READING GUIDANCE
" This is a direct sentence in the present time."
" This is a direct sentence in the past time."
' This is a character's inner thought in the present time.'
' This is a character's inner thought in the past time.'
[ This is a direct sentence in sign language in the present time.]
[ This is a direct sentence in sign language in the past time.]
HAPPY READING!
The previous world of the girl who is now living in the unknown fantasy world was full of busy noises and crowded people, who seemed as if time was racing their lives. It was filled with many expectations and achievements that were stereotypically built into society.
Strangely enough, they followed them as if it were a natural thing to do.
Even though life was already hard enough to live, it seemed humans had to fulfill others' expectations while they only had two hands, two ears, and two feet to move forward.
Yet, the girl was also one who followed the molded stereotype. In her previous life, she lived up to people's expectations her entire life, even until the end of her miserable breath. Back then, life felt so chaotic and short. Even after living 27 years, the girl still questioned whether there was something she could embrace as a good memory in her life.
.
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The girl's name was Lara Dena. She was the sole daughter of the CEO of a well-known company. People said she was a perfect daughter, as she was healthy, talented, smart, and beautiful—and yes, she once thought the same about herself. She believed the world revolved around her. The mindset that people should put her first was like an absolute truth. She desperately sought to be acknowledged, to be justified by others, as she never felt truly fulfilled.
he girl would do anything to make herself number one. Even if it meant ruining another person's life, she would do it if necessary. Whether it meant throwing away people's projects, burning their homework, or bullying them—she would commit these dirty deeds despite her young age.
Even as she grew older, the methods only became more refined. She would quietly push capable employees out of their positions if they threatened her authority, manipulate internal reports to take credit for someone else's achievements, or use the influence of her family's company to ensure that certain competitors never rose high enough to challenge her.
Of course, her heart was shaken sometimes; her inhumanity began to crumble every time she looked at the people she had slowly ruined. But she closed her eyes and convinced herself that it was all right because she felt she had to do it.
She believed she had to do this because she desperately wanted to hear praise from her parents. She yearned for their recognition, and every day she thought that if she could meet their expectations, maybe the spacious dark room where she always returned would not be dark anymore. Perhaps there would be a time when the three of them could be together again, like the other families she saw every day of her life. She envied them, questioning why they had such a family, where they could share happiness and sadness, while she did not.
Her frustration and ambition drove her to many unethical actions, all in pursuit of her single wish. She felt the weight of guilt gnawing at her, but she buried it, convincing herself that the ends justified the means. Every task her parents demanded, she tackled with relentless determination, even when it meant stepping over others—and hiding the cost in her own heart.
.
.
...for a small hope her younger self dreamed of.
Just for that little thing.
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But life sometimes seemed like a cruel joke. Despite all her struggles to protect and hold together the crumbling family, on her 17th birthday, both of her parents decided to divorce.
Her heart shattered into pieces. It hurt so badly, as if her whole life had ended. Through her urgent tears, she asked her mother, looking deeply into her eyes—eyes she hadn't truly seen for a long time:
"Why are you choosing this path?" She hoped there would be something that would heal the heartbreak inside her. She longed for the comfort she had sought since childhood, hoping something could change even though her rational mind and reality had already shown her the fights, yelling, and screaming of her parents every time she saw them together. It was so hurtful and painful, yet she tried to deny it. "Can't you try to fix this? You have to, you have to fix this!"
But her mother frowned painfully and said, "Why do you ask me for something impossible? Why does everyone ask me for something I cannot do?!" She yelled at her for the first time. "Can't you see how I have tried every day for you?"
The girl could not accept it. "What have you done for me?" she asked, finding it absurd to be told by someone who had seemingly done nothing for her that they had tried for her sake.
"Can't you see how I tried to survive for you?" her mother asked desperately. "CAN'T YOU SEE THAT I LOST MY FREEDOM BECAUSE OF YOU?!"
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The girl frowned miserably. "So am I the cause of all this?" she screamed. "AM I THE REASON OUR FAMILY IS BROKEN? WHILE YOU ARE THE ONE WHO RUINED OUR LIFE—YOU ARE THE ONE WHO RUINED MY LIFE!"
