Medical Center
While Adam and the gang were chatting and laughing, George snuck over again, trying to keep a low profile.
"Here comes our playboy," Liz teased. She and George were tight—bestie-level tight. The kind where she could brush her teeth and chat while he showered, no big deal. And the closer you are, the harder you laugh when your buddy screws up.
George's face darkened, especially when he spotted Meredith giggling at him from the side.
"Adam, I need your help with something," he said, sounding desperate.
"Is this about the shot?" Adam asked, shaking his head. "You should ask Meredith or Liz for that. They're your roommates and BFFs, after all."
"I'll help you, George," Meredith chimed in with a cheeky grin.
"Me too!" Liz added, egging him on.
"Then what are we waiting for?" Cristina laughed. "Let's get it done!"
Before George could protest, Liz grabbed him and dragged him toward a nearby patient room.
"Why are you all following me?" George grumbled as Liz half-pushed, half-pulled him inside. When he saw Adam and the others pile in after them, he lost it. "Out! Get out!"
"Quit whining and drop your pants already!" Cristina said, grinning.
Liz didn't waste time—she shoved George onto the exam table face-first and yanked his pants down in one swift move.
"Cute little tushy," she cooed.
"Hmm, not bad," Meredith added.
"Seriously, it's like a baby's," Cristina chimed in.
The three of them officially turned into a pack of shameless hooligans.
"Don't look at me!" George pleaded, shooting Adam a pitiful glance.
Adam stood there, arms crossed, trying not to laugh. "If you don't want it to get infected or end up losing your mind later, just let them do it."
"I've always fantasized about being in a room with you three, doing all sorts of unspeakable things," George muttered, giving up the fight as Liz jabbed a needle into each cheek. Wincing in pain and embarrassment, he added, "But reality's clearly way more exciting than my fantasies."
"Hold off on the excitement for a sec," Adam said, cutting in with a grin. "Did you talk to Olivia yet?"
"Yeah, I did," George replied, yanking his pants back up and glaring at the trio still cracking up. "She didn't say a word—just looked at me and bolted. Like I'm the one who gave it to her. Do you guys think I'm misjudging her here?"
"Don't overthink it," Adam said, shaking his head. "Nobody wants to admit they're the one who passed it on. Her reaction's pretty normal. Let's just hope word spreads and the hospital does something about it. Who knows how many people could end up with this?"
"Well, Cristina and I are definitely in the clear," Liz said confidently. "One perk of not messing around with guys."
Cristina's smile froze for a split second.
"I'm fine too," Meredith huffed. "I've only been with Shepherd…"
"But can you be sure Shepherd's only been with you?" Liz shot back, her tongue sharp as ever. "He's Mr. Dreamy, after all."
"So you're saying the more charming someone is, the more likely they are to catch it?" Meredith asked, sneaking a glance at Adam.
"Unless they keep it in their pants," Liz clarified.
"Shepherd's pretty good about that…" Meredith started, but Liz wasn't letting it go, and the two launched into a full-on bickering match.
Beep-beep.
Beep-beep.
Beep-beep.
George's pager went off. Then everyone else's followed suit, buzzing like crazy.
"Here we go," Adam said, glancing at his pager. The message said to head to the admin meeting room. He smirked knowingly.
"George, you're really in for it now," Liz teased, checking her own pager and joining the others in ribbing him again.
The group headed to the meeting room, laughing and chatting. Along the way, more people joined them—clearly, everyone had gotten the memo.
Conference Room
A big crowd of surgeons, nurses, and staff filled the room. Richard, the Chief of Surgery, stood there with his arms crossed, his face grim as he scanned the group. "Three surgical interns, four residents, and six nurses have tested positive for syphilis," he said, each word landing like a hammer. "And that's just what we know so far."
"Every year, over 70,000 new cases pop up. If it's not treated early, syphilis can lead to blindness, insanity, even death."
Patricia, Richard's no-nonsense admin assistant—an older lady—sat nearby and picked up where he left off. "So treat it ASAP."
"If you've had unprotected, uh, fun with anyone in surgery—or honestly, anyone in this hospital—get yourself checked immediately!" Richard barked, his expression icy. "This isn't a suggestion."
Olivia and George locked eyes for a second before both turned away, fuming.
Some people shifted nervously. Others, confident they were safe, smirked to themselves. Partly because the whole thing was kind of hilarious, and partly because of what was on Patricia's desk: a banana and a square little packet. Everyone knew what was coming next.
And sure enough, it didn't disappoint.
Richard rolled his eyes, looking defeated. "Patricia's going to demonstrate safe, uh, practices for you all." With that, he stormed out.
You'd think doctors and nurses wouldn't bat an eye at this stuff—it's routine, right? But that's exactly why Richard was mortified. His team knew better, and yet here they were, screwing up so bad it led to a full-blown outbreak. Talk about a hit to his reputation.
Now he could only hope the numbers didn't climb too high—and that maybe the internal medicine folks would mess up even worse. Misery loves company, after all.
"When the time comes," Patricia said, picking up the banana and the packet, "gentlemen, you know when that is. Carefully tear open the wrapper…"
The lesson wrapped up, and everyone scattered—some to line up for tests, others to get back to work.
"Adam, you finally came to see me!" Barney exclaimed from his wheelchair as Adam pushed him along. "Guess how many I've hooked up with already? You'll never guess. Not one, not two, not even three—six! Yeah!" He flashed a proud six with his fingers, grinning smugly. "In just two weeks, I'm almost done. You're toast, man."
"Impressive!" Adam said, giving him a thumbs-up.
"You're jealous, huh?" Barney beamed, then glanced around. "Wait, where are we going?"
"To get you checked out," Adam said with a smile.
"Checked for what?" Barney asked, then his eyes lit up. He leaned back, nodding toward the long line of people. "Look over there—one of my six is in that line. Cute, right? And that one too! Oh, and her! Wait… why are they all lining up?"
Before Adam could answer, Barney's face lit up even more. "Is this some kind of hospital group party? Nice! Adam, high-five me!"
"Sorry, can't do it," Adam said, shaking his head.
"Why not?" Barney pouted.
Adam handed him a colorful syphilis info pamphlet. "Take a look at this first."
"Noooo!!!"
Moments later, Barney's scream of despair echoed through the halls, loud enough to shatter the cosmos and break the fourth wall.
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