While Marvel Qi was pondering how to reasonably close his shop and grumbling about why the two pillars of support Phoenix Mother and Professor couldn't be fooled as easily as Wolverine or Cyclops, a "beautiful" figure caught his eye, interrupting his indulgent thoughts.
She pushed open the shop door and rushed to the counter, excitement lighting up her face. "Wanna go on a date?"
Huh? Is this… an invitation from an ancient deity?!
Marvel Qi froze, staring blankly at the girl before him. She was an "Ancient God Girl," wearing a pale pink knitted hat, chestnut hair cut to her chin, canvas sneakers, blue jeans, and a deep pink T-shirt emblazoned with an ancient god emblem.
Without hesitation, he firmly refused, "Sorry, I have to decline."
At that moment, a delayed but muscular blonde "succubus" happened to overhear his rejection.
He scowled, "Hey, Meg, if you harass this gentleman again, I'll tell Dad!"
"Believe me, to win the go-kart race Grandpa organized against that Wall Street vampire, he will teach you a lesson you won't forget!"
"Oh no! Chris, don't do that!"
The bespectacled "Ancient God" girl wailed and immediately retreated behind the succubus Chris.
Clearly, even her father the "big newborn" was deeply feared by Meg, who possessed an Ancient God's body.
Peter, you really are that big newborn!
Marvel Qi couldn't help but sigh. He recognized these two remarkable figures and their lineage.
They came from "Rick and… Simpson… Family Matters" (well, it's an episodic reference), and their biological child the big newborn Peter was someone he had just thought of.
As for why they came to him, Marvel Qi roughly guessed from their conversation.
It was simply because the original God of War had helped that financial vampire Mr. Lumis defeat the big newborn Peter. So Peter had found a way to study Marvel Qi, hoping to upgrade his own car.
As expected, just as Marvel Qi had predicted!
Chris, usually reasonable and communicative, told Marvel Qi the story as he assumed it to be.
Only one detail differed slightly.
When Marvel Qi, curious and determined, asked Mr. Lumis to be completely honest, the real "succubus," who specialized in pestering old men, began dodging the question.
Finally, Marvel Qi realized that if he didn't provide a reasonable explanation, Meg's infatuation would make her voluntarily back off.
Chris hurried to reconcile, "Dad took Mr. Cleveland, Director Joe, and Ah Q to the bar, along with that… cough, vampire gentleman. They hit it off immediately, so he asked Meg and me to run errands for them."
Hmm, "hit it off," bar, and Ah Q as grammatical context… Mr. Lumis, you really suffered!
Marvel Qi didn't believe this explanation for a second.
But it didn't concern him.
After all, a financial vampire who only did business with him wasn't worth the risk and wasn't worth pushing away a customer.
Even so…
Seeing Meg so mesmerized by her "Ancient God body," Marvel Qi resolutely decided: Even if the customer is a little annoying, a little godlike… I'll take the order!
So he skipped Chris's "American succubus" rambling and solemnly agreed, "Ah, really? Then I'm sure Mr. Lumis had a lot of fun drinking!"
The "victims" Chris and Meg had no response but to smile awkwardly, "Yeah… yeah…"
Meanwhile, in a back alley of the bar, a naked, greasy middle-aged man limped around, rummaging through trash for clothes that had been ripped and discarded before his… hemorrhoids. Somehow, he still remembered them.
Skipping over Mr. Lumis's sudden pity, Marvel Qi looked at the "crouching dragon and newly born phoenix" before him and said, "I say, Mr. Lumis spent thousands of dollars upgrading his original God of War!"
"You two… only gave me a few bucks?!"
He eyed them suspiciously. "Are you really that big… fat Mr. Peter?"
"Don't lie to me. I received news that Mr. Lumis, Peter, is the son-in-law of tycoon Mr. Carter!"
"And yet, with such a grandfather, you're only willing to pay me… a few bucks?!"
Finally, Marvel Qi's acting flared. Ignoring the 1960s value of money, he solemnly asked, "Are you two really financial vampires?"
"The way you exploit labor is even more cruel than what Mr. Lumis did on Wall Street!"
The siblings, bullied daily by the big newborn, couldn't resist his posture.
They immediately knelt.
Chris complained bitterly, "We all pooled our money to win this race. Mom even borrowed the leftover cash from Grandma, totaling $5,000."
"But that big… I mean Dad… he burned down a Wall Street high-end bar to drink and is now in custody, waiting for Grandpa to bail him out!"
"As for the $5,000 we collected, the bar staff confiscated it all."
"The only reason any of it survived is because I had the idea to stash it in Meg's storage space."
"Wait!!"
Hearing this shocking revelation, Marvel Qi dropped the money soaked with "Ancient God power" and exclaimed, "You didn't tell me there was such a huge incident just now?!"
"Were you trying to kill me for money?!"
Despite this, Marvel Qi, now a dimensional god a young mini-version used a very displeased tone to drive them away: "Go, go, go! I'm not stealing your business!"
