'kugh...dammit, the stupid rope won't tighten. At this rate, I won't...'
Fin was currently 25 years old, living in omafo and... he lost all his family members, one by one. He has always been soft hearted, too caring, but he never expected the pain to be this severe. He went to doctors and many psychiatrists but they all told him the say useless stuff, that the pain will heal with time.
'It's been a whole year and the pain is just getting worse... I miss them so much.' His eyes start to tear up.
He had a big problem though, he was at the lowest point in this life, he could not take it anymore. His body was weak, his mind was breaking down, there was nothing else worth living for in this world, so he tried killing himself multiple times but he never died.
'I don't know what force is out there watching over me but please, just let me rest, I can't take it anymore, please.' Tear flowed down his cheek as he stood up and put his head through the rope.
He had high hopes that today it would finally work but to no one's surprise, it snapped and he fell down. He stayed there, not moving and then began to cry, this seemed to be his fate, even death didn't want him, he was going to suffer alone.
'Why... why won't it just end?!'
He looked up at the sky through his blurry eyes, suddenly remembering all the memories of his family, which just made the pain worse.
{flashback}
"Hey Fin, about...you know, mom and dad," she got closer and leaned her head against his shoulder, barely holding back her tears, "I am really glad you are here. You have always been there for me, even though I know you are also in pain, you always put yourself last."
She wrapped her arms around her, "Thank you so much for being the best brother ever. I love you so much."
He didn't know it then but a few days after that heart warming moment, Emma would lose her life on her way from school. He was called at the hospital to identify the body and that was the day his whole world shattered.
"E-Emma?" He walked up to the body, his hands trembling terribly. The doctor stepped back, knowing Fin needed some space.
One look at her face and everything went silent in his head, "Please... no... not you too," he fell to his knees, finding it hard to breathe.
His sister's face was pale, so pale it didn't even look real. There was a small cut on her forehead and some bruising on her cheek. She looked like she was sleeping.
"Emma... Emma, wake up. Come on, this isn't funny," his voice cracked as he reached out with shaking hands to touch her cold face. "Wake up, please wake up. I'll... I'll make your favorite food, okay? I'll buy you that game you wanted. Just... just open your eyes."
No matter how much he called out, there was no response.
"Emma!"
He grabbed her shoulders and started shaking her, his voice rising into a scream.
"Wake up! Wake up please! Don't leave me! You can't leave me! You're all I have left!"
The doctor rushed over, "Sir, please, you need to-"
"Get off me!" She shoved him away violently. "Emma! Emma please!"
He collapsed over her body, sobbing uncontrollably, his hands gripping her hospital gown.
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I should have picked you up from school, I should have been there, this is my fault, this is all my fault, please come back, please, I'll do anything, just come back—"
It took three nurses and two security guards to pull him away from her body.
He was screaming the entire time.
"No! Let me go! Emma! Emma don't leave me! I can't do this without you! Please!"
{end flashback}
He was still lying on the ground, the broken rope next to him, tears streaming down his face as that memory played over and over in his head.
'Emma... I'm so sorry...'
He started hyperventilating, his chest tightening as panic set in.
"No, no, no, no, no-"
He clawed at his chest like he could rip the pain out physically.
"It hurts, it hurts so much, make it stop, make it stop!"
He started slamming his fists against the ground, over and over.
"Why did you take her?! Why?! She was only eighteen! She had her whole life ahead of her! She didn't deserve this!"
His voice filled the air, raw and desperate.
"Take me instead! Do you hear me?! Take me! I'm the one who should have died! Not her! Not Mom! Not Dad! Me! It should have been me!"
He was screaming at the sky now, at God, at whatever cruel force was watching him suffer.
"Give her back! Please just give her back! I'll do anything! Anything! Just let me see her one more time! Just one more time!"
His throat was damaged from screaming but he couldn't stop.
"She told me she loved me! That I was the best brother! And I... I didn't say it back! I didn't tell her I loved her too! Why didn't I say it?! Why didn't I just say it?!"
He grabbed his hair and pulled, hard enough that it hurt.
He started rocking back and forth, his entire body shaking violently.
"Emma... please... please come back... I need you... I can't do this alone... I can't..."
His vision was starting to blur, not just from tears but from lack of oxygen. He was hyperventilating so badly he couldn't catch his breath.
'Can't breathe... can't... breathe...'
[I can't stand by and watch anymore. At this rate, your soul will suffer too much from your trauma. I think that time has come.]
'Hm? A voice, it feels like it's in my head... Hello?'
[Hello Fin, it's finally good to talk to you. I am the goddess of death, I have been keeping an eye on you for some time now.]
'G-Goddess of death? Are you the one not allowing me to die?'
[I am, I can not allow you to die, it was a request from your sister after all. She sacrificed her reincarnation spot for this favor.]
'What... what do you mean? Emma? She asked you to keep me alive?'
His breathing was still ragged, his mind struggling to process what he was hearing.
