Japan. Church.
Tuesday. 7:00 PM.
After the group entered the circle, they immediately found themselves in some kind of church. There were guts everywhere, Issa and Asya were wounded, and there was an old man with a revolver. It sounded like the beginning of a good joke.
"Hey, we're here to help," said Kiba.
"Well, well, we have a problem here," confirmed Akeno.
"An exorcist," Koneko stated.
"Nice revolver, Father," Dodge remarked, looking around.
"Thanks, your guts will look just as good on the cross! Well, since you're all here, could you all go to...
"Sorry, but he's our friend and we won't leave without him," Kiba interrupted, pointing at Issei.
"Oh, how sweet! I like that! So what? You're 'on top' and he's 'on the bottom'?
"I didn't expect to hear such rot from a priest.
"And you are a demon of the highest rank!" he said to Rias. "Hunting you is my life's goal! Stand still, and I'll kill you one by one.
"I don't think I can physically do that," muttered Dodge, remembering the meaning of the phrase "stand still."
"We'll see who kills whom," Akeno snapped.
"Oh, such passion! Is that love or ferocity in your eyes? I love exchanging fierce glances—I can't resist!
"Let me help you," Rias began, "my dear slave, you seem to have had your fun with him," she said to Issa, who had apparently hurt the priest a little.
"Of course, of course, I had fun with him from the bottom of my heart, and you?" the exorcist muttered something.
"Are you okay, Issa?" the clan heiress asked.
"I'm sorry, you warned me about him, and I broke my promise again..." groaned the hero, clutching his wounded side.
"You're badly hurt... I'm sorry. I couldn't even imagine that an exorcist scum would show up here... the barrier didn't let me know.
"Got it, you stupid bitch?! Your filthy job was to maintain the barrier!" the exorcist cursed, slapping the corpse...
"Ah, so it's not a corpse. Damn, it would have been weird if he had hit a corpse and accused it of not maintaining the barrier."
"Asya!" Issa cried out in a weakened voice.
"There is no forgiveness for those who raise a hand against my servant, especially vulgar scum like you. And you, you beast, beating your own assistants. My anger knows no bounds," Gremory informed them.
"Do these words really scare anyone?"
"A fallen angel is nearby," said Koneko.
"He's been here for a long time," yawned Dodge.
"Fasten your seatbelts! The fallen angel is approaching!" the old man yelled.
"The president?
"Right now, the most important thing is to take care of Issa. Akeno, get ready to jump.
"Yes, sir.
"Koneko, I trust Issa to you.
"Understood.
"Filthy demons! You won't escape!" shouted the old man.
"President! Let's take Asia with us!" Issa shouted, bleeding slightly.
"Impossible. Only members of my clan can use this circle.
"No... Asya! Let her go! I have to save Asya! Let me go! Asya!
"Issay... I promise... someday... we'll meet again," a quiet voice whispered. Asia lay on the floor, struggling to speak.
"Asya!"
Akeno, Koneko, and Issei disappeared in a flash. Only Kiba, Dodge, and Rias remained.
"You'll burn in hell!" Rias exploded.
"Well, shall we dance?" Kiba drew his swords.
"I hope I get paid for this," Dodge took up a fighting stance.
"One at a time, you sons of bitches, one at a time," the exorcist smiled.The revolver wasn't a six-shooter. It fired light.
"Lady, be careful!" the horse shouted, jumping behind cover.
"Don't worry about me!" she replied, creating a magical shield.
The demons successfully withstood the priest's attack.
"What are you doing, cooling off?" asked the old man, pointing the barrel at Dodge.
"Make me sweat," sighed the trickster, raising his head.
Miss, miss, another miss. After firing about ten light bullets at him, the old man ran out of ammunition.
"He's not immortal after all."
Sticking their heads out, Rias was the first to fire a ball at the holy man. Deflecting the ball with his sword, the exorcist continued to reload his revolver.
"Kiba!"
The blond was already ready to strike, but trouble awaited him.
"This is my servant, the fallen angel Mittel.
If Kiba hadn't stepped back, his head would have been pierced by a spear of light. It would have been an unpleasant sight.
"Dodge! Do something!
"What exactly?
"What do you mean, 'what exactly'?! Go and kill them!
"Alright, alright, I'll go hit someone.
