Trembling from nerves, Lu Yan walked deeper into the darkness of the ancestral hall. Behind the shrines, there was another small chamber.
As quickly as she could, she opened the window farthest from the main entrance. She wanted to go back to her little safe corner, but how would Lu Feng find this window if she left?
She had no choice but to put the lamp down and wait there. He should be able to see this faint light from the outside.
From the window, she could see stars filling up the sky. For a moment, she looked up feeling her own smallness.
But having the great nameless darkness at her back made her spine tingle. So she just sat down against the wall, clutching the lamp and facing the dark.
Looking at it made her uneasy. She buried her face in her knees and closed her eyes.
'He won't come. He won't come.' Echo taunted.
"Shut up," Lu Yan said. Her voice echoed in the empty chamber.
It felt like an eternity before she heard footsteps outside. Before she could stand up, Lu Feng had already vaulted into the hall with ease.
Startled, she looked up just as he looked down at the little ball curled up beside the window.
Suddenly, he grinned, teasing, "Were you scared?"
Lu Yan stood up quickly, boasting, "I am never scared."
He hummed, disbelieving.
She poked a finger into his midriff making him flinch.
He laughed lightly and closed the window.
Then he picked up the lamp, and said, "I can hold your hand if you're scared."
Lu Yan held out her hand, smiled sweetly, "You can hold my hand if you're scared."
Lu Feng laughed again, and taking the offered hand, he led them back to the main hall of the shrine.
He too had brought a cloak, and more pillows. They added to the little nest against the wall.
Lu Yan sprawled down. It was very comfortable, especially with Lu Feng right there.
She watched as Lu Feng produced snacks from his cloak and set them aside carefully.
Suddenly, she wondered what it would have been like to grow up with someone like him.
"Why do you return to the Lu ancestral house so rarely?"
"Why do you call it Lu ancestral house and not home?"
Lu Yan scoffed, "Because it's not home. I just returned, and no one wants me here."
Lu Feng frowned, "Returned? From where?"
Lu Yan was incredulous, "You don't know?"
When he shook his head, she continued, "I lived on a little farm for many years. Second aunt had me come back only because you all were returning from the border."
"A farm?!"
Lu Yan laughed, feeling bitter, "I can't believe you didn't know."
"Which farm?"
"It's outside the city. Located on an edge of the farmland the Lu family owns."
"You lived there alone?" he asked incredulously.
Lu Yan nodded, then asked again, "What about you?"
"The Lu family army camp is located outside the city. I have to be there to supervise. Mother and father are busy with court affairs."
Lu Yan perked up, "Will you take me to the camp?"
Lu Feng nodded, "You'll be my little aide for a month."
"That's great!" Lu Yan cheered.
"I thought you'd hate it." Lu Feng was a little confused by her enthusiasm.
"I get to go out of this stinky place. What's to hate?"
Lu Feng shook his head.
For a moment, silence fell between the two, then Lu Yan asked tentatively, "What was it like growing up with mother and father?"
Lu Feng looked at her cautious expression. Sighing inside, he told her little stories from his childhood on the border.
Lu Yan listened quietly. It was amazing how different their childhoods had been. He had a father instructing him in weapons and martial arts. A mother teaching him strategy. Tutors for calligraphy, literature and everything else. He went out hunting with his soldier friends. He had a little brother who wanted to follow him everywhere he went. The family of four went on occasional outings where they rode horses, ate barbecue and looked at scenery.
The more she listened, the more her heart sank. Why was the difference in treatment so big? Why had she been abandoned alone on a farm?
She had thought the return of her parents would change how she was treated in the Lu family. But nothing had changed. In fact, things were worse.
Lu Feng noticed her changing expression and cut himself short.
An awkward silence descended between the two.
Then Lu Yan asked quietly, "Do you know why mother and father hate me?"
Lu Feng wanted to say, they don't hate you, they just don't know you.
But his mother's behavior earlier had made him feel he was looking at a stranger. Even while negotiating with her in private, he'd felt something was unusual and she was unlike herself.
He shook his head, "I don't know."
The hopeful look in Lu Yan's eyes disappeared. She played idly with a thread on her sleeve.
Echo was mumbling something in her head. This time Lu Yan didn't suppress her, but tried to listen, wondering if she had any answers.
Lu Feng looked around, desperate to change the subject. His eyes fell on the scroll he'd seen earlier. He picked it up. At second glance, the scroll looked even more precious.
"Where did you get this?" he asked curiously.
Lu Yan looked up, and Lu Feng's heart leapt.
Her left eye was light colored again. Just this small change and she looked eerie and demonic.
Seeing his expression, Lu Yan self-consciously touched her face, and asked anxiously, "Is it light again?"
Lu Feng tried to even his face out, and nodded without speaking.
Lu Yan closed her eyes, and pushed and pushed the voice down. Again her head and neck started hurting. When the voice was as faint as she could make it, Lu Yan opened her eyes, and looked at Lu Feng questioningly.
"Is it gone?" she asked.
Lu Feng nodded, "It's gone."
Lu Yan rubbed the back of her neck tiredly.
Lu Feng asked, "You can control it?"
"I can suppress it, but it's really hard."
"What is it?" Lu Feng asked curiously, "And how did it start?"
Lu Yan hugged her knees tightly, trying not to look at the darkness surrounding them.
"In fact, it started when I was first locked up in this very hall."
Lu Feng felt a shiver rush over his spine. As Lu Yan continued talking, her eye color began to, slowly but surely, change again.
She seemed unaware, and continued, "It just appeared slowly, like a new leaf growing on a branch. One day there was nothing, but when I looked again, there was a whole new voice inside my head."
Lu Feng looked around the darkness of the ancestral hall, feeling uneasy.
When he turned back to her, her left eye was light again. The darkness seemed to have a weight as it pressed down on him.
What the hell was going on with this little girl?