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"DON'T YOU DARE TALK TO ME LIKE THAT!" Her mother's face reddened with fury. "I did not give birth to you for you to act like this to me—"
.
"Why did you give birth to me then? I never asked to be your daughter! It would be better if I didn't exist with a mother like you!"
.
The girl then thought it would be better not to have been born to such a mother, who left her alone with a father who did nothing but burden her with high expectations. She could neither care for nor realize how her mother's expression became so sullen and desperate. She was filled with too much hatred to even think about her mother at that time. Moreover, the expectations from her father were all harsh and high, and if she was unable to meet them, either torture or starvation would be her end.
Her prideful self then resolved to do anything to reach the place people expected her to be. It was all driven by the hatred and fury she could not let go of. She was blinded by revenge, determined to show people that she could achieve the happiness she once desired.
Her entire life then slapped her with all the wicked things that life could give. Betrayal, trust issues, and other miseries broke her heart to the point where she could no longer feel any emotion.
She then realized there would be nothing she could expect from anyone. She understood that she would be alright if she stood at the highest position. Only in that way, she thought, would no one ever try to hurt her heart again.
She built walls that no one could ever trespass. She kept her emotions inside herself and did not let anyone in. Just like when her father fell ill and died, she did not care for him at all and left him to die alone in loneliness.
... did she not feel guilty at all?
She did. Yet, she faked it. The pain she once felt was real, engraving memories into the broken heart that could not be fixed.
In the end, as is natural for human beings, the girl tried to defend her heart and became as emotionless as one could be. She focused on what she thought was worth—her position and wealth. She learned that power and money would protect her despite everything.
.
But then, that man came.
A young man who, seeking his fortune, applied as a new employee at the company she owned. He was charismatic, talented, and humble. He was the one who could stay as her assistant despite her merciless nature. He always sincerely smiled at her and showed her ideas she had never seen before in her life.
The sincerity of friendship.
The sincerity of humanity.
The affection that one could give to another.
Yet, she was skeptical. Even though her heart said the opposite, the girl kept her distance from the man. She ignored him to the point where she could do whatever she pleased to him—physically hurting him, mentally destroying him. Yet, the man would only smile while talking about his beautiful life. He shared stories about how he had just started a new life with his beautiful wife and child. Then he would invite her into his tiny world.
"You are too busy to know my baby's cuteness," he said with his silly smile.
"... You are too naïve to act like that in this kind of world," she bluntly replied.
Yet, the man smiled gently. "... This world is too beautiful for me to be embarrassed to be a naïve person."
And she chuckled. "You will just end up ruining your pitiful life with that way of thinking."
"It might, if you are my boss." He giggled as if it were a joke. She just ignored it, even though her heart was starting to melt.
At that time, neither of them expected that her empty words would become reality so soon. She had begun to open her heart, trying to believe in him, in his sincerity. And then—she foolishly accepted a sly lie.
Her life was filled with enemies, hidden behind masks of loyalty. They seized their chance when they saw her closeness to him. And his naivety—his simple, trusting heart—led to a massive misunderstanding. The tea he brought... poisoned.
She survived. Physically, she was fine.
But her trust, her careful faith in someone else, shattered like glass.
Her chest ached. Her stomach churned. Every beat of her heart screamed betrayal. It wasn't the poison that hurt her—it was him. It was always him. The one she had started to trust had handed her heartbreak in a delicate, lethal package. She folded her arms around herself and wept silently, turning the hurt into a bitter hatred that settled like ice inside her.
Then, news came. Not long after his trial, he was found dead in his cell. Suicide, they said at first—but later, the investigation revealed it was murder. She couldn't look at it. She didn't want to know. And yet... she learned, piece by piece, that the man who had once offered her sincerity had discovered something strange within her company. He had tried to act alone. And before he could protect himself, her enemies struck—and he was gone.
Her chest tightened. Her vision blurred. The world she had barely started to trust—the one in which she had dared to hope—collapsed. She couldn't breathe. She couldn't think.
"He investigated movements inside your company."
"We found the proof he had collected."