He lunged at the old man, headbutted him, and now the revolver was in Dodge's hands.
"Damn, that's a cool thing," Lover nodded approvingly, twirling the gun on his finger like in the Westerns.
"I sense the fallen approaching! Form a circle! Quickly!" Rias shouted.
"Hey, can you lend me some bullets...
"DODGER!
"Coming, coming...
Dodge moved quickly towards Rias and waved his hand at the exorcist. The trio vanished into the hellish circle.
"Son of a bitch, he took my gun. Where am I going to find such an antique now?" grumbled the old man, holding his broken nose.
"Don't worry, we'll find a new one," his fallen daughter reassured him, stroking his head.
The trio reformed in the club.
"You shouldn't have gone anywhere," Dodge grumbled, taking his place on the sofa.
"Ise, are you okay?" Rias asked, worried when she saw the wounded man.
"Not great, ma'am.
"Come with me, we need to cure you of the holy poison.
And they left. Pulling out his revolver and twirling it around his finger, Dodge noticed a strange loading system. The thing was, there was no cylinder. So was it magical?"
"What will they think of next?" muttered Dodge.
"Where did you get that?" Akeno asked in surprise.
"I took it from the old man.
"How did you manage that?
"I just walked up and took it, what's so difficult about that? By the way, does anyone here know the language of the fallen angels?
"Why?" Kiba asked excitedly.
"Well, I have a text here...
A crumpled piece of paper flew into Kiba's hands. Opening it, he read:
On Wednesday. At the peak of Holy Mountain. In the evening.
"Holy Mountain? We'll need to find a map...
"Where did you get this? Only the fallen write in the fallen language.
"Guess.
"A fallen angel gave it to you.
"I could clap. But sorry, my hands are full," said Dodge, showing his useless revolver.
"Is he strong?
"It's 'she'. And no, she's not strong. And what do I care? Am I going to fight her?
"Well, you're not going on a date, are you?" Kiba smiled.
"Listen, thanks for your help, but now please leave me alone.
"Alright, alright.
Isei and Rias appeared. The schoolboy had a pale wound on his shoulder.
"This time, the treatment will take much longer than usual," said Akeno, bandaging the wound.
"That stray exorcist is incredibly strong," Rias said as she headed for the shower.
"Stray, you say... I thought that only applied to demons," said Issei.
"Many of the Fallen Angels' slaves are exiled servants of the Church.
"Then, Asya is also a lost exorcist?"
"It doesn't matter, you're a demon, and she's a servant of a fallen angel.
Getting up from the sofa, Dodge shuffled over to the vending machine. Slipping on a can, he deftly landed on his hands.
"Who scattered the cans around here...?" he wondered aloud, to general laughter. He looked, shall we say, amusing.
"Did you used to work in a circus?" someone sneered.
***
School. Occult Club.
Wednesday. 2:00 PM
Today, Dodge decided to get up early. After all, he had a business meeting.
"Probably."
He spent the whole night thinking up possible scenarios. None of them seemed plausible.
"She'll turn into a dragon and eat me, someone will turn into a frog and eat her..."
In general, he had never been particularly good at imagining things. Even though he had seen many wonderful things in his life. Just look at that pyramid...
"How did they even build it?"
In any case, something was happening today. Getting up from the sofa, he headed straight for the vending machine. And there he was unpleasantly surprised.
"Two cans a day. No more. We'll talk about it later. Rias."
To say he didn't care would be an understatement. The first can, then the second, then the third...
The third didn't work; the pentagram on the floor activated and Dodge was almost electrocuted. Jumping up just in time, he avoided injury.
"We'll talk about it. We'll definitely talk about it," he thought viciously and indifferently.
He downed one in one gulp and put the second one in his jeans pocket. By the way, he hadn't fallen once yet.
"Someone cleaned up my trash? How nice of them."
Stepping outside, he noticed a bunch of schoolchildren who were apparently out for recess. Scratching his head, he headed for the exit.
"Hey, Dodge!" he heard a familiar blond voice call out.Kiba, surrounded by schoolgirls, was waving him over.
"What do you want?
"Girls, excuse me..." he said, passing by his female fans, "listen, I need to talk to you.
"What?
"Can you take this to the right locker?" he asked, showing her the envelope in his sleeve.
"Do I look like a love letter carrier?
