Four days have passed since the engagement party. I'm getting ready for my "swimming lessons" with Serkan. I don't know why, but I'm excited; I'm even doing my hair in a braid and I chose a rather daring swimsuit. When I see his call on my phone, I can't help but smile.
"Hello? I see someone is quite excited to give me swimming lessons."
"Hande, what on earth did you tell Selim?" I pull the phone away for a second. Here he goes. "Did you say we were moving in together? Seriously, Hande, do you not think before you speak?"
"Look here, Serkan, cut the rudeness! She was bragging, provoking me... I ended up saying that just to hit her where it hurts. I just didn't expect her to spread it to these proportions!"
My aunt Jansu comes running into the room, her eyes wide. "You're moving out?!"
"Great, you impulsive genius. What are you going to say now?" Serkan grumbles on the line.
"Serkan, one minute!" He is insufferable when he's right. "Auntie, it's not exactly like that..."
"Are you moving out or not?"
"You are, yes," Serkan intervenes over the phone. "Otherwise, Selim will find the lie suspicious. She's coming here tomorrow."
"Auntie, I said that because... I got jealous of his ex! I'm not moving... I think. I don't know!" I'm dizzy with two people pressuring me at the same time.
"HANDE!" Both Serkan on the phone and my aunt in the room scream my name in unison.
"Who told you, Auntie?"
"Serkan's mother called me because Selim told her."
"Allah, Allah! You can't trust these gossipy people with anything!" I sigh and hang up the phone in Serkan's face without saying goodbye. I was in shock.
Serkan sends me a message right after: "Bring your things today and sleep here for a while. We'll pretend it's temporary. And hurry up, we have a swimming lesson." I stare at his profile picture, furious.
"You are impossible, irritating, snobbish, and arrogant!"
The phone rings again. It's him. "Hello?"
"Stop cursing me in your head and hurry up."
"How did you know?"
"You are a difficult person to read, Hande, but certain reactions I can already predict."
I smile. Allah, Allah, what is this I'm feeling? Why does my heart race every time I see his name on the screen? Forget it, Hande. Pack your bags and let's go to his house.
When I go down to leave on my motorcycle, Serkan is already waiting with the car. He gets out and takes my suitcase immediately.
"I thought I'd meet you there."
"I thought you'd need a car. Wow... your suitcase is quite light. Do you think Selim will believe you moved in with this?"
I cross my arms, trying to maintain my composure. "Everything necessary is in here."
"Right. Then let's go."
"Will there be time for you to give me the lesson?"
"Yes, yes. You'll still have your lesson today." I look at the road, hiding a victorious smile.
Arriving there, I leave the suitcases in the living room. I put on my daring swimsuit and head to the edge of the pool.
"So, shall we begin?" Serkan was still in the same formal clothes from before. "Aren't you going to change?"
"What? Did you think I was going to teach you?" Serkan laughs, and I suddenly feel ridiculous. "I hired a teacher for you."
I look at the man approaching. He is muscular, with black hair, brown eyes, and tall. I smile. If Serkan wants to play this way, I know how to play too.
"Merhaba, I'm Hande Yıldız."
"Merhaba, I'm Tarik." We exchange smiling glances. Tarik gestures for us to get into the water.
"Tarik, you're not going to let go of me, right?" I ask, pretending to be afraid.
"Of course not."
"But seriously, Tarik..." I place my hand on his muscular arm, feeling Serkan's gaze burning into my back.
"Stretch your legs and start kicking," Tarik instructs. I pretend to be trying hard. "That's it, very well! Soon you won't need me anymore."
"Oh, Tarik, never! You are an excellent teacher."
I hear the sound of impatient footsteps. Serkan is at the edge of the pool, furious. "Hande, we have to go. Now."
"No, we don't. You said we were receiving guests, and until they arrive, I'm staying here."
"Hande! Come on, let's go!" He continues systematically, like a robot malfunctioning.
"You go."
Our eyes meet in a silent battle of wills. Finally, I give in. "Okay, fine."
I get out of the pool and start gathering my things. Serkan appears from behind and wraps me in a towel, embracing me from behind while drying me. I freeze in place. What is he doing? He turns me to face him, and his gaze is mild, almost sweet. We are so close that his perfume—that striking and intoxicating scent—seems to settle my soul and permeate my being.
"Thank you," I whisper, fleeing to the bathroom before I lose what's left of my mind.
I need to get ready and prepare the house as if I really lived there. My heart is racing. Maybe lying about not knowing how to swim has taken me into waters that are too deep. Living with Serkan has become an addictive mystery.
The dinner table is already perfectly set, thanks to Zeki.
"Are you ready, Serkan?" I ask, seeing him organizing folders and watches.
"I have to leave. I'm traveling for work."
"But we're receiving guests!" I stare at him, incredulous.
"Yes, and you will receive them."
"No!" He was already leaving, leaving me talking to myself. The attraction I felt minutes ago evaporates; now I only feel rage. "Serkan, it's a couple's dinner! You can't do this."
"I can and I will, Hande. Everyone will understand."
"Not if you want Selim back! How are you going to prove you've changed if you continue to be this work-focused robot?"
"I have more important matters," he says, crossing the pool patio.
I act on impulse to get his attention. I dive into the pool and stay at the bottom, holding my breath. In seconds, I hear the impact in the water. Serkan jumps in after me and pulls me to the surface. As soon as we emerge, I can't contain my laughter.
"What are you laughing at?!" Serkan pulls the hair away from my face, his eyes overflowing with concern.
"Do you really think I don't know how to swim?" His gaze changes from concern to absolute fury. I made a fool of him, and he knows it.
"I... I... Allah, Allah! Hande, you are insufferable! I am late!"
"Great! That way you stay here with your fiancée."
"And my folders fell in the water too!"
"I know you have copies. Robots always do."
"Truly, Hande, how can you be so..."
"What are you doing in the pool?" Serkan's mother's voice interrupts us. She is accompanied by Selim, Osman, and my aunt. They all stare at us open-mouthed.
"It was so hot we decided to jump in," I lie blatantly.
"In a suit?" Selim asks, arching an eyebrow.
"It's a joke of ours, you wouldn't understand," Serkan says, pulling me close. He holds my waist firmly, stabilizing me in the water. We are in the same position as when we kissed at the party.
I feel a sudden dizziness. My heart, which was racing from the joke, now seems to skip a beat. I observe the guests, the dinner I'll have to face... and suddenly, everything goes black. The world spins. I feel Serkan's grip loosen as I fall back into the water, and then, the void.
What do I feel for Serkan? He is impossible, insufferable, robotic... but his presence is an addiction. His touch, the perfume, the cocky way he makes me laugh, the challenge in his gaze... it's all addictive. When I'm not with him, I can only think of him. I'm afraid. Is this an overwhelming passion? I never felt this for Ozan. Ozan was stability; Serkan is an adventure. As ironic as it is to think that a "robot" could be the greatest adventure of my life.