Chapter 233: I'm Going to F—Hm? Why is it You Guys?
"Mmph..."
"Mmmph mmph—!"
A thick bamboo pole creaked rhythmically under the shifting weight. Haruto took the front, Kaguya took the rear, and suspended right in the middle was a tightly bound Tewi. The rabbit youkai was trussed up like a holiday roast, her head completely swallowed by a coarse burlap sack, leaving her to thrash wildly and muffle her protests through a heavy gag.
The commotion drew the attention of the local youkai lining the dirt roads of the Human Village. Doors cracked open, and curious heads poked out from behind wooden shutters. However, the moment their eyes landed on the two individuals carrying the pole, the shutters slammed shut. The villagers instantly pulled back into the shadows, collectively deciding they hadn't seen a single thing.
Meanwhile, Mokou had just stepped out of the Terakoya. She stretched her arms overhead, intending to check if Haruto and Kaguya had returned from their errands, when the hushed, rapid-fire gossip of the roadside residents caught her sharp ears.
"What's going on out there? The one tied up in the middle is a youkai, right? They're screaming so miserably."
"Looks like a rabbit youkai... sounds like she's crying for help."
"Abducting a rabbit in broad daylight? Hiss... Has the security in our Human Village really deteriorated to this extent?"
Hearing the word 'abduction', Mokou's casual demeanor vanished. She froze, her jaw locking tight. Someone actually dared to cause trouble in her jurisdiction?
And a blatant, brazen kidnapping in broad daylight, no less.
You really want to die, don't you?
Searing, crimson flames manifested out of thin air, licking at the edges of her silver hair and crackling around her fists. Mokou lunged forward, grabbing the nearest gossiping youkai by the collar.
"Where did they go?" she demanded, her voice dropping to a dangerous, gravelly pitch. "I'm going to kill them!"
The youkai she had grabbed happened to be a massive Bear Youkai, his arms as thick as wooden rain barrels. Being suddenly yanked backward, he spun around, his face twisting into a furious snarl.
"Who the hell do you think you're grabb—"
The roar died in his throat. The moment his eyes focused on the blazing silver-haired girl glaring up at him, he swallowed his curse so fast he nearly choked. The towering beast's expression instantly melted into a trembling, fawning smile.
"R-reporting, Lord Mokou!" he stammered, his massive frame shrinking. "They went east! Judging by the direction... they're probably heading towards Kourindou!"
"Damn it! Pulling this kind of stunt on my turf!"
Mokou shoved the massive Bear Youkai aside like a ragdoll and sprinted eastward, leaving a trail of scorched footprints in the dirt as she bolted toward Kourindou.
Only after her blazing figure had completely vanished down the street did the Bear Youkai dare to raise a trembling hand, wiping the heavy beads of sweat from his furry brow.
A younger Wolf Youkai standing next to him tilted his head in sheer confusion. "Who was that woman? Brother Bear, why are you so afraid of her? She doesn't even look that strong."
The Bear Youkai's eyes widened in horror. He quickly slapped a thick, black-clawed finger over the wolf's mouth and hissed, "Shh!"
He cast a paranoid, sweeping glance down the road toward Kourindou, praying she hadn't overheard. Once he was certain she wasn't coming back, he threw a heavy arm around the Wolf Youkai's shoulder and leaned in, his voice dropping to a grave whisper.
"Brother, you've just arrived in Gensokyo, so you don't know the rules yet. Take my advice and carve it into your bones: in the Human Village, never, ever cause trouble! And above all else, never cause trouble in front of her!"
"Why?" The wolf blinked, skeptical. "Is she really that strong?"
"Strong?"
The Bear Youkai shook his head slowly, letting out a hollow, broken chuckle as if he had just heard a terrible joke. His expression darkened, shadows falling over his snout.
"Let me put it this way. Three years ago, when I first crossed the boundary into Gensokyo, I had three sworn brothers. Their strength was absolutely no less than mine. We planned to become the local overlords, to rule the streets, so we decided to start by taking over the Human Village..."
The Wolf Youkai's ears perked up, startled. "And you lost to her?"
"It was a hell of a lot more than just losing!"
The Bear Youkai's voice began to violently tremble, his massive, barrel-chested body shuddering like a leaf in a winter storm.
"At that time, she... she was just casually muttering about needing to hurry up and buy groceries... all while she was tearing my three brothers apart... with her bare hands."
"T-tore them apart?!" The wolf choked.
"Yes. With. Her. Bare. Hands."
The Wolf Youkai stared blankly for a second, his mind supplying a vivid, horrifying image of the small girl ripping fully grown bears limb from limb. A violent shudder wracked his spine. He immediately made up his mind.
From this day forward, whenever he saw that silver-haired girl, he would take a massive, respectful detour.
At the same time, Mokou chased the culprits all the way to the dusty outskirts of the Human Village. Up ahead, she finally spotted the two "abductors" the residents had been whispering about.
It was just that... the closer she got, the more familiar those two slouching, entirely un-intimidating backs looked.
"You two, stop right there!"
She shouted angrily, her fists igniting. The two figures in the distance paused and turned around at the sound of her voice.
Mokou's flames instantly fizzled out. It was indeed Haruto and Kaguya.
"Damn it, it really is you guys! What the hell are you doing?" Mokou stomped forward, aggressively rubbing her temples and cursing under her breath. "I really thought some sick bastard was abducting a rabbit in broad daylight!"
As soon as the trussed-up Tewi heard Mokou's voice through the burlap sack, she began to thrash with renewed vigor, letting out excited, muffled 'mmph mmph!' sounds as her body wriggled frantically against the bamboo pole.
