The lounge was still ringing with laughter, but Alexander wasn't finished. He stood in the center of the room, his small hands on his hips, looking like a tiny, pajama-clad prosecutor. He looked from the wedding photo to Jay's growing stomach, and then back at Keifer with a look of pure suspicion.
POV: Jay (Jasper Jean Mariano)
"Okay," Alexander said, his voice dropping into a serious whisper. "If I wasn't at the party... then where was I? Did you keep me in a box? Is that why we live in a Black Box?"
The room exploded. Percy (Blue Eyes) literally choked on his drink, and Keigan had to turn away to hide his shaking shoulders.
"Oh, this is going to be good," Rory muttered, leaning forward. "Who's taking this one?"
Aries (Horoscope) stepped forward, waving a crystal with a dramatic flourish. "Alexander, my nephew! You were a stardust particle floating in the Milky Way! Your Dad used a giant net made of pure gold to catch you and bring you down to Earth!"
Alexander blinked, unimpressed. "A net? I'm a ninja, Uncle Aries. I would have cut the net."
"Actually," Ci n chimed in, leaning back with a mischievous grin. "You were a top-secret experiment in a lab. We were trying to grow a baby with the grumpiness of a Watson and the appetite of a Mariano. It was a 99% success rate."
"Ci n!" I gasped, swatting his arm while I turned bright red. "Don't tell him that!"
"Wait!" Keiran shouted, jumping onto the back of the sofa. "I have the real answer! Alexander, you were actually my pet dog in a past life, and you were so good at fetching my slippers that the Universe decided to make you a human so you could talk back to Kuifer!"
"I was a dog?" Alexander's eyes went wide. "Did I have a tail? Dad! Did I have a tail?!"
Keifer cleared his throat, rubbing the bridge of his nose. He looked like he wanted the floor to open up and swallow him. "No, Alexander. You did not have a tail. And you weren't a dog. Keiran is going to be doing extra security shifts for that one."
"I have a theory!" Mayo yelled from the back of the room, holding a scoop of ice cream like a microphone. "He was delivered by a drone! A high-end, Watson-tech drone with a little parachute!"
"A drone?!" Alexander liked that idea. "Did it have lasers?"
"Definitely had lasers," Kit added, nodding solemnly.
I looked at Pa Pa (Jasper) and Ma (Jeena), who were both laughing so hard they were leaning on each other. Grandpa David was just chuckling, shaking his head at the insanity.
"Hubby, do something," I whispered, burying my face in Keifer's chest as the blushing reached a fever pitch. "They're confusing him!"
Keifer sighed, a deep, heavy sound. He picked Alexander up, looking him straight in the eye. "Listen to me, Alexander. You weren't a dog, you weren't stardust, and you certainly didn't come from a drone with lasers."
"Then where?!" Alexander demanded.
Keifer glanced at me, his ears still pink, and then looked back at our son. "You were waiting in your Mumma's heart. And when we got married, the door opened and you came out to be with us."
The room went "Awww" in a collective, mocking chorus from Section E.
"That's so cheesy, Kuya! I think I'm going to be sick!" Keiran gagged, while Percy started making kissing noises.
Alexander considered Keifer's answer for a long moment. Then he looked at my stomach. "So... is the new ninja in your heart too, Mumma? Or is he in your tummy because he's hungry for the chocolate mangoes?"
"Definitely the tummy," Angelo (Kuya Angelo) grumbled, finally speaking up from the corner. "Because if he were in her heart, he wouldn't be making her crave salt-and-vinegar ice cream at three in the morning."
"The boy has logic," David laughed.
Alexander finally seemed satisfied, though he did lean over and whisper to my stomach, "If you see my red car in there, don't touch it. It's for big ninjas only."
Alexander finally seemed satisfied, though he did lean over and whisper to my stomach, "If you see my red car in there, don't touch it. It's for big ninjas only."
I leaned against Keifer, my face finally cooling down. The chaos was insane, the answers were ridiculous, and my son thought he used to be a dog with lasers—but as I looked around at the laughing faces of our crazy, beautiful family, I wouldn't have it any other way.
The teasing didn't just stop at Alexander's questions; it evolved into a full-scale psychological assault on Keifer's dignity. The Section E boys and the Watson-Mariano brothers sensed blood in the water, and they weren't about to let the "Monster" off the hook for his rare display of blushing.
POV: Jay (Jasper Jean Mariano)
I tried to hide my face in the crook of Keifer's neck, but it was no use. The room was already a shark tank of laughter.
"Oh, look at them!" Percy (Blue Eyes) crowed, pointing a finger at us. "The legendary Ice King of the Watson Empire and the Cold Surgeon of the Marianos are turning the same color as the velvet in this album. I didn't know you two were capable of such... human emotions."