"It seemed he was about to tell you about it."
And in that instant, everything she had ever relied on—everything she had believed in—crumbled.
"... his baby died because of cancer."
"... his wife visited several times and asked to meet you, but you ordered us to ignore her."
"It seems after he's gone, the wife could not pay for the operation, and the baby could not survive."
And she frowned painfully. "Since when did the baby have cancer?"
Her worker looked at her in confusion. "... ever since he was born," he said. "It was also his motivation to work in this company after all."
She then collapsed, with a huge pain that she could not bear inside her chest. It hurt so much as she found it hard to breathe.
Then, as if it was not enough that fate meddled in her life, at that very second in her office, an unknown woman came in without notice. The woman who would become her endless terrifying nightmare looked at her with a lifeless gaze. Her eyes were swollen while tears were still streaming down her face.
"..Miss, this place is no—" but then they quickly realized what she brought in her hand, which made them back off while taking out their guns. "PUT THAT GUN DOWN, MA'AM!" they shouted as they moved in front of her, confused by the situation.
Yet, the woman just smirked faintly at her. "Ms. Lara, I always wanted to see you because my husband... my dear husband... who just died, always talked a lot about you," she said.
Then it was easy for her to realize, even in that situation, that the woman in front of her was the wife of the man.
The woman frowned painfully while holding her chest tightly, as if she wished it were not there so the pain would go away. She gasped repeatedly as if breathing itself was difficult, and looking at the woman hurt the girl even more as she frowned in confusion.
"Back when my husband was still in jail for a false accusation, I begged the people to let me in," she said. "... I begged for them to let me meet you, as he wanted me to tell you something," she said bitterly.
Then, taking her time for a while before opening her mouth again,
"... if you had a little bit of humanity inside yourself—if you ever thought about what people have been through—they would be here with me."
"My loved ones... you killed both of them," she cried in torment.
"You are not human, are you?" she said, smiling faintly.
"Of course you are—my husband was the fool who let you go inside his world."
"I BEGGED YOU! I BEGGED YOU! I BEGGED YOU SO MUCH!" she cried hysterically, while the misery, disappointment, rage, and loss of life in her expression were so agonizing that they pierced her deeply, to the point she felt she might lose consciousness.
"... It's all because of you."
"All of it is because of you."
"You are the murderer."
"Give them back to me," she begged, while slowly raising the gun with her trembling hand and gazing at her with miserable, lifeless eyes. "He adored you so much, but you killed him."
"My son will be two this year. He is so lovely. Yet... you also killed him."
"YOU, YOU KILLED THEM! YOU TOOK THEM AWAY FROM ME!" she muttered while swaying the gun she held. With her lifeless gaze and the same muttering repeated again and again—
she pointed the gun at her head.
A loud sound was heard.
DOOR!
Fresh flesh and blood scattered and splattered onto her body. A horrific scene of a destroyed body covered in red collapsed to the floor, flooding it with thick blood and a strong rust-like smell.
The sudden nausea made her throw up and collapse immediately.
.
.
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After that, her life was never the same. Both her principles and desires gradually faded. She could no longer face anything the way she once did. The depiction of her sins haunted her constantly.
Then what the girl came to see as karma struck her. Strangely, a massive truck crashed into the car she was driving alone, leading her to the first moment she truly understood human sincerity. It was also the first moment she regretted her past sins, yet lacked the courage to ask for a second chance.
... And life felt like a playground for her.
It granted her a second life she had never asked for, allowing her to meet an innocent girl who became her little sister. It placed her as a mute and deaf commoner in a world she was unfamiliar with.
Yet, the girl who had once lost all hope found a single purpose to move forward.
Even though it was difficult, she found solace in the happiness of her sister.
In the end, it was all about her sister. She never truly lived for herself. She was acutely aware of her sins.
.
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So she never expected happiness to come her way.
.
She felt she had no right to ask for it. Her sins and regrets were etched deeply in her heart, and she believed they were meant to stay there. Thus, the moment she began to feel happiness for the first time, she was terrified.
Because... I am a sinner.
And... the desire for a sinner to live fully was a terrifying thing.
***