Sasuke scanned her face, finally accepting that this blond girl was, somehow, actually Naruto.
"Since you're Naruto..."
"Naruko! My name is Naruko!" she interrupted, puffing out her chest.
"Cough!" Sasuke let out a super awkward cough. "How did you even... become a girl?" He stared at her, and despite his 'cool guy' reputation, his face started heating up. Why does this idiot look so cute—No! Stop it! I'm Uchiha Sasuke. There's no way I'm thinking this!
Naruko noticed him staring and felt her ego inflating again.
[Sasuke is totally hypnotized by my beauty, hehe!] (๑´>᎑<)~*
Sasuke's cheek twitched. This absolute moron.
"I told you already! Heaven finally listened to my prayers!" Naruko chirped, leaning in closer. "Forget that, Sasuke, how do I look? Am I cute??" (⸝⸝ ˊvˋ⸝⸝ )??
"Idiot. How could a 'Dead Last' like you ever be cute? Hmph."
[How DARE you call this beautiful lady a Dead Last! I was actually gonna give you a chance, but I've officially changed my mind! Hmph!] (｡•̀ ⤙ •́ ｡ꐦ)
Sasuke clenched his fists, trying to stay annoyed, but looking at her pouting face made a tiny, genuine smile slip out.
(๑°o°๑) Naruko froze the second she saw it.
[Wow... this Sasuke smile is so beautiful It's such a waste that he doesn't smile like that more often.]
The second Sasuke heard that thought, his 'cool' mask snapped back into place. He whipped his head away, his ears turning a bright, embarrassed red.
"Naruto—uh, Naruko, what are you even gonna do now?" Sasuke asked, eyeing her suspiciously. Is this idiot really about to tell the whole village? Everyone's gonna freak out if this loser suddenly shows up in pigtails.
Naruko blinked, her brain finally processing the social disaster waiting to happen. [Actually, yeah... if the old man Hokage or the guys see me like this, they'll look at me like I'm some kind of freakish alien. Better keep this under wraps. Plus, having a secret with a cute guy? Is Totally main character vibes! (｡Ó﹏Ò｡)]
She flashed him a grin. "Sasuke, let's keep this between us for now, okay? It'll be our little secret! You're not gonna go blabbing to everyone, right? Pretty please?"
Sasuke gave her a look that was 50% "get away from me" and 50% "why are you cute." He smirked. "That depends on your attitude from now on, Dead Last."
Naruko beamed. "So you will keep it! Hehe, arigato, Sasuke! You're actually a decent human being deep, deep, deep down."
Sasuke rolled his eyes and started walking away without another word.
"Hey! Sasuke! Where do you think you're going, leaving a delicate lady like me all alone?" Naruko shouted, stomping her foot.
Sasuke stopped and looked back, deadpan. "You idiot, we finished the training ground cleanup an hour ago. Sakura and Kakashi-sensei left ages ago. How much longer do you plan on keeping me hostage here?"
[Wait, an hour?! This guy actually stayed here for a whole hour watching me glitch out and turn into a girl? He's totally obsessed with me! (,,>﹏<,,)]
Sasuke's actual thought I only stayed because I thought he was dying and I didn't want to explain the body to the police.
Naruko looked at him with a total puppy-dog face and grabbed his sleeve. Sasuke started to pull away, but he froze when he saw her expression.
[Ugh, starting today I'm living alone, and I've been scared of the dark since I was a kid,] Naruko thought. [Should I ask him if I can stay at his place just for tonight?]
Sasuke heard that and immediately wanted to shove her away and bark "No!" but he stopped himself. He couldn't risk Naruko finding out he was basically reading her mind like an open book.
Naruko took a deep breath, summoned all her courage, and blurred it out. "Sasuke... can I please stay at your place tonight? I feel totally unsafe being a girl all alone! Please! (っ╥﹏╥ς)"
"No," Sasuke snapped instantly, without even thinking.
"Why, Sasuke?! How can you leave such a delicate lady all by herself?"
"No. Absolutely not. Impossible."
Naruko sighed. [Sasuke is being a total wall. What now?] Then, a lightbulb went off. [Hehe, I'll just go crash at Shikamaru's place. Shikamaru is a chill guy, he'll definitely say yes. And even if he finds out I'm a girl, he's too lazy to tell anyone. He'll keep my secret for sure.]
