Liam could feel her heart beating so strongly. At first he wanted to believe that it was because she was lying, but he knew her better than that, he knew that it was because she was indeed telling the truth.
She was telling him the truth, she was being so transparent with him, but he just could not handle it. He realized that it was a problem within himself. Something had been broken within him, and he did not know how to fix it.
The more she spoke, the more the pain resurfaced. It felt like his heart was breaking, as if it was failing him. The only relief he had was that she was still chaste, but when he remembered how Mero had hugged her, kissed her, caressed her. He just felt like he could not forgive her or him.
Wura was so brokenhearted. She was trying her best to be sincere, she did not want him to feel bad, but she could not take the way the pain that she had inflicted on him and herself.
"How long did you and him continue to hide your relationship," he asked.
Wura sniffed and put down his hand but continued to hold it.
"When we returned to the camp, it was as if the veil of confusion and lustre on the relationship was removed. We realized, or at least I did realize that this was far too selfish. There were many people we were hurting, people we cared about that would be so disappointed and people who counted on us as beacons of light," she said.
"I could not continue. I felt like I was betraying you, which I was, and I was also harming everyone else in the process, especially Nora.".
"Because of that, I asked that we end things, and Mero understood me, he said that he would never love anyone else as he did me," she said.
Liam looked away when he heard those words. The thing was that he knew Mero well, and if he admitted those words, then they had to be true. His most trusted friend and confidant had fallen for his wife, and it was just too much for him to bear.
"Mero insisted on ending his relationship with Nora, and I told him that regardless of of if he did, we could never continue what was forbidden and he agreed, although he continued to say that I would always be in his heart," Wura said.
"Nora felt so much pain when he ended things with her. She could not understand why, and I could not tell her why. I felt like such a traitor, and I am. Nora was bent on the fact that Mero ended things with her because he had another woman, and she asked me severally if I knew anything about it since Mero and I were close, and I opened my mouth many times, and I lied to her... directly at her face, I lied," Wura looked down.
She felt so ashamed of herself. Nora had every right to feel upset, angry and outraged all at once.
"That is why she asked to be far from you," Liam said.
"Yes, because I hurt her so much. I made her feel so much pain and I lied to her every single time she looked to me for comfort because I was indeed the cause of her misery," Wura said.
Liam did not know what to say. Wura was right, she did not only hurt him, but many other people in the process.
"When Mero ended things with Nora, she took a few days off her duties to get better, because I knew that she needed it. At that time, I stopped whatever it was that I had with Mero and I suppressed those feelings because deep in my mind, I knew that you would return and when you did, I would need to beg for your forgiveness as I am doing right now," she said.
"If that is the case, why did I find kissing him when I returned? Huh? Why did I see you two like that if things really ended? Why did you give him such a tender kiss, one that screamed of longing and love?".
Liam pulled his hand away. She could see that he was very angry, she could feel his pain and she did not know how she would have reacted had he been in a relationship with Darla or any other woman for that matter. It would hurt her so deeply, and that was why she knew to be understanding with him and listen to his shouting and his pain.
"I only kissed Mero then because I thought that I would lose him. Yet again, I put someone I care for in harm's way. I did not listen to him when the ambush attacks began, and he took an arrow for me. That arrow was meant for me Ian, and yet, he stepped in front and took it because of me," Wura said fighting back the tears.
"I did not want to lose him the same way I lost you. I thought it was the end, and if it was, I needed to show him that I truly cared for him, that there was a special place in my heart for him regardless of my confusion and anger. That was the result of that kiss, that was why I did it," she said.
"Liam, I will be honest with you. I do not regret it, because that was my right, and I did not want it to feel like I did not get the last chance to show him how much he means to me," Wura said so strongly.
Liam looked at Wura, he did not know how to feel. On one hand, he agreed with her, that was her right, and she had every reason to do what she did in her own eyes, but on the other, he just felt so betrayed that she was so confident in telling him that.
"Liam, I made a mistake, I know that I did, and I also know that I will continue to pay for what I did because I hurt so many people. All I want is for you to forgive me, please, forgive me Liam. I want to be with you," she said.
"I love you so much," she said.
Liam was silent, right now, he did not think that answering would give the best result. He was so confused, he wanted to stop feeling like this, but he also did not want to rush to say something, his emotions were a mess and his mind was conflicted.
"I need some time," he said.
"How much?" Wura asked. She did want to give him all the time and space that he wanted, but she feared that the longer they stayed away, the less chance for a reconciliation.
"I do not know for now, I just want some time," he repeated.
"Alright, I will give you as much time as you need," she held his hand tightly.
"Yes, and it is late, I am exhausted from the day," he said.
"Oh...".
Wura could tell from his tone that he wanted her to leave. She knew he needed some space, but she just could not bring herself to leave him. She wanted to stay close to him.
"Could you please leave? Go and sleep somewhere else, or I can leave," Liam stood up.
Wura felt her hands cold when he pulled away from her.
"No, no, you need to rest. I will leave," she said. She stood up straight and wiped away her tears.
"Thank you," Liam said.
"I want you to rest, do not stress yourself, you need the strength," she walked closer and wanted to give him a kiss on the cheek, but he moved away.
Wura could not handle the rejection. It was as if an arrow had been shot at her heart continually.
"Goodnight, Wura," he said.
"Goodnight Liam," she replied. "I will come for my things in the morning.".
With that, she took her leave and closed the door softly behind her.
Liam could no longer hold himself, he broke down in tears and fell on his bed. He felt so sorrowful. Words could not explain the anger, bottomless pit in his heart. Violence would not fill it, anger would not fill it, tears would not fill it, he did not know what would.
He felt so helpless, hopeless. For the first time in his life, he did not know what to do. Being so conflicted was pain and torture.
Wura had told him the entire truth, and now, he was not sure if he wanted to know the truth, because now his judgement was flawed and he did not know if he was in the right frame of mind to forgive. All he knew at the moment was to hate.
The hate and anger ran so strongly in his veins, and for the first time in his life, he was unsure if he could control this strong indignation.