"What is it with you and Uncle and this tea?!" came an irritated snarl from behind me.
"Well..." I shrugged. "Whenever you find yourself in a situation you don't understand, it's worth drinking tea. While you pour it, warm it, or take a sip, you get a little extra time to think, while"—I took a sip—"all propriety is maintained. And besides..."
"Besides what?" The girl came several steps closer and, I could have sworn, folded her arms across her chest.
"Besides, it simply tastes good and is certainly healthier than alcohol, which gives you the illusion of pleasure in exchange for your self-control, reflexes, and ability to think clearly, leaving you vulnerable," I admitted.
"Good tea, on the other hand, invigorates you and sharpens the mind." I took another sip.
"What..." Azula's light boots slid softly across the metal, and I felt someone's back settle against mine. "...nonsense," the girl finished, apparently resting her chin on her knees.
"So, how about that tea? This time I even brought a second bowl..." Truth be told, I brought it along "just in case" every single time. Because whenever I remembered our previous "little get-togethers," all sorts of nonsense about "indirect kisses" started creeping into my head, which in turn brought back memories of very much direct kisses. And the desire to repeat them.
But... I was trying to resist temptation and avoid sticking my head into the lion's jaws, so yes, I carried a second tea bowl with me. Purely as a precaution, however strange that might seem.
"..." Displeased huffing.
"Did I say something wrong?" I broke the silence once it entered its second minute.
"You're always saying the wrong thing," I was immediately accused.
"Am I?"
"How am I supposed to laugh at your jokes when you don't joke with me at all?" she demanded, abruptly presenting me with an entirely new grievance.
"Um..."
"You joke with Toph, with your warriors, even with Ty Lee, but you don't joke with me. How am I supposed to interpret that?"
"...Ah... I'm not sure how to answer that." What the hell was happening?! Why could I hear warning sirens and a red alert going off in my head?!
"You don't even dodge anymore by showering me with words about your respect for my royal birth!" Azula continued, steadily ratcheting up the level of indignation. "That, you know, is unforgivable!" she added with a new note in her voice—still indignant, but now somehow vaguely instructive as well. "It's negative differentiation! I know all about that... I'm good at it," she continued, now with an unmistakably academic edge to her analysis of the issue.
"No. I definitely haven't been singling you out in a negative way." Meanwhile, my heart was pounding, and somehow I didn't feel much like drinking tea anymore...
"Well, it certainly looks like you have," she objected in a tone that... wasn't indignant at all anymore. It was reproachful.
"No. Definitely not." Damn it! I should have gone to bed—my exhausted brain was malfunctioning and couldn't come up with a normal response!
"Prove it," came the uncompromising demand.
"How?" Damn me for bringing that second bowl! If I'd only brought one, maybe there wouldn't have been all that huffing and the conversation would have gone in a completely different direction!
"Tell me a joke," Azula promptly replied, confirming just how much trouble I was currently in.
"Um..." Brains, work, you bastards! "Do earthbenders ride ostrich horses because they're self-conscious about being so heavy and ponderous and want to compensate with a bird's lightness, or because they see kindred spirits in ostriches sticking their heads in the sand?" I offered the closest thing to a joke I could come up with.
"Ha. Ha. Ha..." The princess attempted a carefree little laugh.
Then she fell silent.
"...That sounded so stupid and pathetic," she said a few seconds later, making no attempt to conceal her frustration.
"Uh... what was the point of that?" I risked asking, carefully avoiding any emphasis on whether she considered my joke stupid and pathetic or her laugh. Because that way lay danger, yes.
"My friends' advice," came the dry and exceptionally concise reply.
"Okay... so what am I supposed to do?"
"That's my question," Azula replied, doing absolutely nothing to make my life easier.
As usual.
"And... what's the answer?"
"You tell me." She's messing with me!
"Maybe we should just have some tea after all?"
"Argh! You're acting like Iroh!" The lady abruptly sprang to her feet.
And the next moment, a quick kiss burned against my cheek, a-a-and...
Tap-tap-tap—slam!
The princess left the observation deck.
"What the hell was that?" No, what had just happened was obvious enough: the girl had fled. For some reason. And for some reason, she had come here knowing perfectly well that I would be here. But at the same time, she clearly hadn't had any sort of plan...
Surely she hadn't actually planned to kiss me, only to get scared of something at the last second, settle for a peck on the cheek, and run away? I mean, this was Azula! That was completely unlike her!
My thoughts descended into a certain amount of chaos. I understood her behavior... and at the same time, I didn't. In short, it was complicated. And I had absolutely no idea what to do next.
Except maybe...
I glanced sideways at the tea bowl.
Yeah. Whenever you find yourself in a situation you don't understand, just sit there and drink tea.
(End of Chapter)
P@treon: /SadRaven
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