A/N: Before you continue to read I would like you to know some things.
This is not a stupid ass translation.
There will be some liberties taken in the story(gege didn't write that much about the heian era so if it's not to your expectations please forgive me as I wrote this just to fill my curiosity a lil)
No romance(might change depending on my mood).
Op mc
Evil/chaotic mc(expect zaraki kenpachi).
Mc's appearance after reincarnation is similar to medici from lotm, search it up.(I know you hate it when author never explains what mc looks like, trust me I hate it too).
If there are any inconsistencies please write a comment on the paragraph and I will try to fix it asap!
Anyway enjoy the story and try not to roast me too much.
———
"Hey Wilson, have you ever felt death? Death of your own individual mind? Death of your own passion? Of your happiness and soul?"
I spoke calmly to Wilson trying to maintain my consciousness while my eyes are glued to the computer screen, watching nonsensical numbers turned into nonsensical words.
My friend, Wilson the trashcan which I took from a co-worker's office sat beside my desk with a crooked smile on its steel body.
I hear him shrugging his head at my question. "No, why did you ask that rob?"
"Well, look at me Wilson, I've been doing nothing but sorting documents for the past 12 hours, I can't even pee without asking my boss from the chat, and what's the point anyway? He could reply after 6 or 8 hours who knows?" I kept typing mindlessly, sometimes I feel that Wilson is more alive than I am. I mean look at that smile that he has!
"I'm twenty-three years old, so young already throwing my life away to work. My father and mother both are both dead, not that I know of them since they abandoned me before I can even talk.
I am in a true sense what you would call a 'mediocrity', I have no talent, average grades, barely passable face, and a pathetic height of 5,5 ft.
Although I'm aware of others suffering more than I am doesn't it just goes to show how cruel this world is? Some people say because this world is unfair to everyone it's 'fair' to everyone, bullshit. Ask the kids starving in the street what would they think about the kids who grew up in silicon valley. They'd stab you if you say the rich kids suffer just as much as them.
In reality the world is simply unfair, not fair at all. The reason why some people say it's unfair to everyone is because not everyone can appreciate what they have already, if they do you would realize how cruel this world we live in is.
Why should I work like a slave and others die in the street when there's some people who can eat meat everyday yet complains about miniscule things? It's Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! Unfair! UNFAIR! UNFAIR!"
Out of anger I slammed my keyboard into screwed pieces while angrily gritting my teeth, I turn to look at Wilson my dear old friend.
For some reason I can feel a drop of sweat fall onto the desk beneath Wilson, his crooked smile shaking more and more.
"Wilson... Say something."
I reach forward grabbing Wilson by his side and looked deep into his eyes, I could see my own face reflection from his body.
My hair a mess with my hairline clearly pushed, an unshaved beard, and a pair of clear dead eyes.
Out of anger I SMASHED Wilson into my screen blood oozing from the corner of my mouth veins popping across my face.
"Uhh.. Robert? W-what's going O-on?" A female coworker, Lisa carefully approached me from behind, at that point I wanted nothing to do with he. as I turn around I could feel how she looks at me, horror.
"Lis-"
"I'lltellthebossyoursickdon'tworrypleasedon'thurtmebye-"
'what the hell am I doing?'
I, defeated sat down again my posture low unable to put out any kind of will again.
Just then, a sound so impossible to hear yet I clearly heard it, a.. honking?
Beep!
'huh.. what's that sound?'
Beep!
'it sounds so familiar.. it sounds.. it sounds like a—
BEEEEP!!
"—TRUCK!?"
A truck smashed through the side of the building its menacing head lights staring down at me.
"Isekai time bitch!"
"WAIT NO-"
The truck grew arms out of nowhere like an autobot and with a perfect precision it punch a large hole through my stomach making my body a donut.
A pain so overwhelming shot up, so intense I died instantly unable to put up any quippy remarks about my death, a quick and pathetic death by a sentient truck.
I died.
———
I woke up again.
In some novels the protagonist would describe it as a "splitting headache" or "peace."
For me?
I felt nothing.
Not even my own body. Strangely enough, I could still stand up and walk just fine without it, as if I had never lost my limbs.
Where the hell am I? Is this purgatory?
I expected to be sent to hell, but now that I think about it, that truck earlier should be a telltale sign that I'm either going to enjoy a plethora of harems with overpowered bullshit abilities…
…or be turned into a femboy with a slut system for the entertainment of some god or random OP being.
Oh well. At least no more work.
Looking around, I somehow sensed a light at the end of the darkness, so I followed it without knowing where it would lead.
My last hope is that this isn't some torture program made by the government.
As I crossed the light, I saw a figure in the distance standing in a patch of grass. His stance was benevolent, like his soul. His presence was captivating, as it should be.
Is that…
[Ah, you're awake, Robert.]
"John 1000?!"
[That's right, Robert. I'm here to send you to another world on behalf of R.O.B.]
"W-wait, hold on why you then? Not a god or system, but you?!"
[You see, Robert, after I soloed the entirety of fiction, R.O.B gave me one last request: to help him bring another unfortunate soul to reincarnation. So I decided to honor his last wish… which brings me to you, Robbert.]
Hearing John 1000's words made me dizzy. Not from the absurdity… but from the thought of a second chance.
To live.
To be happy.
To be… free.
[So, what do you say, Robert? Ready to spin the wheel?]
"Yes, I'm ready, John!"
A wheel of fate literally appeared in front of me. Despite its limited spaces, it seemed to hold a limitless number of worlds.
[Spin it, Robert.]
John spoke while confidently crossing his arms.
"Alright… here we go…"
With nervous determination, I spun the wheel.
As it blurred, I could feel drops of nonexistent sweat falling from my face.
As it slowed, countless worlds flashed past:
Bleach…
One Punch Man…
Marvel…
My Hero Academia…
Naruto…
Re:Zero…
Cyberpunk…
and… Warhammer…
Just kidding.
The needle landed on:
Jujutsu Kaisen
[Alright, Robert. Seems like you're pretty lucky.]
As John spoke, I felt my body — no, my soul dissolving into light.
Now that my mind was clearer, the absurdity of today finally caught up to me. Although I was thankful, I was even more confused as to how or why John 1000 was standing in front of me.
Am I in a fanfic or what?
I could clearly remember the rage I felt earlier.
At myself.
At the world.
For all its wrongdoings, no.
The world did nothing.
It was humans who tortured their own kind.
My rage began to re-emerge.
And as the last pieces of my soul dissolved, there was only one thought left in my mind.
Slaughter everything.
[Ah, remember, Robert.]
Before leaving, John turned around one last time.
[Keep it 1000.]
---
A/N: I definitely wrote this while high