elder Yuan Yi was the one who publicly opposed Saito at the council.]
"Me too, Lord Kazekage! I stayed single for Konoha's sake—now I'm completely spent! Poor me, racked my brains for Suna all my life, yet not a single descendant to keep vigil for me—how tragic! Still grinding over documents ten-plus hours a day at my age—how tragic!!"
Ebizo howled, sprawled at his feet.
Of course,
they weren't alone.
Five elders now clung to Saito; those who couldn't find space simply wailed about the office.
"All right, all right—Elder Ebizo, tally each elder's contributions; come to me based on merit."
"Heh-heh, understood, Lord Kazekage—hehehe!"
Hearing Saito relent, Ebizo sprang up, chirped, and hurried off.
The other elders, hearing the verdict, followed Ebizo out.
"Oh—and keep it secret! Wear disguise when you leave—it's not time yet!"
"Got it! We understand!"
Relieved it wasn't a reversal, the elders all nodded eagerly.
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