"It's not a love letter!
"No one else?
"Yes, everyone here is nosy. And you definitely won't open the envelope.
"Maybe you're right.
"So what?
"You'll owe me, but his debt has been paid long ago.
"Okay. First floor, locker 163. You'll have to figure out the lock yourself.
"Of course.
It was Dodge's first time in the school building. And he immediately had to remember a few things.
Don't get caught by Rias, the teachers, or other unpleasant individuals. Dodge doesn't wear a school uniform, so it's best to keep a low profile.
A security guard stood watch over the school. He was old. Everything about him said he was only there for the young legs and big boobs.
"You're all sick here."
Waiting for the moment when the old man was distracted by another skirt that had accidentally blown up in the wind, Dodge slipped past.
Inside, there were a few students sitting on benches and staring at some black boxes. Maybe it was a new form of zombification?"
"There used to be many ways to dumb down humanity. Apparently, this is one of them."
No one paid much attention to him. Finding a map of the building, he went to the lockers. He didn't meet anyone special...
Sensing trouble, he quickly sat down next to two boys looking at a magazine.
"Matsuda, look at these sizes!
"Yeah...
They didn't even notice him.
A girl with glasses came around the corner. Magic. Magic again.
"It seems like there are more special people here than ordinary ones."
She glanced at the people sitting on the bench. She took a few more steps and suddenly stopped.
"Who's that?" Sona thought, turning around.
Turning around, she saw only two perverts looking at a magazine. But Sona, unfortunately, always trusted her instincts and didn't ignore this moment.
Meanwhile, Dodge was already busy with the lock. Fortunately, there was no one around. It took him about six seconds to open the coveted door. Inside, it was empty. It felt strange. He threw the letter into the locker, closed it, and was about to leave...
"Stop!" Sona shouted, suddenly coming out from around the corner.
But there was no one left to stand. The hallway was empty.
"I can't be paranoid, can I?" muttered the brunette as Dodge quietly moved towards the exit behind her.
"What the hell..." thought Dodge when he saw another girl moving towards him.
"Young man, why aren't you in uniform?" the girl finally noticed him.
"The dog ate it," Dodge muttered, waiting. There was an obstacle in front of him and behind him. "Oh, are those pretty boys kissing?" Lovkač played along sincerely.
"What? Where?" the girl turned around.
But no one was kissing.
"Are you okay?" Sona asked, approaching her subordinate a couple of seconds later. "Who's not in uniform?"
"Um... he was just here!" the duty officer mumbled guiltily, looking around 360 degrees.
Dodge was already leaving the school when the bell rang. Spitting, he moved towards the exit.
"What were you doing at school?" Rias appeared out of nowhere.
"Not her, not now."
"... — nothing came to mind.
"I'll repeat my question..." she said, when suddenly a magazine flew into her hands. Surprised, Rias blinked. "Gul? Where did you get that? Hey, where are you?"
In general, Dodge had had very bad experiences with girls. As a rule, more than half of them wanted to kill him. The rest wanted to use him to get something.
"Just like men, though."
That's why he was now sitting by the fountain, unwilling to part with his hard-earned money. He could wait a day and drink two cans, or he could spend his money and drink as much as he wanted. Of course, Dodge wasn't addicted to Meiser...
"Come on, you stupid machine, suck up that damn piece of paper.
...but who's going to tell him what to do? Let him decide for himself what and when to drink. Relaxing on the bench, he fell into a state of prostration for a while.
Until his smooth musings were interrupted by voices. Familiar voices.
"That's the wound, isn't it?" It was apparently the nun.
"Y-yes..." Issei confirmed as Asya began to treat the scar on his shoulder.
Dodge wanted to stay on the bench and do nothing, but something kept nagging at him. Deciding to hide behind the bench, he continued to sip his drink slowly.
"Does your leg hurt too?"
"Y-yes.
"How are you feeling?" Asya asked, running her hand over the scars.
"Um... wow, the pain's gone! And my leg's fine! Cool! Cool, Asya!
"When I was a baby, I was abandoned at the door of a small village church in Europe. Someone heard me crying and took me in. When I was eight, a wounded puppy wandered into the church. I prayed for him all night, and in the morning a miracle happened. After that, I was taken to a big church. Sick people came from all over the world and asked me to pray for them. I was so happy that I could help people. But one day, I met a wounded boy and healed him. Unfortunately, I wasn't allowed to do that... They said, 'Anyone who heals demons is a heretic.
