Chapter 5
Part I – The Problem With Good Intentions
I did not sleep.
This was not unusual. Sleep and I had maintained a strained relationship ever since I stopped being allowed to be unconscious during emergencies.
What was unusual was the reason.
Normally, my thoughts at night were filled with patrol routes, border reports, and contingency plans. Last night, they were filled with a balcony, a soft voice, and the exact sensation of a kiss that had barely lasted a heartbeat and yet refused to leave my face.
I stared at the ceiling of my quarters and sighed.
"This is ridiculous," I muttered.
The ceiling did not argue.
Tea helped. A little.
By the time the sun rose over Eastrun, I had convinced myself of three things:
One: Lila had been kind, not romantic.
Two: Reading too much into it would only complicate matters.
Three: Sir Dorian absolutely could not be allowed to notice anything.
I was still convincing myself of these points when I walked into the guild hall and immediately saw Sir Dorian Lionsreach leaning against the front desk, smiling like a man who had noticed everything.
"Good morning," he said brightly.
I stopped walking.
"Why are you smiling like that?" I asked.
"Like what?"
"Like someone who is about to ruin my life."
He laughed. "You wound me."
"I am serious."
"So am I," he said. "I'm serious about your happiness."
"That's worse."
Lila stood behind the desk, meticulously organizing requests. She looked up at the sound of our voices and froze when she saw us together.
"Good morning," she said, polite as ever.
"Good morning," I said, trying very hard to sound normal.
Sir Dorian leaned closer to her. "Did you sleep well?"
She blinked. "Yes?"
"Good," he said. "Very good."
I grabbed him by the collar and dragged him away.
"Do not," I said through clenched teeth, "say another word to her."
Dorian raised his hands. "I haven't said anything!"
"You're thinking too loudly."
He grinned. "Rowan. My friend. I saw the way you looked at her last night."
"That was soot," I said. "In my eyes."
"Mhm."
"And the kiss?" he asked.
I froze.
"...What kiss?"
His grin widened. "Ah."
"You saw nothing," I said.
"I saw everything," he replied happily. "And I am very proud."
"I am going to throw you into the river," I said.
"After I help you," he said. "Which brings me to my plan."
"No," I said immediately.
"Listen."
"No."
"Just hear me out."
"No."
"I've already started."
I groaned.
Sir Dorian's plan, it turned out, was terrible.
This surprised no one.
"It's simple," he said, pacing my office like a general preparing for war. "You need to show her you're serious."
"I am serious," I said. "I just... haven't said anything."
"Exactly," he said. "So we create a situation."
I did not like the word create.
"What kind of situation?" I asked warily.
"A little competition," he said.
"...Explain."
He clasped his hands together. "Enter: Lord Alric Fenmere."
I stared at him.
"Who?"
"Minor noble," Dorian said. "Recently arrived. Wealthy. Charismatic. Known for his appreciation of capable women."
I stared harder.
"You are not suggesting—"
"I already invited him," Dorian said.
Silence.
"You invited a nobleman," I said slowly, "to my guild."
"Yes."
"To meet my receptionist."
"Yes."
"With the intent of making me jealous."
"Well, when you say it like that—"
I stood up.
"Dorian," I said, "this is not a game."
He sobered slightly. "I know."
"Lila is not a tool," I continued. "She is not bait."
"I know," he said again, more quietly. "But Rowan... you won't act unless something pushes you."
I hesitated.
That was... unfortunately accurate.
"I won't let this hurt her," he said. "I promise."
I exhaled slowly.
"This is still a terrible idea," I said.
"Most of mine are," he admitted cheerfully.
Lord Alric Fenmere arrived just before noon.
He was handsome.
This was immediately a problem.
Tall, well-dressed, charming smile, perfectly groomed hair — the sort of man who looked like he belonged at banquets, not guild halls filled with mud and questionable smells.
Lila looked up as he approached the desk.
"Good afternoon," he said smoothly. "I'm here on official business."
She smiled politely. "Welcome to the Silver Ember Guild. How may I help you?"
I watched from across the room, arms crossed, jaw tight.
"I was hoping to speak with Guild Master Valebright," he said. "And perhaps his assistant."
Assistant.
She corrected him gently. "Receptionist."
"An important role," he said easily. "I admire efficiency."
She flushed.
I felt something sharp twist in my chest.
This was stupid.
I was a grown man.
A legendary hero.
I should not care.
And yet.
"Lord Fenmere is interested in sponsoring several guild operations," Dorian said loudly beside me.
Too loudly.
Lila glanced toward me, eyes flicking briefly to my face.