Seeing the jig was up, Haruto sighed, his shoulders slumping lazily. He simply untied the thick ropes and let the rabbit drop to the dirt with a soft thud.
The moment Tewi's hands and feet were free, she scrambled up, immediately ripping the suffocating hood off her head. She looked around in a wild panic, her ruby-red eyes darting everywhere.
Her gaze first landed on Mokou, then swept over Haruto's deadpan face, and finally Kaguya's serene, smiling visage. After locking eyes with her two captors for a split second, her long rabbit ears visibly drooped flat against her head.
The next second, she spun on her heels and bolted.
She moved like a blur, kicking up a cloud of dust. But without a single warning, a pitch-black Gap, lined with eerie crimson eyes, split open directly on the ground in her path.
Tewi, however, seemed to have anticipated the trick. She slammed on the brakes, her shoes skidding in the dirt, and leaped high into the air, executing a flawless, graceful backflip over the void.
With a heavy 'thump,' she landed perfectly... straight into a second Gap that Haruto had maliciously opened precisely at her landing spot.
She fell through the void and tumbled out onto the dirt right at Haruto's feet.
"Wahhh—! It's not the rabbit's fault! The rabbit didn't do anything!"
Watching Haruto and Kaguya approaching step by step, Tewi scrambled backward on her hands and knees. She shook her head like a frantic rattle drum, her long rabbit ears flailing wildly from side to side.
"We're just looking for you to—" Haruto started, raising a hand.
"I won't do it again! I'll confess! I'll confess everything!" Tewi shrieked, squeezing her eyes shut. "Actually, I accidentally broke your keyboard! And your computer! And the princess's computer! Last time, a Kappa gave me a sketchy website link, and I swear I just clicked it to take a look, and then, then the whole screen turned blue! But the princess's computer isn't my fault! Reisen was curious and used the princess's computer to look at that weird website too!"
Haruto blinked, his hand freezing in mid-air. He had originally just tracked her down to borrow her absurd luck for a gacha draw, but his presence seemed to have triggered some deep-seated guilt switch, causing Tewi to spill every single 'good deed' she had secretly committed in one breathless go.
Mokou stood off to the side, her jaw slightly slack as she listened to the rapid-fire confession.
Haruto's expression slowly turned incredibly subtle. A vein gave a faint throb at his temple.
He had spent the last three days wondering why his perfectly fine, top-of-the-line computer had mysteriously blue-screened and died. So, it was this damn rabbit sneaking into his room and clicking on virus-riddled Kappa links.
"We're not looking for you about that," Haruto said, his voice completely flat, though his eyes promised future retribution. He pointed a thumb over his shoulder at the large, flashy signboard propped near the entrance of Kourindou. "We just want to ask for your help with a lottery draw."
"...Huh?"
Tewi's frantic scrambling ground to a halt. She blinked, thoroughly taken aback, and followed the direction of his finger.
[Kourindou Grand Lottery Discount — Contains physical gold, silver, rare figurines, and special magic items!]
Tewi's little face instantly flushed with pure, unadulterated indignation. She jumped to her feet, brushing the dirt off her dress. "Why didn't you just say so earlier?! And is tying me to a pole and throwing me in a sack how you ask someone for help?!"
Kaguya stepped forward, her dark eyes narrowing into a beautiful but utterly terrifying crescent shape. "Then this lady and Haruto will just have to settle the account with you right now for secretly destroying our computers."
"Th-that was actually all Reisen's idea! It's really not the rabbit's fault!"
Tewi shifted the blame without batting a single eye, her survival instincts kicking into overdrive. But under the intense, predatory gazes of the two immortals, she timidly shrank her neck, her ears folding back defensively.
"Fine, fine... The rabbit will help you draw, alright? Just don't hurt me."
"Then thank you, our dear little Tewi."
Haruto's terrifying aura vanished instantly. He reached a hand into a small Gap and fished out a brightly colored lollipop, casually tossing it over.
"Here, have some candy as payment."
Tewi's rabbit ears twitched, perking straight up. She caught the candy out of the air, curiously tore off the plastic wrapper, and popped it into her mouth. The sweet strawberry flavor hit her tongue, causing her eyes to crinkle into happy little crescents.
"Tasty, right?" Haruto asked dryly.
"Not bad," Tewi nodded, sucking on the candy.
"Here. Take all of these."
Haruto reached into the Gap again and unceremoniously dumped a massive, cascading mountain of lollipops directly into her arms. It was every single consolation prize he had drawn from his previous, disastrously unlucky gacha pulls.
Tewi's ruby eyes widened in absolute delight. Smiling brightly, she began rapidly stuffing the mountain of lollipops into the deep inner pockets of her gothic dress. Once the loot was secured, she patted her completely flat chest with absolute assurance.
"Leave it to this rabbit! I guarantee I'll draw all the grand prizes for you!"
Mokou, who had been silently watching this entire bizarre exchange from the sidelines, wore an incredibly complicated expression. She looked at the sheer volume of candy bulging from Tewi's pockets and couldn't help but ask.
"Haruto... where exactly did you get so many lollipops?"
"Where do you think?"
At the mere mention of his previous gacha attempts, a dark, suffocating aura of pure salt and anger radiated from Haruto's body. Without saying another word, he shoved his hands into his pockets and marched into Kourindou, with Kaguya and a happily skipping Tewi following right behind him.
Mokou stood in the dirt road, hesitating for a moment. But ultimately, she couldn't resist her burning curiosity and quickly jogged after them into the shop.
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