CHAPTER 57 — THE YES I COULDN'T SAY
Kiefer's POV
I drove back to Watson Mansion without saying a single word.
I don't remember the road.
I don't remember the traffic.
I don't remember how long I sat inside the car before finally getting out.
All I could hear was one word.
No.
Her voice kept replaying in my head.
I'm sorry.
I can't.
No.
I walked into the mansion.
The lights were still on.
Someone was waiting in the living room.
"Kiefer?"
I stopped.
Kegan looked up at me.
He had been waiting.
"Where were you?"
I didn't answer.
He studied my face.
"What happened?"
I looked at him.
I wanted to tell him.
I wanted to tell someone.
But how could I explain it?
How could I say that I had finally asked the woman I loved to spend the rest of her life with me...
and she had said no?
My lips parted.
Nothing came out.
"Kiefer?"
I looked away.
Kegan stood up.
"Are you okay?"
I nodded.
It was a lie.
A terrible one.
I walked past him.
"Kiefer—"
I stopped for a second.
But I didn't turn around.
"I just need to be alone."
My voice barely came out.
Then I walked upstairs.
I closed my bedroom door.
And finally...
I let myself sit down.
The ring was still in my hand.
I stared at it.
For a long time.
---
Jay's POV
I couldn't go to Fernandez Mansion.
Not tonight.
So I went home.
I went to my mansion.
The moment I entered, everything felt strangely quiet.
I took off my shoes and left them near the door.
I didn't bother turning on all the lights.
I just walked through the darkness.
My footsteps echoed through the halls.
Then I remembered Tita Serena.
I quietly went upstairs.
Her door was closed.
I opened it just enough to look inside.
She was sleeping.
Peacefully.
I smiled faintly.
At least someone could sleep tonight.
I closed the door again.
Then I went downstairs.
Straight to the minibar.
I stood there for a moment.
I stared at the bottles.
Then I laughed.
"Look at me."
I shook my head.
"What a mess."
I poured myself a drink.
The glass trembled slightly in my hand.
I noticed it.
Then laughed again.
"Really?"
I took a sip.
The alcohol burned my throat.
I leaned against the counter.
My eyes closed.
And immediately, I saw him.
Kiefer.
On one knee.
Holding the ring.
Looking at me like I was the only person in the world.
My eyes opened.
I poured another drink.
"I hate you."
I whispered.
Then I laughed.
"I don't."
I stared at the glass.
"I hate myself."
I took another sip.
Because the truth was simple.
I wanted to say yes.
God, I wanted to say yes.
I wanted to take his hand.
I wanted to put that ring on my finger.
I wanted to hear him tell everyone that I was going to be his wife.
I wanted that future.
I wanted him.
But I couldn't.
Not now.
Not when I knew what was coming.
The fire was getting closer.
The war I'd been preparing for wasn't something Kiefer could simply walk into and survive because he loved me.
There were enemies.
There were people who would use him against me.
And if Kiefer stood beside me when everything started...
he would become a target.
My target.
My weakness.
My greatest vulnerability.
I couldn't allow that.
I couldn't watch him get hurt because of me.
I couldn't stand there one day and realize that the reason he was bleeding was because I had asked him to stay.
So I rejected him.
Not because I didn't love him.
Because I loved him too much.
I looked down at the glass.
"You don't understand, Kiefer."
My voice cracked.
"If you stay with me..."
I swallowed.
"...you'll get dragged into everything."
I closed my eyes.
"And I can't let that happen."
I laughed bitterly.
"So I broke your heart instead."
Another sip.
"Smart choice, Jay."
I looked at myself in the mirror behind the minibar.
"You protected him."
I smiled.
But it didn't reach my eyes.
"That's what you wanted, right?"
Silence.
Then I whispered—
"Then why does it hurt so much?"
I placed the glass down.
My hands were shaking.
I looked toward the stairs.
Tita Serena was still asleep.
She didn't know.
She didn't know that her son had just asked me to marry him.
She didn't know that I had said no.
And she definitely didn't know why.
I picked up the glass again.
"I'll keep him safe."
My voice was barely audible.
"Even if he hates me."
I took another drink.
"Even if he never forgives me."
A tear escaped.
I wiped it away immediately.
"No."
I laughed softly.
"Not tonight."
I poured another drink.
"Tonight, I'm fine."
I raised the glass.
"To protecting the people you love."
I smiled bitterly.
"Even when they don't know you're doing it."
I took the drink.
And for the first time since I had walked out of that restaurant...
I allowed myself to think about the possibility that I might never get another chance with him.
That thought hurt more than anything else.
I closed my eyes.
"I'm sorry, Kiefer."
---
Kiefer's POV
I was still sitting on the edge of my bed.
The ring was beside me.
I picked it up again.
Why?
Why did she say no?
I knew Jay.
She wasn't someone who made decisions without a reason.
There was something she wasn't telling me.
Something she was hiding.
I stared at the ring.
Maybe she didn't love me anymore.
The thought made my chest tighten.
I immediately pushed it away.
No.
I couldn't believe that.
Because I'd seen her eyes.
She had been crying.
She had looked like saying no hurt her just as much as it hurt me.
So why?
I didn't have an answer.
And for tonight...
I wasn't going to force one.
I placed the ring back inside the box.
Then closed it.
I whispered to the empty room—
"Goodnight, Jay."
---
Author's Note 🖤
I'm sorry, guys. 😭
I KNOW.
It's been almost 22 days since I last posted, and I'm really, really sorry for disappearing like that.
I know this chapter is also a little shorter than my usual chapters, but I honestly didn't want to keep you waiting even longer.
My exams are coming up, so things have been a little messy and I've been struggling to balance everything.
Please don't hate me. 😭🖤
And about this chapter...
JAY DID NOT SAY NO BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T LOVE KIEFER.
She said no because she knows what's coming.
The fire is coming.
And Jay knows that if Kiefer stays beside her, he could get caught in the crossfire.
She would rather have him hate her than lose him.
And Kiefer?
He has absolutely no idea why she rejected him.
👀
I'm not saying anything else.
Thank you for waiting for me for these 22 days.
I love you guys so much. 🖤
See you in the next chapter. 🫶