Am I a person to you? I see your posts, stories, text messages. I see all of it. "I'm just too busy to talk" but you have time to message every other person? Remember everyone else's birthdays? You make time to call them but not the person who's been with you for years? The one who made time for you no matter what? Even in the middle of the night when you were hysterically screaming about everything? When you wanted me to watch you harm yourself because you thought how I flinched at the sight of your blood was funny? The way you made me fall in love with you, said you wanted to marry me, planned out my fantasies with you and abandoned me? Then when I finally had enough and said I was gonna leave, " I'm sorry, I was just really busy the past 8 months. " I know I texted and called every other person you knew and they told you they heard from me but I really was just busy" what about me? "Let's die together." Okay… "when I decided to end it you have to promise you will too." This isn't what I wanted but I promised you ignored me when I said I was tired. You said you loved me… you said you'd always love me. You said nothing would change and that you'd be there for me. I was there for you. I forgot about everyone else. The people who actually cared for me. Fuck you. But I love you? I can't let you go. Please don't leave me. I don't want you to go, I need you. I told you I couldn't do it but you didn't listen. Whenever I see your stories with all your other friends, all I can think is how much I hate you. And them for taking you from me. But I just realized, you never cared. You don't hate me. You don't love me. You never even cared about me. When I have nothing to offer you, I'm nothing. So fuck it, I don't care anymore. I don't want to keep existing like this. There's someone out there who likes me for me. And I'm sure you'll find another victim you can blame or maybe I'll never leave and I'll just distance myself until I realize how happy I am without you. Maybe…