I looked away.
Coward.
"Perhaps you could show me the guild facilities," Lord Fenmere said. "I'd enjoy learning more."
Lila hesitated.
"I can escort him," Dorian said instantly.
"No," Lord Fenmere said. "I'd prefer someone... familiar with the daily workings."
He smiled at her.
"I don't mind," Lila said. "If the Guild Master approves."
She looked at me.
Waiting.
This was it.
Say something.
Anything.
"I—" I began.
"Excellent," Dorian said. "Go on, then."
They walked away together.
I stood there, watching them go, feeling like I'd just lost a battle I hadn't even realized I was fighting.
Part II – The Jealousy Problem
I told myself I didn't care.
This was a lie.
I stood in the guild hall pretending to review quest postings while watching Lila and Lord Fenmere walk away together. She gestured politely as she spoke, explaining something about guild structure, while he listened with an attentiveness that made my jaw tighten.
She laughed at something he said.
That was worse.
"Don't glower like that," Dorian said beside me. "People will think you're about to execute someone."
"I am reviewing quests," I said.
"You are glaring at a 'Missing Goat' request like it insulted your ancestors."
I folded my arms. "This is ridiculous."
"Yes," he agreed. "Isn't it wonderful?"
"No."
Dorian leaned closer. "You could stop this at any time."
"How?" I asked.
"By admitting you care."
"I care about the guild," I said stiffly.
"Mhm."
"And her well-being."
"Mhm."
"And—" I stopped.
Dorian waited.
I exhaled sharply. "This was a mistake."
He smiled. "Progress."
They returned twenty minutes later.
Too soon.
Lila looked flushed—but not distressed. Animated. Comfortable. Lord Fenmere looked pleased with himself, which I immediately disliked on principle.
"Your guild is remarkable," Fenmere said, inclining his head toward me. "You've built something admirable here."
"Thank you," I said politely.
"You must rely greatly on Lady Fairbloom," he continued.
"I do," I said without hesitation.
Lila glanced at me, surprised.
Fenmere smiled. "She's impressive. Efficient. Intelligent."
"She is," I agreed.
Dorian coughed. Loudly.
"I was just telling her," Fenmere went on, "that someone with her talents could easily find work in noble administration."
The room went quiet.
Lila blinked. "I—thank you. But I'm quite happy here."
"Of course," he said smoothly. "Still, options are valuable."
Something cold settled in my chest.
Options.
I smiled.
"That won't be necessary," I said.
Fenmere turned toward me. "Oh?"
"She's indispensable," I continued. "To this guild."
To me.
I did not say the last part.
Lila's cheeks colored slightly.
Dorian beamed.
The day dragged on.
Lord Fenmere stayed.
That was a problem.
He joined Lila at the desk again. Helped her carry documents. Complimented her organization. Asked about her background with genuine interest.
All perfectly polite.
All perfectly infuriating.
I spent the afternoon snapping at minor inconveniences and intimidating several guild members unintentionally.
"Guild Master," Tilda the ogre said gently, "are you... upset?"
"No," I said.
She leaned closer. "You are cracking the floor."
I looked down.
I stopped.
That evening, the guild hosted a small gathering.
Dorian's idea.
Again.
"It's good for morale," he said.
"And chaos," I replied.
"Especially chaos."
Music played. Drinks flowed. Laughter echoed. Lila relaxed noticeably, chatting with members she'd only formally interacted with before.
Lord Fenmere remained at her side.
I watched from across the room, nursing a cup of tea like it had personally betrayed me.
"You're sulking," Dorian observed.
"I am observing," I said.
"You're observing like a man preparing for battle."
"I am not."
Lila laughed again.
That did it.
I set my cup down and crossed the room.
"Lila," I said. "May I speak with you?"
She turned, surprised. "Of course."
Fenmere smiled. "I was just—"
"Later," I said.
He raised an eyebrow, amused.
Lila followed me a few steps away.
"Yes?" she asked.
I opened my mouth.
Nothing came out.
She tilted her head. "Is something wrong?"
"No," I said.
Pause.
"...Yes," I admitted.
She waited patiently.
"I wanted to ask," I said slowly, "if you were comfortable with... all this."
She blinked. "All what?"
"Lord Fenmere," I said. "The attention."
She considered that.
"He's very kind," she said. "And interesting."
My heart sank.
"But," she added, "I don't like being treated like an opportunity."
Relief hit me so hard my knees nearly buckled.
"I like being here," she continued. "With the guild. With you."
I looked at her.
"Good," I said quietly.
She smiled. "You seem... tense."