[Yes. After her death, her soul came to my domain. She was supposed to reincarnate and live a new life in another world. But instead, she begged me to use that privilege to protect you.]
'No... no, that can't be right. Why would she-'
[Because she knew what you would do. She knew you would try to follow her and that the pain would be too much for you to bear alone.]
Fresh tears spilled down his face, his chest tightening even more.
'Emma... you idiot... why would you give up your next life for me?! You should have just moved on and be happy!'
[She said the exact same thing about you. That you should be happy and keep living. Those were her last words to me - "Please don't let my brother follow me. He deserves to be happy."]
He let out a broken sob, covering his face with his hands.
'I don't deserve anything! I couldn't protect her! I couldn't save any of them! What's the point of living if everyone I love is gone?!'
[The point is to honor her sacrifice. She gave up everything so you could have a chance at life. Are you really going to throw that away?]
'I... I don't know how to live without them. Every morning I wake up and for a split second I forget they're gone, and then it all comes crashing back and I-'
His voice broke completely.
'All I want is to stop existing. How am I supposed to honor her sacrifice when I can't even get out of bed most days?!'
[I understand your pain, child. That's why I'm offering you a choice now.]
'A choice? What choice? You already took away my ability to die!'
[I prevented your death because of Emma's request, yes. But I can't keep doing this forever. Watching you suffer and destroy yourself slowly... this isn't what she wanted for you either.]
He was silent, his whole body still trembling.
[So I'm giving you an option. I can send you to another world, give you a fresh start where the pain isn't so suffocating. A place you can learn to live again and find purpose again. Or...]
'Or what?'
[I can release you and let you die. But know this - if you die now, with this much hatred and trauma in your soul, Emma's sacrifice would have been for nothing.]
'So either way I'm stuck?! So I can suffer here or run away to some fantasy world like a coward?!'
[It's not running away. It's choosing to live the life your sister died to protect.]
'Don't... don't use her against me like that!'
He was crying harder now, his fists clenched so tight his nails dug into his palms.
'You don't understand! I see her face every time I close my eyes! I hear her voice! I reach for my phone to call her and then I remember she's GONE! How is going to another world supposed to fix that?!'
[It won't fix it, the pain will still be there. But in that world, you'll have something to fight for, something to protect. You'll have a purpose beyond just waking up and trying to survive another day.]
'I don't want a purpose! I want my family back!'
[And that's impossible unfortunately, I am sure you know that.]
He let out a scream of pure frustration, slamming his fist into the ground one more time.
'Then what's the point?! What's the point of any of this?!'
[The point is that Emma loved you enough to sacrifice her own future for yours. Are you really going to spit on that? Tell her that her sacrifice meant nothing?]
'That's not fair...'
[Life isn't fair, child. You know that better than anyone. But you still have a choice. Die here, right now, and make Emma's sacrifice worthless. Or take my offer and try, really try, to live again.]
He was quiet for a long moment, just lying there on the ground, staring up at the sky.
'I'm scared.'
[I know.]
He thought about Emma's last hug, the way she told him he was the best brother ever.
He thought about how she must have felt in her last moments, hoping that he would be okay without her. And how he learned that she gave up her own reincarnation just to keep him alive.
'She really was too good for this world...'
[Indeed, I have never seen a soul as pure as hers']
He took a shaky breath.
'Alright, I'll go. I can't waste my little sister's wish after all. I will try my best to live up to her expectations in this new world.
[That's all I ask.]
There was a pause, like she wanted to say something more.
[Actually... there is one more thing I need to tell you.]
'What is it?'
[Your sister's soul... it's been with me all this time. Sealed away, sleeping peacefully.]
His breath hitched.
'Sealed? What do you mean sealed?'
[After she gave up her reincarnation to protect you, her soul entered a deep sleep. She's not conscious or aware. She is simply... waiting.]
'Waiting for what?'
[That's what I want to talk to you about. I'm going to give you her soul. I will seal it inside you and send it with you to this new world.]
'What?! Why would you-'
[Because there's a way to bring her back. If you become strong enough and learn the forbidden arts of that world, you can create a body for her. A vessel for her soul to inhabit.]
'You mean... I can bring Emma back? She can live again?'
[Yes. But it won't be easy. It could take years, maybe decades. The knowledge is rare and the materials are dangerous. Only the most powerful have ever succeeded in creating a living vessel.]
'I don't care how long it takes! If there's a chance to bring her back, I'll do anything!'
[That's what I hoped you'd say. Because this is not just a gift, child. It's a contract. I'm giving you her soul, the chance to resurrect her. But when I call upon you in the future, you must answer. You will owe me a debt.]
'What kind of debt? What will you ask me to do?'
[I cannot say yet. But when the time comes, you will know. And you must be ready.]
He didn't hesitate.
'I accept. Give me Emma's soul. I'll find a way to bring her back, no matter what it takes.'
[Very good, We are done. Next time you open your eyes, your never life will begin and since you owe me a favor, I will throw in another gift to help you grow.]
Everything went dark.