"Since everything was resolved so quickly, there was hardly any major impact," Muten Natsu explained as he updated Retsu Unohana on the situation in Soul Society. "The Reiatsu from so many Captains caused some confusion, but since the Captains themselves were all present, they quickly brought the unrest under control."
The communications system that had been deliberately sabotaged earlier had now been fully repaired, and the Denreishinki was functioning normally again.
"Rangiku also uncovered some useful information in secret, which made up for the trouble caused by her earlier escape." Muten Natsu glanced at Rukia Kuchiki, who was working beside him. "All that's left is some final cleanup. I'm helping Rukia with the report, so I'll come back tomorrow."
On the other end of the Denreishinki, Retsu Unohana nodded gently. "All right. Don't remain in Soul Society too long. When you return tomorrow, bring Rukia back with you."
Retsu Unohana ended the call, then turned to Orihime Inoue with a gentle smile. "Do you feel better now?"
"Mm-hmm!" Orihime Inoue nodded vigorously. She trusted Muten Natsu's strength, but that had not stopped her from worrying.
Now that she had received definite news, she finally felt more at ease. She should be able to get a good night's sleep...
Except she could not.
After tossing and turning for some time, Orihime Inoue hugged her pillow to her chest and knocked on the door to Muten Natsu's bedroom.
Retsu Unohana opened the door. The pitiful look on Orihime Inoue's face inexplicably reminded her of Muten Natsu.
"Can't sleep?"
"Mm..." Orihime Inoue nodded miserably.
"Come in."
Retsu Unohana let Orihime Inoue into the room. Once she had lain down on the bed, Retsu Unohana reached over and switched off the bedroom light.
Lying on her side beside Orihime Inoue, Retsu Unohana began gently patting her out of habit.
"Is it because of the battle earlier?"
Orihime Inoue had settled down and closed her eyes beneath the gentle patting, but her brow soon furrowed. Her slender fingers clutched the edge of the blanket, and her large, beautiful eyes trembled.
"There, there. Don't be afraid..." Retsu Unohana softly stroked Orihime Inoue's warm, sunlit hair and soothed her in a tender voice. "Everything is all right..."
"Unohana-san..." A faint sob slipped into Orihime Inoue's voice despite her efforts to hold it back. She instinctively edged closer to Retsu Unohana, only to stop just before they touched.
Retsu Unohana opened her arms and drew Orihime Inoue into her embrace.
Wrapped in that warmth, Orihime Inoue almost greedily sank into Retsu Unohana's tenderness.
"I'm sorry, Orihime." Feeling Orihime Inoue tremble slightly in her arms, Retsu Unohana lowered her gaze. "The situation was desperate then, and my power had not yet recovered. I had no choice but to guide you that way. It was all my fault..."
"No... it wasn't." Orihime Inoue shook her head against Retsu Unohana's chest. "It was my fault. I should have used that power sooner to help everyone. I knew I could do it, but..."
"But you don't like hurting people, do you?" Retsu Unohana looked down at her. "You would rather take away pain than inflict it. That is your kindness. It is that very kindness that gave you the power to protect and heal others. It could never be a fault."
"But... kindness alone isn't enough, is it?" Orihime Inoue's voice broke. "I wish I could have been more decisive. They were enemies, but I was still afraid to hurt them. Even after I did hurt them, I was terrified by what I'd done. I know I shouldn't think this way, but I still can't let it go... I hate being like this, yet I can never change."
"I don't think there is anything you need to change," Retsu Unohana said with a soft laugh. "Isn't this perfectly fine? No, perhaps this is the best way to be."
Confused, Orihime Inoue raised her head. Her eyes were rimmed with red.
"Why?"
Retsu Unohana met her gaze. "There are things we must do and things we must face. But that does not mean we have to become cold when we do them. Nor does it mean we must face them with calm indifference or numbness."
Orihime Inoue's large eyes remained full of confusion. She understood the words Retsu Unohana was saying, but not what they truly meant.
"Hmm..." Retsu Unohana hesitated for a moment, then shook her head. "Let me explain it this way. I killed Muten many times."
"What?!" The confusion in Orihime Inoue's eyes instantly turned to disbelief. Her first thought was that Retsu Unohana had to be lying.
But Retsu Unohana had no reason to lie. And when Orihime Inoue recalled the state she had seen Retsu Unohana in back in Soul Society during the Battle of Karakura Town, she felt that it had to be true.
Still...
"There must have been a special reason, right?"
"It was to awaken his power and make him master Bankai within a short period of time."
Retsu Unohana briefly explained what she had discovered while treating Muten Natsu, as well as the principle behind driving him to attain Bankai.
"At the time, I had to kill him over and over again. Only by hovering between life and death could he grasp the true power he possessed."
Orihime Inoue suddenly realized how insignificant her own turmoil seemed compared to what Retsu Unohana had endured.
Muten Natsu had practically been raised in Retsu Unohana's bed. Everyone knew how deeply she doted on him.
Yet she had been forced to kill Muten Natsu with her own hands again and again. She had played the villain as convincingly as she could, using every method at her disposal to torment him.
Orihime Inoue's lips moved faintly. "I'm so useless. Compared to what you went through, my problems are..."
"That isn't true. Everyone has their own pain. Someone else suffering more than you does not mean you should ignore your own suffering."
Retsu Unohana extended a finger and gently tapped the tip of Orihime Inoue's nose.
"What I mean is that killing Muten again and again was something I had to do, and watching him die such terrible deaths over and over was something I had to face. But that did not mean I should remain calm about it. It did not mean I should become numb to it."
Orihime Inoue tried to place herself in Retsu Unohana's position and imagine what she must have felt then, but the mere thought left her struggling to breathe.
Just imagining it hurt so much that she could not bear to continue.
"It is because it caused me such pain that I cherish the peace we have now even more," Retsu Unohana whispered. "The same is true for you. Not wanting to hurt others and feeling pain when you do are both precious forms of kindness. We cannot avoid the things we must do, but we do not need to harden our hearts because of them. That pain and struggle are part of us. They are part of what makes us who we are."
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