"I am," I said.
"Why?"
I hesitated.
"Because," I said, "I'm not very good at this."
"At what?"
"Competing," I said. "For someone's attention."
Her expression softened.
"You don't have to compete," she said. "Just be honest."
I nodded.
I did not promise anything.
Lord Fenmere approached again shortly after.
"Guild Master," he said. "A word?"
I turned toward him.
"Yes?"
He studied me openly. "You care for her."
This was not a question.
I stiffened. "That's none of your concern."
He smiled. "Perhaps not. But it does explain things."
"Explain what?"
"Why you're watching so closely," he said. "Why you're irritated."
I said nothing.
He inclined his head. "For what it's worth, I have no intention of overstepping."
My eyes narrowed.
"She deserves someone who chooses her," he continued. "Not someone pushed by circumstance."
He stepped back. "Good evening, Guild Master."
He left shortly after.
Dorian appeared at my side, grinning.
"Well?" he asked.
I stared at the door.
"This is getting out of hand," I said.
"Yes," he agreed happily. "Isn't it great?"
"No," I said. "It's terrifying."
Part III – The Decision
I did not sleep.
Again.
This time, it wasn't because of a kiss or a rumor or a dragon.
It was because I had reached a conclusion I could no longer avoid.
If I kept waiting, I would lose her.
Not to Lord Fenmere—he was polite, perceptive, and smart enough to step back—but to indecision. To my own habit of letting the world decide things for me while I stood still.
That had never been who I was on the battlefield.
Why Is It Who I Am now?
I rose before dawn and made tea.
Then I poured it out untouched.
That was when I knew things were serious.
The guild was quiet in the early hours. Sunlight crept through high windows, painting the stone floor in pale gold. Lila stood behind the front desk, reviewing a ledger, her expression focused.
She looked up when she sensed me.
"Good morning," she said.
"Good morning," I replied.
There was something in my voice that made her straighten.
"Is everything alright?" she asked.
"No," I said honestly. "But it might be."
I gestured toward the side hall. "May we speak?"
She nodded and followed me without hesitation.
We stopped near the guild's inner courtyard, where a small fountain trickled quietly.
I turned to face her.
"I owe you clarity," I said.
Her brow furrowed. "About what?"
"About us," I said.
She inhaled sharply.
"I am not good at this," I continued. "I'm used to clear threats. Clear choices. This..." I gestured vaguely. "Is harder."
She said nothing, but her attention did not waver.
"I don't like being pushed," I said. "By nobles. By politics. By well-meaning friends."
Her lips curved slightly. "Sir Dorian?"
"Especially Sir Dorian," I said.
She smiled, then sobered.
"But," I continued, "I also don't like the idea of losing you because I was afraid to speak."
Her eyes widened.
"I care for you," I said. "Not as a guild master. Not as a symbol. As a man who enjoys tea and quiet mornings and... your laugh."
Her cheeks flushed.
"I don't know what this becomes," I said. "I won't promise what I can't guarantee. But I want to choose this. I want to choose you."
Silence stretched between us.
Then she laughed.
Soft. Breathless.
"You're terrible at speeches," she said.
"I know," I said.
"But," she added, stepping closer, "you're very good at being honest."
She met my gaze.
"I care for you too," she said. "I was just waiting for you to say it."
Something loosened in my chest that I hadn't realized was tight.
Relief nearly knocked me over.
A cough echoed from behind us.
"Ah," Sir Dorian said cheerfully, standing far too close for comfort. "There it is."
I turned slowly.
"Dorian," I said, "you are on very thin ice."
He raised his hands. "In my defense, this worked."
"Barely," I said.
Lila laughed. "Did you plan all this?"
He puffed out his chest. "I nudged fate."
"You shoved it down the stairs," I said.
"Details."
She shook her head, amused. "You're impossible."
"I know," he said. "You're welcome."
He wandered off before I could strangle him.
The rest of the day passed differently.
Not dramatically.
Just... better.
Lila smiled more easily. I found myself doing the same. Conversations flowed without tension. The guild felt lighter.
At some point, I realized I was looking forward to things.
That was new.
That evening, as the sun dipped low, Lila approached me again.
"About that tea," she said.
"Yes?" I replied.
"Tomorrow?" she asked. "No interruptions. No rumors."
I smiled.
"I'll do my best," I said.
She leaned in and kissed my cheek again.
This time, I was ready for it.
Sir Dorian caught me staring at nothing afterward.
"Well?" he asked.
"Well," I said, "if you ever try something like this again, I will actually throw you out a window."
He grinned. "Worth it."