His expression was so convincing that the siblings immediately believed him.
They begged, "Don't be like that! Kind boss, you look so handsome, you must also be kind."
"Help us!"
Swatting away Meg's hand trying to take advantage, Marvel Qi said sternly, "Stop. While most of what you said is correct, I am indeed kind, handsome, and good-hearted."
"I embody all beautiful virtues."
"If I were placed in the early years of the Common Era, I would be a stock with great potential, vying with Jesus' brothers for the position of the divine child."
"But…"
His tone changed, "That doesn't mean I'm some holy pushover or soft target, okay?"
"My character is on par with Jesus' brothers, but that doesn't obligate me to help you in any way!"
"And!"
Finally, with solemnity and anger, Marvel Qi scolded, "I am kind-hearted, but I am not a soft-hearted pushover! Delete the word 'heart' you jerk!"
Spit splattered on Chris, who was stunned. He had to grab a tissue from the shop to wipe it, apologizing as he went, "Sorry, sorry, shopkeeper, please calm down!"
Meg, meanwhile, seemed perversely thrilled, as if the spit was a reward.
Marvel Qi was shocked!
Though he liked watching beautiful women enjoy themselves, that didn't mean he could tolerate a "quasi-ancient god" acting like this toward him.
He wasn't that perverse or shameless!
Perhaps his brother Mephisto had such eclectic tastes…
But now, Marvel Qi, a roadside nobody, still 18,000 miles away from the multiversal level, was not worthy of appreciating this "ancient godly beauty."
Therefore!
With a loud thud, the door slammed shut, and Chris and Meg were thrown outside by Marvel Qi.
Plopping onto the cold ground, Chris's face showed "it's over," moaning, "What do we do? What do we do? Meg, that big newborn Peter will surely kill us!"
But kind-hearted Meg was lost in her fantasy, ignoring her chubby brother.
Until…
"Relax relax relax!"
After several slaps, Meg's face swelled, finally tearing her attention away from the spit marks left by Marvel Qi.
She transformed all her fantasies of marrying a handsome man into the impulse to beat Chris.
"Chris!!!"
With a roar, the "Ancient God" mounted the "succubus," swaying left and right until Chris's head looked like a pig's.
A cool breeze blew. The siblings crouched near a park, stupidly eating crab roe burgers. They bought the burgers with the money saved from Meg's storage, from a redneck fat uncle claiming to be the "Crab Boss."
And they tasted amazing!
Far better than the burgers they had in Quahog.
The redneck fat uncle's confidence had been worth it.
(Redneck Fat Uncle: My crab roe burgers are the best, tastiest burgers in all of New York!)
As they finished, each holding a "pig head," sad and displeased, they stared at each other silently.
After a while, Meg finally spoke, "Chris, why don't you… talk to Herbert and see if he'd lend us some money?"
"No! Meg, you're delusional! I'm never going near that old man!"
Chris's irritation spiked. He threw the burger wrapper to the ground, angrily, "Then leave if you want!"
"I definitely won't go!!!"
Seeing Chris so firm, Meg looked worried and helpless, "It's not that I can't, it's that… that old man only likes you!"
The siblings stared at each other in silence again.
They hugged and cried.
Because they knew, if they messed up, the newborn wouldn't consider excuses; he'd vent his anger on them in a minute!
But they had tried their best!
They were just students, bullied failures. Could they really turn the clubhouse upside down?
Wait! Didn't the shopkeeper say…?
Suddenly, Chris had an idea and whispered to Meg, "Meg, remember that phrase?"
"What phrase?"
Meg looked blank.
"That phrase!"
Chris said urgently, "He seemed to say a name in that dumpling phrase!"
"Dumpling…?"
Meg's eyes lit up as she nodded, "Yes, yes, Chris, you're right. My idol did mention Dumpling. Maybe the turning point lies with that kid!"
Chris directed, "Time's short. I'll go borrow money from Lois, Dumpling, you stay here and keep watch!"
"No problem!!"
After dividing tasks, Chris wiggled his fat, large butt and rushed to the nearby bus stop.
He had to reach their family's hotel before Lois's lunch break ended.
Otherwise, once the time passed, Lois would take Dumpling out for a walk!
(White Dog Brian: Woof, I'm being taken for a walk by Lois, yay!!)
Meanwhile, behind the first-floor counter at the Mickey Mouse Club, Marvel Qi used his mechanical heart to release three mechanical birds to track them. Using their built-in cameras, he watched everything, and once they reacted, he breathed a sigh of relief. Finally, these two dumb siblings figured it out; not easy at all!!
Then, as Marvel Qi's attention was drawn to the mechanical birds, he followed Chris to the hotel, avoiding any complications, while the remaining birds continued monitoring infatuated Meg.
All of this was for matters Marvel Qi had predicted would be extremely challenging.
But over time, this young version of Marvel Qi, with the four miraculous powers and multiverse-level bloodline, already in the Hell dimension, was no longer the weak Delta he had once been.