Sasuke's face glitched and he suddenly grabbed her arm. "Idiot! What are you planning to do?"
"Let go of my arm, Sasuke! That hurts!"
Naruko looked at him, totally confused. [What is his problem? First he says I can't stay at his house, and now he wants to fight me? I didn't even do anything!]
Sasuke let go of her arm awkwardly and cleared his throat. "Cough... fine, you can stay at my place. Just... don't do anything stupid."
"Really? Really?!" ⚞(｡Ó﹏Ò｡)⚟
Sasuke just groaned. He didn't even know why he was doing this, but the second he "heard" her plan to go to Shikamaru's, he couldn't stand the idea.
Naruko's Internal Monologue: [Victory! My puppy-dog eyes are 100% effective! He acted tough but he totally folded hehe]
ദ്ദി◝ ⩊ ◜.ᐟ
Sasuke didn't even wait for a response; he just started walking, leaving Naruko in the dust. When she realized her Sasuke was ditching her, she scrambled after him, her pigtails flying.
"Sasuke! Why did you leave without me?!" she yelled, catching up.
[This cold-faced jerk needs to learn some manners. How could he just leave a delicate lady behind like that? Hmph!]
Sasuke finally hit his limit. He'd been insulted in her head all day, and he wasn't taking it anymore. He stopped dead, turned around, and leaned in close with a deadly, dangerous smirk.
"Wh-wh-what are you doing? Stay back or I'll scream!" Naruko stammered, backing up.
[Wait... am I so beautiful that Sasuke can't control his animal instincts anymore?! Is he gonna attack me? No, no, Sasuke, you can't do this... it's my first time! (๑´>᎑<)~* Kyaaaaa!]
Sasuke's face twisted in pure disgust. He reached out and flicked her forehead so hard it made a loud thwack.
Naruko, whose face was already bright red and literally leaking a tiny bit of nosebleed from her own pervy imagination, got snapped back to reality instantly.
"Awww! Sasuke! Why did you hit me?!" she whined, clutching her head with teary eyes.
"Idiot," Sasuke muttered. He turned back around and kept walking, his chest puffed out a little. He felt 100% better after getting that tiny bit of revenge.
[You... Sasuke... I'm gonna remember this! Just you wait, hmph!]
After they walked for about 10 minutes, Naruko's stomach let out a loud groan. Her face, which was still pouting because of Sasuke's forehead flick, turned bright red.
[I haven't eaten anything today! That old man Hokage only gives me a 1000 ryo allowance, and a bowl of ramen costs 80 ryo! And D-rank mission pay is total garbage.]
Hearing her thoughts, Sasuke actually felt a tiny bit bad. This idiot has lived like this since the start... He thought about his parents, at least had them until he was seven. His fists clenched as he thought of Itachi. I'll get my revenge soon... you'll pay for the blood you spilled.
"Gurgle gurgle!"
The sound of Naruko's stomach snapped him back to reality. He looked at her and gave a heavy, annoyed sigh. "What do you want to eat? It's on me."
Naruko's eyes literally turned into sparkling stars. "Really?! For real?!"
"Idiot, just say what you want before I change my mind."
"Hehe! Then this lady wants Korean barbeque!"
"Transform back into your original look," Sasuke muttered, glancing around the street. "Unless you want the whole village knowing your secret."
Naruko pouted, clearly offended that he wanted her 'true beauty' hidden. "Fine, fine. I get it!"
She quickly wove three hand signs: Dog → Boar → Tiger. Henge no Jutsu!
With a small poof of white smoke, the blonde girl disappeared, and the loudmouth, spiky-haired Naruto stood there once again in his orange jumpsuit.
Sasuke stared at him for a second, his brain still buffering. He couldn't believe this pathetic, noisy idiot had transformed so much in a single day.
[Hmph! Even though I'm a boy again, I can still feel my feminine charms radiating through this transformation. Sasuke is definitely still staring because he's obsessed with me!]
Sasuke's eye twitched. Calm down, he thought, she's an idiot. Just ignore her. He turned and headed for the BBQ restaurant, while Naruto followed closely behind, beaming with energy.