"Hate those who wish good to everyone in need? Heh, just like in the Middle Ages, I swear."
"So that's how you ran away from home and started serving the fallen...
"I will never forget how happy I was when I prayed to the Lord God. I admit that there are those who do evil, but the Lord God sees everything. And someday my dream will come true, because I only do good. I sincerely believe that. What is my dream? To have lots of friends and grow flowers, buy books and discuss them at night. That is my dream, because I have no friends.
"I'll be your friend, Asya. Actually, we're already friends, aren't we? I mean, we played and talked together, even if there were no books or flowers, but... that doesn't count, does it?" he smiled.
"No... no! No! No! But Issei, I don't want to burden you.
"Demon or not, it doesn't matter. Friendship is friendship!
"I'm so... so... happy!"
"The only thing missing here is a happy ending. Unfortunately, in the real world, that rarely happens," Dodge thought gloomily. And not without reason.
The tip of someone's heel touched the water's surface, causing faint ripples.
"This can't be happening," said a familiar voice.
"Hmm, has she come to kill him a second time?"
"Yuma?" the pervert asked in surprise.
"Lady Rainale.
"Are you a fallen angel? I knew it...
"It took you long enough to figure it out."
"I never thought you'd actually be with that disgusting demon. Asya, you can't escape me.
"No way! I'll never go back to a place where I have no one to talk to! I'm sorry. To be honest, I ran away from the church...
"I figured that out a long time ago. With scum like that, you'll never be free. What do you want, fallen angel?
"You, a pet of a failed demon, watch your tone. But since you're here... Spear of Light! I want to see you die for real.
"Holy Mechanism!" — a moment of silence. — It worked!
"At first I was worried, but it's just Double Krit," the fallen angel sneered.
"Double?
"It's called the 'Dragon's Hand'. It temporarily increases your strength.
"Increases strength...
"This Holy Mechanism isn't that dangerous. They explained everything clearly upstairs — so I was worried for nothing... 'I love you. Let's meet up!' Yes, that's right, you were on the brink of death then.
"Shut up! Enough!
"This toy is nothing against me. Be a good boy and let me take Asia home.
"I won't let you!
"Iseya.
"What kind of person am I if I can't save my own friend? Let's go! So it increases strength?
"I'm increasing it!"
"The gloves can talk now? Cool."
"I can feel the power surging!" the boy exclaimed happily.
The spear flew slowly towards Issey, while Dodge wondered what to do in this situation. He had plenty of time.
"He's nobody to me, just like I'm nobody to him. Would he protect me? Most likely, yes. Would he die because of it? Yes. Well, I don't want to be a hero, but it would be wrong to just stand by and watch... All right, I'll make an exception..."
The spear failed to hit Issa, as it was knocked off course by Dodge. This was the second time he had protected him for free.
"Dodge!
"Hello to you too.
"Who are you? Argh, never mind! Asya, come with me, and I'll save your stupid demon's life.
"Go to hell! Who would believe this nonsense? Asya, watch out!" Issa shouted as the fallen woman swung her spear to strike.
"She's not going to throw it, she wants to hit him..."
Dojou was lucky; he jumped out of the way just in time and avoided the blast wave. Issei flew high into the air and landed right in a fountain.
"I missed this time, but next time I'll tear you to pieces, guys," smiled the fallen woman, seeing the battered Issei and the lying Dojo.
"I tripped over a rock while somersaulting. Damn, only I could be so clumsy."
"I obey you," said Asya, seeing that the situation was not in their favour.
"Good girl. After today's ceremony, all the pain and suffering will be over. Bye, Issey," the fallen girl teased, hugging Asya and disappearing.
"No, Asya! Dodge, do something! Damn it, why am I so weak?!"
Issay was seriously depressed, blaming himself for all the misfortunes. Dodge guessed that very soon this boy and his whole company would go to that very church and fight back against all the villains.
"Well, shall we go to the club?" asked Lovkach, shaking himself off.
"To the club... are you okay?"
"I'm fine.
"How did you end up here?
"Fate brought me here... By the way, I don't believe in fate. I don't recommend it to you either.
***
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