"It's the 'Heart' answer," Keiran snickered, clutching his stomach. "'You were waiting in your Mumma's heart.' Kuya, did you get that from a Hallmark card, or did you pay a scriptwriter to come up with something that cheesy?"
"I think he's been reading those romance novels Lia leaves around the house," Mayo yelled from the kitchen doorway, brandishing a spoon. "Next thing you know, he'll be writing poetry about starlight and destiny!"
Keifer tightened his grip on me, his jaw set in that familiar, rigid line. "If everyone is quite finished," he growled, though the effect was completely ruined by the deep crimson stain on his ears, "we have things to discuss regarding the second-trimester security."
"Security?" Aries (Horoscope) interjected, fluttering his hands dramatically. "How can you protect her from the power of love, Keifer? The stars say you're currently suffering from an 'Overload of Sentimentality.' It's a very rare condition for a Grumpy Capricorn."
"Aries, I will literally throw that crystal out the window," Keifer muttered.
The Wedding Video Nightmare
"Wait, wait!" Felix (the IT genius) shouted, his eyes gleaming with mischief. "Since we're on the topic of the 'Secret Wedding' Alexander missed... I think it's time for a little trip down memory lane. I happen to have the raw footage from the reception on the main server."
"Felix, don't you dare," I warned, but it was too late.
The giant 90-inch screen in the lounge flickered to life. Suddenly, the room was filled with the sounds of a high-end string quartet. On screen, a younger, slightly less scarred Keifer was standing on the dance floor, holding me like I was the only solid thing in a shifting universe.
The video cut to the speeches. A very drunk Percy was on screen, toast in hand, yelling, "If Keifer doesn't treat my sister like a queen, I have a sniper rifle and a very clear line of sight!"
Then came the clip that made the whole room howl.
It was the "First Look" footage. The camera caught the exact moment Keifer saw me in my dress. The "Monster" of the business world—the man who currently had a price on the heads of three international cartels—had actually stumbled. He looked like a deer caught in headlights, his mouth slightly open, looking completely and utterly whipped.
"Look at his face!" Rory roared, slapping his knee. "He's glitching! The Watson OS has encountered a 'Jay-Related Error' and needs to restart!"
"He looks like he's forgotten how to breathe," Ci n added, wiping a tear of laughter from his eye. "And Jay... Jay looks like she's trying not to laugh at him."
The Teasing Peaks
Alexander watched the screen with intense focus. "Dad, why are your eyes watery in the video? Did you have an allergy to the flowers?"
"Yes, Alexander," Keigan drawled, a rare smirk on his face. "He was very allergic to the idea of anyone else ever looking at your Mumma. It's a chronic condition."
"Is that why he follows her to the bathroom now?" Kit asked, leaning against the wall. "I saw him standing outside the door yesterday with a thermal scanner. I thought there was an assassin in the toilet, but no, he was just checking if the floor was too slippery for her."
"Keifer!" I laughed, hitting his chest. "You used a thermal scanner?!"
"The tiles were wet, wifey!" Keifer defended himself, finally losing his cool. "And you're pregnant! Gravity is not your friend right now!"
"See?!" Percy yelled. "The Monster is now a Safety Inspector! I want a badge made for him. 'Chief of the Pregnancy Police!'"
Alexander jumped up, inspired. "I can be the Deputy! I have the sword!"
Grandpa David was chuckling so hard his cane was rattling against the floor. Ma and Tita Gemma were busy taking photos of us blushing, probably to send to the rest of the family group chat.
The Final Blow
"Alright, alright," Ion (Ate Ion) said, trying to save us, though she was still smiling. "Let's leave them alone. They've had a long day."
"One last thing!" Keiran shouted as everyone started to disperse. "Kuya, since you're so good at the 'Heart' stories... what are you going to tell the new baby when she asks why you're always glaring at her boyfriends in twenty years?"
Keifer's face went from red to a terrifying, pale stillness. He stood up, towering over the room, the teasing finally hitting his one true weakness: the thought of anyone touching his future daughter.
"In twenty years," Keifer said, his voice dropping into a tone that made even Section E go quiet, "there will be no boyfriends. There will only be a very high wall, a lot of dogs, and Section E on permanent guard duty. Anyone who crosses the perimeter will be dealt with... clinically."
"And there it is!" Percy laughed, throwing a cushion at him. "The Monster is back! The Heart stories only last until someone mentions a date!"
As the chaos moved toward the dining room, Keifer pulled me close, his breath warm against my ear. "They're all going on extra night-watch duty for this, Jay. Every single one of them."
"It was worth it, hubby," I whispered, kissing his cheek. "You were very cute in that video. Especially when you glitched."
"I'm not cute, wifey," he grumbled, though he didn't pull away. "I'm a nightmare."
"My favorite nightmare," I replied.